Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

NFL athletes, dating, and mamma’s boys….

It’s an exciting time for a college athlete when they are drafted by an NFL team. Their dream of playing in the NFL is now coming to life. During this year’s past NFL draft we saw many guys that had their dreams come true and we also saw some guys get drafted by their hometown teams. Imagine not only getting drafted but also getting drafted by the team you rooted for or the team in the same state as your college! That must feel surreal.

But there has to come a point when their moms realize that their “little boys” are no longer seen as “little boys” and that they are seen as men. Last year’s draft pick Zach Wilson of the Jets has a wonderful relationship with his mom, he does, but this past weekend he was going to surprise her and fly home form Mother’s Day but she was in Florida with I would assume, her daughter’s All-Star Cheerleading team. I mean, hey, if that doesn’t tell you that he appreciates his mom, nothing will. But here’s my problem:

Check out what she wrote in her IG story:

Notice that she said, “My cute Zach…” Um, okay, Mrs. Wilson, he’s not 5 anymore, he’s WAY more than five…. calling him “cute” is okay when he was younger but he’s a GROWN man who plays in the NFL… calling him cute makes he look like a mamma’s boy and trust me, no guy in the NFL wants to be teased for that. Yes, he loves you, but he’s a man. Calling him cute on a public forum as he’s mom…. (insert not amused emoji)

Which brings me to the dating topic of conversation. Actually, it’s two-parts.
1) Guys that are “supposed” to be seen as tough guys, ya know, the ones in the NFL, can not be seen as mamma’s boys. Period. Yes, it is a sweet gesture to see them buy their moms houses, cars, etc, but that’s where the line is drawn. Should it be? That’s a different question, buy guys are picked on in the locker room about lots of things. Zach has come off as a guy that looks uncomfortable when his team mates are doing stupid high school shit, (AKA crushing up beer cans on your forehead, or the latest stupid video of the guys who were drafted last year videoing a message to the rookies – which really looked high school-ish.) Not only does he look uncomfortable doing some of those type things, and seriously who wouldn’t, but he looks uncomfortable at the podium talking to the press at times. Now would be a great time to tell you all that girls/women DO NOT WANT to DATE a mamma’s boy- EVER! We don’t want to have to have our relationship be interfered with due to him trying to please his mom over us. Also, we ain’t going to do all the mom shit for you either, in case you were wondering.

2) As I talk about dating, if you missed my podcast last week… The recordings of a fan girl #sarcasm I brought up the fact that when a guy/girl gets dumped they are the ones who go to gym to get a “new body” as a revenge to the person who dumped them. It’s not secret that Zach broke up with his girlfriend, Abbey. Well, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that after they broke up he started getting ripped.
Here’s the picture of him now:

Of course most of the Jets fans are making a big deal of this but seriously, the only reason he looks like this is because his girlfriend broke up with him. She stills looks the same FYI. AND whenever ANYONE says that the break up was “mutual,” trust me, it wasn’t. One party decided that they wanted to break up, and the other party just went along with it. The worse thing to EVER do is to go back to an Ex. Seriously, they call them ex’s for a reason.

One more thing about NFL players and seeing these guys do these intense diets and workouts. If you notice about the NFL 15 years ago, guys weren’t obsessed the same way they are now. And if you notice, guys 15 years ago didn’t get hurt as much as they do now simply because they did not fuel their bodies with only protein, which is the worst thing to do! I have a client who has a protein diet and with that diet they are told NOT to workout that much. Yes, you read that correctly. These guys work out like I have never seen, out all these protein / whey powders in their bodies… and then get hurt. Seriously, it is something to think about since their careers are not a given when it comes to injuries. Finally, let me say this about NFL players “claiming” that they treat their bodies like a temple. If that were true, they wouldn’t use tinder or any other dating app, and put STD’s in their bodies by having unprotected one night stands. And even with a condom… why would you waste that energy on someone who doesn’t matter to you and who isn’t meant to be in your life? If you gonna use Twitter to preach it, y’all better be living it.

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Mistakes NFL Teams Make When Drafting A QB

With the NFL Draft about 43 days away, you can bet that there will be some quarterbacks that will be drafted on day one. It’s definitely exciting when a team drafts a QB – simply because it is a brand new start for your team/ organization. Looking back as to some quarterbacks that have been drafted in year’s past; it is definitely smart to say that teams make mistakes when they draft a quarterback.

1- If I was an offensive coordinator in the NFL and I drafted a QB, I am making sure that I pay a visit to his college head coach to learn his playbook and the schemes that I can then use in the NFL to have my new QB ready as a rookie. So many teams ignore the college playbook and have the quarterback start from scratch with a completely new offense his first year.

2- Some NFL teams appear to be making an obvious mistake by taking quarterbacks who have good physical traits — like size, speed, and arm strength — but who struggle with the mental and mechanical skills — like accuracy, reading defenses, and making sound decisions when it comes to throwing the football.

3- Scouting is an inexact science; which means that experts disagree on the seemingly simple question of whether or not a quarterback is accurate. The decision to draft any player begins with the decision to have a scout evaluate that player in college. But the methods used for quarterbacks haven’t changed much in the past thirty to forty years, even as the NFL has changed drastically. This means that when a scout is sent to evaluate a quarterback, they mostly emphasize height, weight, and speed. Teams assume they can fix any mental problems and throwing mechanics to a greater extent than is possible.

4- There is a HUGE drop off in stats from college to the pros. Fans mostly see how a QB played in college and think those stats will occur in the NFL. The factors that are never considered as to how a QB coming out of college will play in the NFL are the offensive line play, production of receivers, opposing defenses, or coaches. People tend to forget that a quarterback needs to be developed in the NFL. College and the Pros are two different beasts and each player has their ow timeline as to when they will be “fully developed.” It’s also important to note, that the above, ( Offensive line play, talent of the receivers, and coaching play a big part in how well the drafted quarterback will play in the NFL.)

Coming on Friday, I will start the blog / podcast part of “Playing With The Boys” and breakdown Zach Wilson. ( There will be a video posted too)

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Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Is He or Isn’t He?

There are things that guys do on Instagram that show you up front that they are players and not legit meaning the guys you need to STAY AWAY from. ( Sadly, most of them NOT all of them are athletes, ya know, because they think they are superior to everyone else. )

  1. He won’t follow you on Instagram – This is a classic sign by the way. And the reason being is pretty much simply that he’s hiding a relationship, and wants women to think he is available when he is not. It’s classic because guys who are proud of the woman they have will show her off to their followers. Guys who want to let other guys know – she’s mine; she’s taken. If a guy doesn’t want you to be be his follower on IG, then he is simply hiding something he doesn’t want to see… and to top that off, ANYONE that still has a private account is surely hiding shit.
  2. He is a bikini account troll – He follows EVERY girl that his posing in her bikini, it doesn’t matter if she is a supermodel, an influencer, or the girl that leaves next door to him. He doesn’t want you to see that, hence why he hasn’t followed you nor wants you to follow you. By the way, most quarterbacks/athletes in the NFL do this and when they do it’s a sign that they are the most superficial guys on the planet. Any guy that ONLY focuses on a woman’s looks and that’s it, isn’t a guy you want to date let alone stand next too.
  3. Now, let’s change gears and let me tell guys how to understand if a woman is interested in you and also a word of wise to the ladies out here too! First, to the ladies: if you are interested in a guy it’s OKAY to pay attention to them, it’s OKAY to treat them like you feel a special connection to them because out brains are more psychologically primed to like people who like us. Don’t though only focus on him and him only. The reason being is that when you focus on more than one guy, the guy that is truly attracted to you, will lock you up and not want you to pay so much attention to other guys, Yes, jealously here is what makes guys realize that he wants you and therefore he will invite you to follow him on IG, he will post about you so every guy knows hands off, she’s mine. So guys, if a woman is paying attention to you it’s because she sees the best in you and wants you to connect with you. Again the brain does unconsciously attract others who share similar interests in. Instead of ignoring her and playing the stupid mind games, reciprocate back, have conversations, after all, conversation is the heart and soul of Instagram and social media in general. It’s okay to talk to folks who aren’t in your circle ( circles don’t have corners) – it also widens your horizons when it comes to learning and growing as a person. You never know what you can learn about someone when you take the time to have a conversation with them.
Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Sex, Relationships and The NFL

Being that Friday’s episode of “The Recordings of Fan Girl #Sarcasm” will be about this “lovely” topic of conversation I thought, hey, since I am not doing my regular podcast , Sassy Nation tomorrow, let me divulge you all for a moment.

If you bought my best seller, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid? 2nd Ed” or the follow up, “Relationship Impossible” you read a couple of things:

Online dating is often touted as the solution to dating frustration. You only have to deal with people who meet your standards. Which really, can’t happen because of choice overload. (Too many options for any one person to handle.) All we have are our words and our photos online. Whereas in person we have hundreds of thousands of verbal and non-verbal clues to give us an intuitive grasp of who we’re talking to and whether or not we’re into them long before we go up and introduce ourselves.

There are many NFL players as I have mentioned that use Tinder and other dating apps to meet up with their “hook up” for the night. As I will mention in the podcast on Friday, you have many players that tend to think they are celebrities, act as if they are better than the average person, and then give in the pressures of this “life” to date a “model-type” girl because, let’s face it, they are very superficial. Now, it’s important for me to mention NOT EVERY NFL player does this- there are some that have morals, values, and are just great down-to-Earth guys. But, I ain’t talking about those guys here. I am talking about the guys that treat women as if they are sex-objects and then complain on social media that they are “gold-diggers” when they created the bandwagon themselves.

Some NFL players have created this image of this “ideal” woman, so when regular women; regular, wonderful, real women fall short, they reject them. That way they never
have to settle down and then everyone can still feel sorry about poor, lonely you.
And they have NO idea just what BAD position they end up putting themselves when they A) use a dating app for a 1 night stand and B) when they buy a girl their attention.

As you will see, online dating isn’t what you think it is anymore. Yes, you may have stories of people who know someone who has met online, but that doesn’t mean that it actually works. What that means is that, that person you know just was lucky enough to meet someone with whom they think they click with. It doesn’t mean that the relationship is going to last either. All it means is that after searching online, that person decided to settle down with someone. With STD’s up 75% and sex offenders using dating sites at an all-time high, if you really want to meet someone, stop putting forth the effort online, and actually go out there and meet people. Network, volunteer, join a church group, go to a coffee shop, sporting event, etc. The point being is, the more you take yourself into real, actual situations, the better chance you have at actually meeting, “ the one.”

The first thing you see online is someone’s profile picture and dating profile. Not only can they post fake pictures, there have been people who post pictures of what they looked like five years ago! They also can tell you they love life when in fact they complain about just about everything. When you meet someone in person, they can’t pretend they don’t really look like that. There’s no fake picture or who they truly are. You can’t read body language through the computer.

Any site that “claims” to be able to match you to your perfect mate if you fill out all 60 questions, is a hoax. There is NO scientific evidence that backs up these algorithms. If they claim that their scientific algorithms work, why do you need to spend 9 -12 months to find someone with whom you should totally click with right away?

When it comes to love it seems we are at the mercy of our biochemistry. First there is a lust, then an attraction, then love. If we get down to the science, attraction happens in the first 30 seconds. You can’t do that online. Dating online is totally different. Two Words: Choice Overload. Not only are there way too many people on these sites, but you would have to have gone out on 100 dates before you actually have chosen your “perfect match.” Now seriously who has time to not only read through all those profiles, but who has actually gone out with 100 people they have met online?

When you go on a search for love, you are looking to settle. But when you let love find you and unexpectedly, you find the person who is meant for you. Online dating is good for one thing, banging and the quick fix while going out and meeting people the traditional way is for those who want the real thing and refuse to settle. You have to show people you are emotionally available to connect and online you can’t feel or see that connection at all. Not only do you connect emotionally faster in person, but pheromones are known to be involved in sexual attraction and during the most fertile time in her menstrual cycle, a woman gives off a different scent which may make her more attractive to potential male suitors. How can you do that online?

We use Yelp to check which restaurant to go to. Pick movies using another app. We are so anxious to control the outcomes that we are unable to take any real risks. We don’t see Andrew or Andrea as people on dating sites, we see Andrew or Andrea, the 70% perfect match. We don’t see them as people, we see them as objects.

A study found that positive personality traits actually increase perceived facial attractiveness. So if you are just basing your choice on looks, you maybe choosing in correctly. When you find someone to date traditionally, you already can see or get a glimpse of that person’s personality while online you are only going by what they are telling you.

When you meet people traditionally, you typically see them in a social context, such as how they interact with workmates, friends and family members. Online is made of words and images.

Researchers estimate that 25% of rapists found people to assault through online dating services and being scammed in person is less likely than online. Online dating is great if you want a casual fling, but not for anything longer lasting because there are so many dishonest people seeking cheap thrills. If a situation arises, you can split fast and a click here or there, you have your next fling. Marriage is down 50% because everyone is falling for the, “Your perfect match can be found on this website,” crap. All that time you “try” and get to know someone online, you could be actually physically getting to know someone you met in person.

With the discussion on dating, it’s not just about love, marriage and then the baby carriage. It’s about finding someone with whom you can foresee yourself spending the rest of your life with, sharing visions and dreams, as well as the possibility for raising up children together. It should not be about finding the “perfect” partner, because there is no such thing. Instead it should be about finding someone who knows that they are lucky to have you. Relationships are a full time job, don’t apply if you aren’t ready.

Most don’t even know HOW the apps actually work:

For example, eHarmony’s system is flawed because it relies on conclusions from married couples and a fundamental premise that similar people will be happy together in the long-term. But married couples often project similarities onto one another and adopt similar interests over time, so those are the results of a relationship rather than what inspires them in the first place. As for Match.com and other dating apps, they gather information like hobbies and interests the same way that Netflix does. They do not gather any information that is related to what will make a user happy in a relationship.

Tinder and Hinge work differently. Essentially, Tinder used an Elo rating system, which is the same method used to calculate the skill levels of chess players: You rose in the ranks based on how many people swiped right on (“liked”) you, but that was weighted based on who the swiper was. The more right swipes that person had, the more their right swipe on you meant for your score. Finally, when there was enough people on Tinder and Hinge, the AL based solely on the ways users select many of the same profiles as other users who are similar to them, and the way one user’s behavior can predict another’s, without ranking people in an explicitly competitive way. So, the longer you’re on an app, the worse the options get. You’ll see Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, PlentyofFish, they all do recycling of people with whom you already said NO to.

This means that people may unknowingly skip over potential mates for the wrong reasons. The person you see on paper doesn’t translate neatly to a real, live human being, and there’s no predicting or accounting for the chemistry you might feel with a person whose online profile was the opposite of what you thought you wanted. Offline, that kind of attraction would spark organically.

Take a close look on Instagram and you will get a sense of which girls have created a “fake persona,” to gather attention, while the real, down to Earth girls show their
true character online. For a relationship to stay you need character. Personality is a superficial connect, whereas with character, you look for connection. So for a long term relationship, there has to be a shift from a superficial level to a deeper level –

You don’t need the internet for that.

We will discuss Friday: CLICK HERE FOR THE PODCAST

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

The Recordings Of A Fangirl #sarcasm

I hate the term “Fangirl.”

I also hate it when girls are called groupies or for those girls who love hockey, they are called “puckbunnies.”

It’s not a compliment.

So “Fangirl” or “fangirling” is not, in and of itself a sexist term. Nor does a man using it guarantee it is meant as anything other than a description. Can it be sexist? Sure. It can be meant dismissively or as a slur. I’ve seen women trash talk “fanboys” as well.

Intent is definitely the main part of the equation. If a guy looks at a panel room, a bar full of girls watching a game and shakes his head while muttering “fangirls” …yeah, he’s probably being sexist.

I always feel the need to defend myself when that term is used to pigeon-hole me. Why? Haven’t you heard? Fangirls are crazy, obsessive, desperate, shallow, hysterical females, who only care about the attractiveness of the athletes in question. What would they know about sports?

I have developed a podcast called, “The Recordings Of A Fangirl #Sarcasm” to talk about girlie things, sports, dating, athletes, and my usual sassy rants are part of it. These will be a bonus if you subscribe to my podcast “Sassy Nation”

Here are the links:

The latest podcast: CLICK HERE

The 1st episode of The Recordings of A Fangirl #Sarcasm: CLICK HERE

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Sassy Nation Podcast

Each week I have a new episode- This week’s topics

On Sassy Nation #podcast

– Lebron James and his ignorant following

– Stop allowing the media to categorize people

-An inside look to my upcoming book, Relationship Impossible – And more ( Knicks won 7 in a row!)

#socialmedia

#nba


Click Here to Listen

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Football For Dummies ( AKA The Jets Fans)

If there is one group of football fans that surely know how to make me want to vomit, it’s the NY Jets Fans. They head over to social media, mostly Twitter and Facebook, where they boast about their own team losing in hopes of the number pick. I read the guys tweets. I read the guys posts. And then I either want to throw up or bang my head against the wall; it’s a toss up, really.

This fan base is one of the most fickle fan bases I have ever seen. They get all excited when they draft guys they “think” are going to muster up to the expectations and boo the draft picks that actually become great NFL players for other teams, since they dump them quickly. This organization has looked like it has no idea what it has been doing since the last time they won a Superbowl which was 1969. We have seen this organization embarrass itself in more ways than one. There were moments like, Jets legend Joe Namath made a fool of himself (and the franchise) on Dec. 20, 2003 when he drunkenly told ESPN’s Suzy Kolber, “I want to kiss you, I could care less about the team struggling” during a sideline interview. There was Bill Belichick announcing he was resigning as head coach of the New York Jets by writing a note on a napkin. During a game in December 2010, then-Jets strength and conditioning coach Sal Alosi intentionally tripped Dolphins punt returner Nolan Carroll along the sideline. Not a great look, really. The Jets suffered a brutal loss to the Dolphins on November 27, 1994, thanks to Dan Marino’s “Clock Play.” In 2015, former Jets quarterback and first-round pick Geno Smith was punched in the face by teammate IK Enemkpali over $600. I mean, I seriously can go on…. and on. But nothing can top those things than seeing the fan base root AGAINST their OWN team and giving up so soon on players developing.

For all the fans that seem to think they know everything here is a little football lesson between college football and the NFL.

First of all the preparation and dedication to the game must be absolute in order to sustain success for a long period of time in the NFL. This is probably the most crucial difference between college and the pros.

The best professional football players learn how to dissect the game and their opponents long before they take the field. College athletes never have the luxury of going so in-depth. So, essentially everyone in college is on a relatively even playing field in terms of preparation.

College football is equalized in preparation opportunity, while the NFL is generally more equalized in physical ability. Guys in the league quickly realize they can no longer rely solely on their physical gifts to be dominant.

The width of the fields are not the same thing. This is the granddaddy issue, and one people never think about. Yes, in a literal sense, pro and college fields are the same width (53 1/3 yards). But in a strategic sense, they’re wildly different. Hashmarks dictate where the ball is spotted. In the NFL, they’re 18 feet, 6 inches apart. In college, they’re 40 feet apart. This means the pro game always begins near the middle of the field, with relatively equal spacing on both sides. That makes for a crisp, tight game, with (initially) balanced formations and coverages.

It’s difficult to compare coaches in college to coaches in the NFL. They are similar yet completely different at the same time. There are a lot of things to take into account when comparing the two – they might be coaching the same sport, but each is an entirely separate world with unique challenges-

Remember, Trevor Lawrence isn’t coming to the NFL with his QB coach, his head coach, his OL, or his WRs. He also needs to learn a completely new offense and gain chemistry with an entire new OL and with his WRs.

Let me remind of you of the TOP QB prospects that NEVER made it in the NFL:

1) Jason White
2) Graham Harrell
3) Johnny Manziel
4) Ryan Leaf
5) Kellen Moore
6) Colt McCoy ( he’s the back up for the Giants- but he never made it as a franchise QB)
7) Case Keenum
8) Eric Crouch

The point being, just because all the “experts” say that Trevor Lawrence is amazing, doesn’t mean that it will translate to the NFL. Remember they have been wrong MANY times before.

Also, Andrew Luck was deemed, the most elite QB since Peyton Manning. He NEVER won a Super Bowl.

You are hoping that “maybe” Trevor will live up to all the hype, while giving up on Sam who definitely has what it takes to be a Franchise QB. Jets fans gave up on Leonard Williams, look at him with the Giants this year – he has 39 tackles and 8.5 sacks so far.
Look at Quentin Williams , you all thought he was trash last year – my point is that fans give up too soon on players and expect that they are going to be perfect the minute they step on the NFL field. Sam Darnold has never had a complete team BUILT around him. Now is the time to do this and build around the small core of players that the team has! He also needs a QB coach that is not going to let him make the same mistakes, and also a coach that is going to highlight his strengths.


Investing in your franchise QB is a business move and if they decide they don’t want to pay him just for that reason alone, then they are not investing in winning. They are in the business of winning and you can’t win if you keep dumping your draft picks 2/3 years later and “start over”, or as Jets fans like to constantly say, “Start Fresh”

You all will look FOOLISH if by chance Joe Douglas does trade Sam and he succeeds somewhere else and Trevor Lawrence doesn’t look so perfect anymore out of that Clemson jersey.

So be careful what you wish for.

Putting your eggs into one basket never works out in your favor.

Ever.