The book that everybody has been waiting for is finally arriving on your shelf soon .
more to come!
Just Gonna Leave This Here
2025: Unrealistic Body Image Finally Enters The Chat
We live in a culture that praises weight loss. The message we’re sending is that you only look good because you lost weight.
Fat phobia- because of our intent, we perpetuate diet culture, and fat phobia when we compliment someone on their smaller body. Our society praises weight loss as if it’s the best thing a person could ever do. Not only that, but we comment on people’s bodies without having any idea what is going on in their lives.
Last week Jennifer Love Hewitt made more women in their 40s so happy that someone in Hollywood actually looks like them. She didn’t run off to use ozempic and she didn’t go ahead and do a crazy-ass diet. She is what women are SUPPOSED to look like and she was so proud of her body!
We “assume” that their weight loss is “positive”, when it could be due to a chronic illness or an eating disorder. All unsolicited comments about someone’s body are bad and shouldn’t be praised because no one asked for them. Even if someone asks, we shouldn’t even give them one when actually we should take it a step further and tell people that they don’t want to receive those comments.
We should be telling people to focus on who that person is not by what that person looks like. If only people did this on social media.
Social media is the perfect environment, unfortunately, where the diet culture flourishes. It thrives on comments from men who think they know that certain bodies are “better and hotter” than others. Yes, guys who are losing their hair, have beer bellies, droopy chests and butts, are telling women that they all need to look like a goddamn Barbie doll, when they themselves are so far away from representing Ken.
Women who already have suffered from a body image disorder, get triggered by those comments and now are drawn back into the diet culture. And for what? To please all the men who you don’t know on social media, who basically have their own insecurities about their own looks and projected on women?
The sad reality is, if you look on social media and even dating apps, all men want this fantasy woman who is 5 feet tall 5 inches, 130 pounds, size 2, blonde hair, and blue eyes, who accepts bare minimum, and who could pass for either a Victoria’s Secret model or a Barbie doll. What they don’t realize is that a woman’s looks is never going to raise their children. Her mindset will.
Men never focus on who a woman really is, speaking in terms of her personality, mentality, and character. But they only focus on how hot she looks so his teammates, and friends can be extremely jealous of his arm candy.
Oh, once you hit 35 and you’re a woman you’re old and decrepit according to social media.
If only men could stop being, “so full of themselves,” and stop trying to “fit in” focusing on loving a woman for who they truly are. But instead, they don’t want to embrace that main character energy. They wanna focus on what isn’t instead of what is.
I guess the question really is this : do we really want to spend our lives agonizing over trying to make others happy instead of making each day we live the best days we’ve ever had? When are we going to realize that nobody at your funeral is going to say the following: “ I remember so-and-so, she was a size 4 all her life, she was always so skinny, she was always looking hot and beautiful, etc”
They are going to remember how you made others feel, how you lived life and the kindness you showed others . That’s a life worth remembering.
Get Ready: A sneak peek of “Meet Me in the Penalty Box”
As you well know by following this blog and if you follow me on social, you know that I am writing a book called, “Meet Me In The Penalty Box,” which exposes the NHL culture to a tee. Here’s a excerpt of the book: the first two sections: All About The Victims and Exploring the Topic Of Culture
Did you know, in 2022, there were 1.37 million domestic violence crimes committed in the US. According to the CDC, in 2022, women reported intimate partner violence around 41%
These are topics that women try and avoid talking about because they are embarrassed to admit that they have been in an abusive relationship or they feel ashamed that they succumbed to a man who tricked them into believing that he loved her by abusing her.
What does all this have to do with the NHL? (National Hockey League)
The NHL is the ONLY major pro-sports league without a league specific policy outlining what happens to players who are accused of sexual crimes and domestic abuse.
There have been incidents within the league that the league have stayed quiet about and have swept it under the rug, so to speak. (I then get into many different cases)
The question that everyone seems to have in regards to violence against women is where does this start to form in a man’s life?
Why does he intentionally want to hurt someone who is seen as loving and caring towards him?
And how do women play a role in being manipulated into falling into a pattern of trusting violent men with their lives?
Dating Violence
Violence in teen relationships predicts violence in adulthood. In the United States, up to 19% of teens experience sexual or physical dating violence, about half face stalking or harassment, and as many as 65% report being psychologically abused ( Stats are from Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention)
In many cases, violence can happen when young people don’t yet have the skills to manage conflict, cope with feelings of jealousy, and navigate rejection. Many teens perceive this type of behavior as “normal” and a way to express love in intimate relationships.
The truth of the matter is this: Teen dating violence seems to be overlooked, not only in the scientific community but in society at large. It’s developmentally appropriate for young people to explore their sexuality.
But as a society we haven’t figured out how to support that while protecting them from a risk of violence. Added pressures today include social media and how sexuality is perceived.
According to 2019 data from the CDC’s Youth Risk Behavior Survey, about 1 in 12 teens experience physical dating violence and about the same number face sexual dating violence. Other studies suggest rates may be higher, especially when accounting for psychological forms of abuse.
In one nationally representative study of young people ages 14 to 21, 51% of females and 43% of males reported being victims of at least one type of dating violence, while 50% of females and 35% of males reported perpetrating at least one type.
Girls as young as age 6 have been taught for generations to accept the fact that when a boy pulls your hair, trips you, pokes you, laughs at you, or does anything else to you, this is a clue that he “likes you.”
Little girls have been conformed and trained to accept this behavior from boys as an expression of interest, which means we have been training girls that it is normal for guys to physically, mentally, and emotionally abuse us as an expression of love.
Teen boys who abuse dating partners are more than likely to have experienced child abuse or neglect. Teen boys who are abusers, are more likely to use alcohol or drugs than their nonviolent counterparts.
Teen boys who abuse their partners then to have sexist attitudes that support male domination over females.
In some cases, dating violence may be part of a pattern of antisocial or aggressive behavior.
But much of the time, teens may simply not know how to manage the emotions and conflicts that arise as they enter their first relationships.
Patterns in teen relationships are similar to adult battering relationships – they involve the same elements of control and jealousy. Teen girls and women describe the same range of violent experiences from slaps and shoves, to beatings and attacks with weapons.
There are several youth-specific aspects to their relationships-
Pressure to conform to peer-group norms which contributes to an emphasis on having a specific dating partner.
Peer pressure can be so intense and the fear of being different, or of violating peer-group norms, can create rigid conformity.
Teenage boys will begin to establish such patterns when their violent dating behaviors are reinforced by members of their peer group and by society as a whole.
Their expectations of a girlfriend may include that she gives up certain activities and other relationships in order to give priority to her boyfriend.
This is why basic chicks fit the mold/pattern for hockey players.
They find women who will conform to what the boyfriend wants and accepts their dominance in the relationship. This includes that he be sexually aggressive, make all the decisions, and he will control her activities and behavior…..
(Section 2: Exploring the Topic of Culture)
The United States also has an individualistic culture, meaning people place a high value on individuality and independence. In contrast, many other cultures are collectivist, meaning the welfare of the group and group relationships is a primary value.
Living up to a culture’s values can be difficult. It’s easy to value good health, but it’s hard to quit smoking. Marital monogamy is valued, but many spouses engage in infidelity. Cultural diversity and equal opportunities for all people are valued in the United States, yet the country’s highest political offices have been dominated by white men.
In many cultures, women are expected to be responsible for things that men are not. And, there are more pressures put on girls and women to look young and youthful no matter how old she is. Women’s full and equal participation in all facets of society is a fundamental human right. Yet, around the world, from politics to sports to the workplace, women and girls are largely underrepresented.
While the specific expectations have varied across cultures and time periods, core assumptions about women’s roles have persisted for millennia. Let’s take a brief look at how the values and beliefs women “should” follow enfolded…..
Today, this is how women see themselves:
- Independence focused
- Sexually liberated
- Work focused
Today this is how men still want to see women:
- Homemaker
- Mother
- Primary caregiver
- Submits to her man
- Adopts her man’s moral foundations
A traditional woman is a woman who follows older established principles of femininity. But today, women are pushing away from being a “traditional woman” because men today are pushing away from being, “a traditional man.”
What is a traditional man?
He is someone who adheres to conventional, often historical, gender roles and expectations. This may include traits like being a provider, protector, and head of the household, with a focus on strength, and dominance. Basically he follows established principles of masculinity.
Men before the social media era had more strength, courage, and discipline than today’s men. Men used to be better men, and more men wanted to be more like that. Today though, men rather complain about women being masculine and not feminine.
Maybe this is news to a lot of men but women take self-defense courses because we’re told we need to protect ourselves from men. Instead of men learning to be better men. The value of women is not limited to their sex appeal. Treat women the way you would treat any normal person. How you speak, walk, move your body or go about everyday life has nothing to do with masculinity, aside from other people’s preconceived ideas.
When most men think of “manliness”, they think of the fantastical archetypes we’ve been inundated with since childhood:
James Bond, Ernest Hemmingway, Captain America, and the list goes on.
They think that manliness is about hunting big game, or knowing how to fight, or sleeping with dozens of women, or driving a fast car. But these activities do not make one manly. Manliness, or as I prefer to call it “masculinity”, is about the principles by which you operate and the way that you commit yourself to various pursuits in life.
I would argue that developing your masculinity just as women develop their femininity, is based on a handful of simple principles…..
When women are assaulted, their past gets investigated.
When men assault, their future gets protected.
When women get assaulted, it’s like society treats them like a criminal first, not a victim. But men? Oh no, their futures need to be protected at all costs. The only thing that matters is making sure they get a “second chance” while she’s left fighting for her dignity. This victim-blaming crap isn’t just sick, it’s a systematic pile-on designed to keep her in the dirt while they get to walk away unscathed.
What does all this have to do with the NHL and their culture?
Well, let me start off by saying this: Culture isn’t an excuse for abuse. And abuse is silent no matter what type of abuse it is emotionally mental, physical or sexual.
And the fact that people know that it’s happening and they close the blind eye to it or they sweep it under the rug or they try to hide it as fast as they can, shows you the nature of this problem isn’t small. The NHL is very good at covering this up and that shows you that they know right from wrong but they don’t care.
And to all those guys that I see commenting on this type of thing on Instagram, Facebook and Threads is disturbing.
The main comment is that, we as women will never get rid of sexual assault. That’s that is correct statement because we’re never going to get rid of hate, we’re never going to get rid of violence 100%, but the fact that you don’t even want to think about how you can make things better for not just yourself but those around you, show that you are part of the problem, not the solution.
It’s always amazing to me. How guys are more worried about the accusations of their favorite athletes than the violence itself .
Defending them with the my favorite sayings, “she was a whore,” “She wanted it now she’s regretting it.” And my ultimate favorite, “Innocent until proven guilty.”
There’s also another one, “She consented so this didn’t happen.”
They just don’t understand what consent and not consent is and even if she consented in the beginning, a woman has a right to change her consent at any point given in time.
When a woman says no or stop or I don’t want to do this and you don’t listen to her, you are raping her. It doesn’t matter if she’s your wife, it doesn’t matter if she’s your girlfriend, it doesn’t matter if she’s your partner, it doesn’t matter if she’s a hooker from the street, it does not matter.
And that is where the problem then grows.
The hockey culture is four things, alcohol, drugs, sex and gambling.
(To Be Continued)
It’s a Waste Of Money To Shop At VS
If you are a woman, you probably have shopped or still shop at Victoria’s Secret. And if you are like me, you are tired of wasting money buying their panties that no longer seem to be made with good quality material. You buy it, wear it twice, and then have to throw it out because washing them has now made them shrink to the point where they are unwearable.
I was on the mission to find other sexy, lacy, cute and comfortable panties, and I think I did.
The brand that I found to be reasonably priced, comfortable, sexy and cute is Auden which is sold in Target.
The other brand is SO by Kohl’s as you will see in this video -> CIick here to watch it
“Where the skies meet the soul
Poetry is important because it allows individuals to express complex emotions creatively, connect with others through shared experiences, enhance language awareness by playing with words and imagery, ignite imagination, and deepen understanding of culture and history through its unique use of language and form.
I have been writing it for YEARS! Even won the Editor’s Award for writing poetry.
Here are 3 of my top poems that I would like to share- they describe feelings that I felt a while back and as someone told me, they are powerful. But then again, Words are powerful.
YOU MUST LOVE ME
I’m sorry that I’m an inconvenience to your so perfect unhappy life.
I should have thought twice before I let you in to play.
You might as well have raped me like a beast,
For I let you feast on me for free.
My innocence is gone.
I have nothing to believe.
Now instead you want me dead!
But honey, I’m already dead!
When you drained all of my happiness from me!
My stamina for life has stuttered, unwillingly.
Maybe this means that you must love me.
Should I celebrate in the joy,
That I was once your favorite toy?
Should I just forget about making amends?
And just return to the corner of your mind until you wish to play with me again?
You’re so pathetic, you ungrateful piece of crap!
Tell me, don’t you remember all the times when I had your back?
You think it’ll be so easy to pack up all the memories,
But you have no respect or concern for me and it shows.
You love the fact that you’ve made me miserable.
Because only you can become a hero and rescue me from destructing.
Go ahead, you might as well try to resuscitate my limp body,
And breathe new life into me.
Maybe this means that you must love me.
Should I rejoice, in your choice?
To break me down even more to the ground that I am?
Well my friend,
Here I go again;
Maybe my mind’s playing tricks.
I hope that is it.
Or maybe this means that you must love me.
DO WHAT I GOTTA DO
Its a shame that you don’t even have an open mind.
You see the love I found, you see that I’m happy,
But you still want to take me down.
I know what I want, I know what I need.
I’ll do what I gotta do. I’ll be me and you be you.
You see that he loves me and can’t understand why.
I’m not a waif or a princess and I ain’t mighty high.
I am just the girl who lives next door. And that makes you even more boiling with envy.
You think that you can get the last laugh,
And torture me with your mighty words.
You think you are about to put me in my place,
But you hide behind others and can’t even show your face.
You hatin’ hard tryin’ to get attention,
Honey, I can see right through you,
There’s no way to copy this girl, I’m an original.
Your jealousies
Give it up, save your breath,
You thought I would wave my flag,
You underestimated me.
I know what I want and I know what I need.
I’ll do what I gotta do.
I’ll be me and you be you.
I may be bent, but I ain’t broken.
Trust me, my final words have yet to be spoken.
You’re about to see me in your dreams tonight.
It will give you quite the fright.
It may make you lose your mind.
Trust me, karma ain’t gonna be kind.
You messed with the wrong girl,
Now I’m about to give your world quite a twirl.
I’m strong and I’m a fighter,
And all you are a one good stinkin’ liar.
I know what I want and I know what I need.
I’ll do what I gotta do.
I’ll be me and you be you.
Skin
I do my best with soap and water.
I even scrub under my nails.
But it does no good when you are in my system.
You are a germ that just won’t go away.
You are in every inch of my skin.
Okay, you win!
So I have no choice,
There’s no reason to fight.
So I guess it’s destiny saying,
You should be part of my life.
But first,
I think you should remove the knife,
You carelessly placed in my side.
But all you care about is your pride.
You know that I can’t fight the feelings I have for you,
But yet, you won’t do anything about it.
Except all you do is keep me hanging on,
Wondering when you will take that first step.
Honey, I understand that you have a rep,
But please, quit acting so boyish.
Be a man, become my man,
Tonight.
You are in every inch of my skin,
For that you may think that you already win.
But I have ideas that creep inside my head.
Actually, this germ I have will one day spread,
Into your body, mind and soul.
It will haunt you.
It will taunt you.
And after it does everything to you the same as it has done to me,
You’ll see,
No soap or water will be ever able to get rid of me.
The Silent Women Part 2
Jacob Trouba ( a fake account set up on this platform)
“LOL which player rejected you?? There is no problem with women who are in relationships with NHL players; dating, married, or otherwise. The NHL is definitely NOT against women. The problem is you and your unhinged and attitude. If you feel that the NHL is against women like you, then rightfully so!!!”
Oh look I triggered you – Oh snap ( insert eye roll here and smirk)
See, the problem is NOT my unhinged attitude its the fact that these men can’t DEAL WITH IT because it is THE TRUTH. And this is a CLASSIC narcissist gaslighting response. Also, it seems as though this male is unhinged because he wants women to accept the status quo and not be better and do better. He probably also thinks it is a flex to sleep with multiple women too.
Obviously this dude also doesn’t know HOW to read. I never said there was a problem WITH women… I said clearly that the CULTURE and The TYPE of woman they are groomed to be with is the problem. DUH!
Guys do not want to become better men, so that’s why they settle for the basic chick because they’re not going to force them to be better.
And it’s not just the men who play in the NHL it’s men who are fans of the NHL.
That whole entire topic of would women choose the bear over a man in the woods, triggered so many men, but it just didn’t trigger men. It triggered the boys who are insecure and immature, and probably will never be men.
But back to the NHL for a second …
You can listen to the podcast. I just did on this topic here. * click to listen *
And if you would like to read the books that are written on men in relationships…
You can click here … I’m sure you’ll find what you need to find in the books.
But just to continue for a second ..
I mentioned in the last post about Instagram and the stories and how all these NHL players use them. . I did not mention why it’s terrible and what exactly it means when a man does that shit. But I will start with this if you’re a woman and you are dating an NHL player do not be the first to post him up. Let him be the first to post you up. Because then you’ll know that you’re dealing with the athlete that is proud to have you as his woman and he would like to show you off to everyone else if he only puts you up in his story he’s still trying to look single.
If you go look at Cale Maker, Andrew Copp, Connor McDavid, Matthew Tkachuk, Ryan Lindgren, Jacob Trouba , etc… you will find on their actual pages, there is no such thing as they are/were actually dating a woman let alone being married to them. And then they’ll just say well my life is private, blah blah blah…. It’s not that their life is private. It’s that they’re 1) not proud of the woman they’re with because 2) she’s a basic chick and 3) it’s a secret so they can hook up using Tinder and other means especially when they’re on the road.
I mean, let’s look carefully at Connor McDavid, who was filmed on video in 2022 coming out of a bar with another woman not Laura who we ended up marrying . BTW…. If you look at their wedding photo there, there’s a specific one where they look like they’re unhappy. She knew that he’s a cheater and a liar and yet she still married him.
There’s a saying, a person who settles for crumbs, never understood the mentality of someone who wants the whole cake. Men want their cake and eat it too, but the women are not allowed to have that today. The women shouldn’t want the whole cake. They should just settle for crumbs and be happy.
Here’s something that I spoke about on the podcast if you are a woman and you give up your financial freedom to a man you’re pretty much done. If all women wanna do is just live off, their husband’s means and have nothing to fall back on, that’s the reason why most these women stay in abusive relationships. Well that and the fact that only 10% of those women that leave survive.
A smart man realizes it’s better to grow with a smart woman because he’s never satisfied with his basic chick and that’s why you don’t see more of those smart men who play in the national hockey league with intelligent women. They don’t accept bare minimum simple because they can provide bare minimum for themselves . We don’t need men men need us. If a man can manipulate you into making you believe he loves you you’re done hence that’s why they choose basic chicks, most likely under the age of 26.
And BTW… there are a lot of married single moms in the NHL. Those who do EVERYTHING on their own and the men don’t do shit. I talk more on the podcast about this.
Men are intimidated by intelligent women. They are inferior to them, but women who gave blow jobs just to get ahead are the women men can control and that’s why hockey players choose basic chicks because they will accept the bare minimum and are easily controlled.
If you look back through the history of the NHL and I mean way back, coaches used to sleep with other coaches wives players used to sleep with other players wives …. This type of culture starts in junior hockey.
Also, last year there was a scenario on TikTok with the NHL player Alex Wennberg . A lot of fantasy writers use the NHL players and sexualize the players themselves. Hence we had something called booktok. And the funny thing about it is the fact that the admin for the Seattle Kraken bought into it and used it in their social media.
If you look on TikTok, a lot of women sexualize the warm-up routine that a lot of NHL players do. (Its mostly certain type of stretching) But those women to me are not true hockey fans those women are the thirsty hoes. Yes I said what I said. You are a thirsty hoe, if you are sexualizing what hockey players are doing in warm up. It’s perfectly fine to say a guy a hot, good looking, dresses sharp, etc. BUT when you sexualize them, then you are saying the way that THEY treat women is acceptable.
I want women to want to better themselves and I want that for their daughters too.
Like I’ve seen before I have no problem if you wanna be a stay at home mom and live off your husband‘s means, but that means you’re giving up your financial freedom to your man. That means that no matter if he physically abuses you, emotionally abuses, you, or mentally abuses you You will end up staying in that relationship and teaching your daughter that there are no ways out and that you’re not worth it.
Women need to realize that they’re worth it!
Calling me unhinged just means I’m doing something right because it’s an unhinged attitude that men don’t appreciate and don’t like because I’ve said it before I’ll say it again they don’t want to better themselves. They want to be IN control of everything, especially a woman. They want women to be submissive to them and their needs and their wants . And the only way they can do that is if they pick a basic chick who accepts bare minimum.
By the way, on the podcast, I pick apart some of the New York Rangers wives and girlfriends and tell you some of the things that I see on their social compared to the things that their husbands and boyfriends post. I also get into this a little bit deeper on the podcast. It’s a great listen. I suggest you listen to it. Tell you, it’s a lot easier talking about it than it is writing it. So you’ll get some really good stuff on that podcast.
Again, here’s the podcast link : click here
The Silent Women Of The NHL
All last month I saw the NHL Public Relations Dept tweet out, “The NHL continues to celebrate Women in hockey…” and all I could think was, “What a load of crap!”
Why you ask?
Because it is a ploy to make you think that they 1) care about women at all and 2) a distraction from knowing or even thinking that the NHL is the ONLY professional league that does not have written policy to protect women in regard to sexual assault / domestic violence / sexual harassment – but no, let’s get the confetti and celebrate them! (Insert eye roll here) Not only that, but the women also that are in the NHL now, as wives and girlfriends are silent. Do you notice that? Do you notice that when you do have a woman who is married (or used to be married) speak up that woman is forced to stay silent and if they shall open their mouths, they are given, “The Scarlet Letter?”
As you will notice from some of these photos of the some of the women, they look literally identical. I sent a few people a photo of these two women, one is a GF and the other is about to marry a player on the SAME team. And the response I received were al the same, “They are sisters, right?” Ha! Nope. They are NOT related.
Here’s something interesting and I know it is going to rub some folks the wrong way but when the hell did that stop me? If you notice that almost all the women who are either dating or married to NHL players look alike. Now, the ones who are not the same “type” are the ones that knew their athlete when they were young and probably met in school or while they were in the AHL or even possibly out in the wide world. Those women are the women who aren’t in the mold they are “supposed to be” while the women who all look alike, are that for a simple reason or two: Its to keep the hockey culture alive and well and it is also easier to control a chick who is basic and practically the same than it is to control a woman who is different and extra. Some of the basic chicks don’t even realize this, but that NHL player ain’t with you because he “loves you and wants to build with you,” but because you are basic and easy to control. You will put up with his bullshit and NEVER say anything that goes against the grain.
Sorry but not sorry, that is the culture in a heartbeat.
Let’s talk about that for a second.
Think about how uniformed the military is for a minute. Everyone looks alike, everyone sounds alike, and everyone stays in line. What happens when you get out of line? If you break violations, there are consequences.
Think about Boston Bruins Wags for a minute ( Wags stands for Wives and girlfriends) The wife of Lucic suffered domestic violence and filed an assault charge but “miraculously” it was dropped back in February of this year because his agent and the team made it difficult for her to testify and the charges were dropped. But think about the WAGS whose job it is to ONLY smile, look pretty and be happy all the time.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN FROM THAT WAG GROUP SAID A DAMN THING ABOUT THIS.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN THAT WORKS WITHIN THE BRUINS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.
GARY BETMANN THE COMMISSONER DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP AND SAY THAT ASSAULT OF ANY KIND IS NOT TOLERATED IN THE NHL.
Why? Simple. It’s part of the NHL culture and it’s acceptable. So that is why the players go for basic chicks. A basic chick is EASY to control. A basic chick will not shake things up or cause a stir. A basic chick will not stand up for the other women in fear that they too can be assaulted or abused in any way. And of course, the guys will tell them to keep quiet because THEY DON’T WANT TO BE OSTRACIZED BY THE REST OF THE GUYS because “his woman” opened her mouth.
Think about Anna Kane for a minute. Everyone calls her “crazy” simply because she opened her mouth about domestic violence and how her daughter was taken away from her. The fact is, she is not crazy, what is crazy is that the truth she speaks triggers all those who want to live in this fake sexist world that is the NHL.
She needs to keep speaking her truth!
Something that I noticed from a NY Rangers wife on IG is the fact that she is AMAZING and she tries to have businesses and do things that make her happy outside of her husband’s hockey world. Every time she posts something where she goes off and does something amazing that she wanted to do she thanks her husband for, “Allowing me to be able to do it.” Um, excuse me? He “allowed” you do it? What are you, his slave? She should be allowed to do WHATEVER the fuck she wants to do. She is smart, beautiful and talented. She should not feel the need to thank him at all unless she is thanking him for support.
Another thing I noticed this past February. Jacob Trouba donated or painted some shit for Epilepsy NYC – His wife is a fucking doctor, and she is the photo you see below. The NHL public relations did NOT only MENTION her in the post, but didn’t even TAG HER! She knows MORE about Epilepsy than does the NHL and her husband Jacob! The reason is CLEAR why they didn’t mention her, it GOES AGAINST what the CULTURE is… and the sexism and misogyny at an ALL TIME HIGH!
And I won’t stop there. Sometimes these players pass around the SAME girl as they are appetizers. There is a guy on the Sharks that is married to a basic chick who dated another dude from a another team.
So before I continue let me qualify what a basic chick is or accepts for that matter. A basic chick accepts bare minimum at most. That’s it. Like I have said, they put up with the dudes bullshit. They never correct him, they are never supported publicly on social media or posted up, they never do anything else or demand to be treated better. They just accept basic treatment. The ones who are posted up are in a real relationship for the right reasons, the ones who aren’t, well, like I said, are only with him for the reasons that she is easy and breezy like I say below.
Why do you think I never “made it” dating an NHL player? Because I am extra and I am not going to sit there and let shit happen to the sisterhood that would be the WAGS. No way. I on the other hand, refuse to be tamed or groomed a certain way to “fit into the hockey culture”.
If you know me, you know that I protect all the people who are close to me. (Which isn’t that many but if you are in my circle, you are important to me.) I would though, as I have been told, would make an awesome hockey girlfriend, since I know the game inside out. I am a former cheerleader/ coach and I still work in the cheer industry so I know a thing or two about support and spreading positivity.
Now, I have NOTHING against a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom and just live off her husband’s means, if that is what she chooses to do. If a woman doesn’t want to better herself, that’s her prerogative. But I am saying here is the NHL doesn’t give women that option. You don’t see any woman who is married to a hockey player, who is a legend in her own right. For that matter you don’t even see hockey players on social media showing off their women like they’re proud of them, instead they hide them.
Did you know that 2 stars got married this year? Maker and Copp. But if you looked at their social media you wouldn’t even know that they were dating someone and the answer you get from guys as to why they hide their women from their social is a copout: “My life is private.” Yo, dude, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between people KNOWING you are with someone and KEEPING that person a SECRET. And oh, By the way, A NY Rangers player or two does the SAME SHIT! These women are posting up them in their stories (which is literally a story for another day) and not posting on their feed about the “love of their lives”
And then there is this: These women are afraid to speak up about ANYTHING.
Last year, a NY Rangers had a player whose wife needed In vitro fertilization. That must not have been an easy road, but she did it and had a precious son. She could have been a spokesperson, a representative for all women who struggle. She had the platform to do that. But all she did was an IG story, and that was it. Was she afraid to speak up? Was she told to keep that on the down low?
Women or the WAGS don’t speak up about ANYTHING! They are the silent women of the NHL. They are JUST there to LOOK pretty when they can bring SO much more to the table.
The rest of the women who work in the league also work in silence. Imagine working for Gary Betmann who has two daughters and needs to “stay in line” so she can keep her job, which by the way, is rare for a woman to be working in this league in the first place since 36% of women work in the male dominant sport.
If you are a guy and you are the one saying, “Well, why don’t these women just come forward?” Here’s my answer for you to digest. When women come forward you men, DON’T support them instead you QUESTION and ACCUSE the VICTIM of what she is saying because OH My God, he’s your “favorite’ athlete. If women told you they were attacked by a wild animal you would believe them, no strings attached, but when a women tells you that they are attacked by a man, you question it. The worst is when you say they are “just thirsty, or they wanted that,” Um, not every woman is after a man for his money and I don’t give a flying fuck what the girl is wearing, no girl is asking for it. Also, you guys think it’s a flex to hook up with many chicks and be with “really pretty girls” that is not a flex, that just shows how immature and unstable you guys really are.
Also, I will not validate my feelings on social. I am sorry if this triggers you but if it does, oh well.
If you planned on commenting or a woman dating/married to an NHLer says “We aren’t forced to be silent we just don’t want to distract him or the team… blah blah blah…” I call BS. It’s not that you are forced NOT to open your mouth, it’s that you are scared as shit to open your mouth with fear. And that is wrong.
The NHL culture is AGAINST women. If it weren’t the commissioner would not be against creating a written policy to protect women and their partners.
Sexism is ingrained in the NHL culture as it is to socialize young males with masculine ideals. The process encourages young guys to embody certain traits such as sexism and misogyny and they are subjected to policing tactics that ensure that EVERY SINGLE NHL PLAYER adopts this way of life.
The best the NHL could do is come up with a dumbass slogan, “Hockey is for everyone” is a load of crap, whereas we are talking about sexuality, sexism, and bullying. By the way, Canada is so grossly engaged in the culture of hockey, that is drives that Country’s funding and sport policies.
If current player’s voices are needed and yet they will not recognize how they have objectification of girls and women, how can sexism and misogyny ever be challenged and changed?
Today, you see so many NHL players publicly revealing their struggles with addictions, is connected to this NHL culture that HAS TO CHANGE. Also, what is connected to this culture is the fact that the players are with hyper masculine ideals and that they are not manly if they don’t play through an injury. It bears to also note that the challenge within the hockey culture is that the culture is intentional. The guys struggle for what it means to recognize such behaviors. There is no room for a view of what it means to be otherwise; you are either part of the culture or you are shun from ever making it in the league. There can be NO player who is bigger than the league itself. And when there is, he is not treated well. If the NHL really wanted to celebrate women as women SHOULD BE celebrated, then this culture of having women be a carbon copy of another woman should not be a “thing” in 2024. EVERY woman is special in her own right. EVERY woman deserves respect, appreciation and love for what THEY bring to the table AND not TOLD what to bring to the table.
Why do men of the NHL want woman to bring the exact same thing to the table? What the hell are they so freaking afraid of?
And as I type this, I can guarantee you that behind closed doors some of the women of the NHL are abused and assaulted. If there is one thing, I have learned about watching hockey for as long as I have it’s this: I can pick up on vibes of the players who need anger management. So, if a player on the ice doesn’t get his way and get all heated, don’t you think he brings home that same type of vibe?
Note: there is data that backs this up. Don’t believe me, go on Google and find it.
To summarize, the problem stems from inside the league and blooms all the way around the league. The first step to create change is simple: The League needs a written policy and the players need to start being accountable for it.
So, will women finally speak up and have a voice or will they “stay in line” and “behave” like all NHL players want them too?
Time will tell, but in 2024, the TIME IS NOW.
Being Released This Fall
The Book That Gary Bettman and company doesn’t want me to write.
This book will be written in 2 parts.
The first part will be my creativity in motion. Athletes from some NHL teams will know or maybe will know that it is about them.
Part 2 is the story of the NHL from a Female Perspective
IF you follow me on Tiktok, Twitter X, or Youtube, hints will be posted for part 1.
It’s about to get magical
January 23rd –
The day that the podcast “The Championship Mindset” will launch. Yes, it will launch BEFORE the book e-book version. The paperback version will be the last to be launch.
You can subscribe to the podcast here: SUBSCRIBE
A champion mindset is a mindset that allows you to perform your best. Anyone that works on adopting this mindset will not only get better at what they do, but they will have the chance to be the best at what they do. Mindset is the biggest factor in success. Your mindset impacts each and every decision that you take. Now, this mindset just isn’t for athletes, it is for everyone.
Each week I will do a podcast, blog post, and post some creative content designed to inspire you and encourage you.
Here is an affirmation to help you for the weekend ahead:
I am the master of my thoughts and energy and I can create my destiny.
Affirmations are positive statements that can help you to overcome self-sabotaging, negative thoughts.
Remember, Nothing happens by chance, but you need to take the chance and get out of your comfort zone in order to achieve greatness.
If you want the championship mindset you need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. By having a deep-rooted belief in your abilities, you have the potential for success. Having confidence in your skills and talents, is one part but visualizing your routine that makes you feel excited about the future to align your thoughts and emotions, is what makes the championship mindset possible!
I hope you will join me.
You can subscribe to the podcast here: SUBSCRIBE
Hi, You Can Call Me Karma
We’ve made it to the end of 2023.
We need to remind ourselves that this is a journey with ups and downs twists and turns, but that we need to stop looking at everything as a “when we get there” and enjoy the journey.
So before the ball drops in Times Square, release what is no longer serving you.
Move forward knowing that everything is working for your highest good.
Walk into 2024 with vulnerability – learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.
There are still going to be times when things won’t work out perfectly, and that is okay.
But that is the point.
Shift things in 2024 from wanting to it’s happening and there is NOTHING ANYONE can do to stop it from happening! They can bitch, they can troll, they can complain but what is meant for you will happen in its perfect timing!
SUBSCRIBE to my podcast in 2024 to hear the message of the championship mindset.
(Also, hey, the behind the scenes stuff too!)
Let’s get excited! SO many AWESOME things are ABOUT to unfold in 2024! Follow my path and create yours.
When I went into 2023 – I KNEW this year was going to be different and bring me so many new possibilities, opportunities, experiences, and adventures. The seeds were planted and now in 2024 it’s time to watch them bloom. When you walk your path doing it scared and doing it unprepared, your desires will guide you to where you need to go. This is the BEST PART!!
Live each day with gratitude realizing that is going to get you so much more than you can ever want or need.
The obstacles are what we need.
When we see the opponent on the ice, we don’t run from them, we just gain clarity as to what our next move is.
Your only job in 2024 is to JUST BE.
Congrats on getting through whatever it is that you got through in 2023… Now, let’s continue this journey together in 2024.
Stephanie 's Corner 