The book that everybody has been waiting for is finally arriving on your shelf soon .
more to come!
Just Gonna Leave This Here
2025: Unrealistic Body Image Finally Enters The Chat
We live in a culture that praises weight loss. The message we’re sending is that you only look good because you lost weight.
Fat phobia- because of our intent, we perpetuate diet culture, and fat phobia when we compliment someone on their smaller body. Our society praises weight loss as if it’s the best thing a person could ever do. Not only that, but we comment on people’s bodies without having any idea what is going on in their lives.
Last week Jennifer Love Hewitt made more women in their 40s so happy that someone in Hollywood actually looks like them. She didn’t run off to use ozempic and she didn’t go ahead and do a crazy-ass diet. She is what women are SUPPOSED to look like and she was so proud of her body!
We “assume” that their weight loss is “positive”, when it could be due to a chronic illness or an eating disorder. All unsolicited comments about someone’s body are bad and shouldn’t be praised because no one asked for them. Even if someone asks, we shouldn’t even give them one when actually we should take it a step further and tell people that they don’t want to receive those comments.
We should be telling people to focus on who that person is not by what that person looks like. If only people did this on social media.
Social media is the perfect environment, unfortunately, where the diet culture flourishes. It thrives on comments from men who think they know that certain bodies are “better and hotter” than others. Yes, guys who are losing their hair, have beer bellies, droopy chests and butts, are telling women that they all need to look like a goddamn Barbie doll, when they themselves are so far away from representing Ken.
Women who already have suffered from a body image disorder, get triggered by those comments and now are drawn back into the diet culture. And for what? To please all the men who you don’t know on social media, who basically have their own insecurities about their own looks and projected on women?
The sad reality is, if you look on social media and even dating apps, all men want this fantasy woman who is 5 feet tall 5 inches, 130 pounds, size 2, blonde hair, and blue eyes, who accepts bare minimum, and who could pass for either a Victoria’s Secret model or a Barbie doll. What they don’t realize is that a woman’s looks is never going to raise their children. Her mindset will.
Men never focus on who a woman really is, speaking in terms of her personality, mentality, and character. But they only focus on how hot she looks so his teammates, and friends can be extremely jealous of his arm candy.
Oh, once you hit 35 and you’re a woman you’re old and decrepit according to social media.
If only men could stop being, “so full of themselves,” and stop trying to “fit in” focusing on loving a woman for who they truly are. But instead, they don’t want to embrace that main character energy. They wanna focus on what isn’t instead of what is.
I guess the question really is this : do we really want to spend our lives agonizing over trying to make others happy instead of making each day we live the best days we’ve ever had? When are we going to realize that nobody at your funeral is going to say the following: “ I remember so-and-so, she was a size 4 all her life, she was always so skinny, she was always looking hot and beautiful, etc”
They are going to remember how you made others feel, how you lived life and the kindness you showed others . That’s a life worth remembering.
Should I say, I told you so?
If you follow this blog or my podcast, you know that for over the past year I have been preaching and talking about how the NHL’s culture is very sexist and has a misogyny tone.
I have pointed out cases when this happened, not to mention my own experience. Well, today we found out that the New York Rangers and the NHL have been covering up ( Surprise… but not really) Artemi Panarin’s alleged sexual assault of a former MSG staffer.
The story which broke from Katie Strang, of the Athletic, which is the following: The Rangers and Artemi Panarin reached settlements in August 2024 with a former female employee regarding a sexual assault claim, stemming from a December 2023 incident where Panarin took the employee’s phone, and would not give it back to her until she came to his hotel room, where he allegedly pinned her down on a bed, she pushed him off, and left.
As also told by beat writer, Vince Mercogliano, The woman, who was not identified in the report, reached agreements with Panarin and MSG Sports, which included non-disclosure and no admission of wrongdoing clauses, and then left the company.
The Club retained an outside law firm to conduct an independent investigation, which the League was fully apprised of. We consider the matter closed,” the NHL said in a statement. The league and Rangers declined to say whether Panarin was disciplined regarding the situation.
The female employee felt she was treated unfairly, according to team sources, and she then informed the team about the alleged assault. In February 2021, Panarin stepped away from the team for personal reasons after a Russian newspaper reported claims he was involved in a physical altercation with a woman in Latvia that year.
It’s important to note that when the Rangers were investigating a separate matter involving the same employee giving “anti-anxiety medicine” to a player on a team flight. The Rangers’ social media employees were no longer permitted to travel with the team as a result.
It’s also important to note that Jess Isner, who was the social media admin for the Boston Bruins and the Phoenix Coyotes prior to being the social media admin of the New York Rangers from 2019-2023 is no longer the admin and all her social media has been deleted.
The public may not realize just how many victims of any crime blame themselves for their own victimization. Self blame is one of the most toxic forms of emotional abuse. It amplifies our perceived inadequacies, whether real or imagined, and paralyzes us before we can even begin to move forward. Seemingly innocent questions from family and friends can trigger self-doubt and prevent victims from reporting to police.
They may also question what they did wrong and believe it was their fault. Sexual harassment and assault can be a humiliating experience to recount privately, let alone publicly. Victims of sexual harassment and sexual assault in adulthood or sexual abuse in childhood tend to feel shame, because as human beings, we want to believe hat we have control over what happens to us. When that personal power is challenged by a victimization of any kind, we feel humiliated.
Another reason women don’t go to the police is that they fear of the repercussions when it comes to reporting sexual harassment or assault — fear of losing their job, fear they won’t find another job, fear they will be passed over for a promotion, fear of losing their credibility, fear of being branded a troublemaker, fear of being blackballed in their industry, fear of their physical safety, etc. The fact that sexual misconduct is the most under-reported crime is due to a common belief that women make up these stories for attention or to get back at a man who rejected them. Victims’ accounts are often scrutinized to the point of exhaustion.
Also women feel it is useless to come forward, because they have seen the way others have been treated. They feel it is hopeless, because they won’t be believed, and their reputations will be tainted, if not ruined. Women who have already been sexually assaulted or harassed feel especially helpless, since the chances are extremely high that they did not receive the justice they so desperately needed.
To all the men out there focusing so much energy on trying to figure out why victims don’t report, it would be far more productive to ask, “Why do we allow men to continue to sexually harass and assault women?”
FYI: Next Tuesday in a courtroom in London, Ont., five former members of Canada’s 2018 World Juniors team go on trial, 15 months after they were charged with sexual assault.
Michael McLeod, Carter Hart, Alex Formenton, Cal Foote, and Dillon Dube have all pleaded not guilty. McLeod faces a second sexual assault charge as a party to the offense.
And to those men who think what happened with Panarin wasn’t “sexual assault” there are 3 levels of sexual assault and it doesn’t always include sexual intercourse. Level 1 involves minor physical injuries or no injuries to the victim. Sexual assault Level 2: Sexual assault with a weapon, threats, or causing bodily harm. Aggravated sexual assault. Level 3: Sexual assault that results in wounding, maiming, disfiguring or endangering the life of the victim.
Follow me on X or IG for more updates and important information.
Oh, so you’re in a relationship with an athlete
If you follow a lot of athletes on Instagram, you will see that they use the feature of stories very often and very well. They tend to put the girls they are “dating” or even those they are “married” to in those stories and not on their feed. Why?
A story only lasts 24 hours and then it disappears. Not everyone will technically see said story of you posing with the girl, so they have a better chance at hiding a romance while at the same time of letting the girl think they are exclusive because they “posted” about them together.
The MAIN excuse you will hear from these guys as to why they don’t wish to post on the feed about their relationships are the following: “I want to keep my life private,” or, “It’s no one’s business who I am with and what I am doing.” Or my favorite, “All the important people in our circle already know we are together, why do a bunch of strangers need to know?”
This here is straight up nonsense!
You are already using a social media platform so your life is not private. And you already started posting about other areas in your life, the main areas of your life can’t be kept private now. Let me add that all those who do have private IG accounts look like they are HIDING things NOT that they want to have a “private life” as an athlete.
So what is the motive of an athlete who doesn’t post up about their married or even who they are dating? They do this to appear single and to “keep their options open,” so when they go on the road and use the dating app Tinder, girls who try and look them up are lied too about them being in a relationship. Although some naive girls will still believe an athlete when they tell them that they are “not happy” in their relationship and that they are planning of getting a divorce when they aren’t.
Let me also add that I know a former NFL player and his wife and on Instagram, and one day she posted that she laughs at all the women who end up in her husband’s DMS, because they don’t know that she reads their private messages… (insert laughing out loud emoji)
Remember it’s not the actual social media that ruins relationships. People who don’t respect relationship boundaries do. There’s a difference between private and secret. And if you are a secret, then you are NOT respected nor a priority.
Also note that if you ask a guy why he hasn’t posted you up, check out his body language and how he flips the script and says that YOU are acting insecure, YOU don’t trust him, etc. It is a clear give away that he is LYING to you and that he wants to keep his options open or that he is already cheating on you.
That is why MEN should POST UP his lady/woman first. That shows you EXACTLY how he feels about you. Actions ALWAYS speak louder than any words he ever says to you. When a man posts up his girl it signifies that he is PROUD of his woman, that he LOVES her, and he doesn’t want ANY OTHER MAN to have her! When he doesn’t, you are just a little toy in his game. That’s why basic chicks need to STEP up their game. In my experience people settle because a part of them believe that is all they deserve or because they are desperate, are afraid of being alone . They may feel that they aren’t WORTHY of something better, even though she CLEARLY is!
It’s all about the mindset. One day, when I was around 24, A complete stranger in a coffee shop overheard my conversation and said, “You know what, you are a big jar, but you think you’re a small one.”
It took years for me to understand what he meant.
I settled a lot. I thought small. I had a mediocre job, a mediocre relationship, a mediocre life.
I didn’t put myself first. I failed to appreciate the present. I did not know how to make the most of my talents and gifts.
After a few years, and lots of hard work, travels, relationships, after finally accepting that I am the captain of my own life and that I should put myself first, I saw my jar getting bigger and bigger.
Now, I am in love with my life – one that is filled with joy, excitement, and possibilities. Everyday is spectacular. That is the type of life I wish for everyone.
Stop thinking so small. You are worth everything you deserve and more.
Claim Your Spot in 2025
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I will be doing a crowdfunding event this spring with some great packages/prizes, so also look at for that too!
Thanks for reading and for your support. It means A LOT to me!
The Silent Women Part 2
Jacob Trouba ( a fake account set up on this platform)
“LOL which player rejected you?? There is no problem with women who are in relationships with NHL players; dating, married, or otherwise. The NHL is definitely NOT against women. The problem is you and your unhinged and attitude. If you feel that the NHL is against women like you, then rightfully so!!!”
Oh look I triggered you – Oh snap ( insert eye roll here and smirk)
See, the problem is NOT my unhinged attitude its the fact that these men can’t DEAL WITH IT because it is THE TRUTH. And this is a CLASSIC narcissist gaslighting response. Also, it seems as though this male is unhinged because he wants women to accept the status quo and not be better and do better. He probably also thinks it is a flex to sleep with multiple women too.
Obviously this dude also doesn’t know HOW to read. I never said there was a problem WITH women… I said clearly that the CULTURE and The TYPE of woman they are groomed to be with is the problem. DUH!
Guys do not want to become better men, so that’s why they settle for the basic chick because they’re not going to force them to be better.
And it’s not just the men who play in the NHL it’s men who are fans of the NHL.
That whole entire topic of would women choose the bear over a man in the woods, triggered so many men, but it just didn’t trigger men. It triggered the boys who are insecure and immature, and probably will never be men.
But back to the NHL for a second …
You can listen to the podcast. I just did on this topic here. * click to listen *
And if you would like to read the books that are written on men in relationships…
You can click here … I’m sure you’ll find what you need to find in the books.
But just to continue for a second ..
I mentioned in the last post about Instagram and the stories and how all these NHL players use them. . I did not mention why it’s terrible and what exactly it means when a man does that shit. But I will start with this if you’re a woman and you are dating an NHL player do not be the first to post him up. Let him be the first to post you up. Because then you’ll know that you’re dealing with the athlete that is proud to have you as his woman and he would like to show you off to everyone else if he only puts you up in his story he’s still trying to look single.
If you go look at Cale Maker, Andrew Copp, Connor McDavid, Matthew Tkachuk, Ryan Lindgren, Jacob Trouba , etc… you will find on their actual pages, there is no such thing as they are/were actually dating a woman let alone being married to them. And then they’ll just say well my life is private, blah blah blah…. It’s not that their life is private. It’s that they’re 1) not proud of the woman they’re with because 2) she’s a basic chick and 3) it’s a secret so they can hook up using Tinder and other means especially when they’re on the road.
I mean, let’s look carefully at Connor McDavid, who was filmed on video in 2022 coming out of a bar with another woman not Laura who we ended up marrying . BTW…. If you look at their wedding photo there, there’s a specific one where they look like they’re unhappy. She knew that he’s a cheater and a liar and yet she still married him.
There’s a saying, a person who settles for crumbs, never understood the mentality of someone who wants the whole cake. Men want their cake and eat it too, but the women are not allowed to have that today. The women shouldn’t want the whole cake. They should just settle for crumbs and be happy.
Here’s something that I spoke about on the podcast if you are a woman and you give up your financial freedom to a man you’re pretty much done. If all women wanna do is just live off, their husband’s means and have nothing to fall back on, that’s the reason why most these women stay in abusive relationships. Well that and the fact that only 10% of those women that leave survive.
A smart man realizes it’s better to grow with a smart woman because he’s never satisfied with his basic chick and that’s why you don’t see more of those smart men who play in the national hockey league with intelligent women. They don’t accept bare minimum simple because they can provide bare minimum for themselves . We don’t need men men need us. If a man can manipulate you into making you believe he loves you you’re done hence that’s why they choose basic chicks, most likely under the age of 26.
And BTW… there are a lot of married single moms in the NHL. Those who do EVERYTHING on their own and the men don’t do shit. I talk more on the podcast about this.
Men are intimidated by intelligent women. They are inferior to them, but women who gave blow jobs just to get ahead are the women men can control and that’s why hockey players choose basic chicks because they will accept the bare minimum and are easily controlled.
If you look back through the history of the NHL and I mean way back, coaches used to sleep with other coaches wives players used to sleep with other players wives …. This type of culture starts in junior hockey.
Also, last year there was a scenario on TikTok with the NHL player Alex Wennberg . A lot of fantasy writers use the NHL players and sexualize the players themselves. Hence we had something called booktok. And the funny thing about it is the fact that the admin for the Seattle Kraken bought into it and used it in their social media.
If you look on TikTok, a lot of women sexualize the warm-up routine that a lot of NHL players do. (Its mostly certain type of stretching) But those women to me are not true hockey fans those women are the thirsty hoes. Yes I said what I said. You are a thirsty hoe, if you are sexualizing what hockey players are doing in warm up. It’s perfectly fine to say a guy a hot, good looking, dresses sharp, etc. BUT when you sexualize them, then you are saying the way that THEY treat women is acceptable.
I want women to want to better themselves and I want that for their daughters too.
Like I’ve seen before I have no problem if you wanna be a stay at home mom and live off your husband‘s means, but that means you’re giving up your financial freedom to your man. That means that no matter if he physically abuses you, emotionally abuses, you, or mentally abuses you You will end up staying in that relationship and teaching your daughter that there are no ways out and that you’re not worth it.
Women need to realize that they’re worth it!
Calling me unhinged just means I’m doing something right because it’s an unhinged attitude that men don’t appreciate and don’t like because I’ve said it before I’ll say it again they don’t want to better themselves. They want to be IN control of everything, especially a woman. They want women to be submissive to them and their needs and their wants . And the only way they can do that is if they pick a basic chick who accepts bare minimum.
By the way, on the podcast, I pick apart some of the New York Rangers wives and girlfriends and tell you some of the things that I see on their social compared to the things that their husbands and boyfriends post. I also get into this a little bit deeper on the podcast. It’s a great listen. I suggest you listen to it. Tell you, it’s a lot easier talking about it than it is writing it. So you’ll get some really good stuff on that podcast.
Again, here’s the podcast link : click here
In a world full of copies, be an original.
It’s been awhile since I wrote a blog piece, but I have a great excuse… I’ve been busy trying to get my shit together, but seriously who hasn’t been?
I have been working on multiple projects and I will have updates for ya soon. If you want instant behind the scenes stuff, then I invite you to follow my Youtube Channel where most of that is posted.
Recently I was back doing choreography for an upcoming R&B singer – and that felt awesome to be dancing again because here’s a hint from a creative person, when you do anything creative whether it is writing, music, art, dancing, etc.. it helps build up your creative juices! I think I will be doing more of that in the future!
And speaking of music, I am still putting together my album. It’s crazy to see how life really does go full circle. Back in the 2000’s ( the early portion) I actually was trying for a record deal even if I didn’t sing the songs but sell the music/lyrics to artists. Back then we didn’t have social media to do that, we needed to make a tape, mail it to a producer and then literally wait by the mailbox, which is was TORTURE! My cousin had a meeting with the same producer I sent my work too and that is how I found out that they loved my stuff. But … a lot of things how to fall into place and well, it didn’t.
Seeing now how God/universe was redirecting me and protecting me from the music industry now that we see all the shit unfolding with Diddy, makes me know that the timing was not right then. But like I said, everything in life comes full circle and now is the perfect time for me to have an album that I will produce by myself with the help of technology.
UPDATE:
So, the NHL is trying their “best” to make it look like they are “women friendly” and care about women by having women take part of organizations in a big way. The biggest way is with the Kraken and the hiring of Jessica Campbell as their Asst. Coach. Now, I will say she qualifies for this position and frankly she should have been hired years ago, so I question the timing of this. Especially with the fact that 5 guys are being tried in a Canadian court room next spring for sexual assault.
But this is here why the NHL SHOULD HAVE a policy to PROTECT HER.
The NHL commissioner STILL refuses! so what happens when she is sexually harassed? God forbid anything worse happens! I have sent The NHL over 4 correspondence and I have only heard back once! This month is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Here are some important stats:
Over 1 in 3 women in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.
At least 5 million acts of domestic violence occur annually to women aged 18 years and older.
Domestic abuse can be mental, physical, economic or sexual in nature.
And here’s something else to know: Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where a person causes someone to question their sanity, memories, or perception of reality.
** I will be staying on top of this with the NHL **
Video Links: Remembering Johnny Hockey
Video Links: Matt Rempe ( his acting debut) – If you listen to my podcast, you hear me talk about how much I love his vibe! It’s authentic and real, not fake or stuck up like all other athletes.
This week BTW on my podcast which I do NFL picks, and talk about hockey (NY Rangers- mostly) I talked about positive and negative energy towards the end of the podcast. It’s really a good listen if you want to learn how to have the Championship Mindset.
Podcast link: click here
Being Released This Fall
The Book That Gary Bettman and company doesn’t want me to write.
This book will be written in 2 parts.
The first part will be my creativity in motion. Athletes from some NHL teams will know or maybe will know that it is about them.
Part 2 is the story of the NHL from a Female Perspective
IF you follow me on Tiktok, Twitter X, or Youtube, hints will be posted for part 1.
Caffeine and Chocolate: our two main food groups.
I can’t believe that I haven’t posted in a month! That’s crazy, but then again that is how my life sometimes goes.
I have been traveling for cheerleading so now that the cheer season is over (well the travel part) I can sit down and update y’all about some exciting things that have happened in the past month and of course talk about the elephants in the room.
CHEER:
After working with this company for the past year where I sell my cheerleading curriculum- I am parting ways with them since I am developing my own cheerleading website working with another company to provide credit card processing payments with it.
The site will have the coaches curriculum needed to run a cheerleading team and program. Plus tools, scoresheet assistance, merch and of course choreography.
I think I choosing to do a blog every now and then just to list updates, but that will be on the site as well.
Podcast
I am still doing the audio only podcast through Spotify but I decided not to do subscriptions with it simply because A) I don’t want to have to record 2 podcasts B) I love sharing things with everyone, why limit it to you have to pay to hear this… ( I think that is stupid and its unnecessary but I thank those who did pay to subscribe!)
AND… My podcast is up for an Award W3 for best host with the guest I had on back in October! Some previous winners included: A 60 Minutes Podcast from Paramount Company and GoDaddy won an award for one of their original series…
BUT… I have joined Rumble and will be doing a separate podcast there besides posting some fun videos… The podcast there will be called The Revenge Tour and that will start some time in May.
I will be posting on my YoutubeChannel my series, “Behind the Scenes: The Diary of A Social Gal” this week and next week.
Ah yes, the elephant in the room. If you want to see the most judgemental, attention seekers, losers then you need to go to Twitter X.
Social media trolls are like those annoying characters from fairytales who live under bridges and try to cause trouble for passersby. But instead of riddles and tolls, they use inflammatory messages and outrageous lies to disrupt online conversations and get a rise out of people. They don’t want to admit it, but they are fans in denial AND that I live rent free in their little heads.
But can I admit something? I love them. Not all the time. But they really strive to prove their insecure and jealous while at the same time they make me laugh. You have to love folks who take the time to point out YOUR imperfections while they ignore theirs.
Oh, I have a surprise announcement …. shhh… so if you follow me on IG, Twitter, Youtube, Rumble, Tiktok, and Facebook… you’ll get it. The announcement will be different on each platform. …
Mind Over Matter
Yes- the rumors are true! My book, “The Championship Mindset” has been published and you can purchase it ONLY here (C lick here) Barnes and Noble dot com!
A champion mindset is a mindset that allows you to perform your best. Anyone that works on adopting this mindset will not only get better at what they do, but they will have the chance to be the best at what they do. Mindset is the biggest factor in success. Your mindset impacts each and every decision that you take. Whether you are an athlete or not, you can acquire The Championship Mindset!
A CONTEST / GIVEAWAY is coming soon!
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Stephanie 's Corner 