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Caffeine and Chocolate: our two main food groups.

I can’t believe that I haven’t posted in a month! That’s crazy, but then again that is how my life sometimes goes.
I have been traveling for cheerleading so now that the cheer season is over (well the travel part) I can sit down and update y’all about some exciting things that have happened in the past month and of course talk about the elephants in the room.

CHEER:

After working with this company for the past year where I sell my cheerleading curriculum- I am parting ways with them since I am developing my own cheerleading website working with another company to provide credit card processing payments with it.
The site will have the coaches curriculum needed to run a cheerleading team and program. Plus tools, scoresheet assistance, merch and of course choreography.
I think I choosing to do a blog every now and then just to list updates, but that will be on the site as well.

Podcast

I am still doing the audio only podcast through Spotify but I decided not to do subscriptions with it simply because A) I don’t want to have to record 2 podcasts B) I love sharing things with everyone, why limit it to you have to pay to hear this… ( I think that is stupid and its unnecessary but I thank those who did pay to subscribe!)

AND… My podcast is up for an Award W3 for best host with the guest I had on back in October! Some previous winners included: A 60 Minutes Podcast from Paramount Company and GoDaddy won an award for one of their original series…

BUT… I have joined Rumble and will be doing a separate podcast there besides posting some fun videos… The podcast there will be called The Revenge Tour and that will start some time in May.

I will be posting on my YoutubeChannel my series, “Behind the Scenes: The Diary of A Social Gal” this week and next week.

Ah yes, the elephant in the room. If you want to see the most judgemental, attention seekers, losers then you need to go to Twitter X.
Social media trolls are like those annoying characters from fairytales who live under bridges and try to cause trouble for passersby. But instead of riddles and tolls, they use inflammatory messages and outrageous lies to disrupt online conversations and get a rise out of people. They don’t want to admit it, but they are fans in denial AND that I live rent free in their little heads.
But can I admit something? I love them. Not all the time. But they really strive to prove their insecure and jealous while at the same time they make me laugh. You have to love folks who take the time to point out YOUR imperfections while they ignore theirs.

Oh, I have a surprise announcement …. shhh… so if you follow me on IG, Twitter, Youtube, Rumble, Tiktok, and Facebook… you’ll get it. The announcement will be different on each platform. …

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I told you, too bad you didn’t listen

If you read my best selling book, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid the 2nd Ed,” I warned you that dating apps were all hoaxes designed to use your heart strings to make money. And this week we learn that Match Group, the owner of Tinder, Hinge, and the League, aren’t designed to help users find love, but rather, to empty their pockets and that they are a far cry from being, “designed to be deleted,” which is Hinge’s slogan.
In the lawsuit we find that the six plaintiffs accuse the dating apps, Hinge, that the algorithm predicts a user will find most attractive are locked up in “rose jail’–where daters are required to send these profiles a rose, rather than a regular like, of which they only get one per week–and TikTokers offering dissatisfied swipers “hacks” to get around such an obstacle.

Also on other dating apps, such as Tinder, essentially, the app used an Elo rating system, which is the same method used to calculate the skill levels of chess players: You rose in the ranks based on how many people swiped right on (“liked”) you, but that was weighted based on who the swiper was. The more right swipes that person had, the more their right swipe on you meant for your score.

The League, is as snobby as it sounds…
The app encourages you to choose high-quality photos of you smiling and doing things that interest you, like hiking or going to dinner with friends, rather than posting tons of party photos or selfies in bad lighting. They want you to show off and send the message that you’re cool and attractive. You have to link the app to your LinkedIn and other social media. By doing so, The League automatically inputs your education and career to your profile, so everyone can see how smart and accomplished you are. The app tracks how often you log in, if you respond to people’s messages, how picky you are, if you’re nice to your concierge and other activity. Your matches can also flag your profile and report you if you’re “flaky” or rude through messages or on a date.

THE KICKER: You only get three matches per day (though you can pay to see more prospects). Once you match, you have 21 days to chat before the match and your chat expires. While an expired chat history is still viewable, you won’t be able to engage with that person anymore. The membership is EXTREMELY expensive for a few more “exclusives” that are nothing of measure to even note.

Hinge, makes money through in-app purchases and advertisements. Most of Hinge’s revenue comes from in-app purchases such as boosts, roses, and premium subscriptions. These purchases unlock features on the app to make it easier and more convenient. Another way that Hinge makes money is through advertisements. Whereas the free version lets you “like” up to 8 profiles per day, and if someone’s like you back, it’s a “match.” From there, you send each other unlimited messages and even do video calls.

Remember, there are many studies that suggest that couples who meet using dating apps are slightly more likely to have less satisfying and less stable marriages than couples who meet offline.

As I have said from the beginning, dating apps are great for finding short-term romances, but they’re not conducive to building sustainable relationships. Dating apps don’t work because they are designed to be fast, easy and casual. They’re not good for getting to know someone well and building a strong foundation for a future relationship. Too bad, most don’t listen to me.

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Games People Play


Some men simply like to be dominating in a relationship; even when a man likes to keep you hanging without giving any clear indication of how he feels about you, he wants to dominate the game. It has been said that boys play games, but I can honestly tell you that men do it too. Boys are amateurs though when it comes to really playing “the game,” while men know how to dangle a carrot to have us run after them. (Or, so they think!) By manipulating you, he can ensure that his needs are met first. This behavior is often driven by insecurity or jealousy. But here is the part that men don’t get:

Girls are players too. Now, I have seen the quotes online before that girls chase, women replace, and that part if 100% truth, but that does NOT mean that women don’t play games. We know how to get our guys right where we want them. Seriously, it’s not that hard. To turn the tables, it’s time to learn how to play a guy at his own game. Here are three key components to giving him a taste of his own medicine, and why not even a little more? He deserves it for playing with your heart.

1- He’s used to you liking all his photos, commenting on them, texting him multiple times a day. In other words, he’s used to you chasing him. Time to flip the script girl, and do him ACTUALLY as he does you. So if he ONLY views your IG story, you view his. If he totally keeps you on read, you keep him on read ( if he is talking to you) Whatever HE does to you- you do it back BUT with a little more flair and fanfare.
Make him work harder for your time; you’re not an easy catch- remember YOU ARE the catch!

2) While you’re busy trying to win him over, make sure you spend time enjoying yourself. Go out with friends, meet other people, and if he’s there, remember to have a good time and not give him all your undivided attention. Let him earn that. Let him be the first one to approach you. Don’t get sucked into the game when you see him even talking to other girls. Such men enjoy teasing women and rocking their emotions, and often do so without any guilt.

3) When he sees himself falling for you, he’s going to pull out all the stops in hopes of holding onto the control. This isn’t going to work overnight either. But if you really want this guy, it will do exactly what you want it to do. No messaging him out of the blue or just because on IG, no texting him either. If he messages you or texts you first, then yes, respond to him, but not right away. Let him know that you are busy, that you have a life. Let the guy know that you have other options. Guys hate it when they see that you know your options are wide open.

The key here to to think like a guy and totally disregard his feelings. Be savage.
At first it feels like shit, but then as you keep doing it, it is very empowering.

There are about four other things you can do to play a guy like he plays you, but I keep those close to the chest. If you gals would like to know what those are… feel free to contact me on IG Twitter X or Facebook and DM me. And I will share those tips with you.

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I’m a vibe that no one can ever replace

So as I said in the last blog post, I had some really interesting dating stories to share. If you read this blog then you know that I am in these chats with girls who talk about their dating lives and the stupid, narcissistic, jerks of men that they either date or are interested in from dating apps.
Before I continue, don’t reach out to me to tell me that your long lost cousin found his wife on a dating app- yes I get it… that was the point of these apps YEARS ago. Today they are all filled with either married men cheating on their wives, young guys who think it’s a flex to sleep with as many as possible, or even catfishers who are trying to scam women out of their money.
I was thinking that we all what the stories are going to be- so instead of telling you the stories, I will tell you about the DMs I have received asking for my dating advice:

Question 1: For a first date this guy asked me out on a coffee date? Is that showing him that my standards are low, when they aren’t anywhere close to that?

MY ANSWER: A cute cafe with a romantic ambiance and the best coffee in town is the perfect way to lay the foundation for that special connection you’re hoping to build. Coffee shop dates are the most socially acceptable way of meeting someone, spending time with that person, and keeping a nice conversation going to get to know them better. These meetings don’t have to be necessarily romantic in nature. A date shouldn’t be about the the amount of money spent, it should be about getting to know someone, feeling a vibe with someone and creating memories. Meeting someone new is not always easy for everyone. And to some, they have anxiety when it comes to doing this. A coffee date is a simple way of just breaking the ice with someone having fun, not to mention, and coffee. It also allows both people to see the other person’s personality and feel relaxed.
Finally, if you plan a highly elaborate romantic date that involves a full-course meal, and perhaps some wine in a five star restaurant, it will automatically build up a lot of expectation. Here, in a cafe, there are no expectations.

( this is why I thought of the segment, “Coffee With The Captain” because simply it is a fun thing to do- have coffee and talk hockey/life. It’s a relaxing atmosphere – yes, I am STILL waiting on Jacob Trouba… this is why if women had to wait for men the entire human race would have died out by now. – which leads me to the next question.. )

Question 2- Is okay for me to ask a guy out?

MY ANSWER: Like I said above if women had to wait for men the entire human race would have died out by now. Seriously guys take so long to get around to ask a girl out. They overthink things to the point where they literally scared themselves to death and then either think they shouldn’t ask her out or they prolong the asking part.
There are so many Tiktok’s and IG videos that women post that say shit like, “Women were made to be chased.” Sure the guy can still chase a girl but we can hint to the guy that we like him and make him confident enough to ask us out OR we can do the asking. I see no harm in asking for the 1st date, then the pressure of the 2nd goes on the guy. He can then “chase” you for the 2nd.

Question 3- Is it always a bad move to date someone just out of a relationship?

MY ANSWER:
There really isn’t such a thing as “too early” to date after a breakup. Then there are folks who say it could easily be a major red flag because they haven’t taken the proper time to heal. I say, that it is not a one-size fits all situation. I think it’s best to start that relationship off as friends and just slowly move into the relationship romantically. BUT.. if that particular person that just broke up or divorced someone was not emotionally or mentally invested in the relationship as part of the reason they broke up, then I think the romantic side of the relationship will happen a lot quicker, especially if they are emotionally and mentally drawn to you. But to each it’s own. It’s okay to start ANY relationship off SLOW. We have to remember that it’s not a race.

The Diary Of A Social Gal Update

For all those who follow my Youtube channel I will posting many, many updates, behind the scenes, and fun content. If you aren’t subscribed, you should be!

Here’s a quickie update anyway-
1- I am DONE coaching cheerleading. NOT done Choreographing routines – so if you know a a team that needs routine that not only will win, but will have all eyes on them, you can DM me on Instagram
2- I am on the path to becoming a CHEER JUDGE! I am so excited! It definitely is my calling. I was made to be a cheer judge! So excited so I will be updating on Youtube as I go through the process with these organizations. It’s an exciting time for me.
3- I am writing 2 books at the same time. Yes, just like I did a few years ago. I am writing The Championship Mindset which will be a workbook and also audio that you will be able to get if you subscribe to my podcast – $2.99 a month is worth it. Not only will you get the audio version of the book, but you will also get weekly exclusive podcasts for subscribers only. I also will be giving weekly updates that are not part of the book and times when I can go one on one coaching. More to come…
4- I am working in NYC – my office space is there and it is living out a dream. I am THE CITY girl! IF you have been following me, then you know how I feel about manifesting and walking the path by doing it scared and doing unprepared. This is part of the Championship Mindset which is for teams but also for folks that want to live a championship life.

There’s a lot of awesome content that I will be rolling out. And yes, even some controversial blogs… of course, like duh, I was born a savage, did you expect anything less?

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Date apps are for dorks. Women are those dorks.

First let me start with the study: Research shows dating apps like Hinge, Bumble or Tinder can be associated with negative impacts on mental health. According to a study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, there is a link between using dating apps and experiencing loneliness, dissatisfaction with life and feeling excluded from the world. The research points out that it is a paradox, as people have more ways to connect than ever before yet many of those connections can feel empty, fleeting, and insecure.

Also, I will note that if you read either my best selling book, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid 2d Ed” or you read “Relationship Impossible” you read the information I gave you that, when it comes to dating apps, there is such a thing as choice overload, whereas, people tend to pick the wrong partner due to the fact that there are way too many options to choose from.

Now to the funny part of this: When I told a bunch of women the following in this dating group I am in, most of these women were so sensitive to the following truth:

NO high quality man is going to be on a dating site. 

I know it’s the “easiest” way to meet guys although social media isn’t that bad of an option… BUT the high quality man that you ladies are looking for aren’t on dating sites! The whole concept of a dating app is for women to chase after men, whereas high value men don’t want to be chased they want to be the ones who pursue.  Now that doesn’t mean that women can’t flirt with men because sometimes they need a little push and telling them that you are interested in them is a good thing, but a high valued man is not on a dating app. If you notice, the only men you find on a dating app are all the men who are those who are cheating, are married, lie, and some are even rapists.

Why women think it will be different because they are on Bumble or Hinge, or are paying for the app is an insane idea! EVERY dating app works the same way! The algorithm is just as it is in finding movies you will enjoy on Netflix and all those guys whom you reject, are recycled back into your choices every 30 days or so.

I seriously roll my eyes every time a woman in these chats I am in post a photo of the guy whom she is talking to on an app to find out the “fax” about him and the answers are pretty much like this:

“So I have been seeing and talking to a guy nonstop for the past month or so. We were supposed to hangout Saturday but I cancelled on him last minute because I found out a mutual friend had also been talking to him and he tried to schedule a date the same day as ours but earlier in the day it kinda made me feel a bit grossed out and I’m not sure what to do.”

“Omg! We talked for a while and he kept flaking on plans and kept saying he was traveling, sick, busy, etc. but wanted to keep texting. Eventually I stopped responding.”

“On his Bumble profile, he selected ‘Wants someday’ for kids. I hope this was a mistake bc he has grandchildren and he is actually 67, not 47 like it shows on his profile. He also lied about his age on a site called MillionaireMatch and says he is 51 on there. His desired age range on that site is 22-39. He goes by the name …., but his real name is …..”

“4 kids 4baby moms denies the existence of his kids Alcoholic/abusive looks for woman to support him.”

This is ALL you see in these groups. And women WONDER why they haven’t met a high quality man yet on a fucking dating site? HAHAHA… seriously these women are stupid and naive to believe that the love of their life is on a dating app. AND a high quality man for that matter!
You have a better chance at being struck by lightning than you do finding a high quality man on a dating app. And then there are the women who comment in the group chat like this:

“I met my guy of 7/8 months on …. ”

Yes, good for you. Ask him, did he take down his dating profile on all the sites yet? Watch him squirm while answering. Remember, there are MARRIED men on these apps not to mention athletes who are married or in relationships who look for their hook up on the road.

Here are places to go meet HIGH QUALITY MEN this summer:

1- Nightclubs
2-Lounges
3-Sporting Events
4- Juice bars
5-Nice Coffee Shops ( Not Starbucks)
6- Exclusive Gyms
7- Social Clubs
8- Airport
9- High-end Spas
10-Tennis clubs and Golf Courses
11-Charity Events
12-Art Galleries
13-Open Houses ( obviously it’s a million dollar listing)
14-Nice Hotel Bars

The list can probably even be longer… but the point is… NO high Valued Man is going to be on Match, Ok Cupid, Hinge, Tinder, or even Bumble. I will even say on Million Dollar Match as well. Those guys are the scum of the Earth looking for hook ups, looking to scam you, looking to use you or looking to unfortunately to sexually assault you. And if I insulted anyone by saying this, sorry but not sorry, sometimes the truth hurts, doesn’t it?
Just because you deny it’s the truth doesn’t make it less true!

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Love Sex and Magic

These guys know sensuality begets aesthetics – first thing is first. Here’s the latest fashion segment presented by the NY Rangers- kings of Fashion Ave.
Here are some observations to take note of:

  1. The tie peering out of the buttoned jacket looks chic
  2. Just wearing a regular T-shirt with a suit jacket looks SO HOT
  3. The Black men’s shirt without a tie and a grey suit is simply sexy.
  4. A cobalt blue suit with a black shirt and black tie – looks INCREDIBLY HOT
  5. The light blue suit with a light purple shirt and dark purple tie is posh and sexy.
  6. The beanie with suit just makes a guy look incredibly rebellious
  7. An open suit jacket shows a guy’s swagger ( I like this look better when it is just a regular suit)
  8. The Pinstriped suit… OH MY GOD!
  9. If you want to stand out, where a different color suit jacket. The color will make the entire outfit stand out.
  10. The Long jacket looks very businesslike

Dating segment of blog

SO if you didn’t listen to my podcast last week, here is it CLICK HERE

I will though finish this conversation this week as it has SPARKED a little controversy with what I said, of course from the men. On Tiktok some guys posted videos of telling us girls that we shouldn’t play games with trying to get you. Hey, I agree that NO ONE should play games when it comes to dating. But here is the kicker: When it’s all you guys fault! You play games and you want a girl to chase you, if you stop playing games then we’ll stop playing them too. It’s pretty much that simple.
THEN on Twitter a guy actually told me that WOMEN don’t know what it’s like to be REJECTED! Is this guy serious? Women are rejected EVERY DAMN DAY! We are rejected from making the SAME amount of money a man is doing the SAME job. A woman is rejected from getting a job that is along the lines of CEO type jobs because how can a man work for a woman? A woman is rejected when it comes to relationships as well- she’s too big, too skinny, her boobs aren’t big enough, her booty is too small, she has cellulite, she makes her own money, she doesn’t need a man anyways. Guys tell us they want us to ask them out, that they find that to be a turn on, so when we do; they reject that idea because then she’s being too aggressive, assertive, and looks desperate.
See you guys have this stupid vision of what you think the ideal woman should be like and when real, wonderful, down to earth women fall short because of whatever stupid flaw, you reject them. Completely forgetting that EVERYONE comes with their own flaws, no one is perfect, unless they are on Instagram using filters.

So, I have been pretty straightforward about the ONLY guy I want to date. Some guys are upset that literally put this out there. So let me apologize for not wanting to waste my time and energy on a guy that I have simply NO INTEREST in dating. (Insert my sassy/sarcastic face) Why am I going to want to have low-valued experiences, which I have had in the past, when I know I what I want?
If you want to know why I want a hockey player… well, watch the video. Ya know, I have said time and time again cheerleaders belong with athletes. We get them. We understand them. And we support them unlike any other girl would ever do!
1) I may not be a supermodel but at least you know I’m showing up to support you and be your personal cheerleader in every single game you play!
2) I may not be the prettiest girl, but at least you never have to explain to be what penalties are and what’s the difference between a foreword and a defenseman.
3) I may not be smart when it comes to math but at least you’ll never have to explain what a PP, offside or icing is.
4) I may not post naked like all those girls do on their IGs, but at least you’ll never have to explain what FOs, SOG, TOI, or PTS means.

And if a guy I want doesn’t want to take the chance of a lifetime for the prize I am, that’s okay. I’m sure that I will find a hockey player that does. Boom Mic Drop.

Cheap products are always in demand. That’s why only those who can afford the Lamborghini get the prize. You would think the hockey players would know the difference between cheap and expensive. But like I have said some just settle for bare minimum and basic girls, when they deserve much more.

I am sure we will continue this conversation on Friday. Oh, and this girl on Tiktok posted this video explaining what 12 inches looks like. OMG. It was so accurate. I will explain to all the men out there on Friday what exactly women want. Trust me, you don’t want to miss the podcast Friday. See you Friday!!

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Better Together

If you listen to my podcast, you have heard me talk about how cheerleaders belong with athletes, and not just any athletes, but hockey players. And let me add, not necessarily a NHL player, but ANY player ( EHL, AHL, OHL, KHL, etc)
This guy on Tiktok helped me out tremendously by putting these together. A shout out to nackarockers for taking the words right out of my mouth. Just in case there was any doubt!

I will have A LOT of to say on Friday on the podcast. A LOT to say. As I think about this…

I smirk. I smile. I laugh literally out loud. The entire thing is crazy to me.

Question: why do people prefer people to be fake, secretive, and almost cunning, instead of being open and not afraid to be vulnerable? Why is it when you don’t have any outside motives that people still think you do? And so forth.

To Be Continued…. Oh, plus more on the Metro Division, playoffs, Cap/Escrow, CBA, the NY Rangers of course, and some other stuff… ( Fashion takes and question to guys on facial hair, spitting, and smelling salts, and crazy things I need to know!)

As always you get the sassy, sarcastic, up front version with no filter Friday. Yipee.

Twitter

Tiktok

IG : See below:

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This is the part when I say I don’t wanna…

For the last 3 months or so, guys have been brave and sliding into my DMs … but of course… either looking desperate, trying pick up lines, or showing their jealously as to the “age range” that I have made clear as to whom I will date. The video below pretty much speaks for itself… then let me continue…

I had no idea that so many guys over the age of 35 would be attacking me over my choice to date younger guys… and oh, hockey players. When I mentioned this it’s like all these guys older than 35 came out of the wood-works and had to ask me directly … and then some of them even were brave enough to shot their shot ( that I will give credit too!)
Now, I don’t have to validate my reasons for what I want and I don’t have to ask permission either. But what I will do is spell it out as clearly as I can.
1) Yes, I date guys who are 23-32 BUT I have dated guys that are 21 and 22… there are always exceptions to what I feel I want to do but with that said, don’t get your hopes up if you’re older than 35…(or 34) that rule of mine is staying put.

2) Cheerleaders belong with athletes. Period. We go together like peanut butter and jelly, cookies and milk, bread and butter… hello?! Yes, I know all about the stereotypical ideas put out there into the world about cheerleaders: ( They are dumb, they sleep around, they lack talent, blah blah blah) so trust me when folks hear that I used to be one and still in the industry men think they can easily “land me” but that’s not true at all. If anything, I am hard to “land” since I have high standards and will not go against those. I will gladly give an athlete a chance, but if he only thinks I deserve bare minimum, he’s got another thing coming! Yes, I don’t need to be nor want to be their 1st priority. Their 1st priority should be to their career/ team, but seriously there needs to be a BALANCE .
So trust me right now when I say, that if I like you, take that seriously as a compliment. I don’t need anyone to complete me, I WANT someone in my life to grow and build with… that’s the difference.

When guys say to me in DMs that the “only” reason I want to be a hockey player is because of how they “look physically” I giggle and roll my eyes. I don’t give a shit about a man’s hairline, if he has 6-pack abs, buns of steel, muscles, etc. .. that to me is a bonus, not a reason to want to date anyone. The mindset, attitude , character and personality of a hockey player is the main reason why I am attracted to them. Being that I am an ex-athlete and a current coach, I have the exact same mindset as they do… plus I understand the demands of their job, support them 125% and am as loyal as fuck (I have people who back me up on that BTW)


I have you all know that I ALWAYS NEVER dated: doctors, male nurses, lawyers, cops, firefighters, or guys in the military. Why? Well, doctors/nurses/lawyers hours are NUTS. They are NEVER around when you need them. Their jobs are demanding and oh, forget about kids… if I had kids with a guy who did one of those things for a living I would NEVER see him- neither would the kid. Vice Versa if a guy marries a female who does those things… a nanny mostly would be raising those kids! As for Cops, Firefighters and military dudes…their jobs are just way too dangerous and I would be a wreck worrying about them – that is not something I want to do.


Now, going back to the hockey player point being, as too what I am talking about in regards to personality, attitude and character;
look at this story on a hockey player and what he did for a fan: Click here to read the story
But to phrase this tweet: A couple weeks ago after a Columbus Blue Jackets victory, a guy witnessed a young girl bawling her eyes out while talking to a mutual friend in the concourse. He asked her what was wrong. She explained she was near glass waiting to get Korpi’s autographed stick. After he was announced as the first star, Korpi took a victory lap and pointed right at her, tossed the souvenir stick up over the glass. It landed in this little girl’s hands for a split second until someone behind her snatched it from her grip. She was inconsolable…. you can guess what the rest of the story is, right? This hockey player made it right. You hardly see that with other athletes unless it’s being recorded for their social media to show that “they care” This was NOT recorded. This happened and a guy told everyone on Twitter what an awesome dude Korpi was!

3) As asked in my DMs: “So, you’re just going to say no to other dudes who aren’t hockey players? Aren’t your standards to high?” My answer in a tweet: “You’re standards are too high” Well those standards protect me from low quality experiences. So I’m not afraid to say no! See, I know what I bring to the table. I am the prize. I am a rare breed. This is just another reason why folks should get off those dating apps… if you see what options are left, then you would understand NOT to settle just to settle. And remember what I have said previously, men marry the woman in front of them not necessarily the woman they are meant to be with because they settled when they should have said no. Here is that blog post

4) It’s always the most laid-back women made out to look complicated and crazy by a men who didn’t even try providing her with the basics of what she deserves. See, I don’t settle for bare minimum and NO ONE should settle for that- ever! I ALWAYS tell folks that if you think I am too much, go find less. ( BTW that is what you will find on a dating app)
Date someone who’s interested in you. And I don’t mean someone who finds you funny & cute. I mean someone who genuinely wants to get to know you. Find the person who wants to get to know every aspect of who you are because that is a keeper.

5) “So, you only want to then date guys from your favorite team, right?” Another fabulous DM I received the other day! And to answer it:
Well, maybe. The guys who shoot their shot GET a shot! And who’s to say that guys from other hockey teams are not in my DMs now? Um, hello! I don’t tweet out or post out WHO I am talking too… EVER. That’s a major rule of mine. Trustworthiness is something I take seriously and I don’t screenshot conversations either.
Like I said previously, it doesn’t matter how much I like a guy, if he ain’t up to task of at least getting to know me, I don’t chase, I replace.

6) “So, why young guys and not guys that are older?” Simply put: young guys want to grow, they want to build something, they want adventures and they are not afraid to leave their comfort zone as are older guys. Older men LIVE in their comfort zone. Older men try to “tame” me where younger guys enjoy my carefree spirit and the way I carry myself. I never have been with a younger guy (athletes) who cared so much about how smart I was, especially as a blonde, cared about me having my own company, or cared about how spontaneous I am at times. Older guys… ha!

7) Closing, if you follow me on Twitter you know that I love having conversation and my vibe I bring is very magnetic. (Hey, all these years doing cheerleading and dance brought that out in me.) I am ALWAYS open to meeting new people, no matter anyone’s age, and if you’re a guy and know that there is no chance in hell of ever dating me, but you enjoy having conversation on numerous topics, hit me up. I make a great platonic friend in that , I will always have your back. If anyone ever feels that they need someone to listen to them or needs advice, my DMs are always open.
I want to be the light for someone who feels that they don’t have that. Life is better when you are caring, compassionate and kind.

And you don’t need to date me in order for me to do that.


Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Why chase you when I’m the catch?

It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste. I say that with the question in mind, “How long do you give a guy whom you gave your number too, to actually use it before you say, Fuck it and move on?” It’s a known fact that most men will not call you the day after they meet you, for fear of being perceived as too eager or desperate. (Which is the SILLIEST thing a guy can do!)

Then of course women try to analyze WHY he hasn’t called and if he plans on calling, which is again, a stupid thing a woman can do. Now of course there are MANY scenarios as to why a guy won’t call. Let’s look at those:

1) When a guy doesn’t call, he might be preoccupied with work or other commitments. He might’ve not had the time or headspace to give you a call. It’s also possible that he’s too busy to focus on his personal life, especially if he’s someone who constantly gets overwhelmed with work or the schedule is too crazy for him to actually have time to call you or even text you for that matter.
2) They want to test you to see if you are going to chase them. Which if you read this blog, you know that my motto is: I don’t chase, I replace. NEVER chase a guy. First off, it’s a waste of energy and secondly it is a foolish game to play. Sometimes men think that showing emotions and expressing their interest will drive them away from the people they like. They’re trying to keep the mystery and interest alive by playing hard to get.
3) Research says phone anxiety might not be as uncommon as people think. If he’s someone who’s suffering from a social anxiety disorder, there’s a good chance that they feel very uncomfortable when calling you.  He is already insecure about himself and thinks you are freaking perfect, ( which NO ONE is, especially me, and he stupidly thinks he doesn’t deserve you!)
4) Men are NOT good with emotions. Period. They struggle with showing people how they feel and expressing themselves clearly so sometimes a guy doesn’t call or text a girl who shows him interest especially because HE IS interested in her as well.
5)He’s not into you. Yes, there is a serious possibility that is just isn’t into you and he is NEVER going to reach out. So, should you put all your eggs into one basket or move on to someone else?

You know how the story goes, you move on and have options, and he sees you with his friend, or someone he knows or even a complete stranger that is not him, and he panics and will text you. This then leads you to make a decision as to which guy you are going to choose. Which if you ask me is not a bad thing. I would continue to date the guy that you are entertaining while planning to then go out and meet for drinks with the guy whom you gave your number too. Let him point blank know that you are not exclusive but that you want to be exclusive and see what happens.


BUT- here is a tip for the guys. …

Men underestimate a silent female. If she is quiet and no longer interested in what you’re doing and she’s paying attention to another guy… she mostly is finished with you… and if you want her you are going to have to show it to her since he fumbled the bag and didn’t call you nor text you and it’s been OVER a month. Then by all means, let him walk. If he decides to mess it all up & lose the BEST thing to ever enter his life…that’s on him not you.

Also, on a different note, here is a men fact for the ladies to know: If a guy is criticizing another woman: Her looks, how she dresses, how she talks etc… He’s ATTRACTED to her. Period. You’re welcome.

Always know that you don’t chase, you attract. You’re the prize and 1 lucky guy is going to be thanking the guy that didn’t want to show interest in you and took a risk and dated you. That new guy is going to be so happy that you also were smart enough to know that you have options.

You can HAVE any guy your heart’s desire…. don’t settle on the one that is still unsure.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Let me touch your shirt so I can tell you if it’s boyfriend material.

Dating double standards are ridiculous.

The one that still stands out is that men are celebrated from dating a younger woman, but when the opposite happens, holy cow, let the jokes rip. Recently I read a tweet from a woman on Twitter questioning if it’s okay for her to date a younger man. Wait, what? You are asking permission from strangers if it’s okay to date a younger man? Seriously?

For women seeking men, though, old-fashioned gendered ideas around age still persist for many. So what are the pros and what the cons for this dating dilemma?

Asking women this question here are the top reasons why older women ( And by older we mean over 35 dating men in their 20s) want to date younger men:

Sarah: I find that younger guys are so much faster to have the ‘what are we’ conversation.

Jane: Younger men tend to have higher sex drives, And as women, our sex drives tend to peak in our 40s.

Cindy: Younger guys are just less complicated and a lot more fun. Older guys have been in long-term relationships, and some of them are even divorced. They have really complicated commitment issues.

Now here are some guys who tell me their reasons for wanting to date an older woman:

Joe: Honestly, they’re so much more emotionally and mature, not as insecure, and our conversations are incredible.

Tim: I am attracted to older women because they’re often more confident and authentic than the younger girls my age. They are the real-deal, so to speak.

Peter: The mature woman focuses less on trying to win me over and focuses more on enjoying my company. There are no “love games.”

Dan: When I meet a woman over 30, she’s usually very clear and focused. She knows what she wants in life and it makes being with her so much easier. I look at a lot of my friends who have girlfriends their age and younger and the problems they have strike me as ridiculous. They frequently act foolish and immature. I don’t have time for that drama—that’s why I like mature women.

Women want to date a man who will become a partner, not a project. We don’t need to “mama him” to death, and we don’t want a guy who plays games either. Most older guys come with baggage; and a lot of it. They constantly talk about previous relationships and why they didn’t commit, blah, blah, blah. Younger guys don’t come with all that garbage and they aren’t trying to sell you the reason you should give me a chance either. – They are confident, not insecure.

Here are a few Pros to a woman dating a younger man:

A younger man has more energy and is more willing to try things than his older counterparts. In turn, doing new things increases dopamine in the brain, triggering a desire to spend more time together and assisting in lighting your sexual fire. The pro: A longer span of time before he’s reaching for the Viagra.

Not only is there fire in the bedroom, but he’ll come up with creative date ideas that bring back romance and make you feel empowered and appreciated.

Less baggage many also mean he lacks experience with communicating. So, be selective about your battles and learn to compromise on things that aren’t vital to your relationship.

Cons (Depends on how you feel)

Younger guys like to hang out with their peers more often than older men. So be prepared to share him with his friends.

The reality is that your biological clock may be ticking away while his isn’t even be turned on. It might be years before he decides that he wants a family and then what? (This depends on how you both feel about kids- remember though, there is a thing called adoption as well.)

He may prefer texting you over calling you and he may get jealous faster seeing you talk to all the men you may know from your past or even your job.

Conclusively, If both parties are open to dating, you might have a blast with each other.. And it is entirely possible that you could fall in love with each other and have a long and happy relationship.

I should add though, older women are likely to have a stable career and be financially secure. So, when she chooses a partner, it tends not to be about wealth. She tends to be with someone she WANTS not someone she NEEDS and that is the one thing that separates the girls from the women. Women who are independent do just fine without a man, so if they want you, you must be pretty damn special to her! And being with someone who admires her, supports her and is 100% intrigued about her is exactly why it never seems to work out with older guys.

Because, as they say, age ain’t nothin’ but a number. You need to focus on finding the partner that is your perfect fit, regardless of age. ( Note: Legally over 18)