Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

The Silent Women Of The NHL

All last month I saw the NHL Public Relations Dept tweet out, “The NHL continues to celebrate Women in hockey…” and all I could think was, “What a load of crap!”

Why you ask?

Because it is a ploy to make you think that they 1) care about women at all and 2) a distraction from knowing or even thinking that the NHL is the ONLY professional league that does not have written policy to protect women in regard to sexual assault / domestic violence / sexual harassment – but no, let’s get the confetti and celebrate them! (Insert eye roll here) Not only that, but the women also that are in the NHL now, as wives and girlfriends are silent. Do you notice that? Do you notice that when you do have a woman who is married (or used to be married) speak up that woman is forced to stay silent and if they shall open their mouths, they are given, “The Scarlet Letter?”


As you will notice from some of these photos of the some of the women, they look literally identical. I sent a few people a photo of these two women, one is a GF and the other is about to marry a player on the SAME team. And the response I received were al the same, “They are sisters, right?” Ha! Nope. They are NOT related.


Here’s something interesting and I know it is going to rub some folks the wrong way but when the hell did that stop me? If you notice that almost all the women who are either dating or married to NHL players look alike. Now, the ones who are not the same “type” are the ones that knew their athlete when they were young and probably met in school or while they were in the AHL or even possibly out in the wide world. Those women are the women who aren’t in the mold they are “supposed to be” while the women who all look alike, are that for a simple reason or two: Its to keep the hockey culture alive and well and it is also easier to control a chick who is basic and practically the same than it is to control a woman who is different and extra. Some of the basic chicks don’t even realize this, but that NHL player ain’t with you because he “loves you and wants to build with you,” but because you are basic and easy to control. You will put up with his bullshit and NEVER say anything that goes against the grain.
Sorry but not sorry, that is the culture in a heartbeat.


Let’s talk about that for a second.

Think about how uniformed the military is for a minute. Everyone looks alike, everyone sounds alike, and everyone stays in line. What happens when you get out of line? If you break violations, there are consequences.

Think about Boston Bruins Wags for a minute ( Wags stands for Wives and girlfriends) The wife of Lucic suffered domestic violence and filed an assault charge but “miraculously” it was dropped back in February of this year because his agent and the team made it difficult for her to testify and the charges were dropped. But think about the WAGS whose job it is to ONLY smile, look pretty and be happy all the time.

NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN FROM THAT WAG GROUP SAID A DAMN THING ABOUT THIS.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN THAT WORKS WITHIN THE BRUINS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.

GARY BETMANN THE COMMISSONER DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP AND SAY THAT ASSAULT OF ANY KIND IS NOT TOLERATED IN THE NHL.

Why? Simple. It’s part of the NHL culture and it’s acceptable. So that is why the players go for basic chicks. A basic chick is EASY to control. A basic chick will not shake things up or cause a stir. A basic chick will not stand up for the other women in fear that they too can be assaulted or abused in any way. And of course, the guys will tell them to keep quiet because THEY DON’T WANT TO BE OSTRACIZED BY THE REST OF THE GUYS because “his woman” opened her mouth.

Think about Anna Kane for a minute. Everyone calls her “crazy” simply because she opened her mouth about domestic violence and how her daughter was taken away from her. The fact is, she is not crazy, what is crazy is that the truth she speaks triggers all those who want to live in this fake sexist world that is the NHL.
She needs to keep speaking her truth!

Something that I noticed from a NY Rangers wife on IG is the fact that she is AMAZING and she tries to have businesses and do things that make her happy outside of her husband’s hockey world. Every time she posts something where she goes off and does something amazing that she wanted to do she thanks her husband for, “Allowing me to be able to do it.” Um, excuse me? He “allowed” you do it? What are you, his slave? She should be allowed to do WHATEVER the fuck she wants to do. She is smart, beautiful and talented. She should not feel the need to thank him at all unless she is thanking him for support.

Another thing I noticed this past February. Jacob Trouba donated or painted some shit for Epilepsy NYC – His wife is a fucking doctor, and she is the photo you see below. The NHL public relations did NOT only MENTION her in the post, but didn’t even TAG HER! She knows MORE about Epilepsy than does the NHL and her husband Jacob! The reason is CLEAR why they didn’t mention her, it GOES AGAINST what the CULTURE is… and the sexism and misogyny at an ALL TIME HIGH!



And I won’t stop there. Sometimes these players pass around the SAME girl as they are appetizers. There is a guy on the Sharks that is married to a basic chick who dated another dude from a another team.

So before I continue let me qualify what a basic chick is or accepts for that matter. A basic chick accepts bare minimum at most. That’s it. Like I have said, they put up with the dudes bullshit. They never correct him, they are never supported publicly on social media or posted up, they never do anything else or demand to be treated better. They just accept basic treatment. The ones who are posted up are in a real relationship for the right reasons, the ones who aren’t, well, like I said, are only with him for the reasons that she is easy and breezy like I say below.

Why do you think I never “made it” dating an NHL player? Because I am extra and I am not going to sit there and let shit happen to the sisterhood that would be the WAGS. No way. I on the other hand, refuse to be tamed or groomed a certain way to “fit into the hockey culture”.
If you know me, you know that I protect all the people who are close to me. (Which isn’t that many but if you are in my circle, you are important to me.) I would though, as I have been told, would make an awesome hockey girlfriend, since I know the game inside out. I am a former cheerleader/ coach and I still work in the cheer industry so I know a thing or two about support and spreading positivity.

Now, I have NOTHING against a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom and just live off her husband’s means, if that is what she chooses to do. If a woman doesn’t want to better herself, that’s her prerogative. But I am saying here is the NHL doesn’t give women that option. You don’t see any woman who is married to a hockey player, who is a legend in her own right. For that matter you don’t even see hockey players on social media showing off their women like they’re proud of them, instead they hide them.
Did you know that 2 stars got married this year? Maker and Copp. But if you looked at their social media you wouldn’t even know that they were dating someone and the answer you get from guys as to why they hide their women from their social is a copout: “My life is private.” Yo, dude, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between people KNOWING you are with someone and KEEPING that person a SECRET. And oh, By the way, A NY Rangers player or two does the SAME SHIT! These women are posting up them in their stories (which is literally a story for another day) and not posting on their feed about the “love of their lives”


And then there is this: These women are afraid to speak up about ANYTHING.

Last year, a NY Rangers had a player whose wife needed In vitro fertilization. That must not have been an easy road, but she did it and had a precious son. She could have been a spokesperson, a representative for all women who struggle. She had the platform to do that. But all she did was an IG story, and that was it. Was she afraid to speak up? Was she told to keep that on the down low?

Women or the WAGS don’t speak up about ANYTHING! They are the silent women of the NHL. They are JUST there to LOOK pretty when they can bring SO much more to the table.

The rest of the women who work in the league also work in silence. Imagine working for Gary Betmann who has two daughters and needs to “stay in line” so she can keep her job, which by the way, is rare for a woman to be working in this league in the first place since 36% of women work in the male dominant sport.

If you are a guy and you are the one saying, “Well, why don’t these women just come forward?” Here’s my answer for you to digest. When women come forward you men, DON’T support them instead you QUESTION and ACCUSE the VICTIM of what she is saying because OH My God, he’s your “favorite’ athlete. If women told you they were attacked by a wild animal you would believe them, no strings attached, but when a women tells you that they are attacked by a man, you question it. The worst is when you say they are “just thirsty, or they wanted that,” Um, not every woman is after a man for his money and I don’t give a flying fuck what the girl is wearing, no girl is asking for it. Also, you guys think it’s a flex to hook up with many chicks and be with “really pretty girls” that is not a flex, that just shows how immature and unstable you guys really are.

Also, I will not validate my feelings on social. I am sorry if this triggers you but if it does, oh well.
If you planned on commenting or a woman dating/married to an NHLer says “We aren’t forced to be silent we just don’t want to distract him or the team… blah blah blah…” I call BS. It’s not that you are forced NOT to open your mouth, it’s that you are scared as shit to open your mouth with fear. And that is wrong.

The NHL culture is AGAINST women. If it weren’t the commissioner would not be against creating a written policy to protect women and their partners.
Sexism is ingrained in the NHL culture as it is to socialize young males with masculine ideals. The process encourages young guys to embody certain traits such as sexism and misogyny and they are subjected to policing tactics that ensure that EVERY SINGLE NHL PLAYER adopts this way of life.

The best the NHL could do is come up with a dumbass slogan, “Hockey is for everyone” is a load of crap, whereas we are talking about sexuality, sexism, and bullying. By the way, Canada is so grossly engaged in the culture of hockey, that is drives that Country’s funding and sport policies.

If current player’s voices are needed and yet they will not recognize how they have objectification of girls and women, how can sexism and misogyny ever be challenged and changed?

Today, you see so many NHL players publicly revealing their struggles with addictions, is connected to this NHL culture that HAS TO CHANGE. Also, what is connected to this culture is the fact that the players are with hyper masculine ideals and that they are not manly if they don’t play through an injury. It bears to also note that the challenge within the hockey culture is that the culture is intentional. The guys struggle for what it means to recognize such behaviors. There is no room for a view of what it means to be otherwise; you are either part of the culture or you are shun from ever making it in the league. There can be NO player who is bigger than the league itself. And when there is, he is not treated well. If the NHL really wanted to celebrate women as women SHOULD BE celebrated, then this culture of having women be a carbon copy of another woman should not be a “thing” in 2024. EVERY woman is special in her own right. EVERY woman deserves respect, appreciation and love for what THEY bring to the table AND not TOLD what to bring to the table.

Why do men of the NHL want woman to bring the exact same thing to the table? What the hell are they so freaking afraid of?

And as I type this, I can guarantee you that behind closed doors some of the women of the NHL are abused and assaulted. If there is one thing, I have learned about watching hockey for as long as I have it’s this: I can pick up on vibes of the players who need anger management. So, if a player on the ice doesn’t get his way and get all heated, don’t you think he brings home that same type of vibe?

Note: there is data that backs this up. Don’t believe me, go on Google and find it.

To summarize, the problem stems from inside the league and blooms all the way around the league. The first step to create change is simple: The League needs a written policy and the players need to start being accountable for it.

So, will women finally speak up and have a voice or will they “stay in line” and “behave” like all NHL players want them too?

Time will tell, but in 2024, the TIME IS NOW.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Break My Bed, Not My Heart

Here’s the problem… It’s two-fold.
The problem with having a genuine heart, is that people think you’re stupid. They may think they played you. But the whole time they played themselves out of meeting and being with a good person.
Athletes do this to themselves EVERY time. And us fans are STUPID for only expecting bare minimum from them just like women do for men that they date.
What is the bare minimum that fans except and think that the particular athlete is so ‘great’ to them?
All athletes NO MATTER the sport SHOULD freely sign autographs. Now, there are boundaries that fans should respect like if they are out with family and eating at a restaurant you don’t go up to the table while they are enjoying a meal begging for an autograph. But clearly when they are finished it is okay to ask. When they do events, before games, after games. BUT respectfully! If you placed yourself in this limelight by wanting to be a professional athlete, then THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR whether you like it or not! Period.
I laugh at seeing social media posts from athletes who literally COMPLAIN about this- um, hello you make millions of dollars and you can’t take 5 seconds to sign an autograph for a fan? Remind me again why you chose this occupation. ( insert roll eyes emoji here)
But then here’s the other side of the coin- ALL athletes get a swelled head and their ego is enlarged when they start to see folks ask them for autographs, the media talks about them, they see social media posts about them and then we start to idolize these dudes. This then makes them start to think that they are BETTER than the regular Joe and on the SAME playing field as a celebrity.
But here is why us fans SHOULD NOT idolize these guys. You have to remember rule one of marketing/branding: Rule one your image as an athlete is EVERYTHING. They are in fact their own brand, and what they do in front of the camera is what in fact makes fans idolize them.
How many times have you been on TwitterX or Instagram and seen your favorite player doing something for charity, or at a hospital, or at an event that is designed for them to look like they give a shit? The kicker is, I am SICK of hearing that this guys “really do in fact care” about us, the regular Joe. I am TIRED of hearing that they are “really great dudes” when their actions when the cameras are not involved are totally different.
Recently some hockey players did this charity thing called Shoulder Check in memory of Hayden Thorsen who loved hockey and excelled as a goalie in Darien, Connecticut. The 16-year-old died unexpectedly in May of 2022 and his family is using his passion for hockey to help Hayden’s legacy live on. The idea is wonderful. The mantra is reach out, check in and make contact. What a beautiful way to remember a kid who was that person who made sure others were okay. But to think that pro-hockey players from the NHL actually will “Reach out, check in and make contact” with fans who on social media maybe post things that are about mental health, or a fan that reaches out to a player to tell them how they love them, is UNREALISTIC to say the least!

The truth of the matter really is, that behind a screen you don’t know what ANYONE in life is dealing with and sure you can “study” their posts, and you can Google their name, but that is not going to give you who the REAL person REALLY is! People don’t live in their pasts anymore, they grow, adapt, change… and we ALL including the NHL players have skeletons in our closets that don’t define who we are today!

A friend of mine posted that Mika Zibanejad spent time signing autographs at the Shoulder Check and yes, he’s VERY good at doing this, and again, this is the bare minimum that fans have come to expect and not hold athletes to a higher standard. But his quote from the event was very telling, “You can see if you’re hurt physically sometimes but mentally, it’s very hard to see that and to see the signs.” Not true. Not true at all. I think most people ignore the mental signs because they just don’t want to deal with that.
So here are the signs that are as CLEAR CUT as daylight that people are experiencing a mental breakdown:

Symptoms of withdrawal

  • Not showing up for work for one or more days or calling in sick.
  • Missing scheduled appointments or social events.
  • Slipping into poor lifestyle habits like unhealthy eating, not getting enough sleep or can’t sleep, poor hygiene and not exercising.
  • Losing interest in activities or hobbies or things that brought you joy.
  • Not wanting to leave your home or be with others.

Symptoms of depression

  • Feeling very sad, hopeless, helpless or worried.
  • Being irritated, frustrated or having outbursts.
  • Having trouble concentrating.
  • Having thoughts of self harm or suicide.

Symptoms of anxiety

  • Feeling pain, fear and uneasiness.
  • Having nightmares.
  • Unable to remain still and calm.
  • Nausea
  • Heart palpitations
  • Cold or sweaty hands.
  • Dizziness.
  • Upset stomach.
  • Trembling or shaking.
  • Trouble breathing.
  • Panic Attacks.

See, we all see these signs but we pass them over as just “normal” when they are not normal. And do you really think a pro-athlete is going to 1) care and 2) check on fans? That to me ins unreasonable to even think! Most of the time they don’t even check on their teammates nor they deny that they are going through a rough patch because they don’t want to be seen as weak. Again, we have the male stereotypical concept, that a man is weak asking for help and men can’t show emotions.

Recently, if you read this blog or follow me on social media, you know that I have been asking Jacob Trouba, Vincent Trocheck and Ryan Lindgren to do a fun segment with me called “Coffee With The Captain (and teammates)- which is basically 30 minutes of talking about why they take their coffee the way they do, hockey questions I have and just plainly have a fun – fun questions like do you prefer Pretzels or Potato Chips- getting to know each other so I can see them OUTSIDE the RINK and WHO They TRULY are as PEOPLE. Well, I have been asking for 2months and they look at the videos and they ignore me. They treat me like I am trash. I’m not someone they “need” or who is “important” so they don’t even respond at all.

NOTHING exposes CHARACTER MORE than the way you TREAT people you don’t THINK you need.

My point is, STOP putting these guys on a pedestal when they don’t give a rats ass about you.

Remember, all they do in front of the cameras is JUST for SHOW – it’s not who they GENUINELY are.

And if this is not who they genuinely are, and they truly are the “good guys” then they respond to me and do the segment. Cause they care about people and they remember where they came from… Don’t worry, I ain’t holding my breath but I will find a NHL player who actually cares and who will do this with me.

The saying is true, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.”One should not judge the worth or value of something by its outward appearance alone. For example, “That man may look very small and insignificant, but don’t judge a book by its cover – he’s a very powerful man in his circle.“

Remember, karma, she’s a bitch. How you treat people will ALWAYS come back around to you.
And if this who Jacob, Vinny and Ryan genuinely are… then their true character has been exposed and it’s all a show as to who they pretend to be… But if this isn’t who they genuinely are, then they will do the fun segment with me. But make no mistake.. I will find a NHL player who will do the segment with me.
I have worked too hard to keep playing small.
I never will discount myself and my worth.
I deserve to be respected whether I am a celebrity or not.
I know what I bring to the table and I just raised the bar.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

What you know bout me? What you-what you know?

I introduce the following video for you to 1) Get to know a little bit more of me 2) I have been asking Jacob Trouba, Vincent Trocheck and Ryan Lindgren to do a segment with me called Coffee With The Captain and Teammates… ( I want to add Lexi but he is still a RFA)
So I created this video for them to get to know me and be more comfortable to get to know me….

BTW.. You can follow me on Twitter too! The link below is the video I posted there PLUS give me a follow!

Click Here

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

An Award Winning Presentation of The Recordings Of A Fangirl #sarcasm ( NYR ed)

The 2022 Davey Sliver Award Winning Podcast: The Recordings of a Fangirl #sarcasm NYR Ed 11/4/22

For the SPECIAL FASHION SEGMENT – I went back to 2016. We are starting with # 5 of the BEST Dressed NY Rangers that I talk on the #youtube above!

Here’s Brady Skjei;

Here are some of the guys from the team NOW:

Vinny T – That Tie makes the outfit complete. I just don’t like the shoes without socks look. But overall- A+

Here is Key ( Fashion Ave Baby!)

Here is my favorite look for Lindy and Laffy.
SWAGGER!!

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Sex Education 101

Being on Twitter and seeing people post things are not true has to be the most frustrating thing! Yes there are folks who tweet “sex facts” but they leave out the facts and just tweet opinions. One of the more taboo topics that many feel uncomfortable talking about is masturbation. A survey found that 54% of people don’t feel comfortable talking about masturbation; the other is orgasms.

Here are some straight up facts:

Masturbation Facts and Statistics

1- 95% of men admit to masturbating, compared to 89% of women. For married individuals, the rate is 70% for both men and women.
2- More than 40% of males and 22% of females admit to masturbating daily. 55% of men and 48% of women masturbate at least once a week.
3-The average time porn is watched in a hotel room is 12 minutes.

Studies done by Indiana U, We-Vibe, and Tenga found that one in three men think about a celebrity when they are masturbating. In comparison, only one in five women think about a celebrity while masturbating. 69% of men will watch pornography, listen to music, look at photos or use a vibrator each time they masturbate. In comparison, only 54% of females will do the same thing.  It should be noted that masturbating is not going out and “seeking sex” it is considered ” self-love” ( I use that term with a smirk) and … A recent study found that not only do 45 percent of couples watch porn together, but it’s a healthy way to bond. The study was published in The Archives of Sexual Behavior.

Communication about sex is a major component to a great relationship, and if you can work a mutual interest for porn into your sex life it’s not only a learning experience, but can add some spice to those vanilla positions.

Still, in 2022, though when people talk about sex, they talk about it from the male perspective only. In a few studies done in the past few years, we find that women perceived as more open to casual sex are attributed to having less morals and are seen as less smart than women are not so open to casual sex as men are. Greater female objectification may be prompted by observers’ negative stereotypes of promiscuous women. Focusing on a woman’s body promotes objectification and decreases perceptions of her mental capacity and moral status. The myth that it is completely normal for heterosexual men to see women to whom they are sexually attracted as sex objects needs to be retired. The notion that men can have as much casual sex as they want but women can not is absurd. Men are aroused just by glancing at a female arm, ankle, calf, thigh, stomach — even without ever seeing the woman’s face. Those legs, calves, arms, etc. are sexual objects. That’s why there are innumerable websites featuring them. There is nothing analogous for women. Of course, a woman can be aroused seeing a particularly handsome and masculine man. But there are no websites for women to stare at men’s legs or other male body parts. Women are told not to dress too sexy, because if they do then there must be “asking for it” when it fact women are not at all asking for anything, they do though have a right to dress however they desire. There is that myth that women have a little black dress and men have their little black book. Women wear the little black dress to into a man’s little black book. But again, no one ever views that little black dress as just a dress a woman loves or wants to wear, there is always a sexual thing attached to it. But one thing that remains constant year in and year out is the assumption that the female body exists, first and foremost, for male sexual and viewing pleasure. This idea, needs to retired faster than Tom Brady plans to retire at some point.

Here is the kicker: NOT every normal heterosexual man who sees a woman as a sexual object can also completely respect her mind, her character, and everything else non-sexual about her. You have athletes, mostly NFL and NBA who think its a flex to date and sleep with as many women as they want. That’s not the true flex. Women are not prized animals that are owned by a man, so why do we still focus on men as the sexual being and not the other way around?

Women are told to please a man. Men are not told to please women. About 75 percent of all women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone — that is without the extra help of sex toys, hands or tongue. And 10 to 15 percent never climax under any circumstances. On the other hand, It’s clear the male orgasm is strongly selected and it makes sense , if they don’t reach orgasm, they don’t leave offspring. That’s why all we see are articles on how men can be satisfied but not women. It would be helpful if women knew as much about their ‘clits’ as men do about their penises. Women needs time to get off and, foreplay is the most important thing. It helps in vaginal lubrication, which is required for deep penetration and better sexual experience. Your sexual activity doesn’t need to be longer, but better. Women can get the orgasm even without penetration.

It’s not something to be ashamed about either. It’s part of life and it is part of having an intimate relationship. Too much emphasis is placed on models of female sexuality that are created by Hollywood and the pornography industry. But to sort of act as if that’s all that needs to be done for women is just silly. This is a total denial of the facts.

Listen to the latest podcast: Talk about The New York Rangers – Relationships – and Why you should never let AGE dictate your life.

-Hello Love Where’s Cupid 2nd Ed
-Relationship Impossible