The book that everybody has been waiting for is finally arriving on your shelf soon .
more to come!
Just Gonna Leave This Here
Should I say, I told you so?
If you follow this blog or my podcast, you know that for over the past year I have been preaching and talking about how the NHL’s culture is very sexist and has a misogyny tone.
I have pointed out cases when this happened, not to mention my own experience. Well, today we found out that the New York Rangers and the NHL have been covering up ( Surprise… but not really) Artemi Panarin’s alleged sexual assault of a former MSG staffer.
The story which broke from Katie Strang, of the Athletic, which is the following: The Rangers and Artemi Panarin reached settlements in August 2024 with a former female employee regarding a sexual assault claim, stemming from a December 2023 incident where Panarin took the employee’s phone, and would not give it back to her until she came to his hotel room, where he allegedly pinned her down on a bed, she pushed him off, and left.
As also told by beat writer, Vince Mercogliano, The woman, who was not identified in the report, reached agreements with Panarin and MSG Sports, which included non-disclosure and no admission of wrongdoing clauses, and then left the company.
The Club retained an outside law firm to conduct an independent investigation, which the League was fully apprised of. We consider the matter closed,” the NHL said in a statement. The league and Rangers declined to say whether Panarin was disciplined regarding the situation.
The female employee felt she was treated unfairly, according to team sources, and she then informed the team about the alleged assault. In February 2021, Panarin stepped away from the team for personal reasons after a Russian newspaper reported claims he was involved in a physical altercation with a woman in Latvia that year.
It’s important to note that when the Rangers were investigating a separate matter involving the same employee giving “anti-anxiety medicine” to a player on a team flight. The Rangers’ social media employees were no longer permitted to travel with the team as a result.
It’s also important to note that Jess Isner, who was the social media admin for the Boston Bruins and the Phoenix Coyotes prior to being the social media admin of the New York Rangers from 2019-2023 is no longer the admin and all her social media has been deleted.
The public may not realize just how many victims of any crime blame themselves for their own victimization. Self blame is one of the most toxic forms of emotional abuse. It amplifies our perceived inadequacies, whether real or imagined, and paralyzes us before we can even begin to move forward. Seemingly innocent questions from family and friends can trigger self-doubt and prevent victims from reporting to police.
They may also question what they did wrong and believe it was their fault. Sexual harassment and assault can be a humiliating experience to recount privately, let alone publicly. Victims of sexual harassment and sexual assault in adulthood or sexual abuse in childhood tend to feel shame, because as human beings, we want to believe hat we have control over what happens to us. When that personal power is challenged by a victimization of any kind, we feel humiliated.
Another reason women don’t go to the police is that they fear of the repercussions when it comes to reporting sexual harassment or assault — fear of losing their job, fear they won’t find another job, fear they will be passed over for a promotion, fear of losing their credibility, fear of being branded a troublemaker, fear of being blackballed in their industry, fear of their physical safety, etc. The fact that sexual misconduct is the most under-reported crime is due to a common belief that women make up these stories for attention or to get back at a man who rejected them. Victims’ accounts are often scrutinized to the point of exhaustion.
Also women feel it is useless to come forward, because they have seen the way others have been treated. They feel it is hopeless, because they won’t be believed, and their reputations will be tainted, if not ruined. Women who have already been sexually assaulted or harassed feel especially helpless, since the chances are extremely high that they did not receive the justice they so desperately needed.
To all the men out there focusing so much energy on trying to figure out why victims don’t report, it would be far more productive to ask, “Why do we allow men to continue to sexually harass and assault women?”
FYI: Next Tuesday in a courtroom in London, Ont., five former members of Canada’s 2018 World Juniors team go on trial, 15 months after they were charged with sexual assault.
Michael McLeod, Carter Hart, Alex Formenton, Cal Foote, and Dillon Dube have all pleaded not guilty. McLeod faces a second sexual assault charge as a party to the offense.
And to those men who think what happened with Panarin wasn’t “sexual assault” there are 3 levels of sexual assault and it doesn’t always include sexual intercourse. Level 1 involves minor physical injuries or no injuries to the victim. Sexual assault Level 2: Sexual assault with a weapon, threats, or causing bodily harm. Aggravated sexual assault. Level 3: Sexual assault that results in wounding, maiming, disfiguring or endangering the life of the victim.
Follow me on X or IG for more updates and important information.
The Silent Women Of The NHL
All last month I saw the NHL Public Relations Dept tweet out, “The NHL continues to celebrate Women in hockey…” and all I could think was, “What a load of crap!”
Why you ask?
Because it is a ploy to make you think that they 1) care about women at all and 2) a distraction from knowing or even thinking that the NHL is the ONLY professional league that does not have written policy to protect women in regard to sexual assault / domestic violence / sexual harassment – but no, let’s get the confetti and celebrate them! (Insert eye roll here) Not only that, but the women also that are in the NHL now, as wives and girlfriends are silent. Do you notice that? Do you notice that when you do have a woman who is married (or used to be married) speak up that woman is forced to stay silent and if they shall open their mouths, they are given, “The Scarlet Letter?”
As you will notice from some of these photos of the some of the women, they look literally identical. I sent a few people a photo of these two women, one is a GF and the other is about to marry a player on the SAME team. And the response I received were al the same, “They are sisters, right?” Ha! Nope. They are NOT related.
Here’s something interesting and I know it is going to rub some folks the wrong way but when the hell did that stop me? If you notice that almost all the women who are either dating or married to NHL players look alike. Now, the ones who are not the same “type” are the ones that knew their athlete when they were young and probably met in school or while they were in the AHL or even possibly out in the wide world. Those women are the women who aren’t in the mold they are “supposed to be” while the women who all look alike, are that for a simple reason or two: Its to keep the hockey culture alive and well and it is also easier to control a chick who is basic and practically the same than it is to control a woman who is different and extra. Some of the basic chicks don’t even realize this, but that NHL player ain’t with you because he “loves you and wants to build with you,” but because you are basic and easy to control. You will put up with his bullshit and NEVER say anything that goes against the grain.
Sorry but not sorry, that is the culture in a heartbeat.
Let’s talk about that for a second.
Think about how uniformed the military is for a minute. Everyone looks alike, everyone sounds alike, and everyone stays in line. What happens when you get out of line? If you break violations, there are consequences.
Think about Boston Bruins Wags for a minute ( Wags stands for Wives and girlfriends) The wife of Lucic suffered domestic violence and filed an assault charge but “miraculously” it was dropped back in February of this year because his agent and the team made it difficult for her to testify and the charges were dropped. But think about the WAGS whose job it is to ONLY smile, look pretty and be happy all the time.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN FROM THAT WAG GROUP SAID A DAMN THING ABOUT THIS.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN THAT WORKS WITHIN THE BRUINS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.
GARY BETMANN THE COMMISSONER DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP AND SAY THAT ASSAULT OF ANY KIND IS NOT TOLERATED IN THE NHL.
Why? Simple. It’s part of the NHL culture and it’s acceptable. So that is why the players go for basic chicks. A basic chick is EASY to control. A basic chick will not shake things up or cause a stir. A basic chick will not stand up for the other women in fear that they too can be assaulted or abused in any way. And of course, the guys will tell them to keep quiet because THEY DON’T WANT TO BE OSTRACIZED BY THE REST OF THE GUYS because “his woman” opened her mouth.
Think about Anna Kane for a minute. Everyone calls her “crazy” simply because she opened her mouth about domestic violence and how her daughter was taken away from her. The fact is, she is not crazy, what is crazy is that the truth she speaks triggers all those who want to live in this fake sexist world that is the NHL.
She needs to keep speaking her truth!
Something that I noticed from a NY Rangers wife on IG is the fact that she is AMAZING and she tries to have businesses and do things that make her happy outside of her husband’s hockey world. Every time she posts something where she goes off and does something amazing that she wanted to do she thanks her husband for, “Allowing me to be able to do it.” Um, excuse me? He “allowed” you do it? What are you, his slave? She should be allowed to do WHATEVER the fuck she wants to do. She is smart, beautiful and talented. She should not feel the need to thank him at all unless she is thanking him for support.
Another thing I noticed this past February. Jacob Trouba donated or painted some shit for Epilepsy NYC – His wife is a fucking doctor, and she is the photo you see below. The NHL public relations did NOT only MENTION her in the post, but didn’t even TAG HER! She knows MORE about Epilepsy than does the NHL and her husband Jacob! The reason is CLEAR why they didn’t mention her, it GOES AGAINST what the CULTURE is… and the sexism and misogyny at an ALL TIME HIGH!
And I won’t stop there. Sometimes these players pass around the SAME girl as they are appetizers. There is a guy on the Sharks that is married to a basic chick who dated another dude from a another team.
So before I continue let me qualify what a basic chick is or accepts for that matter. A basic chick accepts bare minimum at most. That’s it. Like I have said, they put up with the dudes bullshit. They never correct him, they are never supported publicly on social media or posted up, they never do anything else or demand to be treated better. They just accept basic treatment. The ones who are posted up are in a real relationship for the right reasons, the ones who aren’t, well, like I said, are only with him for the reasons that she is easy and breezy like I say below.
Why do you think I never “made it” dating an NHL player? Because I am extra and I am not going to sit there and let shit happen to the sisterhood that would be the WAGS. No way. I on the other hand, refuse to be tamed or groomed a certain way to “fit into the hockey culture”.
If you know me, you know that I protect all the people who are close to me. (Which isn’t that many but if you are in my circle, you are important to me.) I would though, as I have been told, would make an awesome hockey girlfriend, since I know the game inside out. I am a former cheerleader/ coach and I still work in the cheer industry so I know a thing or two about support and spreading positivity.
Now, I have NOTHING against a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom and just live off her husband’s means, if that is what she chooses to do. If a woman doesn’t want to better herself, that’s her prerogative. But I am saying here is the NHL doesn’t give women that option. You don’t see any woman who is married to a hockey player, who is a legend in her own right. For that matter you don’t even see hockey players on social media showing off their women like they’re proud of them, instead they hide them.
Did you know that 2 stars got married this year? Maker and Copp. But if you looked at their social media you wouldn’t even know that they were dating someone and the answer you get from guys as to why they hide their women from their social is a copout: “My life is private.” Yo, dude, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between people KNOWING you are with someone and KEEPING that person a SECRET. And oh, By the way, A NY Rangers player or two does the SAME SHIT! These women are posting up them in their stories (which is literally a story for another day) and not posting on their feed about the “love of their lives”
And then there is this: These women are afraid to speak up about ANYTHING.
Last year, a NY Rangers had a player whose wife needed In vitro fertilization. That must not have been an easy road, but she did it and had a precious son. She could have been a spokesperson, a representative for all women who struggle. She had the platform to do that. But all she did was an IG story, and that was it. Was she afraid to speak up? Was she told to keep that on the down low?
Women or the WAGS don’t speak up about ANYTHING! They are the silent women of the NHL. They are JUST there to LOOK pretty when they can bring SO much more to the table.
The rest of the women who work in the league also work in silence. Imagine working for Gary Betmann who has two daughters and needs to “stay in line” so she can keep her job, which by the way, is rare for a woman to be working in this league in the first place since 36% of women work in the male dominant sport.
If you are a guy and you are the one saying, “Well, why don’t these women just come forward?” Here’s my answer for you to digest. When women come forward you men, DON’T support them instead you QUESTION and ACCUSE the VICTIM of what she is saying because OH My God, he’s your “favorite’ athlete. If women told you they were attacked by a wild animal you would believe them, no strings attached, but when a women tells you that they are attacked by a man, you question it. The worst is when you say they are “just thirsty, or they wanted that,” Um, not every woman is after a man for his money and I don’t give a flying fuck what the girl is wearing, no girl is asking for it. Also, you guys think it’s a flex to hook up with many chicks and be with “really pretty girls” that is not a flex, that just shows how immature and unstable you guys really are.
Also, I will not validate my feelings on social. I am sorry if this triggers you but if it does, oh well.
If you planned on commenting or a woman dating/married to an NHLer says “We aren’t forced to be silent we just don’t want to distract him or the team… blah blah blah…” I call BS. It’s not that you are forced NOT to open your mouth, it’s that you are scared as shit to open your mouth with fear. And that is wrong.
The NHL culture is AGAINST women. If it weren’t the commissioner would not be against creating a written policy to protect women and their partners.
Sexism is ingrained in the NHL culture as it is to socialize young males with masculine ideals. The process encourages young guys to embody certain traits such as sexism and misogyny and they are subjected to policing tactics that ensure that EVERY SINGLE NHL PLAYER adopts this way of life.
The best the NHL could do is come up with a dumbass slogan, “Hockey is for everyone” is a load of crap, whereas we are talking about sexuality, sexism, and bullying. By the way, Canada is so grossly engaged in the culture of hockey, that is drives that Country’s funding and sport policies.
If current player’s voices are needed and yet they will not recognize how they have objectification of girls and women, how can sexism and misogyny ever be challenged and changed?
Today, you see so many NHL players publicly revealing their struggles with addictions, is connected to this NHL culture that HAS TO CHANGE. Also, what is connected to this culture is the fact that the players are with hyper masculine ideals and that they are not manly if they don’t play through an injury. It bears to also note that the challenge within the hockey culture is that the culture is intentional. The guys struggle for what it means to recognize such behaviors. There is no room for a view of what it means to be otherwise; you are either part of the culture or you are shun from ever making it in the league. There can be NO player who is bigger than the league itself. And when there is, he is not treated well. If the NHL really wanted to celebrate women as women SHOULD BE celebrated, then this culture of having women be a carbon copy of another woman should not be a “thing” in 2024. EVERY woman is special in her own right. EVERY woman deserves respect, appreciation and love for what THEY bring to the table AND not TOLD what to bring to the table.
Why do men of the NHL want woman to bring the exact same thing to the table? What the hell are they so freaking afraid of?
And as I type this, I can guarantee you that behind closed doors some of the women of the NHL are abused and assaulted. If there is one thing, I have learned about watching hockey for as long as I have it’s this: I can pick up on vibes of the players who need anger management. So, if a player on the ice doesn’t get his way and get all heated, don’t you think he brings home that same type of vibe?
Note: there is data that backs this up. Don’t believe me, go on Google and find it.
To summarize, the problem stems from inside the league and blooms all the way around the league. The first step to create change is simple: The League needs a written policy and the players need to start being accountable for it.
So, will women finally speak up and have a voice or will they “stay in line” and “behave” like all NHL players want them too?
Time will tell, but in 2024, the TIME IS NOW.
In a world full of copies, be an original.
It’s been awhile since I wrote a blog piece, but I have a great excuse… I’ve been busy trying to get my shit together, but seriously who hasn’t been?
I have been working on multiple projects and I will have updates for ya soon. If you want instant behind the scenes stuff, then I invite you to follow my Youtube Channel where most of that is posted.
Recently I was back doing choreography for an upcoming R&B singer – and that felt awesome to be dancing again because here’s a hint from a creative person, when you do anything creative whether it is writing, music, art, dancing, etc.. it helps build up your creative juices! I think I will be doing more of that in the future!
And speaking of music, I am still putting together my album. It’s crazy to see how life really does go full circle. Back in the 2000’s ( the early portion) I actually was trying for a record deal even if I didn’t sing the songs but sell the music/lyrics to artists. Back then we didn’t have social media to do that, we needed to make a tape, mail it to a producer and then literally wait by the mailbox, which is was TORTURE! My cousin had a meeting with the same producer I sent my work too and that is how I found out that they loved my stuff. But … a lot of things how to fall into place and well, it didn’t.
Seeing now how God/universe was redirecting me and protecting me from the music industry now that we see all the shit unfolding with Diddy, makes me know that the timing was not right then. But like I said, everything in life comes full circle and now is the perfect time for me to have an album that I will produce by myself with the help of technology.
UPDATE:
So, the NHL is trying their “best” to make it look like they are “women friendly” and care about women by having women take part of organizations in a big way. The biggest way is with the Kraken and the hiring of Jessica Campbell as their Asst. Coach. Now, I will say she qualifies for this position and frankly she should have been hired years ago, so I question the timing of this. Especially with the fact that 5 guys are being tried in a Canadian court room next spring for sexual assault.
But this is here why the NHL SHOULD HAVE a policy to PROTECT HER.
The NHL commissioner STILL refuses! so what happens when she is sexually harassed? God forbid anything worse happens! I have sent The NHL over 4 correspondence and I have only heard back once! This month is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Here are some important stats:
Over 1 in 3 women in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.
At least 5 million acts of domestic violence occur annually to women aged 18 years and older.
Domestic abuse can be mental, physical, economic or sexual in nature.
And here’s something else to know: Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where a person causes someone to question their sanity, memories, or perception of reality.
** I will be staying on top of this with the NHL **
Video Links: Remembering Johnny Hockey
Video Links: Matt Rempe ( his acting debut) – If you listen to my podcast, you hear me talk about how much I love his vibe! It’s authentic and real, not fake or stuck up like all other athletes.
This week BTW on my podcast which I do NFL picks, and talk about hockey (NY Rangers- mostly) I talked about positive and negative energy towards the end of the podcast. It’s really a good listen if you want to learn how to have the Championship Mindset.
Podcast link: click here
The NHL and it’s Misogynist Behavior
It’s no secret that A) I am a hockey fan and B) have had my share of controversy with my podcast – which I will mention later, but in its creepy, disgusting way, is all tied together.
For those who aren’t hockey fans, there was a story that broke last week in regards to a sexual assault on a female back in 2018 at the World Junior Championship with Team Canada.
Here’s the background on this case:
In March of 2023, TSN’s Rick Westhead reported that The Heritage Committee had unanimously voted for a motion directing Hockey Canada to hand over law firm Henein Hutchison’s final report detailing its investigation into the alleged sexual assault.
Police investigators in London, Ont., said in December of 2022 that they had “reasonable grounds” to believe that five members of the 2018 Canada World Juniors hockey team sexually assaulted a woman in a hotel room after a Hockey Canada fundraising gala, according to a court filing to the Ontario Court of Justice.
The sexual assault allegations initially were investigated by London Police in 2018, however, the case was closed in February 2019 without any charges. The investigation was reopened in 2022.
In April of 2022, a woman filed a lawsuit against Hockey Canada, the Canadian Hockey League, and eight unnamed CHL players, stating she was sexually assaulted in a London, Ont. hotel room in June of 2018 following a Hockey Canada event.
The woman elected not to name any of the players involved, and stated in her original claim that it was eight “players for, and members of the CHL and Hockey Canada, including but not limited to members of the Canada U20 Men’s Junior Hockey Team.”
According to the lawsuit, the woman met the players at a bar, who were in London, Ont. for the Hockey Canada Foundation Gala & Golf event on June 18, 2018. She met one of the players, who is referred to as John Doe 1, who bought her alcoholic beverages. The woman said she was separated from her friend group as she became more intoxicated and eventually left the bar and went to a hotel with John Doe 1.
At the hotel, the two ” engaged in sexual acts” in John Doe 1’s hotel room. The woman said that after this, “John Doe 1 invited the remainder of the John Doe defendants into the room without the knowledge or consent of the Plaintiff.”
The woman said in the claim that over the next several hours, John Does 1-8 engaged in several sexual acts “which collectively constituted sexual abuse and assault of the Plaintiff.” During these assaults, “the Plaintiff experienced an ongoing apprehension of imminent physical harm of a sexual nature. The actions of the John Doe Defendants caused terror and fear in the Plaintiff’s mind.”
In the claim, the woman states that she could not give consent to any of the actions because of how intoxicated she was. In addition, the group of eight would not let her leave the room, despite multiple attempts by the victim.
The woman claimed that Hockey Canada knew about the allegations and did nothing about them.
Hockey Canada stated on Dec. 20 that their investigation had concluded and an adjunction panel would determine if any sanctions need to be imposed. They would keep the results confidential as the London Police continues with its investigation.
In addition, Hockey Canada said last year that no player from the 2018 World Juniors team is eligible to play for Canada’s national team in any IIHF event for the foreseeable future. ”Senior officials at Hockey Canada… claimed they didn’t know who was involved. It was a statement as ridiculous as it was disheartening and sickening.”
After the initial closing of the investigation, Hockey Canada began to receive backlash from Canada’s political figures and sponsors, in addition to fans of the sport. Especially since they quietly paid off the woman involved.
The NHL said it would conduct its own independent investigation into what happened because some active players were on that team and attended the gala. Commissioner Gary Bettman pledged to release the findings once completed, but as we saw with the hush hush and lack of transparency with what went down with the Blackhawks, we know fully well that this too will be “swept under the rug”
It’s disappointing the NHL doesn’t have the guts to own it, instead putting out a potential new franchise in Utah, to deflect from this breaking story, it’s pathetic really. And what I think far worse is the timing of how the NHL released it “mental health awareness” campaign to allow guys to have a leave of absence from their team and that too, was used to protect the five guys that are being charged with rape. The five guys are: NHL players Michael McLeod and Cal Foote of the New Jersey Devils, Carter Hart of the Philadelphia Flyers and Dillon Dubé of the Calgary Flames. Former NHL player Alex Formenton, who now plays with Swiss club HC Ambrì-Piotta, is the fifth player. Which brings me to the male fans disgusting reaction to this on social media.
This is why women don’t want to speak up. Being raped is the one of the WORST things a woman can feel and go through and these men on social media are more concerned about their hockey teams, defending the guys, and to me, the teams who knew about this and covered it up helped move the players around is despicable.
As a woman I can vouch that we are taught how to defend ourselves against being raped, when how about we actually teach men NOT TO RAPE!?
Of course women who are hockey fans have to endure being called, “puckbunnies” because yeah, heaven forbid a girl likes the sport for the sport. What these aholes on social media don’t realize is that throwing around a term like “puck bunny” is the same as calling them a slut…it’s not any classier and it certainly doesn’t make you look like any more of a real fan- it actually makes you look like loser!
Most guys feel threaten, by a female who know her shit and is not afraid to tell it. As if women don’t face enough struggle earning respect period in the world today, in the sport of hockey it is 100% worse! Men should be less worried about women making them look bad all awhile they are looking like a catty high schooler for being concerned with their ‘extracurricular activities’. ( I say that with a lot of sarcasm!)
Sexism is no stranger in hockey as it has been in football and even baseball.
The hockey PR departments ACROSS the league HATE women. Yes, I said it and I stick with it. 62% of men are employed by NHL teams while a whopping 37% are women. Not surprised. And if you look at their roles, that’s even worse.
Women work the sidelines/benches. Do you see women on TNT at the desk? Do you see women on ESPN at the desk? Do you see women as the an analyst?
Do you see any woman in a high ranking position?
How many females do you think do an NHL podcast and are promoted by the NHL?
If you scope out X , you will find thousands of podcasts done by males, and their guests are usually who…. Other males.
On my podcast, I had male guests. For example, one of them a crazy fan, and another was another podcast trying to get big names on his. He told me that he was going to have me on his podcast as that was the deal- I’d be on his he be on mine…. Do you think I was ever on his?
Because men don’t want to hear women talk hockey .
If you look at some of the women that are hired …. The blonde chicks mind you. That’s the reason they are hired for their looks not for their intelligence. Women are hired so it doesn’t look like they are being discriminated against when, in fact, women are constantly discriminated against in the world of the national hockey league.. they even have this fake special day called women empowerment day…. Like they give two shits about women.
Going back to my podcast, And the guy that I knew in the PR department for the New York Rangers…. He knew Exactly that I was asking to have Jacob Trouba on my podcast, constantly ignored me, never responded, and then when the controversy hit X, instead of reaching out to me, like a man would do to see if he could fix anything or apologize, he unfollowed me on Instagram, unfollowed me on Facebook to pretend, as if he never knew who I was…. Oh I have screenshots..
Trouba on the other hand, knew I was asking for him to be on my podcast, and instead of being a man and reaching out to me, decided to go on a podcast with men at the helm. Trouba showed you that he is sexist against women just as the PR department is…. Just as the New York Rangers organization is….. oh, and by the way, there is a sexual assault lawsuit against the owner, James Dolan.
I’ve always thought of James Dolan, as a very savvy businessman….. but you can kind of tie everything that’s happened with women in the Knicks and the Rangers organizations together…. don’t forget he’s also had Isaiah Thomas who was accused of sexual harassment, and then put him in charge of the WNBA’s team that used to play at MSG. He showed a lot of disregard for women.
It would be a smart move for James Dolan if he actually showed some concern for women, and what women have to go through to be in sports industry. It would also make him look better with the news coming out of his sexual assault lawsuit.
But you won’t see any other guy on the New York Rangers stand up against Trouba or stand up against what the New York Rangers PR department has done or for that matter stand up for women. No, they’ll just wear those stupid purple jerseys in March for women’s empowerment, and then auction them off for “charity”
That’s the sad part.
And fans are no better.
Fashion On Fire
There’s fashion, and then there is fashion that is fire.
Trending so far this season we have seen a lot of old trends coming back, like fake leather leggings which please should be illegal they are so freaking ugly. And seeing color be the main topic with cranberry making a huge comeback along with different shades of brown, purple, and blue.
For men here is the latest video of NY Rangers hockey boys dressed for success
CLICK HERE
Then for the women… fashion trends seem to be very hot, very sultry, very sexy. Here are the fashion shows I went to and the videos I created from them as a content creator/fashion blogger:
AND INTRODUCING…. MY Sassy Style Brand …. Just in time for the holidays!
This video is a sample, but you can CLICK HERE to go directly to my online store.
MORE FASHION TO COME!
Break My Bed, Not My Heart
Here’s the problem… It’s two-fold.
The problem with having a genuine heart, is that people think you’re stupid. They may think they played you. But the whole time they played themselves out of meeting and being with a good person.
Athletes do this to themselves EVERY time. And us fans are STUPID for only expecting bare minimum from them just like women do for men that they date.
What is the bare minimum that fans except and think that the particular athlete is so ‘great’ to them?
All athletes NO MATTER the sport SHOULD freely sign autographs. Now, there are boundaries that fans should respect like if they are out with family and eating at a restaurant you don’t go up to the table while they are enjoying a meal begging for an autograph. But clearly when they are finished it is okay to ask. When they do events, before games, after games. BUT respectfully! If you placed yourself in this limelight by wanting to be a professional athlete, then THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR whether you like it or not! Period.
I laugh at seeing social media posts from athletes who literally COMPLAIN about this- um, hello you make millions of dollars and you can’t take 5 seconds to sign an autograph for a fan? Remind me again why you chose this occupation. ( insert roll eyes emoji here)
But then here’s the other side of the coin- ALL athletes get a swelled head and their ego is enlarged when they start to see folks ask them for autographs, the media talks about them, they see social media posts about them and then we start to idolize these dudes. This then makes them start to think that they are BETTER than the regular Joe and on the SAME playing field as a celebrity.
But here is why us fans SHOULD NOT idolize these guys. You have to remember rule one of marketing/branding: Rule one your image as an athlete is EVERYTHING. They are in fact their own brand, and what they do in front of the camera is what in fact makes fans idolize them.
How many times have you been on TwitterX or Instagram and seen your favorite player doing something for charity, or at a hospital, or at an event that is designed for them to look like they give a shit? The kicker is, I am SICK of hearing that this guys “really do in fact care” about us, the regular Joe. I am TIRED of hearing that they are “really great dudes” when their actions when the cameras are not involved are totally different.
Recently some hockey players did this charity thing called Shoulder Check in memory of Hayden Thorsen who loved hockey and excelled as a goalie in Darien, Connecticut. The 16-year-old died unexpectedly in May of 2022 and his family is using his passion for hockey to help Hayden’s legacy live on. The idea is wonderful. The mantra is reach out, check in and make contact. What a beautiful way to remember a kid who was that person who made sure others were okay. But to think that pro-hockey players from the NHL actually will “Reach out, check in and make contact” with fans who on social media maybe post things that are about mental health, or a fan that reaches out to a player to tell them how they love them, is UNREALISTIC to say the least!
The truth of the matter really is, that behind a screen you don’t know what ANYONE in life is dealing with and sure you can “study” their posts, and you can Google their name, but that is not going to give you who the REAL person REALLY is! People don’t live in their pasts anymore, they grow, adapt, change… and we ALL including the NHL players have skeletons in our closets that don’t define who we are today!
A friend of mine posted that Mika Zibanejad spent time signing autographs at the Shoulder Check and yes, he’s VERY good at doing this, and again, this is the bare minimum that fans have come to expect and not hold athletes to a higher standard. But his quote from the event was very telling, “You can see if you’re hurt physically sometimes but mentally, it’s very hard to see that and to see the signs.” Not true. Not true at all. I think most people ignore the mental signs because they just don’t want to deal with that.
So here are the signs that are as CLEAR CUT as daylight that people are experiencing a mental breakdown:
Symptoms of withdrawal
- Not showing up for work for one or more days or calling in sick.
- Missing scheduled appointments or social events.
- Slipping into poor lifestyle habits like unhealthy eating, not getting enough sleep or can’t sleep, poor hygiene and not exercising.
- Losing interest in activities or hobbies or things that brought you joy.
- Not wanting to leave your home or be with others.
Symptoms of depression
- Feeling very sad, hopeless, helpless or worried.
- Being irritated, frustrated or having outbursts.
- Having trouble concentrating.
- Having thoughts of self harm or suicide.
Symptoms of anxiety
- Feeling pain, fear and uneasiness.
- Having nightmares.
- Unable to remain still and calm.
- Nausea
- Heart palpitations
- Cold or sweaty hands.
- Dizziness.
- Upset stomach.
- Trembling or shaking.
- Trouble breathing.
- Panic Attacks.
See, we all see these signs but we pass them over as just “normal” when they are not normal. And do you really think a pro-athlete is going to 1) care and 2) check on fans? That to me ins unreasonable to even think! Most of the time they don’t even check on their teammates nor they deny that they are going through a rough patch because they don’t want to be seen as weak. Again, we have the male stereotypical concept, that a man is weak asking for help and men can’t show emotions.
Recently, if you read this blog or follow me on social media, you know that I have been asking Jacob Trouba, Vincent Trocheck and Ryan Lindgren to do a fun segment with me called “Coffee With The Captain (and teammates)- which is basically 30 minutes of talking about why they take their coffee the way they do, hockey questions I have and just plainly have a fun – fun questions like do you prefer Pretzels or Potato Chips- getting to know each other so I can see them OUTSIDE the RINK and WHO They TRULY are as PEOPLE. Well, I have been asking for 2months and they look at the videos and they ignore me. They treat me like I am trash. I’m not someone they “need” or who is “important” so they don’t even respond at all.
NOTHING exposes CHARACTER MORE than the way you TREAT people you don’t THINK you need.
My point is, STOP putting these guys on a pedestal when they don’t give a rats ass about you.
Remember, all they do in front of the cameras is JUST for SHOW – it’s not who they GENUINELY are.
And if this is not who they genuinely are, and they truly are the “good guys” then they respond to me and do the segment. Cause they care about people and they remember where they came from… Don’t worry, I ain’t holding my breath but I will find a NHL player who actually cares and who will do this with me.
The saying is true, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.”One should not judge the worth or value of something by its outward appearance alone. For example, “That man may look very small and insignificant, but don’t judge a book by its cover – he’s a very powerful man in his circle.“
Remember, karma, she’s a bitch. How you treat people will ALWAYS come back around to you.
And if this who Jacob, Vinny and Ryan genuinely are… then their true character has been exposed and it’s all a show as to who they pretend to be… But if this isn’t who they genuinely are, then they will do the fun segment with me. But make no mistake.. I will find a NHL player who will do the segment with me.
I have worked too hard to keep playing small.
I never will discount myself and my worth.
I deserve to be respected whether I am a celebrity or not.
I know what I bring to the table and I just raised the bar.
No- my attitude hasn’t changed. You’re just seeing me for the first time.
The exciting news is finally out: My Website is complete! Yes… ALL my links are in ONE place!
Click here to check it out!
Fashion, Fun, Fitness, Cheerleading, and Shop links are all there. Not to mention my social media company’s link is there if you need to purchase content! PLUS you can hire me to do a personal cheer for you, friends, family, teammates, etc! Yes, I am on Cameo!
I will NEW dating blog coming out soon- oh my God the stories I have from girls on dating apps… holy moly… also I have a few cool project announcements that I am working on.
Ohh.. here’s a video for Ryan Lindgren. Click to watch
Update: Still waiting to hear from Jacob Trouba in regards to doing coffee with the captain. I even suggested he bring Vinny and of course Ryan with him so maybe then they would be comfortable doing it with each other and also Ryan could meet me in a fun setting so he would be comfortable too… I want them to have fun with the segment but I know it’s not a comfy thing for some dudes.. ya know with a girl.
But I guess Jacob’s tongue is tied up at the moment… ( insert eye roll) but if I was a guy and I asked him to do a podcast segment with me, I’d probably would have heard from him by now and wouldn’t have to keep asking. So don’t tell me if you are guy reading this that is not true, because women STILL aren’t accepted in certain scenarios where sports are concerned.
People ask me how I plan on doing the segment and that’s an easy answer! I will record it ( audio only ) and of course a few photos and a teaser video that is like 30 seconds. I am not planning of videoing this… first off WAY too long and audio is enough.
Oh, I am still waiting to see Alexis Lafrenière to sign his contract.. would LOVE to add him to the segment too.
OHHHH… Can’t believe I forgot to mention this…
Follow me on Twitter if you want to see some REALLY Fun Hot Mess Summer videos and yes I will tag those who need to be tagged!
I really am not posting them on IG.. but I will put them in my stories to get to Twitter. Although I have this really cool idea to post a reel that has me doing…. nah, why spoil it?
It’s a Hot Mess Summer
Yesterday I got the keycard to my office space for my company in NYC on 5th freaking avenue!!
So..What’s a hot mess summer you ask?
Well, it’s me being my real self, no photoshop, going out and living my best summer’s life! Usually you see girls talk about a hot girl summer, but I say fuck that shit! Seriously, we should love who we are and not try to be this fake person just to be accepted by society. All the girls who have hot girl summers do the same shit: generally characterized by an emphasis on promiscuity, immodesty, and partying. Having a “hot girl summer” means not being tied down by a boyfriend, dressing “hot”, and living wild.
I hate to burst everyone’s bubble on that, but having a hot mess summer is all about being confident, having fun and not caring what others think. It’s going out there and living your best life.
June 23rd it started at LBI … my family has a house there and I spent some time relaxing and spending time with my parents, brother, sister in law, niece and nephew. We had a good time. We went to the arcade and I actually won a stuffed animal from those claw games! My nephew won his lava lamp while my niece won her pink pillow friend. It was a blast.
July 4th was about my neighborhood and watching these really cool fireworks they let off. Also went shopping , spent time watching Christmas movies ( Christmas in July) and also I do love to read in the summer. I also started painting my seashells. I paint the inside of the shell ( I will have to post a photo on Twitter)
July 7th – Yesterday – I went to NYC to get my keycard for my office space I will be using for a slew of projects. It’s on 5th Ave and it is so freaking awesome! I posted some photos on Twitter, IG and Threads.
I have ALWAYS been a city girl ever since I was 14. I worked back in the city in my early 20s and since then I have been in love with NYC. It’s where I belong and I am doing everything that my soul finds joy in. And the best part is the office building has summer networking events and stuff, so I get to meet new people which I love to do!
I have started asking Jacob Trouba, Ryan Lindgren and Vincent Trocheck from the NY Rangers to do a FUN segment with me for yes my podcast and this blog called Coffee With The Captain and Teammates… but of course, it’s going to be a cruel summer with them. Oh, I also asked Jack Hughes, Dawson Mercer and Nico Hischier of the NJ Devils too, ( the 3 cutest on the NJD- the guys on the NYR are hot but a competition is always good. And oh, yeah, I got options.)
I am a cheerleader, cheerleading coach/choreographer so like duh.. this segment is going to be the most gimme a F-U-N these guys will EVER have.. that is a guarantee. Heck, if they want I will bring my poms and do a cheer for them.
If these dudes want to break Twitter and IG… they will if they are smart enough to say yes to me.
I also started writing the follow up to my book, “The Diary of a Drama Queen” where one of my old haters decided to leave me a bad review on my book. Seriously, I get a kick out that. I have a couple of those that seem to “follow” my every move. If you can believe it, from the Twitter War of 2010 -2011 this girl STILL is obsessed with me and tried to follow my youtube channel and IG account. Like my god… SO, yeah I have fans and a haters club. (I say this as sassy as I can… lucky me)
I also am on Cameo… here’s my link if you want to hire me to send a cheer to anyone… or if you need that comeback for your social media troll.
CLICK HERE
Until next time…
Big Boy Season In Full Effect
These guys have had it going on all season long, but the one pet peeve, the no-no in fashion is the fact that they are wearing dress shoes without socks… and they don’t look like they are wearing no-show socks either.
You should not wear dress shoes without socks- here are the reasons:
1) Your feet contain more sweat glands than any other part of your body, causing your feet to produce a great deal of sweat. When wearing no socks with dress shoes, this moisture will accumulate and cause your dress shoes to become a breeding ground for bacteria. Warm, damp, and dark environments like this allow for the growth of bacteria that causes fungal infections such as athlete’s foot. Wearing a quality pair of socks with dress shoes will allow your feet to stay comfortable, dry and healthy.
2) The development of bacteria in your dress shoes will also cause them to smell. This stench is unpleasant and extremely hard to remove from your shoes once it has developed.
3) Without wearing socks, excessive moisture in your dress shoes will cause the leather to prematurely wear. Given that your dress shoes are likely the most expensive shoes in your closet, be sure to always wear socks with them. Or try the no-show sock look.
Stephanie 's Corner 