I’m not high maintenance, you’re just low effort #facts

On my podcast, “The Recordings of A Fan girl #sarcasm, I talk about dating, relationships and I mention athletes A LOT with their relationships and dating no-nos. As both the NFL and NHL start up again on September 11th, I thought hey, let’s review some past tips and past stories this week on my podcast.
Here though, I will mention a few goodies.

Click Here to see the screen shot I will be now referring to:

This here is the shit I have to deal with all the time! Dumb ass guys trying to disguise themselves on line to either: A: Hit on me B: Ask dumbass questions C: Think that they are being clever D: This guy actually thinks this here is a pick up line ( which is scary!)

Like I have mentioned here and on my podcast athletes have burner accounts and sometimes they make them so damn obvious too. Not only do they have burner accounts, but they also try their best to disguise themselves on dating apps like Tinder for example. The ones I have seen are NFL players pretending to be construction workers, landscapers, plumbers, real estate agents, etc. Remember, the only reason they are on these apps is for their hook-up on the road, although I have seen these guys be extremely stupid and actually find hook-ups on their home turf.
Some incredibly stupid women have also posted Tiktoks where they show themselves at the guy’s game and then realize that they were set up with a player and had no idea. Other Tiktoks show girls exposing the players cheating on their girlfriends and wives. We’ll get into it on the podcast this week!

As for dating and relationship observations, here are a couple of mine.

1- The first three dates ( which could be seen as a barometer) should just be friendly dates because then you’re really know if you want to pursue anything else and believe me I have had physical attraction right from the get go with some people and it didn’t end up the way that I wanted it to but I don’t regret having that relationship with those people because it taught me a lot about myself and it taught me how relationships last and how relationships don’t last. – Now, when sexual shenanigans take place, that can cloud your judgement on a person. But I don’t think there are any rules to dating expect the 1st date should not include shenanigans.
Also a “date” consists of either coffee, drinks, dinner, a fun nonsexual activity.

2- Sometimes one person in the relationship grows faster and grows completely away from what brought them together in the first place while the other person is still stagnant in the same spot. This is why some relationships fail.

3- I don’t understand why people want to be in relationships just for the sake of being in a relationship if it’s not something that you really really want. Why waste all that time and energy to just date for the sake of dating you know?

4- There’s so much double standards STILL with women in relationships. We can’t ask guys out because that seems too aggressive or seems as the masculine thing to do when we have to only show our feminine side… blah blah blah.

5- Then of course the stigma about women being single… Women Like the character Samantha Jones from Sex and The City had sex “Like a man” you know, had her way with him, and then was done with him, she is seen as hoe or a whore. Meanwhile guys can do whatever the hell they want and there’s no stigma to that.

6- If I decide to date a guy that that’s younger than me I’m gonna be seen as a cougar but when a guy my age, date’s a girl younger than him it’s OK. But I am more attracted to young guys 24-30.

7- Of course there is still the stigma that there’s something wrong with a woman who stays single too. I’m not gonna waste my time to going out with someone because all my friends are with someone or all the pressures on women . I don’t really go with the trendy stuff if you haven’t noticed, I do what is best for me whether other people like it or not.

8- Athletes fall into 1 of 2 categories- A) The one where they have to date arm candy because that is all they have to offer and it makes them look “good, powerful and important. ” B) The one where they actually date someone not because of who they are, what they look like, or the attention they would get because they dated that person, but because simply they love who they are, they are supportive, loyal, and they bring out the best in them when they are performing in their sport. I guess that is why this former cheerleader and current cheer coach loves being around athletes, because I LEAD.
That’s why we’re called cheerleaders because we’re supposed to LEAD not sit on the sidelines and watch things happen. I am loyal, supportive, and I understand things from an athlete’s point of view. They aren’t robots, they are people. They have emotions, they hurt, have pain, and experience life just like any of us. Most fans forget that part, sadly.
I root hard for those I care about. I want them to succeed. I want them to have their dreams come true.
If you read this blog, religiously, then you read me talk about my previous relationships, and what I took from them to become the best version of myself in order to be able to give that to a guy who deserves it in the future. Yes, I know I am a rare breed, I am the prize. I know what I bring to the table. And one day, a guy is going to see that… If we’re dating, I want to be your second priority. I want your first priority to be you, your ambitions, your life and your future, because seeing you happy makes me happy. Seeing you succeed pushes me to succeed. Finding happiness and security alone, are crucial to finding it together.

You Can Learn A lot From People Not Your Age ( Hello, Adam Fox)

For all those non-hockey fans, yesterday the NY Rangers named Jacob Trouba their team captain ( the team hasn’t had one in 4+ years) and one of the players on the team, Adam Fox, had an interesting quote:

So that got me thinking: Why are so many people afraid to associate themselves with people OUTSIDE their age bracket? Being that I was a Pre-K teacher since I was 20 and taught for 15 years, my job was simple: to get kids excited about learning. Not only was it to help them grow, but it was to make them understand that everyday they are are going to learn something new about the world, about themselves and about each other. It was the most fun I had, other than coaching cheerleading which I still do.

One thing is certain and it is the thing in the quote by Adam Fox that he misses the boat on: One can learn from anyone, age is only a number of how long you have been on Earth. People should have is an open mind.

I learn from people who are the most open minded and most knowledgeable. I’ve seen older people who act immature and claim they know everything and I’ve seen young people who are calm and willing to give their two cents. I have been around teenagers, college students, guys/girls in their 20s and 30s. I also associate with folks in their 40s and 50s as well. I am full-rounded.

One of my favorite memories is listening to stories from my grandma who lived 99 years and my great-aunt who is still alive at 106 ( she will be 107 in a month) The stories taught me life lessons that I was able to put to use in my life. An example was when my grandma told me to always be the bigger person, arguing with fools make you look like a fool. It’s never worth standing around and arguing if you aren’t going to find a solution to the problem.

If you read my previous blogs, you know that I am a big supporter of younger guys dating older women and older men dating younger women. The reasons were simply:

Older people have a lot of life experience. They can teach you a lot about the reality of life. On the flip side, young folks can teach you what you forget growing up. They are so full of life and ideas. They can’t wait to go out in the world and leave their mark. Its sometimes necessary to not be worried about a single thing and go do what you want to do. Older folks and younger folks can mingle, have adventures together and not have to deal with so much drama as you do when you only are interested in your age category.

I believe that someone has something that I can learn. I never let age, gender or sexuality, be a factor as to whether I should learn from them or not. To do so would be idiocy. Too bad Adam Fox only thinks he can learn from people close to his age or his age. I mean, I understand that sometimes we get comfortable, but you never grow in your comfort zone. It’s only when you embrace the unknown and take a risk that you learn a lot about life and the world you live in. Some risks are always worth taking like love, doing what you are passionate about and standing up for yourself.

Wisdom should always be shared. Every day I learn something in the industry I am in: social media. Some of those in this industry are younger than me, and they learn from me as well. Also, I have coached cheer for a very, very long time, and have learned things from those older than me and younger than me in this industry.

Imagine being a hockey player and only thinking that you are going to learn from those closest to your age? That is ridiculous! You learn from those who played the game before you as well as you learn from those young kids who are just starting out. You learn from coaches who are probably old enough to be the players dads or uncles.

The point is, you learn from people, not from their age. Age does not guarantee knowledge and knowledge can be compounded and complex at any age.

Here are a few other things that people have taught me in life to date:

1- If you worry about how people will judge you, you’ll never achieve anything.

2-There won’t be “plenty of time later” to enjoy life. Life is short and you have NO IDEA how long you have here. Why wait to do what it is that you want to do? Don’t put off your career change, relationship, or any other life desire until you reach some mythical point of readiness; it doesn’t exist.

3- It’s vital to cultivate friendships with people older and younger than you. Younger friends steep you in optimism and possibility, while older friends will ground you in wisdom. You need the perspectives of both.

4- There’s no quicker path to misery than conditional happiness.

If I get that promotion, I will feel happy.
If I buy that luxury car, I will feel content.
If I find a girlfriend/boyfriend, I will feel joy.

If you can’t find happiness during the pursuit, it won’t last long when you reach the finish line. Find joy in the journey- that is what life is- a journey and so far I am having fun on mine.

Why This Chick Loves Hockey

Whenever I tell someone that my favorite sport to watch and breathe is hockey, the looks I get could make for a great meme. But when I tell everyone that mine dream job back when I graduated high school was to be a hockey writer, that look, could make for an awesome GIF. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. The stereotype that women are only interested in sports for the hot dudes, is old. I could tell you that I love the action and adrenaline of the greatest sport on earth. I could tell you that I love the fact that hockey players are the most genuine athletes and are hard core, bad asses. I could tell you that I love all that and more, but still most would still think that all I am is a “puck bunny.”

When you love a sport that is dominated by males, sometimes it’s hard to get your point across. So for the guy hockey fan who keeps calling women “puck bunnies” let me point out with all-over protective shields/padding, helmets and face guards, your average female fan isn’t coming to games to drool over the players as their reason for the love of the game. The only thing clearly on display during a game is the player’s skills, abilities and their character. Yes, as a female I will admit that some dudes that play this game are indeed something to look at, especially in their suits they wear entering the arenas, but to say that is what is drawing females to the game is in plain English; sexist.

The skill and my pure jealousy of just how well the players can ice skate, forwards, backwards, sideways all while holding a hockey stick which they need to have hand/eye coordination with, is what drew me to the game in the first place. Then of course there are the fights and the hits. Um, hello, it’s the don’t mess with me attitude that I love. Hockey is the ONLY sport where an athlete will put his team before himself; especially in the playoffs, and play while he is injured. ( Hello, Ryan Lindgren- the warrior himself) Tell me that an NFL, NBA or MLB player ever really has done that? Seriously, they hurt their finger and they are out 2-4 weeks.

Also with hockey no two games are ever the same, even if the score winds up that way. I like how I can sit through sixty minutes of play, an hour worth of intermission reports, an OT and a shootout and somehow find myself more engaged the longer I spend sitting in front of the T.V! And with playoff hockey my heart in beating in my throat with sudden death OT ( Game seven of the Rangers vs Pens series, holy Moses!)
Watching a hockey game in person is just the best experience ever on this planet. Especially if it is at Madison Square Garden watching my favorite team, The New York Rangers. And if some think the regular season is fun, the playoffs at MSG; cannot be topped at any other arena. If you ever want that Oh. My. God feeling…. you come to a playoff game at MSG.

No other sport can match up to hockey. Football takes a 40 second break after every play. The last 20 seconds of a basketball game could take 15 minutes with all the timeouts, and baseball, we all know that baseball is slow. ( Especially watching it on TV) All people need to do is watch one game of hockey or hangout with some true hockey fans, and I believe that they will understand why hockey is the most exciting sport to watch. Oh, and if I forgot to mention, hockey players engage with the fans of the game. You see players talking to fans, giving them pucks, sticks, and even encouraging kids who are sick to keep fighting. These guys will give the shirt off their back to the fans, you don’t see that in any other sport!

So to those who think women only love the sport of hockey for the men who play it; yeah we do.( insert my sarcasm here) The men who play hockey are the toughest guys on the planet and they don’t need to post pictures on their social media of them being buff or working out for us to know that they are tough. We know that they are tough simply by watching the game we love and be amazed at their talent, skill and mental/physical toughness.

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