Get Ready: A sneak peek of “Meet Me in the Penalty Box”

As you well know by following this blog and if you follow me on social, you know that I am writing a book called, “Meet Me In The Penalty Box,” which exposes the NHL culture to a tee. Here’s a excerpt of the book: the first two sections: All About The Victims and Exploring the Topic Of Culture

Did you know, in 2022, there were 1.37 million domestic violence crimes committed in the US. According to the CDC, in 2022, women reported intimate partner violence around 41%

These are topics that women try and avoid talking about because they are embarrassed to admit that they have been in an abusive relationship or they feel ashamed that they succumbed to a man who tricked them into believing that he loved her by abusing her.

What does all this have to do with the NHL? (National Hockey League) 


The NHL is the ONLY major pro-sports league without a league specific policy outlining what happens to players who are accused of sexual crimes and domestic abuse. 

There have been incidents within the league that the league have stayed quiet about and have swept it under the rug, so to speak. (I then get into many different cases)

The question that everyone seems to have in regards to violence against women is where does this start to form in a man’s life?

Why does he intentionally want to hurt someone who is seen as loving and caring towards him?

And how do women play a role in being manipulated into falling into a pattern of trusting violent men with their lives? 



Dating Violence

Violence in teen relationships predicts violence in adulthood. In the United States, up to 19% of teens experience sexual or physical dating violence, about half face stalking or harassment, and as many as 65% report being psychologically abused ( Stats are from Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention)

In many cases, violence can happen when young people don’t yet have the skills to manage conflict, cope with feelings of jealousy, and navigate rejection. Many teens perceive this type of behavior as “normal” and a way to express love in intimate relationships.

The truth of the matter is this: Teen dating violence seems to be overlooked, not only in the scientific community but in society at large. It’s developmentally appropriate for young people to explore their sexuality.

But as a society we haven’t figured out how to support that while protecting them from a risk of violence. Added pressures today include social media and how sexuality is perceived.

According to 2019 data from the CDC’s Youth Risk Behavior Survey, about 1 in 12 teens experience physical dating violence and about the same number face sexual dating violence. Other studies suggest rates may be higher, especially when accounting for psychological forms of abuse.

In one nationally representative study of young people ages 14 to 21, 51% of females and 43% of males reported being victims of at least one type of dating violence, while 50% of females and 35% of males reported perpetrating at least one type.

Girls as young as age 6 have been taught for generations to accept the fact that when a boy pulls your hair, trips you, pokes you, laughs at you, or does anything else to you, this is a clue that he “likes you.”

Little girls have been conformed and trained to accept this behavior from boys as an expression of interest, which means we have been training girls that it is normal for guys to physically, mentally, and emotionally abuse us as an expression of love.

Teen boys who abuse dating partners are more than likely to have experienced child abuse or neglect. Teen boys who are abusers, are more likely to use alcohol or drugs than their nonviolent counterparts.



Teen boys who abuse their partners then to have sexist attitudes that support male domination over females.



In some cases, dating violence may be part of a pattern of antisocial or aggressive behavior.

But much of the time, teens may simply not know how to manage the emotions and conflicts that arise as they enter their first relationships.

Patterns in teen relationships are similar to adult battering relationships – they involve the same elements of control and jealousy. Teen girls and women describe the same range of violent experiences from slaps and shoves, to beatings and attacks with weapons. 

There are several youth-specific aspects to their relationships- 
Pressure to conform to peer-group norms which contributes to an emphasis on having a specific dating partner. 
Peer pressure can be so intense and the fear of being different, or of violating peer-group norms, can create rigid conformity.

Teenage boys will begin to establish such patterns when their violent dating behaviors are reinforced by members of their peer group and by society as a whole.

Their expectations of a girlfriend may include that she gives up certain activities and other relationships in order to give priority to her boyfriend. 

This is why basic chicks fit the mold/pattern for hockey players.

They find women who will conform to what the boyfriend wants and accepts their dominance in the relationship. This includes that he be sexually aggressive, make all the decisions, and he will control her activities and behavior…..

(Section 2: Exploring the Topic of Culture)

The United States also has an individualistic culture, meaning people place a high value on individuality and independence. In contrast, many other cultures are collectivist, meaning the welfare of the group and group relationships is a primary value.
Living up to a culture’s values can be difficult. It’s easy to value good health, but it’s hard to quit smoking. Marital monogamy is valued, but many spouses engage in infidelity. Cultural diversity and equal opportunities for all people are valued in the United States, yet the country’s highest political offices have been dominated by white men.
In many cultures, women are expected to be responsible for things that men are not. And, there are more pressures put on girls and women to look young and youthful no matter how old she is. Women’s full and equal participation in all facets of society is a fundamental human right. Yet, around the world, from politics to sports to the workplace, women and girls are largely underrepresented.

While the specific expectations have varied across cultures and time periods, core assumptions about women’s roles have persisted for millennia. Let’s take a brief look at how the values and beliefs women “should” follow enfolded…..

Today, this is how women see themselves:

  • Independence focused
  • Sexually liberated
  • Work focused

Today this is how men still want to see women:

  • Homemaker
  • Mother
  • Primary caregiver
  • Submits to her man
  • Adopts her man’s moral foundations

A traditional woman is a woman who follows older established principles of femininity. But today, women are pushing away from being a “traditional woman” because men today are pushing away from being, “a traditional man.”

What is a traditional man?

He is someone who adheres to conventional, often historical, gender roles and expectations. This may include traits like being a provider, protector, and head of the household, with a focus on strength, and dominance. Basically he follows established principles of masculinity.

Men before the social media era had more strength, courage, and discipline than today’s men. Men used to be better men, and more men wanted to be more like that. Today though, men rather complain about women being masculine and not feminine.

Maybe this is news to a lot of men but women take self-defense courses because we’re told we need to protect ourselves from men. Instead of men learning to be better men. The value of women is not limited to their sex appeal. Treat women the way you would treat any normal person. How you speak, walk, move your body or go about everyday life has nothing to do with masculinity, aside from other people’s preconceived ideas.

When most men think of “manliness”, they think of the fantastical archetypes we’ve been inundated with since childhood:

James Bond, Ernest Hemmingway, Captain America, and the list goes on.

They think that manliness is about hunting big game, or knowing how to fight, or sleeping with dozens of women, or driving a fast car. But these activities do not make one manly. Manliness, or as I prefer to call it “masculinity”, is about the principles by which you operate and the way that you commit yourself to various pursuits in life.
I would argue that developing your masculinity just as women develop their femininity, is based on a handful of simple principles…..

When women are assaulted, their past gets investigated.
When men assault, their future gets protected.
When women get assaulted, it’s like society treats them like a criminal first, not a victim. But men? Oh no, their futures need to be protected at all costs. The only thing that matters is making sure they get a “second chance” while she’s left fighting for her dignity. This victim-blaming crap isn’t just sick, it’s a systematic pile-on designed to keep her in the dirt while they get to walk away unscathed.

What does all this have to do with the NHL and their culture?

Well, let me start off by saying this: Culture isn’t an excuse for abuse. And abuse is silent no matter what type of abuse it is emotionally mental, physical or sexual.

And the fact that people know that it’s happening and they close the blind eye to it or they sweep it under the rug or they try to hide it as fast as they can, shows you the nature of this problem isn’t small. The NHL is very good at covering this up and that shows you that they know right from wrong but they don’t care.

And to all those guys that I see commenting on this type of thing on Instagram, Facebook and Threads is disturbing.
The main comment is that, we as women will never get rid of sexual assault. That’s that is correct statement because we’re never going to get rid of hate, we’re never going to get rid of violence 100%, but the fact that you don’t even want to think about how you can make things better for not just yourself but those around you, show that you are part of the problem, not the solution.

It’s always amazing to me. How guys are more worried about the accusations of their favorite athletes than the violence itself .
Defending them with the my favorite sayings, “she was a whore,” “She wanted it now she’s regretting it.” And my ultimate favorite, “Innocent until proven guilty.”
There’s also another one, “She consented so this didn’t happen.”

They just don’t understand what consent and not consent is and even if she consented in the beginning, a woman has a right to change her consent at any point given in time.
When a woman says no or stop or I don’t want to do this and you don’t listen to her, you are raping her. It doesn’t matter if she’s your wife, it doesn’t matter if she’s your girlfriend, it doesn’t matter if she’s your partner, it doesn’t matter if she’s a hooker from the street, it does not matter.

And that is where the problem then grows.

The hockey culture is four things, alcohol, drugs, sex and gambling.

(To Be Continued)







Should I say, I told you so?

If you follow this blog or my podcast, you know that for over the past year I have been preaching and talking about how the NHL’s culture is very sexist and has a misogyny tone.
I have pointed out cases when this happened, not to mention my own experience. Well, today we found out that the New York Rangers and the NHL have been covering up ( Surprise… but not really) Artemi Panarin’s alleged sexual assault of a former MSG staffer.
The story which broke from Katie Strang, of the Athletic, which is the following: The Rangers and Artemi Panarin reached settlements in August 2024 with a former female employee regarding a sexual assault claim, stemming from a December 2023 incident where Panarin took the employee’s phone, and would not give it back to her until she came to his hotel room, where he allegedly pinned her down on a bed, she pushed him off, and left.

As also told by beat writer, Vince Mercogliano, The woman, who was not identified in the report, reached agreements with Panarin and MSG Sports, which included non-disclosure and no admission of wrongdoing clauses, and then left the company.

The Club retained an outside law firm to conduct an independent investigation, which the League was fully apprised of. We consider the matter closed,” the NHL said in a statement. The league and Rangers declined to say whether Panarin was disciplined regarding the situation. 

The female employee felt she was treated unfairly, according to team sources, and she then informed the team about the alleged assault. In February 2021, Panarin stepped away from the team for personal reasons after a Russian newspaper reported claims he was involved in a physical altercation with a woman in Latvia that year.

It’s important to note that when the Rangers were investigating a separate matter involving the same employee giving “anti-anxiety medicine” to a player on a team flight. The Rangers’ social media employees were no longer permitted to travel with the team as a result.

It’s also important to note that Jess Isner, who was the social media admin for the Boston Bruins and the Phoenix Coyotes prior to being the social media admin of the New York Rangers from 2019-2023  is no longer the admin and all her social media has been deleted.
The public may not realize just how many victims of any crime blame themselves for their own victimization. Self blame is one of the most toxic forms of emotional abuse. It amplifies our perceived inadequacies, whether real or imagined, and paralyzes us before we can even begin to move forward. Seemingly innocent questions from family and friends can trigger self-doubt and prevent victims from reporting to police.

They may also question what they did wrong and believe it was their fault. Sexual harassment and assault can be a humiliating experience to recount privately, let alone publicly. Victims of sexual harassment and sexual assault in adulthood or sexual abuse in childhood tend to feel shame, because as human beings, we want to believe hat we have control over what happens to us. When that personal power is challenged by a victimization of any kind, we feel humiliated.

Another reason women don’t go to the police is that they fear of the repercussions when it comes to reporting sexual harassment or assault — fear of losing their job, fear they won’t find another job, fear they will be passed over for a promotion, fear of losing their credibility, fear of being branded a troublemaker, fear of being blackballed in their industry, fear of their physical safety, etc. The fact that sexual misconduct is the most under-reported crime is due to a common belief that women make up these stories for attention or to get back at a man who rejected them. Victims’ accounts are often scrutinized to the point of exhaustion.

Also women feel it is useless to come forward, because they have seen the way others have been treated. They feel it is hopeless, because they won’t be believed, and their reputations will be tainted, if not ruined. Women who have already been sexually assaulted or harassed feel especially helpless, since the chances are extremely high that they did not receive the justice they so desperately needed.

To all the men out there focusing so much energy on trying to figure out why victims don’t report, it would be far more productive to ask, “Why do we allow men to continue to sexually harass and assault women?”

FYI: Next Tuesday in a courtroom in London, Ont., five former members of Canada’s 2018 World Juniors team go on trial, 15 months after they were charged with sexual assault.

Michael McLeod, Carter Hart, Alex Formenton, Cal Foote, and Dillon Dube have all pleaded not guilty. McLeod faces a second sexual assault charge as a party to the offense.

And to those men who think what happened with Panarin wasn’t “sexual assault” there are 3 levels of sexual assault and it doesn’t always include sexual intercourse. Level 1 involves minor physical injuries or no injuries to the victim. Sexual assault Level 2: Sexual assault with a weapon, threats, or causing bodily harm. Aggravated sexual assault. Level 3: Sexual assault that results in wounding, maiming, disfiguring or endangering the life of the victim.

Follow me on X or IG for more updates and important information.

The Silent Women Part 2

Jacob Trouba ( a fake account set up on this platform)

4d ago

“LOL which player rejected you?? There is no problem with women who are in relationships with NHL players; dating, married, or otherwise. The NHL is definitely NOT against women. The problem is you and your unhinged and attitude. If you feel that the NHL is against women like you, then rightfully so!!!”

Oh look I triggered you – Oh snap ( insert eye roll here and smirk)

See, the problem is NOT my unhinged attitude its the fact that these men can’t DEAL WITH IT because it is THE TRUTH. And this is a CLASSIC narcissist gaslighting response. Also, it seems as though this male is unhinged because he wants women to accept the status quo and not be better and do better. He probably also thinks it is a flex to sleep with multiple women too.
Obviously this dude also doesn’t know HOW to read. I never said there was a problem WITH women… I said clearly that the CULTURE and The TYPE of woman they are groomed to be with is the problem. DUH!

Guys do not want to become better men, so that’s why they settle for the basic chick because they’re not going to force them to be better.

And it’s not just the men who play in the NHL it’s men who are fans of the NHL.

That whole entire topic of would women choose the bear over a man in the woods, triggered so many men, but it just didn’t trigger men. It triggered the boys who are insecure and immature, and probably will never be men. 

But back to the NHL for a second …

You can listen to the podcast. I just did on this topic here.  * click to listen * 

And if you would like to read the books that are written on men in relationships…

You can click here … I’m sure you’ll find what you need to find in the books.

But just to continue for a second ..

I mentioned in the last post about Instagram and the stories and how all these NHL players use them. . I did not mention why it’s terrible and what exactly it means when a man does that shit. But I will start with this if you’re a woman and you are dating an NHL player do not be the first to post him up. Let him be the first to post you up. Because then you’ll know that you’re dealing with the athlete that is proud to have you as his woman and he would like to show you off to everyone else if he only puts you up in his story he’s still trying to look single. 

If you go look at Cale Maker, Andrew Copp, Connor McDavid, Matthew Tkachuk, Ryan Lindgren, Jacob Trouba , etc… you will find on their actual pages, there is no such thing as they are/were actually dating a woman let alone being married to them.  And then they’ll just say well my life is private, blah blah blah…. It’s not that their life is private. It’s that they’re 1) not proud of the woman they’re with because 2)  she’s a basic chick and 3) it’s a secret so they can hook up using Tinder and other means especially when they’re on the road.

I mean, let’s look carefully at Connor McDavid, who was filmed on video in 2022 coming out of a bar with another woman not Laura who we ended up marrying . BTW…. If you look at their wedding photo there, there’s a specific one where they look like they’re unhappy. She knew that he’s a cheater and a liar and yet she still married him.

There’s a saying, a person who settles for crumbs, never understood the mentality of someone who wants the whole cake. Men want their cake and eat it too, but the women are not allowed to have that today. The women shouldn’t want the whole cake. They should just settle for crumbs and be happy.

Here’s something that I spoke about on the podcast if you are a woman and you give up your financial freedom to a man you’re pretty much done. If all women wanna do is just live off, their husband’s means and have nothing to fall back on, that’s the reason why most these women stay in abusive relationships. Well that and the fact that only 10% of those women that leave survive. 

A smart man realizes it’s better to grow with a smart woman because he’s never satisfied with his basic chick and that’s why you don’t see more of those smart men who play in the national hockey league with intelligent women. They don’t accept bare minimum simple because they can provide bare minimum for themselves . We don’t need men men need us. If a man can manipulate you into making you believe he loves you you’re done hence that’s why they choose basic chicks, most likely under the age of 26. 

And BTW… there are a lot of married single moms in the NHL. Those who do EVERYTHING on their own and the men don’t do shit. I talk more on the podcast about this.

Men are intimidated by intelligent women. They are inferior to them, but women who gave blow jobs just to get ahead are the women men can control and that’s why hockey players choose basic chicks because they will accept the bare minimum and are easily controlled. 

If you look back through the history of the NHL and I mean way back, coaches used to sleep with other coaches wives players used to sleep with other players wives …. This type of culture starts in junior hockey.

Also, last year there was a scenario on TikTok with the NHL player Alex Wennberg . A lot of fantasy writers use the NHL players and sexualize the players themselves. Hence we had something called booktok. And the funny thing about it is the fact that the admin for the Seattle Kraken bought into it and used it in their social media.

If you look on TikTok, a lot of women sexualize the warm-up routine that a lot of NHL players do. (Its mostly certain type of stretching) But those women to me are not true hockey fans those women are the thirsty hoes. Yes I said what I said. You are a thirsty hoe, if you are sexualizing what hockey players are doing in warm up. It’s perfectly fine to say a guy a hot, good looking, dresses sharp, etc. BUT when you sexualize them, then you are saying the way that THEY treat women is acceptable.

I want women to want to better themselves and I want that for their daughters too.

Like I’ve seen before I have no problem if you wanna be a stay at home mom and live off your husband‘s means, but that means you’re giving up your financial freedom to your man. That means that no matter if he physically abuses you, emotionally abuses, you, or mentally abuses you You will end up staying in that relationship and teaching your daughter that there are no ways out and that you’re not worth it.

Women need to realize that they’re worth it!

Calling me unhinged just means I’m doing something right because it’s an unhinged attitude that men don’t appreciate and don’t like because I’ve said it before I’ll say it again they don’t want to better themselves. They want to be IN control of everything, especially a woman. They want women to be submissive to them and their needs and their wants . And the only way they can do that is if they pick a basic chick who accepts bare minimum.

By the way, on the podcast, I pick apart some of the New York Rangers wives and girlfriends and tell you some of the things that I see on their social compared to the things that their husbands and boyfriends post. I also get into this a little bit deeper on the podcast. It’s a great listen. I suggest you listen to it. Tell you, it’s a lot easier talking about it than it is writing it. So you’ll get some really good stuff on that podcast. 

Again, here’s the podcast link : click here 

The Silent Women Of The NHL

All last month I saw the NHL Public Relations Dept tweet out, “The NHL continues to celebrate Women in hockey…” and all I could think was, “What a load of crap!”

Why you ask?

Because it is a ploy to make you think that they 1) care about women at all and 2) a distraction from knowing or even thinking that the NHL is the ONLY professional league that does not have written policy to protect women in regard to sexual assault / domestic violence / sexual harassment – but no, let’s get the confetti and celebrate them! (Insert eye roll here) Not only that, but the women also that are in the NHL now, as wives and girlfriends are silent. Do you notice that? Do you notice that when you do have a woman who is married (or used to be married) speak up that woman is forced to stay silent and if they shall open their mouths, they are given, “The Scarlet Letter?”


As you will notice from some of these photos of the some of the women, they look literally identical. I sent a few people a photo of these two women, one is a GF and the other is about to marry a player on the SAME team. And the response I received were al the same, “They are sisters, right?” Ha! Nope. They are NOT related.


Here’s something interesting and I know it is going to rub some folks the wrong way but when the hell did that stop me? If you notice that almost all the women who are either dating or married to NHL players look alike. Now, the ones who are not the same “type” are the ones that knew their athlete when they were young and probably met in school or while they were in the AHL or even possibly out in the wide world. Those women are the women who aren’t in the mold they are “supposed to be” while the women who all look alike, are that for a simple reason or two: Its to keep the hockey culture alive and well and it is also easier to control a chick who is basic and practically the same than it is to control a woman who is different and extra. Some of the basic chicks don’t even realize this, but that NHL player ain’t with you because he “loves you and wants to build with you,” but because you are basic and easy to control. You will put up with his bullshit and NEVER say anything that goes against the grain.
Sorry but not sorry, that is the culture in a heartbeat.


Let’s talk about that for a second.

Think about how uniformed the military is for a minute. Everyone looks alike, everyone sounds alike, and everyone stays in line. What happens when you get out of line? If you break violations, there are consequences.

Think about Boston Bruins Wags for a minute ( Wags stands for Wives and girlfriends) The wife of Lucic suffered domestic violence and filed an assault charge but “miraculously” it was dropped back in February of this year because his agent and the team made it difficult for her to testify and the charges were dropped. But think about the WAGS whose job it is to ONLY smile, look pretty and be happy all the time.

NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN FROM THAT WAG GROUP SAID A DAMN THING ABOUT THIS.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN THAT WORKS WITHIN THE BRUINS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.

GARY BETMANN THE COMMISSONER DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP AND SAY THAT ASSAULT OF ANY KIND IS NOT TOLERATED IN THE NHL.

Why? Simple. It’s part of the NHL culture and it’s acceptable. So that is why the players go for basic chicks. A basic chick is EASY to control. A basic chick will not shake things up or cause a stir. A basic chick will not stand up for the other women in fear that they too can be assaulted or abused in any way. And of course, the guys will tell them to keep quiet because THEY DON’T WANT TO BE OSTRACIZED BY THE REST OF THE GUYS because “his woman” opened her mouth.

Think about Anna Kane for a minute. Everyone calls her “crazy” simply because she opened her mouth about domestic violence and how her daughter was taken away from her. The fact is, she is not crazy, what is crazy is that the truth she speaks triggers all those who want to live in this fake sexist world that is the NHL.
She needs to keep speaking her truth!

Something that I noticed from a NY Rangers wife on IG is the fact that she is AMAZING and she tries to have businesses and do things that make her happy outside of her husband’s hockey world. Every time she posts something where she goes off and does something amazing that she wanted to do she thanks her husband for, “Allowing me to be able to do it.” Um, excuse me? He “allowed” you do it? What are you, his slave? She should be allowed to do WHATEVER the fuck she wants to do. She is smart, beautiful and talented. She should not feel the need to thank him at all unless she is thanking him for support.

Another thing I noticed this past February. Jacob Trouba donated or painted some shit for Epilepsy NYC – His wife is a fucking doctor, and she is the photo you see below. The NHL public relations did NOT only MENTION her in the post, but didn’t even TAG HER! She knows MORE about Epilepsy than does the NHL and her husband Jacob! The reason is CLEAR why they didn’t mention her, it GOES AGAINST what the CULTURE is… and the sexism and misogyny at an ALL TIME HIGH!



And I won’t stop there. Sometimes these players pass around the SAME girl as they are appetizers. There is a guy on the Sharks that is married to a basic chick who dated another dude from a another team.

So before I continue let me qualify what a basic chick is or accepts for that matter. A basic chick accepts bare minimum at most. That’s it. Like I have said, they put up with the dudes bullshit. They never correct him, they are never supported publicly on social media or posted up, they never do anything else or demand to be treated better. They just accept basic treatment. The ones who are posted up are in a real relationship for the right reasons, the ones who aren’t, well, like I said, are only with him for the reasons that she is easy and breezy like I say below.

Why do you think I never “made it” dating an NHL player? Because I am extra and I am not going to sit there and let shit happen to the sisterhood that would be the WAGS. No way. I on the other hand, refuse to be tamed or groomed a certain way to “fit into the hockey culture”.
If you know me, you know that I protect all the people who are close to me. (Which isn’t that many but if you are in my circle, you are important to me.) I would though, as I have been told, would make an awesome hockey girlfriend, since I know the game inside out. I am a former cheerleader/ coach and I still work in the cheer industry so I know a thing or two about support and spreading positivity.

Now, I have NOTHING against a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom and just live off her husband’s means, if that is what she chooses to do. If a woman doesn’t want to better herself, that’s her prerogative. But I am saying here is the NHL doesn’t give women that option. You don’t see any woman who is married to a hockey player, who is a legend in her own right. For that matter you don’t even see hockey players on social media showing off their women like they’re proud of them, instead they hide them.
Did you know that 2 stars got married this year? Maker and Copp. But if you looked at their social media you wouldn’t even know that they were dating someone and the answer you get from guys as to why they hide their women from their social is a copout: “My life is private.” Yo, dude, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between people KNOWING you are with someone and KEEPING that person a SECRET. And oh, By the way, A NY Rangers player or two does the SAME SHIT! These women are posting up them in their stories (which is literally a story for another day) and not posting on their feed about the “love of their lives”


And then there is this: These women are afraid to speak up about ANYTHING.

Last year, a NY Rangers had a player whose wife needed In vitro fertilization. That must not have been an easy road, but she did it and had a precious son. She could have been a spokesperson, a representative for all women who struggle. She had the platform to do that. But all she did was an IG story, and that was it. Was she afraid to speak up? Was she told to keep that on the down low?

Women or the WAGS don’t speak up about ANYTHING! They are the silent women of the NHL. They are JUST there to LOOK pretty when they can bring SO much more to the table.

The rest of the women who work in the league also work in silence. Imagine working for Gary Betmann who has two daughters and needs to “stay in line” so she can keep her job, which by the way, is rare for a woman to be working in this league in the first place since 36% of women work in the male dominant sport.

If you are a guy and you are the one saying, “Well, why don’t these women just come forward?” Here’s my answer for you to digest. When women come forward you men, DON’T support them instead you QUESTION and ACCUSE the VICTIM of what she is saying because OH My God, he’s your “favorite’ athlete. If women told you they were attacked by a wild animal you would believe them, no strings attached, but when a women tells you that they are attacked by a man, you question it. The worst is when you say they are “just thirsty, or they wanted that,” Um, not every woman is after a man for his money and I don’t give a flying fuck what the girl is wearing, no girl is asking for it. Also, you guys think it’s a flex to hook up with many chicks and be with “really pretty girls” that is not a flex, that just shows how immature and unstable you guys really are.

Also, I will not validate my feelings on social. I am sorry if this triggers you but if it does, oh well.
If you planned on commenting or a woman dating/married to an NHLer says “We aren’t forced to be silent we just don’t want to distract him or the team… blah blah blah…” I call BS. It’s not that you are forced NOT to open your mouth, it’s that you are scared as shit to open your mouth with fear. And that is wrong.

The NHL culture is AGAINST women. If it weren’t the commissioner would not be against creating a written policy to protect women and their partners.
Sexism is ingrained in the NHL culture as it is to socialize young males with masculine ideals. The process encourages young guys to embody certain traits such as sexism and misogyny and they are subjected to policing tactics that ensure that EVERY SINGLE NHL PLAYER adopts this way of life.

The best the NHL could do is come up with a dumbass slogan, “Hockey is for everyone” is a load of crap, whereas we are talking about sexuality, sexism, and bullying. By the way, Canada is so grossly engaged in the culture of hockey, that is drives that Country’s funding and sport policies.

If current player’s voices are needed and yet they will not recognize how they have objectification of girls and women, how can sexism and misogyny ever be challenged and changed?

Today, you see so many NHL players publicly revealing their struggles with addictions, is connected to this NHL culture that HAS TO CHANGE. Also, what is connected to this culture is the fact that the players are with hyper masculine ideals and that they are not manly if they don’t play through an injury. It bears to also note that the challenge within the hockey culture is that the culture is intentional. The guys struggle for what it means to recognize such behaviors. There is no room for a view of what it means to be otherwise; you are either part of the culture or you are shun from ever making it in the league. There can be NO player who is bigger than the league itself. And when there is, he is not treated well. If the NHL really wanted to celebrate women as women SHOULD BE celebrated, then this culture of having women be a carbon copy of another woman should not be a “thing” in 2024. EVERY woman is special in her own right. EVERY woman deserves respect, appreciation and love for what THEY bring to the table AND not TOLD what to bring to the table.

Why do men of the NHL want woman to bring the exact same thing to the table? What the hell are they so freaking afraid of?

And as I type this, I can guarantee you that behind closed doors some of the women of the NHL are abused and assaulted. If there is one thing, I have learned about watching hockey for as long as I have it’s this: I can pick up on vibes of the players who need anger management. So, if a player on the ice doesn’t get his way and get all heated, don’t you think he brings home that same type of vibe?

Note: there is data that backs this up. Don’t believe me, go on Google and find it.

To summarize, the problem stems from inside the league and blooms all the way around the league. The first step to create change is simple: The League needs a written policy and the players need to start being accountable for it.

So, will women finally speak up and have a voice or will they “stay in line” and “behave” like all NHL players want them too?

Time will tell, but in 2024, the TIME IS NOW.

Men, The Bear, Bumble And Harrison Butker

I wasn’t playing on writing a blog like this, but seeing how the landscape has been against women even more than it has been as of late, I had to put my thoughts into words.

For starters, if you are not on Tiktok then you missed a lot.

There was this dude who seriously looks like the guy who secretly films women getting dressed in the changing room at a department store, started us off, by telling us that men don’t have to accept women’s rejection : AKA he told men that is OKAY to RAPE them. I highly doubt that he is a “dating coach” which in itself is creepy. But what sane “coach” would tell men that women are forbidden to reject him? My thinking is that this guy never had a date back in high school and/or the head cheerleader rejected him and he is so scarred by that, he has hateful views now towards all women.

If that wasn’t bad enough, there was a guy who put out the question, if women were in a forest would they want to be in a forest alone with a MAN OR A BEAR? He was not asking which one women would choose, technically, but it took off on Tiktok and women every where were answering the bear. You can imagine how much this triggered guys EVERYWHERE!

The men, oh sorry, the boys that were triggered proved over and over WHY women preferred to be alone with a bear instead of a man. When asked to explain their decision, many women responded that they know a bear would either leave them alone or kill them, whereas they fear the details of exactly what a man could do to them. And if we look at the culture that is being thrown at women today, I think it is safe to say, this is why women would choose a bear.

Here are some reasons why women choose the bear in case men are still confused:
A- No one would question us about what I was wearing, why I was wearing what I was wearing, and If what I was wearing was to lead on any man to believe I wanted sex.
B- A Bear would not film it and send it to his friends and post it online.
C- No one will question if the bear attacked really happened. And to add, they won’t go on social media defending the man in question with the saying, “Innocent until proven guilty.”

By the way, there’s a reason women are warned not to hike or camp alone, and it’s not because of bears.

1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. RAINN ( Rape Abuse, Incest Network) says on average, there are nearly 450,000 victims of rape and sexual assault every year in the United States. According to North America Bear Center- black bears – the most common bear in the United States – kill less than one person per year. On average, 28 people in the United States die each year from lightning strikes, according to all U.S. lightning deaths reported from 2006 through 2021

So, when women are saying that they FEEL SAFER in the FOREST/WOODS alone with a bear than with a strange man, and men, instead of trying to make things BETTER for women, are triggered by it and instead of trying to say, “Men should not rape, men should not act like pigs when it comes to women,” They are trying to gaslight, manipulate and force women to feel crazy and stupid for saying a bear. Then you hear guys ask the question why women who are abused and assaulted never come forward or come forward years later:

As many as 90% of those survivors never report their abuse to law enforcement, and more than 30% will never report their abuse to anyone (National Association to Prevent Sexual Abuse of Children).

What Happens To Rapists When They Are Caught And Reported?

  • 60% of rapes/sexual assaults are not reported to police, according to a statistical average of the past 5 years.  Those rapists, of course, never spend a day in prison.  Factoring in unreported rapes, only about 6% of rapists ever serve a day in jail.
  • If a rape is reported, there is a 50.8% chance of an arrest.
  • If an arrest is made, there is an 80% chance of prosecution.
  • If there is a prosecution, there is a 58% chance of conviction.
  • If there is a felony conviction, there is a 69% chance the convict will spend time in jail.
  • So even in the 39% of attacks that are reported to police, there is only a 16.3% chance the rapist will end up in prison.

Not only are we talking about rape and sexual abuse, but let’s not forget about domestic violence. According to National Domestic Violence Hotline, Over 1 in 3 women (35.6%) in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.

This is another reason why I am fighting to have the National Hockey League ( NHL) to have a policy in place to protect all wives, girlfriends, and staff of NHL teams against these crimes that DO HAPPEN IN THEIR LEAGUE!
The hockey culture and how they treat women is disgusting! The social aspect of the sport supports issues related to misogyny, sexism, homophobia, and xenophobia.

An anonymous quote from a hockey player on how the culture continues because whatever is SAID in the locker room, stays there. ( Same concept as VEGAS)
“There’s stuff that happens in the dressing room, obviously, talking about girls, parties, whatever is the case, that happens in there, that sort of stays in there for the most part. Well, on good teams it stays in there. Whether it’s who you’re hooking up with, if you got sent pictures from some girl, everyone sees them. So it stays in the dressing room and it’s a team builder. It’s not to embarrass people in front of the outside world.”

THIS ONLY GETS WORSE:
This locker room culture in THE NHL encourages and rewards particular performances of masculinity. And players who don’t adhere to implicit and explicit organizational expectations risk being ostracized.

So, when a FEMALE, wants to have NHL PLAYERS on a podcast – you are rejected AUTOMATICALLY.
So, when a FEMALE, wants to develop friendships with hockey players, THEY NEED TO BE CERTAIN WOMEN –
Beyond sexist barriers within the sport, there are misogynist ideas engrained that position women as objects and conquests within hockey culture- That is why you ONLY SEE WOMEN WHO 1- ACCEPT BARE MINIMUM, 2- WILL NOT OPEN THEIR MOUTHS ON WHAT THEY KNOW ABOUT HOW OTHER WOMEN ARE TREATED, AND 3- WHO LOOK A CERTAIN WAY!
Misogyny was undeniably evidenced in the alleged gang-sexual assault committed by members of Canada’s 2018 World Junior team, in the subsequent cover-up, and in the revelation that Hockey Canada had a fund that was used consistently and covertly to protect players.
The deeply entrenched sexism and misogyny within hockey culture contribute to these brutal acts of dehumanization. Yet, these connections remain unrecognizable because people are unable to confront the culture that permeates their existence. In addition, as this does not directly impact players, such as the consequences of playing through pain, the calls to confront sexism/misogyny are largely not coming from male players. Unfortunately, there is more impact when people within hockey resist the harmful impacts of the culture as people are more inclined to listen to and empathize with the protagonists in our national narrative and because status is used to legitimize particular perspectives. If current player’s voices are needed, and yet they cannot recognize the objectification of girls and women, how will sexism and misogyny ever be recognized and meaningfully challenged if it remains unrecognizable to those within the culture? Yet, as recent current events have revealed, this resistance is the problem at hand!
AND JUST THIS WEEK, A Native American woman who worked for the Chicago Blackhawks is suing the organization and its charity, the Chicago Blackhawks Foundation, accusing them of breach of oral contract, fraud and sexual harassment.

Then of course we have the dating app Bumble who decided to tell women to KEEP HOOKING UP with guys on their app because they are losing money and that in turn is all they care about! Seriously, I keep telling you all how TERRIBLE dating apps are and they filled with men who ONLY want to hook up, rape women, cheat on partners.. . etc.
Bumble fumbled, are now working quickly fix the damage caused by an ad campaign that pokes fun at celibacy and abstinence. They changed HOW the app worked, which pissed off A TON of women, and then did this ad. They did apologize, but.. THIS IS WHY WOMEN CHOOSE THE BEAR!

Now here’s the KICKER, literally, the kicker in all of this …

The Kansas City Chiefs Kicker Harrison Butkler, said at very conservative Catholic College told women that they shouldn’t be out here, climbing up the corporate ladder that they should be home, taking care of their husband and children.
If women decide to do that, that’s their choice it’s not for a man to decide a woman’s fate.
Which is kind of funny since his mom, Elizabeth Keller Butker is an accomplished academic who holds a degree in Chemistry from Smith College as well as a Master’s degree in Medical Physics.

How did his mom somehow raised him to be a MISOGYNISTIC & SEXIST man?

BTW Harrison, if you are reading this: you’re a kicker you don’t do hard things and you STILL miss. 

I have NOTHING against women who CHOOSE to be a stay at home mom, if that’s what you want be and that’s what you desire then go for it but for a man who kicks balls for a living to tell other women that their dreams don’t matter and that they should just be in the kitchen is what’s wrong; it’s 2024 not 1964.

Women can do a lot of different things and wear different hats and that triggers some men who can’t do hard things.

Now, as a Catholic woman, I don’t agree AT ALL with what Harrison has said AND here are the Catholic teachings that I have been taught:

1- We all were created to serve God. We all have a special purpose, that purpose is not the same for everyone.
2- Each of us were shaped differently. We all were given different Spiritual gifts, Personalities, and Abilities. What you are ABLE to do, God wants you to do. No one else can play your role.
3- Love your neighbor as you love yourself. Your purpose is to show love to others.

God doesn’t want everyone to do the same work.
God doesn’t hate any of us based on race, sexuality, or weakness.
God made us and our life started at conception.

Those in the church that preach otherwise are preaching their own agenda. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. Maybe Harrison forgot this. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. I think as a society we have truly have forgotten about love and how to truly love each other.
Love only embraces, and never attacks. It is of the Spirit, and thus incapable of attack.
What a beautiful thought.

The NHL and it’s Misogynist Behavior

It’s no secret that A) I am a hockey fan and B) have had my share of controversy with my podcast – which I will mention later, but in its creepy, disgusting way, is all tied together. 
For those who aren’t hockey fans, there was a story that broke last week in regards to a sexual assault on a female back in 2018 at the World Junior Championship with Team Canada.

Here’s the background on this case:
In March of 2023, TSN’s Rick Westhead reported that The Heritage Committee had unanimously voted for a motion directing Hockey Canada to hand over law firm Henein Hutchison’s final report detailing its investigation into the alleged sexual assault. 

Police investigators in London, Ont., said in December of 2022 that they had “reasonable grounds” to believe that five members of the 2018 Canada World Juniors hockey team sexually assaulted a woman in a hotel room after a Hockey Canada fundraising gala, according to a court filing to the Ontario Court of Justice. 

The sexual assault allegations initially were investigated by London Police in 2018, however, the case was closed in February 2019 without any charges. The investigation was reopened in 2022.

In April of 2022, a woman filed a lawsuit against Hockey Canada, the Canadian Hockey League, and eight unnamed CHL players, stating she was sexually assaulted in a London, Ont. hotel room in June of 2018 following a Hockey Canada event.

The woman elected not to name any of the players involved, and stated in her original claim that it was eight “players for, and members of the CHL and Hockey Canada, including but not limited to members of the Canada U20 Men’s Junior Hockey Team.”

According to the lawsuit, the woman met the players at a bar, who were in London, Ont. for the Hockey Canada Foundation Gala & Golf event on June 18, 2018. She met one of the players, who is referred to as John Doe 1, who bought her alcoholic beverages. The woman said she was separated from her friend group as she became more intoxicated and eventually left the bar and went to a hotel with John Doe 1. 

At the hotel, the two ” engaged in sexual acts” in John Doe 1’s hotel room. The woman said that after this, “John Doe 1 invited the remainder of the John Doe defendants into the room without the knowledge or consent of the Plaintiff.”

The woman said in the claim that over the next several hours, John Does 1-8 engaged in several sexual acts “which collectively constituted sexual abuse and assault of the Plaintiff.” During these assaults, “the Plaintiff experienced an ongoing apprehension of imminent physical harm of a sexual nature. The actions of the John Doe Defendants caused terror and fear in the Plaintiff’s mind.” 

In the claim, the woman states that she could not give consent to any of the actions because of how intoxicated she was. In addition, the group of eight would not let her leave the room, despite multiple attempts by the victim.

The woman claimed that Hockey Canada knew about the allegations and did nothing about them.

Hockey Canada stated on Dec. 20 that their investigation had concluded and an adjunction panel would determine if any sanctions need to be imposed. They would keep the results confidential as the London Police continues with its investigation. 

In addition, Hockey Canada said last year that no player from the 2018 World Juniors team is eligible to play for Canada’s national team in any IIHF event for the foreseeable future.  ”Senior officials at Hockey Canada… claimed they didn’t know who was involved. It was a statement as ridiculous as it was disheartening and sickening.” 

After the initial closing of the investigation, Hockey Canada began to receive backlash from Canada’s political figures and sponsors, in addition to fans of the sport. Especially since they quietly paid off the woman involved.

The NHL said it would conduct its own independent investigation into what happened because some active players were on that team and attended the gala. Commissioner Gary Bettman pledged to release the findings once completed, but as we saw with the hush hush and lack of transparency with what went down with the Blackhawks, we know fully well that this too will be “swept under the rug”
It’s disappointing the NHL doesn’t have the guts to own it, instead putting out a potential new franchise in Utah, to deflect from this breaking story, it’s pathetic really. And what I think far worse is the timing of how the NHL released it “mental health awareness” campaign to allow guys to have a leave of absence from their team and that too, was used to protect the five guys that are being charged with rape. The five guys are: NHL players Michael McLeod and Cal Foote of the New Jersey Devils, Carter Hart of the Philadelphia Flyers and Dillon Dubé of the Calgary Flames. Former NHL player Alex Formenton, who now plays with Swiss club HC Ambrì-Piotta, is the fifth player. Which brings me to the male fans disgusting reaction to this on social media.

This is why women don’t want to speak up. Being raped is the one of the WORST things a woman can feel and go through and these men on social media are more concerned about their hockey teams, defending the guys, and to me, the teams who knew about this and covered it up helped move the players around is despicable.
As a woman I can vouch that we are taught how to defend ourselves against being raped, when how about we actually teach men NOT TO RAPE!?

Of course women who are hockey fans have to endure being called, “puckbunnies” because yeah, heaven forbid a girl likes the sport for the sport. What these aholes on social media don’t realize is that throwing around a term like “puck bunny” is the same as calling them a slut…it’s not any classier and it certainly doesn’t make you look like any more of a real fan- it actually makes you look like loser! 
Most guys feel threaten, by a female who know her shit and is not afraid to tell it. As if women don’t face enough struggle earning respect period in the world today, in the sport of hockey it is 100% worse! Men should be less worried about women making them look bad all awhile they are looking like a catty high schooler for being concerned with their ‘extracurricular activities’. ( I say that with a lot of sarcasm!)

Sexism is no stranger in hockey as it has been in football and even baseball.
The hockey PR departments ACROSS the league HATE women. Yes, I said it and I stick with it. 62% of men are employed by NHL teams while a whopping 37% are women. Not surprised. And if you look at their roles, that’s even worse. 
Women work the sidelines/benches. Do you see women on TNT at the desk? Do you see women on ESPN at the desk? Do you see women as the an analyst? 

Do you see any woman in a high ranking position?  

How many females do you think do an NHL podcast and are promoted by the NHL? 

If you scope out X , you will find thousands of podcasts done by males, and their guests are usually who…. Other males.

On my podcast, I had male guests. For example, one of them a crazy fan, and another was another podcast trying to get big names on his. He told me that he was going to have me on his podcast as that was the deal- I’d be on his he be on mine…. Do you think I was ever on his? 

Because men don’t want to hear women talk hockey .

If you look at some of the women that are hired …. The blonde chicks mind you. That’s the reason they are hired for their looks not for their intelligence. Women are hired so it doesn’t look like they are being discriminated against when, in fact, women are constantly discriminated against in the world of the national hockey league.. they even have this fake special day called women empowerment day…. Like they give two shits about women. 

Going back to my podcast, And the guy that I knew in the PR department for the New York Rangers…. He knew Exactly that I was asking to have Jacob Trouba on my podcast, constantly ignored me, never responded, and then when the controversy hit X, instead of reaching out to me, like a man would do to see if he could fix anything or apologize, he unfollowed me on Instagram, unfollowed me on Facebook to pretend, as if he never knew who I was…. Oh I have screenshots.. 

Trouba on the other hand, knew I was asking for him to be on my podcast, and instead of being a man and reaching out to me, decided to go on a podcast with men at the helm. Trouba showed you that he is sexist against women just as the PR department is…. Just as the New York Rangers organization is….. oh, and by the way, there is a sexual assault lawsuit against the owner, James Dolan. 

I’ve always thought of James Dolan, as a very savvy businessman….. but you can kind of tie everything that’s happened with women in the Knicks and the Rangers organizations together…. don’t forget he’s also had Isaiah Thomas who was accused of sexual harassment, and then put him in charge of the WNBA’s team that used to play at MSG. He showed a lot of disregard for women.
It would be a smart move for James Dolan if he actually showed some concern for women, and what women have to go through to be in sports industry. It would also make him look better with the news coming out of his sexual assault lawsuit.

But you won’t see any other guy on the New York Rangers stand up against Trouba or stand up against what the New York Rangers PR department has done or for that matter stand up for women. No, they’ll just wear those stupid purple jerseys in March for women’s empowerment, and then auction them off for “charity” 

That’s the sad part.
And fans are no better.





The NFL and Hollywood: The definition of hypocrites

….a women’s responsibility not to “provoke” domestic violence.” Those were Stephen A. Smith’s actual words on ESPN in 2014, in reference to Ray Rice’s two game suspension from the NFL for knocking out his wife, Janay, in an Atlantic City resort elevator. (Meanwhile, for those who don’t follow the NFL, Robert Mathis, another football player, was suspended for four games for taking Clomid, to help him & his wife have a third child in 2014.)

To say that a woman is “responsible” for a man’s actions is not only absurd, it is sexist. Let me enlighten ALL men that, a women doesn’t “ask” to get beaten and in the same breath, she doesn’t “ask” or “invite” any man to rape her either. The only actions a woman is responsible for are her own. Period.

Not the cold hard facts on domestic violence: The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports that 1 in 4 women will be victims of domestic violence at some point in their lives, 1.3 million women are assaulted by their partner every year, 85% of domestic violence reported is against women. It is estimated that 960,000 incidents of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend to 3 million women are physically abused by their husband or boyfriend per year. Women ages 20-24 are at the greatest risk of nonfatal intimate partner violence. Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. Domestic violence victims lose nearly 8 million days of paid work per year in the US alone—the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs.

Domestic Abuse starts off small. #1 FACT: Most domestic violence incidents are never reported. Domestic violence isn’t just an argument every once in a while. Domestic violence is an ongoing pattern of abusive behavior when one person chooses to control the relationship through force or intimidation. Fear and embarrassment are the reasons that many women do not wish to report the abuse or do anything to stop it. This is the reason most abused women stay in those relationships and blame themselves for the abuse.

And in the case of millions of actors and actresses not coming forward about being sexual harassed, or raped, until years later, the reason highlights itself. They were afraid of being blackballed in Hollywood.  How much further will this topic go? Will we just forget about sexual abuse, sexual harassment,  and sexism when this Weinstein story blows over? Because that is usually what happens. We never “fix” problems, or come up with solutions. All we do is talk things to death and then move on.

Same could be said about the NFL now. They are worst hypocrites. They make all their players wear pink for “Breast Cancer Awareness” and then they allow players to get second chance after second chance when they commit a crime against a woman.  They are afraid to lay down rules as we see with the National Anthem, as we are witnessing. Can you imagine the powerhouse the NFL could really be if they had strict rules that were enforced, educated the players on domestic violence, and then turned around and educated the public?  Can you imagine what true role models those in Hollywood would be in they stood up against sexual crimes, in spite of their own careers?

We can all help eliminate domestic violence and sexual crimes. Can we stop it? Probably not 100% but we can educate others after we educate ourselves first.  We should do this because every child, woman and man deserves that, no questions asked.

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