The Trend That Needs To End in 2025

Happy 2025 readers and fans!

We made it through another holiday season and I hope yours was a good one. Mine was quite busy. Between running my businesses, trying to branch out, holiday gatherings and going to basketball games to watch my nephew and niece play, it was hectic!
The one trend we see on social media every single new year is the one where folks use the stupid quote, “New Year, New Me,” and then manage to be the EXACT SAME person all 365 days of the new year. So, with that said, I am going to ask, can we just stop that nonsense? Seriously, what is wrong with folks thinking that they have to automatically change who they are because it’s a new year? Aren’t you proud of who you are?
Now, there is NOTHING wrong with wanting to IMPROVE yourself, but this concept that we have to all “change” ourselves COMPLETELY is absurd.

You don’t need to compare yourself and your journey in life to anyone else. And on social media so many people do that. She is skinnier, he is buffer, she is more successful, he is climbing the ladder, etc. Everyone’s journey in life is unique. And everyone’s life purpose is different. It would be VERY boring if everyone thought the same, dressed the same, acted the same, etc.

And maybe some folks posted up their big accomplishments and you feel you couldn’t post yours because they were not as big… to that I say this:
Every little victory you had in 2024 is important. It leads you to appreciate the bigger things and it helps you see that you can accomplish whatever it is you set out to do. So if your “only” accomplishment in 2024 was that you survived the year, you did it and be proud.

TO quote something I read recently, “Even though it’s great to have big goals, it’s easy to get caught up in the daunting list you have yet to accomplish. Instead of growing fixated on those, you should try to spend some time giving yourself credit for the things you do accomplish on a daily basis.”

One thing we all have control over is our mindset. Your mindset is what makes things happen and makes you tick. A positive, growth-oriented mindset can help you overcome challenges, achieve goals, and build resilience, while a negative mindset can hinder your progress and make difficulties seem insurmountable.
So, in 2025 if there is one thing that you can change for the better, it is your mindset. You can accomplish WONDERFUL things when you believe in infinite possibilities. And that starts with believing in yourself.

At the end of the day, some folks need to step aside that ego and really look within themselves so that they too can be “better.” It’s not that they aren’t good people, it’s that their mindset isn’t set on having them realize what is holding them back from accomplishing their goals and accomplishing their dreams. We all can be a little nicer to everyone in 2025. We can face our insecurities head-on and show more compassion and empathy.

But if our mindset isn’t where is should be, that is a hard thing to just flip a switch out of the blue. It takes time to do this.

We talk about change each new year, instead let’s talk about mindset. That’s something EVERYONE can focus on and in turn become “better” people. Unlike fixed traits, your mindset is something you can actively work on and change through conscious effort. When you put forth effort, things happen. We can change our mind and our lives, once we change our mindset.

Wrapped In Love

I am so excited to share with you the following….

I hate it when I buy expensive gift wrapping paper and it rips and it also doesn’t look that cute. So I did something about it and I designed my own!

So this holiday season … instead of going out to stores to buy your gift wrapping paper. Please think of me and help a small business grow.

Link – click here to purchase

The Silent Women Of The NHL

All last month I saw the NHL Public Relations Dept tweet out, “The NHL continues to celebrate Women in hockey…” and all I could think was, “What a load of crap!”

Why you ask?

Because it is a ploy to make you think that they 1) care about women at all and 2) a distraction from knowing or even thinking that the NHL is the ONLY professional league that does not have written policy to protect women in regard to sexual assault / domestic violence / sexual harassment – but no, let’s get the confetti and celebrate them! (Insert eye roll here) Not only that, but the women also that are in the NHL now, as wives and girlfriends are silent. Do you notice that? Do you notice that when you do have a woman who is married (or used to be married) speak up that woman is forced to stay silent and if they shall open their mouths, they are given, “The Scarlet Letter?”


As you will notice from some of these photos of the some of the women, they look literally identical. I sent a few people a photo of these two women, one is a GF and the other is about to marry a player on the SAME team. And the response I received were al the same, “They are sisters, right?” Ha! Nope. They are NOT related.


Here’s something interesting and I know it is going to rub some folks the wrong way but when the hell did that stop me? If you notice that almost all the women who are either dating or married to NHL players look alike. Now, the ones who are not the same “type” are the ones that knew their athlete when they were young and probably met in school or while they were in the AHL or even possibly out in the wide world. Those women are the women who aren’t in the mold they are “supposed to be” while the women who all look alike, are that for a simple reason or two: Its to keep the hockey culture alive and well and it is also easier to control a chick who is basic and practically the same than it is to control a woman who is different and extra. Some of the basic chicks don’t even realize this, but that NHL player ain’t with you because he “loves you and wants to build with you,” but because you are basic and easy to control. You will put up with his bullshit and NEVER say anything that goes against the grain.
Sorry but not sorry, that is the culture in a heartbeat.


Let’s talk about that for a second.

Think about how uniformed the military is for a minute. Everyone looks alike, everyone sounds alike, and everyone stays in line. What happens when you get out of line? If you break violations, there are consequences.

Think about Boston Bruins Wags for a minute ( Wags stands for Wives and girlfriends) The wife of Lucic suffered domestic violence and filed an assault charge but “miraculously” it was dropped back in February of this year because his agent and the team made it difficult for her to testify and the charges were dropped. But think about the WAGS whose job it is to ONLY smile, look pretty and be happy all the time.

NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN FROM THAT WAG GROUP SAID A DAMN THING ABOUT THIS.
NOT ONE SINGLE WOMAN THAT WORKS WITHIN THE BRUINS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THIS.

GARY BETMANN THE COMMISSONER DIDN’T EVEN STAND UP AND SAY THAT ASSAULT OF ANY KIND IS NOT TOLERATED IN THE NHL.

Why? Simple. It’s part of the NHL culture and it’s acceptable. So that is why the players go for basic chicks. A basic chick is EASY to control. A basic chick will not shake things up or cause a stir. A basic chick will not stand up for the other women in fear that they too can be assaulted or abused in any way. And of course, the guys will tell them to keep quiet because THEY DON’T WANT TO BE OSTRACIZED BY THE REST OF THE GUYS because “his woman” opened her mouth.

Think about Anna Kane for a minute. Everyone calls her “crazy” simply because she opened her mouth about domestic violence and how her daughter was taken away from her. The fact is, she is not crazy, what is crazy is that the truth she speaks triggers all those who want to live in this fake sexist world that is the NHL.
She needs to keep speaking her truth!

Something that I noticed from a NY Rangers wife on IG is the fact that she is AMAZING and she tries to have businesses and do things that make her happy outside of her husband’s hockey world. Every time she posts something where she goes off and does something amazing that she wanted to do she thanks her husband for, “Allowing me to be able to do it.” Um, excuse me? He “allowed” you do it? What are you, his slave? She should be allowed to do WHATEVER the fuck she wants to do. She is smart, beautiful and talented. She should not feel the need to thank him at all unless she is thanking him for support.

Another thing I noticed this past February. Jacob Trouba donated or painted some shit for Epilepsy NYC – His wife is a fucking doctor, and she is the photo you see below. The NHL public relations did NOT only MENTION her in the post, but didn’t even TAG HER! She knows MORE about Epilepsy than does the NHL and her husband Jacob! The reason is CLEAR why they didn’t mention her, it GOES AGAINST what the CULTURE is… and the sexism and misogyny at an ALL TIME HIGH!



And I won’t stop there. Sometimes these players pass around the SAME girl as they are appetizers. There is a guy on the Sharks that is married to a basic chick who dated another dude from a another team.

So before I continue let me qualify what a basic chick is or accepts for that matter. A basic chick accepts bare minimum at most. That’s it. Like I have said, they put up with the dudes bullshit. They never correct him, they are never supported publicly on social media or posted up, they never do anything else or demand to be treated better. They just accept basic treatment. The ones who are posted up are in a real relationship for the right reasons, the ones who aren’t, well, like I said, are only with him for the reasons that she is easy and breezy like I say below.

Why do you think I never “made it” dating an NHL player? Because I am extra and I am not going to sit there and let shit happen to the sisterhood that would be the WAGS. No way. I on the other hand, refuse to be tamed or groomed a certain way to “fit into the hockey culture”.
If you know me, you know that I protect all the people who are close to me. (Which isn’t that many but if you are in my circle, you are important to me.) I would though, as I have been told, would make an awesome hockey girlfriend, since I know the game inside out. I am a former cheerleader/ coach and I still work in the cheer industry so I know a thing or two about support and spreading positivity.

Now, I have NOTHING against a woman who wants to be a stay-at-home mom and just live off her husband’s means, if that is what she chooses to do. If a woman doesn’t want to better herself, that’s her prerogative. But I am saying here is the NHL doesn’t give women that option. You don’t see any woman who is married to a hockey player, who is a legend in her own right. For that matter you don’t even see hockey players on social media showing off their women like they’re proud of them, instead they hide them.
Did you know that 2 stars got married this year? Maker and Copp. But if you looked at their social media you wouldn’t even know that they were dating someone and the answer you get from guys as to why they hide their women from their social is a copout: “My life is private.” Yo, dude, there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between people KNOWING you are with someone and KEEPING that person a SECRET. And oh, By the way, A NY Rangers player or two does the SAME SHIT! These women are posting up them in their stories (which is literally a story for another day) and not posting on their feed about the “love of their lives”


And then there is this: These women are afraid to speak up about ANYTHING.

Last year, a NY Rangers had a player whose wife needed In vitro fertilization. That must not have been an easy road, but she did it and had a precious son. She could have been a spokesperson, a representative for all women who struggle. She had the platform to do that. But all she did was an IG story, and that was it. Was she afraid to speak up? Was she told to keep that on the down low?

Women or the WAGS don’t speak up about ANYTHING! They are the silent women of the NHL. They are JUST there to LOOK pretty when they can bring SO much more to the table.

The rest of the women who work in the league also work in silence. Imagine working for Gary Betmann who has two daughters and needs to “stay in line” so she can keep her job, which by the way, is rare for a woman to be working in this league in the first place since 36% of women work in the male dominant sport.

If you are a guy and you are the one saying, “Well, why don’t these women just come forward?” Here’s my answer for you to digest. When women come forward you men, DON’T support them instead you QUESTION and ACCUSE the VICTIM of what she is saying because OH My God, he’s your “favorite’ athlete. If women told you they were attacked by a wild animal you would believe them, no strings attached, but when a women tells you that they are attacked by a man, you question it. The worst is when you say they are “just thirsty, or they wanted that,” Um, not every woman is after a man for his money and I don’t give a flying fuck what the girl is wearing, no girl is asking for it. Also, you guys think it’s a flex to hook up with many chicks and be with “really pretty girls” that is not a flex, that just shows how immature and unstable you guys really are.

Also, I will not validate my feelings on social. I am sorry if this triggers you but if it does, oh well.
If you planned on commenting or a woman dating/married to an NHLer says “We aren’t forced to be silent we just don’t want to distract him or the team… blah blah blah…” I call BS. It’s not that you are forced NOT to open your mouth, it’s that you are scared as shit to open your mouth with fear. And that is wrong.

The NHL culture is AGAINST women. If it weren’t the commissioner would not be against creating a written policy to protect women and their partners.
Sexism is ingrained in the NHL culture as it is to socialize young males with masculine ideals. The process encourages young guys to embody certain traits such as sexism and misogyny and they are subjected to policing tactics that ensure that EVERY SINGLE NHL PLAYER adopts this way of life.

The best the NHL could do is come up with a dumbass slogan, “Hockey is for everyone” is a load of crap, whereas we are talking about sexuality, sexism, and bullying. By the way, Canada is so grossly engaged in the culture of hockey, that is drives that Country’s funding and sport policies.

If current player’s voices are needed and yet they will not recognize how they have objectification of girls and women, how can sexism and misogyny ever be challenged and changed?

Today, you see so many NHL players publicly revealing their struggles with addictions, is connected to this NHL culture that HAS TO CHANGE. Also, what is connected to this culture is the fact that the players are with hyper masculine ideals and that they are not manly if they don’t play through an injury. It bears to also note that the challenge within the hockey culture is that the culture is intentional. The guys struggle for what it means to recognize such behaviors. There is no room for a view of what it means to be otherwise; you are either part of the culture or you are shun from ever making it in the league. There can be NO player who is bigger than the league itself. And when there is, he is not treated well. If the NHL really wanted to celebrate women as women SHOULD BE celebrated, then this culture of having women be a carbon copy of another woman should not be a “thing” in 2024. EVERY woman is special in her own right. EVERY woman deserves respect, appreciation and love for what THEY bring to the table AND not TOLD what to bring to the table.

Why do men of the NHL want woman to bring the exact same thing to the table? What the hell are they so freaking afraid of?

And as I type this, I can guarantee you that behind closed doors some of the women of the NHL are abused and assaulted. If there is one thing, I have learned about watching hockey for as long as I have it’s this: I can pick up on vibes of the players who need anger management. So, if a player on the ice doesn’t get his way and get all heated, don’t you think he brings home that same type of vibe?

Note: there is data that backs this up. Don’t believe me, go on Google and find it.

To summarize, the problem stems from inside the league and blooms all the way around the league. The first step to create change is simple: The League needs a written policy and the players need to start being accountable for it.

So, will women finally speak up and have a voice or will they “stay in line” and “behave” like all NHL players want them too?

Time will tell, but in 2024, the TIME IS NOW.

Did ya understand that?

The Gaudreau brothers were cycling on a road in Oldmans Township on Thursday, Aug. 29, 2024, when a man driving an SUV in the same direction attempted to pass two other vehicles and struck them from behind at about 8 p.m., according to New Jersey State Police. They were pronounced dead at the scene.

Police said the driver, 43-year-old Higgins, was suspected of being under the influence of alcohol and charged with two counts of death by auto, along with reckless driving, possession of an open container and consuming alcohol in a motor vehicle.

Higgins told a responding officer he had five or six beers prior to the crash and admitted to consuming alcohol while driving, according to the criminal complaint obtained by The Associated Press. He failed a field sobriety test, the complaint said,

According to court records, Higgins had two prior cases in North Carolina during the early 2000s. The records show he was charged with DWI in 2005 but the charges were voluntarily dismissed due to the officer involved not showing up in court. Higgins also had a speeding ticket in 2001 that was dismissed because of his good driving record at the time.

The irony is that Higgins was an employee at Gaudenzia, a nonprofit drug and alcohol treatment center, at the time of the crash. He has since been placed on leave by the organization. So you know, he knew full well not to get behind the wheel, but he did it anyway because he got away with it in 2001 and 2005.

Footnote: NBC Philadelphia 

The entire NHL community has been grieving since August 29th. Well, almost everyone.

As I said, in a podcast out of 22 members of the New York Rangers only 4 players showed empathy and compassion by taking the NHLPA post and throwing it into their story and then maybe adding RIP or hearts. So many other players from every other team has shown respect to the Gaudreau family. 

The NHL pride’s itself that it’s a brotherhood yet it is far from my brotherhood . it’s only a brotherhood when they’re sexism involved , or homophobia and racism. Most players only pick and choose what they’re going to show empathy towards what they’re going to show compassion for… and unfortunately, a lot of of them are narcissistic, arrogant and completely out of touch with the world. 

The fact that MLB and NFL teams and players were classy enough to have a moment of silence or post about it, and some NHL players couldn’t even take the time to create an Instagram story or post something on TwitterX  shows you everything that you need to know about the league.

It should not matter if they were ever teammates, they even talked off the ice, he was part of the exact league that you are playing in. 

When Kobe Bryant passed away from that plane crash everyone in the NBA showed their compassion and their empathy. Even folks from the NHL, and MLB and NFL. Because it’s not that difficult to take your phone, go on a social media app, and post that. There’s no excuse. 

But it doesn’t surprise me in today society how not even just athletes are out of touch with the world, but everybody’s been out touch with the world.  People hate you for being authentic and speaking your truth instead of being fake and people pleasing. 

People don’t like boundaries, they want to use you as much as they can use you and then when they’re done with you, they just discard  you like you are trash. People also hate being called out, when someone points out said truth. The reason that people get so triggered is because they’ve been living a lie and living a lie is better than facing the truth. And what I mean by that is the fact that people will give athletes an excuse for how they are and who they are. They will give people in their community excuses for how they act, what they say about others, and how they go about their daily lives.

People today have no qualms about showing their insecurity, their jealousy and their envy, simply because somebody else’s light is brighter than theirs. Instead of celebrating those people, rooting for those people, they try to tear them down.

Just yesterday we had another school shooting, and it wouldn’t surprise me if social media played a part in that. You go on social media and people are trying to tear people down, bully other people, and not accept the fact that instead of asking questions about certain things, they judge them like they’re all high and mighty when they’re not even close to being that way. Nobody and I repeat nobody, including myself is better than anybody else. We are all imperfectly perfect.. we all have discrepancies. We all have flaws. And we all have strengths. That’s what makes us human. Unfortunately we don’t treat each other as human beings. 

People today don’t give a rats ass about anybody else other themselves. Of course young people today think they know it all and they have nothing to learn from anybody else because they know it all. When they’re just growing and evolving. And they’re afraid of doing that. Because that means they have to step into their authenticity and step away from having the fake life on social media where people give them reinforcing attention. 

I mean, let’s be real getting attention on social media is kind of fun. I get it. But life was so much easier and different before social media even existed. There’s some positives of social media. You make new friends on social media. You can network with other like-minded business individuals. You can put yourself out there. But there has to be some accountability. And I feel that if somebody has the nerve to try to dim your light, you have every single right to call them out on it. The old saying is true, if you’re gonna dish, then you gotta take it. 

That especially goes for the people that like to stalk other peoples accounts,  claim that they’re not stalking them, but they’re not following those specific people and then they talk about them like they know them and trash them. Lying about me won’t change the truth about you.  

One thing about me is that I will never go through life playing small, being silent, and being accommodating for everybody else.  I will never water myself down to make me more digestible for you. If I trigger you in any sort of fashion, that’s on you. Sometimes those who shine brightly always trigger those that rather live in darkness. 

So if I’m ever a bitch to you, did you forget that I was nice and nice and nice and nice…. Then I was a bitch? 

One thing I’ve learned during transforming my life over the last few years is that me being nice always got me disrespected, ran over and stressed out.  I’m not nice. I’m a good person and there’s a difference. People are afraid to get to know someone like that so they’d rather hate on them first instead of learning who they are because then in turn,  makes you a better person. God forbid we become better human beings. 

We can always learn from others so always be teachable. If you’re not then you’re afraid to evolve and you’re afraid to grow and you’re afraid to learn. 

The one take away I take from Meredith and Johnny’s relationship  from seeing all the photos is that they BOTH posted up on each other. They look at each other in every single one of those pictures with so much love in their eyes which  makes this even more heartbreaking. That’s the type of relationship that I want. That’s the type of relationship that everybody strives to have but sometimes is intimidated to have because it means being emotionally drawn to each other and being vulnerable and today people cannot be those two things. 

If anything, these types of heartbreaking situations are lessons for us to learn from. 

Life is short. It doesn’t come with the a set of instructions. It doesn’t come with the road map.. but it does come with moments that should be cherished and moments that should be enjoyed. We weren’t put on this earth to bicker with each other and fight with each other. We were put on this earth to help each other, to love each other and to realize that one of the greatest gifts is empathy and to understand that somehow mysteriously, we are all connected to each other. ❤️‍🩹

Being Released This Fall

The Book That Gary Bettman and company doesn’t want me to write.

This book will be written in 2 parts.

The first part will be my creativity in motion. Athletes from some NHL teams will know or maybe will know that it is about them.

Part 2 is the story of the NHL from a Female Perspective

IF you follow me on Tiktok, Twitter X, or Youtube, hints will be posted for part 1.


Men, The Bear, Bumble And Harrison Butker

I wasn’t playing on writing a blog like this, but seeing how the landscape has been against women even more than it has been as of late, I had to put my thoughts into words.

For starters, if you are not on Tiktok then you missed a lot.

There was this dude who seriously looks like the guy who secretly films women getting dressed in the changing room at a department store, started us off, by telling us that men don’t have to accept women’s rejection : AKA he told men that is OKAY to RAPE them. I highly doubt that he is a “dating coach” which in itself is creepy. But what sane “coach” would tell men that women are forbidden to reject him? My thinking is that this guy never had a date back in high school and/or the head cheerleader rejected him and he is so scarred by that, he has hateful views now towards all women.

If that wasn’t bad enough, there was a guy who put out the question, if women were in a forest would they want to be in a forest alone with a MAN OR A BEAR? He was not asking which one women would choose, technically, but it took off on Tiktok and women every where were answering the bear. You can imagine how much this triggered guys EVERYWHERE!

The men, oh sorry, the boys that were triggered proved over and over WHY women preferred to be alone with a bear instead of a man. When asked to explain their decision, many women responded that they know a bear would either leave them alone or kill them, whereas they fear the details of exactly what a man could do to them. And if we look at the culture that is being thrown at women today, I think it is safe to say, this is why women would choose a bear.

Here are some reasons why women choose the bear in case men are still confused:
A- No one would question us about what I was wearing, why I was wearing what I was wearing, and If what I was wearing was to lead on any man to believe I wanted sex.
B- A Bear would not film it and send it to his friends and post it online.
C- No one will question if the bear attacked really happened. And to add, they won’t go on social media defending the man in question with the saying, “Innocent until proven guilty.”

By the way, there’s a reason women are warned not to hike or camp alone, and it’s not because of bears.

1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. RAINN ( Rape Abuse, Incest Network) says on average, there are nearly 450,000 victims of rape and sexual assault every year in the United States. According to North America Bear Center- black bears – the most common bear in the United States – kill less than one person per year. On average, 28 people in the United States die each year from lightning strikes, according to all U.S. lightning deaths reported from 2006 through 2021

So, when women are saying that they FEEL SAFER in the FOREST/WOODS alone with a bear than with a strange man, and men, instead of trying to make things BETTER for women, are triggered by it and instead of trying to say, “Men should not rape, men should not act like pigs when it comes to women,” They are trying to gaslight, manipulate and force women to feel crazy and stupid for saying a bear. Then you hear guys ask the question why women who are abused and assaulted never come forward or come forward years later:

As many as 90% of those survivors never report their abuse to law enforcement, and more than 30% will never report their abuse to anyone (National Association to Prevent Sexual Abuse of Children).

What Happens To Rapists When They Are Caught And Reported?

  • 60% of rapes/sexual assaults are not reported to police, according to a statistical average of the past 5 years.  Those rapists, of course, never spend a day in prison.  Factoring in unreported rapes, only about 6% of rapists ever serve a day in jail.
  • If a rape is reported, there is a 50.8% chance of an arrest.
  • If an arrest is made, there is an 80% chance of prosecution.
  • If there is a prosecution, there is a 58% chance of conviction.
  • If there is a felony conviction, there is a 69% chance the convict will spend time in jail.
  • So even in the 39% of attacks that are reported to police, there is only a 16.3% chance the rapist will end up in prison.

Not only are we talking about rape and sexual abuse, but let’s not forget about domestic violence. According to National Domestic Violence Hotline, Over 1 in 3 women (35.6%) in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.

This is another reason why I am fighting to have the National Hockey League ( NHL) to have a policy in place to protect all wives, girlfriends, and staff of NHL teams against these crimes that DO HAPPEN IN THEIR LEAGUE!
The hockey culture and how they treat women is disgusting! The social aspect of the sport supports issues related to misogyny, sexism, homophobia, and xenophobia.

An anonymous quote from a hockey player on how the culture continues because whatever is SAID in the locker room, stays there. ( Same concept as VEGAS)
“There’s stuff that happens in the dressing room, obviously, talking about girls, parties, whatever is the case, that happens in there, that sort of stays in there for the most part. Well, on good teams it stays in there. Whether it’s who you’re hooking up with, if you got sent pictures from some girl, everyone sees them. So it stays in the dressing room and it’s a team builder. It’s not to embarrass people in front of the outside world.”

THIS ONLY GETS WORSE:
This locker room culture in THE NHL encourages and rewards particular performances of masculinity. And players who don’t adhere to implicit and explicit organizational expectations risk being ostracized.

So, when a FEMALE, wants to have NHL PLAYERS on a podcast – you are rejected AUTOMATICALLY.
So, when a FEMALE, wants to develop friendships with hockey players, THEY NEED TO BE CERTAIN WOMEN –
Beyond sexist barriers within the sport, there are misogynist ideas engrained that position women as objects and conquests within hockey culture- That is why you ONLY SEE WOMEN WHO 1- ACCEPT BARE MINIMUM, 2- WILL NOT OPEN THEIR MOUTHS ON WHAT THEY KNOW ABOUT HOW OTHER WOMEN ARE TREATED, AND 3- WHO LOOK A CERTAIN WAY!
Misogyny was undeniably evidenced in the alleged gang-sexual assault committed by members of Canada’s 2018 World Junior team, in the subsequent cover-up, and in the revelation that Hockey Canada had a fund that was used consistently and covertly to protect players.
The deeply entrenched sexism and misogyny within hockey culture contribute to these brutal acts of dehumanization. Yet, these connections remain unrecognizable because people are unable to confront the culture that permeates their existence. In addition, as this does not directly impact players, such as the consequences of playing through pain, the calls to confront sexism/misogyny are largely not coming from male players. Unfortunately, there is more impact when people within hockey resist the harmful impacts of the culture as people are more inclined to listen to and empathize with the protagonists in our national narrative and because status is used to legitimize particular perspectives. If current player’s voices are needed, and yet they cannot recognize the objectification of girls and women, how will sexism and misogyny ever be recognized and meaningfully challenged if it remains unrecognizable to those within the culture? Yet, as recent current events have revealed, this resistance is the problem at hand!
AND JUST THIS WEEK, A Native American woman who worked for the Chicago Blackhawks is suing the organization and its charity, the Chicago Blackhawks Foundation, accusing them of breach of oral contract, fraud and sexual harassment.

Then of course we have the dating app Bumble who decided to tell women to KEEP HOOKING UP with guys on their app because they are losing money and that in turn is all they care about! Seriously, I keep telling you all how TERRIBLE dating apps are and they filled with men who ONLY want to hook up, rape women, cheat on partners.. . etc.
Bumble fumbled, are now working quickly fix the damage caused by an ad campaign that pokes fun at celibacy and abstinence. They changed HOW the app worked, which pissed off A TON of women, and then did this ad. They did apologize, but.. THIS IS WHY WOMEN CHOOSE THE BEAR!

Now here’s the KICKER, literally, the kicker in all of this …

The Kansas City Chiefs Kicker Harrison Butkler, said at very conservative Catholic College told women that they shouldn’t be out here, climbing up the corporate ladder that they should be home, taking care of their husband and children.
If women decide to do that, that’s their choice it’s not for a man to decide a woman’s fate.
Which is kind of funny since his mom, Elizabeth Keller Butker is an accomplished academic who holds a degree in Chemistry from Smith College as well as a Master’s degree in Medical Physics.

How did his mom somehow raised him to be a MISOGYNISTIC & SEXIST man?

BTW Harrison, if you are reading this: you’re a kicker you don’t do hard things and you STILL miss. 

I have NOTHING against women who CHOOSE to be a stay at home mom, if that’s what you want be and that’s what you desire then go for it but for a man who kicks balls for a living to tell other women that their dreams don’t matter and that they should just be in the kitchen is what’s wrong; it’s 2024 not 1964.

Women can do a lot of different things and wear different hats and that triggers some men who can’t do hard things.

Now, as a Catholic woman, I don’t agree AT ALL with what Harrison has said AND here are the Catholic teachings that I have been taught:

1- We all were created to serve God. We all have a special purpose, that purpose is not the same for everyone.
2- Each of us were shaped differently. We all were given different Spiritual gifts, Personalities, and Abilities. What you are ABLE to do, God wants you to do. No one else can play your role.
3- Love your neighbor as you love yourself. Your purpose is to show love to others.

God doesn’t want everyone to do the same work.
God doesn’t hate any of us based on race, sexuality, or weakness.
God made us and our life started at conception.

Those in the church that preach otherwise are preaching their own agenda. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. Maybe Harrison forgot this. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. I think as a society we have truly have forgotten about love and how to truly love each other.
Love only embraces, and never attacks. It is of the Spirit, and thus incapable of attack.
What a beautiful thought.

Caffeine and Chocolate: our two main food groups.

I can’t believe that I haven’t posted in a month! That’s crazy, but then again that is how my life sometimes goes.
I have been traveling for cheerleading so now that the cheer season is over (well the travel part) I can sit down and update y’all about some exciting things that have happened in the past month and of course talk about the elephants in the room.

CHEER:

After working with this company for the past year where I sell my cheerleading curriculum- I am parting ways with them since I am developing my own cheerleading website working with another company to provide credit card processing payments with it.
The site will have the coaches curriculum needed to run a cheerleading team and program. Plus tools, scoresheet assistance, merch and of course choreography.
I think I choosing to do a blog every now and then just to list updates, but that will be on the site as well.

Podcast

I am still doing the audio only podcast through Spotify but I decided not to do subscriptions with it simply because A) I don’t want to have to record 2 podcasts B) I love sharing things with everyone, why limit it to you have to pay to hear this… ( I think that is stupid and its unnecessary but I thank those who did pay to subscribe!)

AND… My podcast is up for an Award W3 for best host with the guest I had on back in October! Some previous winners included: A 60 Minutes Podcast from Paramount Company and GoDaddy won an award for one of their original series…

BUT… I have joined Rumble and will be doing a separate podcast there besides posting some fun videos… The podcast there will be called The Revenge Tour and that will start some time in May.

I will be posting on my YoutubeChannel my series, “Behind the Scenes: The Diary of A Social Gal” this week and next week.

Ah yes, the elephant in the room. If you want to see the most judgemental, attention seekers, losers then you need to go to Twitter X.
Social media trolls are like those annoying characters from fairytales who live under bridges and try to cause trouble for passersby. But instead of riddles and tolls, they use inflammatory messages and outrageous lies to disrupt online conversations and get a rise out of people. They don’t want to admit it, but they are fans in denial AND that I live rent free in their little heads.
But can I admit something? I love them. Not all the time. But they really strive to prove their insecure and jealous while at the same time they make me laugh. You have to love folks who take the time to point out YOUR imperfections while they ignore theirs.

Oh, I have a surprise announcement …. shhh… so if you follow me on IG, Twitter, Youtube, Rumble, Tiktok, and Facebook… you’ll get it. The announcement will be different on each platform. …

Did you see me on TMZ?

I did a segment o TMZ on Alec Bladwin …. go ahead and take a look. BTW… I am a content creator so I added to this video and made it a little retro. 
In 2024 THIS IS THE APP that you should be using!
here is my code to use! CLICK HERE FOR CODE

If you don’t follow my podcast, here is the link to follow it and join me for the December 31st show. Do you how th social media platforms were ranked in the 2023? Do you know what trends are coming? Also a review of my year along with some surprises too! I also will be doing an IG LIVE on New Year’s Eve!

QR CODE TO FOLLOW MY IG

I will have a Christmas Blog for you Sunday. See y’all then!

Stop Being A Sell Out

Everyone needs their little tribe where people are allowed to be themselves, where people are allowed to have feelings, and where people are allowed to love and stand up for what they believe in.
People today want to keep us in a box. And athletes today wear the rose colored glasses.
It’s okay to feel important, but it’s not okay to feel that you are better than anyone else. No one is perfect, I’m not even perfect, far from it but what I do know is what empathy is.

And what I do is that sometimes you have to teach people in unconventional ways how to turn inward to feel empathy and love so that when they look outward they can see life in that perspective.

People spend way too much time being fake and embracing things that are not real while trying to break down anyone being authentic; including your “precious” athletes you root for. Everything to them is about being fake because that is what their branding is- if they didn’t get caught up in the fake world of materialistic wealth and being wrapped up in narcissism, I bet you that they too would be more compassionate without a camera crew, more loving and open, and more respectful.

With the holiday season here, that is my wish.
For people to open their eyes to authenticity and for people to see that life is best lived being real, not fake like you see on social media.
Hating on someone for realness, their opinions, or their unknown story doesn’t make you better than them, or a hero, it makes you weaker. Dimming someone else’s light doesn’t make yours shine brighter.

So, this holiday season; spread kindness, pay it forward, remembering that words have power but so do actions. Put the two together with good intentions and just imagine the world we can create.

Remember, without love, we’re nothing,

Break My Bed, Not My Heart

Here’s the problem… It’s two-fold.
The problem with having a genuine heart, is that people think you’re stupid. They may think they played you. But the whole time they played themselves out of meeting and being with a good person.
Athletes do this to themselves EVERY time. And us fans are STUPID for only expecting bare minimum from them just like women do for men that they date.
What is the bare minimum that fans except and think that the particular athlete is so ‘great’ to them?
All athletes NO MATTER the sport SHOULD freely sign autographs. Now, there are boundaries that fans should respect like if they are out with family and eating at a restaurant you don’t go up to the table while they are enjoying a meal begging for an autograph. But clearly when they are finished it is okay to ask. When they do events, before games, after games. BUT respectfully! If you placed yourself in this limelight by wanting to be a professional athlete, then THIS IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR whether you like it or not! Period.
I laugh at seeing social media posts from athletes who literally COMPLAIN about this- um, hello you make millions of dollars and you can’t take 5 seconds to sign an autograph for a fan? Remind me again why you chose this occupation. ( insert roll eyes emoji here)
But then here’s the other side of the coin- ALL athletes get a swelled head and their ego is enlarged when they start to see folks ask them for autographs, the media talks about them, they see social media posts about them and then we start to idolize these dudes. This then makes them start to think that they are BETTER than the regular Joe and on the SAME playing field as a celebrity.
But here is why us fans SHOULD NOT idolize these guys. You have to remember rule one of marketing/branding: Rule one your image as an athlete is EVERYTHING. They are in fact their own brand, and what they do in front of the camera is what in fact makes fans idolize them.
How many times have you been on TwitterX or Instagram and seen your favorite player doing something for charity, or at a hospital, or at an event that is designed for them to look like they give a shit? The kicker is, I am SICK of hearing that this guys “really do in fact care” about us, the regular Joe. I am TIRED of hearing that they are “really great dudes” when their actions when the cameras are not involved are totally different.
Recently some hockey players did this charity thing called Shoulder Check in memory of Hayden Thorsen who loved hockey and excelled as a goalie in Darien, Connecticut. The 16-year-old died unexpectedly in May of 2022 and his family is using his passion for hockey to help Hayden’s legacy live on. The idea is wonderful. The mantra is reach out, check in and make contact. What a beautiful way to remember a kid who was that person who made sure others were okay. But to think that pro-hockey players from the NHL actually will “Reach out, check in and make contact” with fans who on social media maybe post things that are about mental health, or a fan that reaches out to a player to tell them how they love them, is UNREALISTIC to say the least!

The truth of the matter really is, that behind a screen you don’t know what ANYONE in life is dealing with and sure you can “study” their posts, and you can Google their name, but that is not going to give you who the REAL person REALLY is! People don’t live in their pasts anymore, they grow, adapt, change… and we ALL including the NHL players have skeletons in our closets that don’t define who we are today!

A friend of mine posted that Mika Zibanejad spent time signing autographs at the Shoulder Check and yes, he’s VERY good at doing this, and again, this is the bare minimum that fans have come to expect and not hold athletes to a higher standard. But his quote from the event was very telling, “You can see if you’re hurt physically sometimes but mentally, it’s very hard to see that and to see the signs.” Not true. Not true at all. I think most people ignore the mental signs because they just don’t want to deal with that.
So here are the signs that are as CLEAR CUT as daylight that people are experiencing a mental breakdown:

Symptoms of withdrawal

  • Not showing up for work for one or more days or calling in sick.
  • Missing scheduled appointments or social events.
  • Slipping into poor lifestyle habits like unhealthy eating, not getting enough sleep or can’t sleep, poor hygiene and not exercising.
  • Losing interest in activities or hobbies or things that brought you joy.
  • Not wanting to leave your home or be with others.

Symptoms of depression

  • Feeling very sad, hopeless, helpless or worried.
  • Being irritated, frustrated or having outbursts.
  • Having trouble concentrating.
  • Having thoughts of self harm or suicide.

Symptoms of anxiety

  • Feeling pain, fear and uneasiness.
  • Having nightmares.
  • Unable to remain still and calm.
  • Nausea
  • Heart palpitations
  • Cold or sweaty hands.
  • Dizziness.
  • Upset stomach.
  • Trembling or shaking.
  • Trouble breathing.
  • Panic Attacks.

See, we all see these signs but we pass them over as just “normal” when they are not normal. And do you really think a pro-athlete is going to 1) care and 2) check on fans? That to me ins unreasonable to even think! Most of the time they don’t even check on their teammates nor they deny that they are going through a rough patch because they don’t want to be seen as weak. Again, we have the male stereotypical concept, that a man is weak asking for help and men can’t show emotions.

Recently, if you read this blog or follow me on social media, you know that I have been asking Jacob Trouba, Vincent Trocheck and Ryan Lindgren to do a fun segment with me called “Coffee With The Captain (and teammates)- which is basically 30 minutes of talking about why they take their coffee the way they do, hockey questions I have and just plainly have a fun – fun questions like do you prefer Pretzels or Potato Chips- getting to know each other so I can see them OUTSIDE the RINK and WHO They TRULY are as PEOPLE. Well, I have been asking for 2months and they look at the videos and they ignore me. They treat me like I am trash. I’m not someone they “need” or who is “important” so they don’t even respond at all.

NOTHING exposes CHARACTER MORE than the way you TREAT people you don’t THINK you need.

My point is, STOP putting these guys on a pedestal when they don’t give a rats ass about you.

Remember, all they do in front of the cameras is JUST for SHOW – it’s not who they GENUINELY are.

And if this is not who they genuinely are, and they truly are the “good guys” then they respond to me and do the segment. Cause they care about people and they remember where they came from… Don’t worry, I ain’t holding my breath but I will find a NHL player who actually cares and who will do this with me.

The saying is true, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.”One should not judge the worth or value of something by its outward appearance alone. For example, “That man may look very small and insignificant, but don’t judge a book by its cover – he’s a very powerful man in his circle.

Remember, karma, she’s a bitch. How you treat people will ALWAYS come back around to you.
And if this who Jacob, Vinny and Ryan genuinely are… then their true character has been exposed and it’s all a show as to who they pretend to be… But if this isn’t who they genuinely are, then they will do the fun segment with me. But make no mistake.. I will find a NHL player who will do the segment with me.
I have worked too hard to keep playing small.
I never will discount myself and my worth.
I deserve to be respected whether I am a celebrity or not.
I know what I bring to the table and I just raised the bar.