Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Summer vs Fall – Which lasts?

Each summer you always hear the phrase, “summer romance” and each summer people expect that to not only happen, but to last past the summer.

Then of course, you have people who “fall into love” during the autumn months. Then you see some of those couples still together when winter comes around.

This brings me to the question, which season love is the best kind of love, and which one lasts; summer or fall?

If we think about this rationally, the reason we see a lot of summer flings or summer romances is because in the summertime we are more relaxed, more put-together, more generous with our time, and infinitely more adventurous. Most of the time, those romances fizzle out simply because when we head back to our reality, which is when autumn hits, and the carefree environment we were counting on, is gone.

When autumn arrives, people go back to regular school, work, and packed schedules, leaving little time for the high-intensity dating of June, July and August. Many couples treat the season as a temporary break from reality, making the end-of-summer transition a natural, expected stopping point. Most casual seasonal relationships rely on shared fun rather than a deep foundation of shared values.

Then there are those who fall in love during the fall season. These relationships seem to last simply because testosterone levels can peak around the autumn equinox, naturally aligning with a biological push for connection. Also, if you have been on Tiktok, then you have heard women call the fall and the winter, “cuffing season,” which literally can be described as a time when women are actively seek long-term stability as temperatures drop, (cuddling season) moving past casual interactions into committed partnerships. Women want a sense of stability when the outside world feels chaotic in the fall and winter months.

Unlike high-energy summer romances driven by carefree mindsets, autumn love is characterized by a desire for warmth, steadiness, and choosing a partner with clear intention. Psychologically speaking, autumn naturally lends itself to a slower, more mindful rhythm compared to summer’s fast-paced adventures. The weather also plays a big part in this. Cooler temperatures bring natural chances for physical intimacy—snuggling under blankets, holding hands, etc. We’re back to fall favorites, football, hockey, basketball, fall festivals, baking pies, carving pumpkins, or taking scenic drives. We’re back in OUR own natural rhythm, which means it’s easier to be ourselves and with that, others notice who we really are as well.

So, while summer romance might be “hot” it usually fizzles out. Yes, every summer may have a story, but every autumn has great opportunities for growth and connection.






Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Guys in your twenties, don’t knock it until you try it.

( The video attached is for those over the age of 18 )

Dating double standards are ridiculous.

The one that still stands out is that men are celebrated from dating a younger woman, but when the opposite happens, holy cow! Recently I read a tweet from a woman on Twitter questioning if it’s okay for her to date a younger man. Wait, what? You are asking permission from strangers if it’s okay to date a younger man? What is this world that we live in!

For women seeking men, though, old-fashioned gendered ideas around age still persist for many. So what are the pros and what the cons for this dating dilemma?

Asking women this question here are the top reasons why older women ( And by older we mean over 35 dating men in their 20s) want to date younger men:

Sarah: I find that younger guys are so much faster to have the ‘what are we’ conversation.

Jane: Younger men tend to have higher sex drives, And as women, our sex drives tend to peak in our 40s.

Cindy: Younger guys are just less complicated and a lot more fun. Older guys have been in long-term relationships, and some of them are even divorced. They have really complicated commitment issues.

Now here are some guys who tell me their reasons for wanting to date an older woman:

Joe: Honestly, they’re so much more emotionally and mature, not as insecure, and our conversations are incredible.

Tim: I am attracted to older women because they’re often more confident and authentic than the younger girls my age. They are the real-deal, so to speak.

Peter: The mature woman focuses less on trying to win me over and focuses more on enjoying my company. There are no “love games.”

Women want to date a man who will become a partner, not a project. We don’t need to “mama him” to death, and we don’t want a guy who plays games either. Most older guys come with baggage; and a lot of it. They constantly talk about previous relationships and why they didn’t commit, blah, blah, blah. Younger guys don’t come with all that garbage and they aren’t trying to sell you the reason you should give me a chance either. – They are confident, not insecure.

Here are a few Pros to a woman dating a younger man:

A younger man has more energy and is more willing to try things than his older counterparts. In turn, doing new things increases dopamine in the brain, triggering a desire to spend more time together and assisting in lighting your sexual fire. The pro: A longer span of time before he’s reaching for the Viagra.

Not only is there fire in the bedroom, but he’ll come up with creative date ideas that bring back romance and make you feel empowered and appreciated.

Less baggage but that doesn’t mean he lacks communicating. Be selective about your battles and learn to compromise on things that aren’t vital to your relationship.

Cons (Depends on how you feel)

Younger guys like to hang out with their peers more often than older men. So be prepared to share him with his friends.

The reality is that your biological clock may be ticking away while his isn’t even be turned on. It might be years before he decides that he wants a family and then what? (This depends on how you both feel about kids- remember though, there is a thing called adoption as well.)

He may prefer texting you over calling you and he may get jealous faster seeing you talk to all the men you may know from your past or even your job.

Conclusively, If both parties are open to dating, you might have a blast with each other.. And it is entirely possible that you could fall in love with each other and have a long and happy relationship.

Because, as they say, age ain’t nothin’ but a number. You need to focus on finding the partner that is your perfect fit, regardless of age. ( Note: Legally over 18)
And remember, character over looks; personality over money; and loyalty over materialism.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Every Summer Has A Story

Its that time of year again when I am reminded that, “”In every girl’s life, there’s a boy she’ll never forget & a summer when it all began.” Love may start in Spring, but it evolves in Summer.

For me, I can remember way back when to the first summer love I had, in fifth grade. His name was Michael. He was the new boy in class and at first I did not like him at all. (Love/Hate relationships are always intense) He would drive me absolutely crazy by constantly shaking his pen when it ran out of ink. (Like shaking your pen is going to help!) So I came up with an idea to write him a note and tell him just how annoying he truly was. The only problem was that his older cousin was in eighth grade and when she found out that I wrote him a note and told him that if he didn’t stop it, I was going to then throw my pen at him, she kindly told me to cut it out.

And that is when the romance began.

We got to know each other so much so that he even sang to me at lunch one of those inappropriate George Michael songs. Once June came around and school was out, that is when our romance really took off. He would call me and we would hang out, but sadly like every fling, things ended the following year. Okay, so that is not necessarily a summer romance, and yeah, I was eleven, but its got to start somewhere for everyone.

Years later, when I was a junior going to be a senior in high school, that is when another “Mike” came into the picture. He was one year older than me and would visit his best friend who lived near me. That is when I came up with a dance group with all the girls that lived in my neighborhood and they danced my choreography that I created to all the hot songs of the 90’s. He would sit in his car and watch. When I would walk by his car he would stare and smile at me, and I literally felt like I was going to melt!

This particular story brings up even more memories that I won’t get into now, but trust me, some of those memories I am fond of while others are heartbreaking.

So what is the deal with summer, romance, flings, and love?

The summer time is when love seems to rear its head and capture our imagination. During the summer, we feel free, we feel the promise of being able to forget what has happened so far and the promise of starting over. Its a time when also, people want to show off all the winter weight they have lost, so people are actually more attractive in the summer then any other season.

The other reason why the summer time brings out the beast called love is because we get to meet people we never have seen before. Do you all remember the movie, “How Stella Got Her Groove Back,” and ho she met her fling, turned romance while on vacation? (Yes, its just a movie, but it does really happen!) We are more open to being impulsive, the sunshine is also brighter, we are happier, and the chance of turning a hot day into a steamy night is greater.

Ever hear the saying, “Live it up?” During the summer, that is mostly everyone’s motto.

So how can you have a summer fling turned romance?

A- Get a Summer Job – Work at a camp, beach, pool, etc. You will get to see these people everyday so it will be easier to get to know them and have them get to know you.

B- Become a visitor of a beach or pool – You don’t necessarily need to be a worker instead you can be a visitor and get to go on the prowl in your bikini or suit. Strut your stuff!

C- Volunteer – Find a place that fits your personality and you’ll surround yourself with similar people. What a better way to not only help others but also surround yourself with like-minded people.

D- Hang out with friends- Summer time is usually the time when you get introduced to friends of friends, people who you normally don’t see on an everyday basis. What could be better than shooting the breeze with someone your friends know? This is so much better than exposing yourself on those dating sites.

E- Go on vacation- Go somewhere you never have been before or even if you go to a place you love, you will be surrounded by new people and have a chance to have conversation and make googly faces at strangers. Or you will get lucky and see familiar faces from previous summers and maybe a spark will lit underneath them and a romance will begin.

If you really want the summer fling to last and turn it into the romance of your year or ultimately the one you end up with forever, the two things you need to remember are:

You need to express how you feel. There seems to be some unwritten rule that says summer flings have an expiration date and that we just assume the romance needs to be over with. But if you don’t ask or tell the person how you feel, you may actually be letting go of the person you were meant to be with forever!

The second thing you need to do is include him/her into your everyday after-summer- is -over life. He/She needs to see you, talk to you,when the beach days are over with and the colder weather starts to creep on in. But lets not dwell on this yet, for the summer is only starting and the promise of fairytale romance is in the air!

Two cheers to the summer and the potential of remembering a summer that began with a look, a smile, and a kiss.