Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

What Adam Levine Did Is Not That Uncommon; Sadly

On Tuesday after Instagram model Sumner Stroh claimed she had a year-long affair with the singer and then the floodgates opened up. Model Alyson Rosef shared her alleged direct messages with Levine in a now deleted Tiktok where she told everything that he said: “I shouldn’t be talking to you you know,” . Alyson claimed she had many more messages, but didn’t want to show them as they are “not appropriate.” Another woman, Maryka, a comedian, posted DMs from Levine on her IG story. One where she says to Adam, “Dude, aren’t you married lol” and he replies with, “Yes but it’s a bit complicated,” adding, “I might get away.” The final woman to come forward was his ex-yoga instructor who claimed he sent her messages while in a relationship.

This type of behavior has every one scratching their heads, ( but me) because he is married to a freaking Victoria’s Secret Model… and blah blah… looks are everything for men! And of course as I write about NFL players that ONLY care about dating supermodels and VS models, bikini girls.

Shallow men get with beautiful women for one reason: to show them off.

Shallow men cheat on beautiful women why: because they are ego maniacs.

They have low self-worth and make up for it by showing off their human commodities. All the kindness, soul and talent in the world will easily be traded for the next perky butt.

A guy who shall remain nameless told me why he cheated on his now ex-wife, who happens to be a gorgeous actress, ” I grew emotionally disconnected. I happened to meet some women and became friends with some of them. A spark grew with a few of them and it sometimes led to sex. When you cheat on someone it is not because they are more attractive than your partner, it is because they are giving you something that you want. They do not have to be better, they just have to fill a void.”

However, when it comes to “looks” and “attractiveness,” the definitions are often confusing and vague, and can depend on the era, culture, and individual.

For many people, “looks” don’t necessarily refer to someone’s physical features. Many people find physical attributes like personal style, hygiene, or posture attractive, too.

It’s also important to note that sometimes attractiveness doesn’t have anything to do with your physical attributes. Attractiveness can include many things that go beyond the physical, such as:

  • having a sense of humor
  • having shared interests with your partner
  • being kind
  • having values and principals
  • making your partner feel safe and happy
  • being attractive to others

That’s all to say, looks aren’t the only thing that can attract you to someone.

On a societal level, our definition of beauty today is different than it was 500 years ago. Most notably, in the last decade, there’s been a social media-induced phenomenon in which new standards of beauty are evolving out of the digital space.

Instagram dysmorphia a perfect example of how virtual communication has given rise to different ideals of beauty that tend to affect the nature of dating.

This is a phenomenon in which people who use social apps develop body disorder. They want to look like their online selves, even though their images online don’t reflect their true appearance and have been modified using filters and visual effects.

Scientists believe that women’s evaluation of the physical attractiveness of a mate is influenced by indications of the potential mate’s genetic quality as well as the mate’s ability to protect and invest in her and her children.

Of course, these evolved preferences are complex and interact with other factors. Individual differences, culture, and environment also play a major role in shaping what you find attractive in a potential partner. it’s important not to generalize about someone’s attractiveness preferences based on their gender.

In a relationship, personal qualities like humility and kindness may become much more important in determining the success of the relationship over time.

While looks may get potential partners to turn heads, what really holds a relationship together has much more to do with how two people connect on a deeper level. 

Looks fade. Personality is forever. 

And speaking about Direct Messaging on social media, Absolutely NO ONE has the right to take a private conversation public UNLESS there is a serious situation at hand. Trying to embarrass someone else with the words they told you, just for 15 minutes of fame, is not right either. I never reveal WHO DMs me and WHAT they say unless there’s a case for it. ( Life or death, a court case, or defamation for starters.)

Private conversations should ALWAYS stay private.
But let this be a lesson to some guys out there that if you want to flirt with other girls WHILE married, you are asking for trouble. If you aren’t happy then get divorced. The ones this stuff hurts the most are the wives and kids left behind.

Two last thoughts:

  1. There is no such as a home wrecker; it’s a myth. If someone else was able to come in and destroy your relationship it’s because your partner opened the door and let them in.
  2. Men be like, “you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife” but a woman is supposed to make felons, liars, and cheaters into kings.

I rest my case.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Sex, Relationships and The NFL

Being that Friday’s episode of “The Recordings of Fan Girl #Sarcasm” will be about this “lovely” topic of conversation I thought, hey, since I am not doing my regular podcast , Sassy Nation tomorrow, let me divulge you all for a moment.

If you bought my best seller, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid? 2nd Ed” or the follow up, “Relationship Impossible” you read a couple of things:

Online dating is often touted as the solution to dating frustration. You only have to deal with people who meet your standards. Which really, can’t happen because of choice overload. (Too many options for any one person to handle.) All we have are our words and our photos online. Whereas in person we have hundreds of thousands of verbal and non-verbal clues to give us an intuitive grasp of who we’re talking to and whether or not we’re into them long before we go up and introduce ourselves.

There are many NFL players as I have mentioned that use Tinder and other dating apps to meet up with their “hook up” for the night. As I will mention in the podcast on Friday, you have many players that tend to think they are celebrities, act as if they are better than the average person, and then give in the pressures of this “life” to date a “model-type” girl because, let’s face it, they are very superficial. Now, it’s important for me to mention NOT EVERY NFL player does this- there are some that have morals, values, and are just great down-to-Earth guys. But, I ain’t talking about those guys here. I am talking about the guys that treat women as if they are sex-objects and then complain on social media that they are “gold-diggers” when they created the bandwagon themselves.

Some NFL players have created this image of this “ideal” woman, so when regular women; regular, wonderful, real women fall short, they reject them. That way they never
have to settle down and then everyone can still feel sorry about poor, lonely you.
And they have NO idea just what BAD position they end up putting themselves when they A) use a dating app for a 1 night stand and B) when they buy a girl their attention.

As you will see, online dating isn’t what you think it is anymore. Yes, you may have stories of people who know someone who has met online, but that doesn’t mean that it actually works. What that means is that, that person you know just was lucky enough to meet someone with whom they think they click with. It doesn’t mean that the relationship is going to last either. All it means is that after searching online, that person decided to settle down with someone. With STD’s up 75% and sex offenders using dating sites at an all-time high, if you really want to meet someone, stop putting forth the effort online, and actually go out there and meet people. Network, volunteer, join a church group, go to a coffee shop, sporting event, etc. The point being is, the more you take yourself into real, actual situations, the better chance you have at actually meeting, “ the one.”

The first thing you see online is someone’s profile picture and dating profile. Not only can they post fake pictures, there have been people who post pictures of what they looked like five years ago! They also can tell you they love life when in fact they complain about just about everything. When you meet someone in person, they can’t pretend they don’t really look like that. There’s no fake picture or who they truly are. You can’t read body language through the computer.

Any site that “claims” to be able to match you to your perfect mate if you fill out all 60 questions, is a hoax. There is NO scientific evidence that backs up these algorithms. If they claim that their scientific algorithms work, why do you need to spend 9 -12 months to find someone with whom you should totally click with right away?

When it comes to love it seems we are at the mercy of our biochemistry. First there is a lust, then an attraction, then love. If we get down to the science, attraction happens in the first 30 seconds. You can’t do that online. Dating online is totally different. Two Words: Choice Overload. Not only are there way too many people on these sites, but you would have to have gone out on 100 dates before you actually have chosen your “perfect match.” Now seriously who has time to not only read through all those profiles, but who has actually gone out with 100 people they have met online?

When you go on a search for love, you are looking to settle. But when you let love find you and unexpectedly, you find the person who is meant for you. Online dating is good for one thing, banging and the quick fix while going out and meeting people the traditional way is for those who want the real thing and refuse to settle. You have to show people you are emotionally available to connect and online you can’t feel or see that connection at all. Not only do you connect emotionally faster in person, but pheromones are known to be involved in sexual attraction and during the most fertile time in her menstrual cycle, a woman gives off a different scent which may make her more attractive to potential male suitors. How can you do that online?

We use Yelp to check which restaurant to go to. Pick movies using another app. We are so anxious to control the outcomes that we are unable to take any real risks. We don’t see Andrew or Andrea as people on dating sites, we see Andrew or Andrea, the 70% perfect match. We don’t see them as people, we see them as objects.

A study found that positive personality traits actually increase perceived facial attractiveness. So if you are just basing your choice on looks, you maybe choosing in correctly. When you find someone to date traditionally, you already can see or get a glimpse of that person’s personality while online you are only going by what they are telling you.

When you meet people traditionally, you typically see them in a social context, such as how they interact with workmates, friends and family members. Online is made of words and images.

Researchers estimate that 25% of rapists found people to assault through online dating services and being scammed in person is less likely than online. Online dating is great if you want a casual fling, but not for anything longer lasting because there are so many dishonest people seeking cheap thrills. If a situation arises, you can split fast and a click here or there, you have your next fling. Marriage is down 50% because everyone is falling for the, “Your perfect match can be found on this website,” crap. All that time you “try” and get to know someone online, you could be actually physically getting to know someone you met in person.

With the discussion on dating, it’s not just about love, marriage and then the baby carriage. It’s about finding someone with whom you can foresee yourself spending the rest of your life with, sharing visions and dreams, as well as the possibility for raising up children together. It should not be about finding the “perfect” partner, because there is no such thing. Instead it should be about finding someone who knows that they are lucky to have you. Relationships are a full time job, don’t apply if you aren’t ready.

Most don’t even know HOW the apps actually work:

For example, eHarmony’s system is flawed because it relies on conclusions from married couples and a fundamental premise that similar people will be happy together in the long-term. But married couples often project similarities onto one another and adopt similar interests over time, so those are the results of a relationship rather than what inspires them in the first place. As for Match.com and other dating apps, they gather information like hobbies and interests the same way that Netflix does. They do not gather any information that is related to what will make a user happy in a relationship.

Tinder and Hinge work differently. Essentially, Tinder used an Elo rating system, which is the same method used to calculate the skill levels of chess players: You rose in the ranks based on how many people swiped right on (“liked”) you, but that was weighted based on who the swiper was. The more right swipes that person had, the more their right swipe on you meant for your score. Finally, when there was enough people on Tinder and Hinge, the AL based solely on the ways users select many of the same profiles as other users who are similar to them, and the way one user’s behavior can predict another’s, without ranking people in an explicitly competitive way. So, the longer you’re on an app, the worse the options get. You’ll see Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, PlentyofFish, they all do recycling of people with whom you already said NO to.

This means that people may unknowingly skip over potential mates for the wrong reasons. The person you see on paper doesn’t translate neatly to a real, live human being, and there’s no predicting or accounting for the chemistry you might feel with a person whose online profile was the opposite of what you thought you wanted. Offline, that kind of attraction would spark organically.

Take a close look on Instagram and you will get a sense of which girls have created a “fake persona,” to gather attention, while the real, down to Earth girls show their
true character online. For a relationship to stay you need character. Personality is a superficial connect, whereas with character, you look for connection. So for a long term relationship, there has to be a shift from a superficial level to a deeper level –

You don’t need the internet for that.

We will discuss Friday: CLICK HERE FOR THE PODCAST

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Say His Name: Cannon Hinnant

I’ve been torn about how to react to news of the killing of the 5 year-old little North Carolina boy that’s making the rounds on social media and NOT the mainstream media. As he rode his bicycle, the perpetrator (his next door neighbor) walked up to him, placed a gun to his head and executed him in broad daylight. Because the child was white and the shooter is black, many are contrasting the news coverage (or lack thereof) and reaction to this killing to the reaction to the death of George Floyd.

Though he was no saint, George Floyd didn’t deserve to die in the fashion that he did. BUT… George Floyd was a 5-time convicted felon. He once held a pregnant woman at gunpoint while she was assaulted, threatening to shoot her in the stomach. He was well-known by the police.  We gave George Floyd four televised funerals, a folded American flag, over 70 days of rioting and millions upon millions of dollars donated to his family. Hollywood held massive protests for George Floyd, including the NFL, NBA, MLB and NHL players, paid tribute to this man.

What does this child get?

Where is Lebron James, Malcolm Jenkins, J.J. Watt, Dwayne Wade,  Odell Beckham Jr.  Demarcus Lawrence, Lamar Jackson, Carson Wentz , Derek Carr, and others? Did these athletes tweet or post that they’re “heartbroken”  at the news of Cannon Hinnant’s execution death?  Did Black Lives Matter even condemn the actions of Darrius Sessoms? Of course not!  Why do you think the mainstream media never covered it?  It’s not the agenda. We all know that if the colors were reversed, we would never hear the end of it. But because the color of skin is what they are, most people will never know that this heartless crime took place. The way the media is manipulating us is to purposely to divide us.

This child was sinless. He saw no color. He’d committed no crime. I can imagine him smiling at the approach of a neighbor, who he’d likely seen before, never suspecting that he was about to be harmed, much less have his brains splattered on his own lawn. There will be no protests, no riots, no cries for justice. Young black men won’t be targeted and killed in retaliation, as many police officers have been. Hollywood celebrities won’t provide him with a golden casket or fund multiple funerals in cities across America that will be televised and broadcast live across social media.  “Black privilege” won’t become a trendy phrase and this child’s name won’t trend on Twitter. Tens of millions of dollars won’t be raised to support the battle against systemic child brutality and abuse, and “CHILDREN’S LIVES MATTER” will never be painted on Broadway in New York and have justice for Cannon billboards put up all over the town thanks to Oprah.

Black Lives Matter doesn’t care about the gun violence happening in Chicago and New York. Black Lives Matter doesn’t help the black kids in the ghettos and doesn’t try to help those kids stay out of drugs and gangs.  It’s a group that only shows up when a white cop ( who really never should have been allowed to stay a cop) kills a black man.  And the fact that every Sports League; NFL, NBA, MLB and NHL paid “homage” to George Floyd and Black Lives Matter is a joke.  These leagues don’t have backbones, instead they want to appease their players.  These players don’t understand that the reason we should stand for the national anthem is to honor all those lives that we lost on 9/11.  Those innocent people were all of different colors, religions, backgrounds, yet we HONOR them simply because it happened on our soil.

Holding a sign,  wearing a T-shirt, chanting a song, taking a knee, or going on your soap box  ( Twitter and Instagram)  isn’t going to change a damn thing!  It’s the actions that will finally make a difference.  Getting your hands dirty to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

I believe that we are all created in God’s image. I believe that an evil, wicked hatred is spreading in our nation like a cancer.  My heart breaks over the division we are seeing.  People have become so jaded.  They look at everything that happens and have to “add” color to it.  They look at everything that happens and have to blame someone for it.  Instead of showing compassion and kindness towards everyone.  That is the one thing I remember from 9/11- the kindness that everyone showed each other afterwards.  We cared about one another. Not because of skin color, but because we all bleed red.

I pray daily for our nation and everyone in it.

His name was Cannon Hinnant. He wasn’t racist. He wasn’t violent. He wasn’t a criminal. He was an innocent five year old boy.

When you honor a black man who was a criminal just because he was killed by a cop- you aren’t changing the narrative, you are continuing the narrative.

 

 

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

A sneak peek of my upcoming book, “Relationship Impossible”

Coming in 2021 is the follow up to my best selling book, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid? 2nd Ed”   The book will be titled; ” Relationship Impossible,” as we continue to discuss online dating, dating apps, social media, double standards, men and dating,  single-hood,  sex advice for women and men plus a lot more.

With technology being the sole way that people today communicate, there has been a lot said of social media and of texting.  Many people use direct messaging as a way to talk to someone without having to “give up” their phone number right away to talk.  This also can be seen as a red flag because any guy that keeps refusing to give out his number is mostly cheating. BUT… in the beginning DM’s are the most popular way to reach out and “touch” someone in 2020.  This method of communication brings a lot confusion and misery at the same time because a lot of guys leave girls on read.

For those who are still in the dark days of communication, here is what to be “left on read” means:  To read someone’s message or messages and not give any response, particularly on an instant messaging application where it is visible to any user as to whether or not the person has read a message.   Now that we cleared this up, here are 5 reasons a guy leaves a girl on read: ( The explanation for each will be in the book.)

1) They are avoiding conflict.

2) They are overwhelmed.

3) They lack confidence.

4) They don’t see your worth.

5) They don’t know what to say.

NOTE: Just because it says read, doesn‘t mean it was meant to be read. They might‘ve seen the message come in, not wanted to open it, accidentally did and just moved on without responding.  Or they are attracted to you and like you—so they are going to play a little game. They are going to make you think the complete opposite.  Which can always back fire on a guy- they don’t think it will, but 9 out of 10 times it does.   Some girls then get bitchy ( myself included) and after weeks go by, leave a nasty, “You are such a jackass,” type message for not answering me at all.  This is how this “strategy” the guys seem to think will work back fires because they made us think number 4 on the list, when in fact they see our worth but want to play games instead.

Being left on read, just doesn’t happen in the dating/relationship world. It also happens in the social media world of athletes and fans.  Have you ever responded to an athletes Instagram story and hoped to get a response? Have you ever sent them a message and hoped they would respond to you?  If the answer is yes, then you are not alone.  95% of fans of sports teams and athletes have sent messages to their favorite players to only be left on read.  5% of athletes actually respond back.  That is a fact.  This is because of course, number 4 on the list, where they think they are “better” than you and that you don’t deserve a simple response back.  Now, if your message is one of hate you don’t deserve them to a respond but instead you deserve a good kick in the ass for being rude and vile. That type of stuff is uncalled for!

Athletes as I have pointed out in the past, don’t understand social media as well as they think they do. There is so much power within the platforms that they don’t use it as it is intended but rather use it to make themselves, time and time again, look ignorant.  ( See Chapter 7: Social Media and Dating Apps: A New Game for Today’s Athletes. )

The “hook up” culture will also be discussed at length but I also will touch on the sex industry once again.
In the best seller, which was also up for book of the year 2016, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid 2nd ed”  we discussed that not only is porn one of the top selling industries, but also adult toy and sex accessories are a growing second. There are websites for guys, for girls, and for couples. And more and more women are having “slumber” parties and I don’t mean sleepovers. (see, its not just the guys!) here is a website that is designed for women to purchase sex toys, sex guides, sex outfits, (you know like sexy maid, sexy cheerleader, sex firefighter,) and sex products that add a little erotica to a playful evening. The best thing is that this company is like “Tupperware or Avon” where women can work and they get to go to another woman’s house and “show off’ the products. (No guys, there are no
demonstrations, sorry to burst your bubble there.)

** You can purchase Hello Love, Where’s Cupid? 2nd Ed Here —-> Link  **

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Change Takes More Than Just Voicing Your Opinion

See here is part of the problem: people create MORE HATE using Social Media. If you want change it starts with YOU. Not everyone is going to run to agree with you at first. That’s okay. Eventually some will. But change starts from not allowing YOURSELF to promote hate which lately social media has been doing more of-  we cling to our own point of view, as though everything depended on it. Yet our opinions have no permanence. If we substituted our view for insight and understanding. Think how much better this world would be. #ThinkBeforeYouPost
To answer those wh it’s not a platform to “ speak the truth” it is a platform that is supSee here – part of the problem- creating MORE HATE using Social Media. If you want change it starts with YOU. Not everyone is going to run to agree with you at first. That’s okay. Eventually some will. But change starts from not allowing YOURSELF to promote hate which this post does. So what happens to the people who don’t agree with the protest and others “take it in their own hands” and harm them because you were so “brave ” to call them out? Who is held accountable? We cling to our own point of view, as though everything depended on it. Yet our opinions have no permanence. If we substituted our view for insight and understanding. Think how much better this world would be. #ThinkBeforeYouPost

To answer those who keep telling me that social media is a platform to “speak the truth,” I have this to say: No it’s not a platform to “ speak the truth” it is a platform that is supposed to BUILD UP the community not call people out who don’t agree with you! Calling people out because they don’t agree with you is hypocrisy.  You want unity. You want peace. Yet, there you are on social media calling those people out because they don’t agree with you- and looking very ignorant and hateful while doing it.  Showing more people hate by calling them out on a platform that is supposed to be about building up a community does the opposite.

Seeing all the NFL players and some athletes who are in the NBA and NHL come out this week and “voice” their opinions and then go after others who share a different view.  Can someone tell me, how does that help things and how does that change things?  And most of these athletes NEVER EVER do ANYTHING to change the narrative that they so “eloquently” tweet or post on Instagram about- it’s just words. ( BUT there have been a few professional athletes who have physically STEPPED UP- Dak Prescott, PK Subban, K’Andre Miller, Patrick Kane,  3 hockey players- 1 football player)

This is not the first time we have been here with a cop who should have NEVER been a cop killing someone in custody. But because everyone does the SAME thing after this happens, we all end up in the same pattern.  You can listen what I mean here: Click Link  You can also watch me talk about what I mean here: Click Link

If you want to know what’s wrong with our society look no further then Chrissy Tiigen, Steve Carell, Seth Rogen wanting to bail out those who burned down a city, destroyed businesses that had nothing to do with Floyd. This doesn’t honor him. This makes his death now in vain. What does stealing a flat screen from Target help with the memory of The man that was murdered? You lost your cause the minute rioting and looting started.

As beautiful as this sentiment, ” We need to rid the world of racism” is,  sadly it’s unrealistic. Love is real. Hate is real. Both are human emotions. Both exist. You can’t force people to only feel one emotion and think one way. We would not be a free society if we did things that way. BUT…. It’s how you take the negative emotion and change YOUR life- point the thumb first to YOU before you point the finger not to others. Change takes works. Change starts with you.  We can make a difference if we finally get out of the same pattern we are in ( click the links to get an understanding of what pattern I am talking about) and we look at people for who they are on the inside not for what they look like on the outside. ( This also goes for fat shaming, calling people ugly,  focusing on a woman’s looks more than her heart, and judging the worth of somebody’s appearance just from looking at their social media posts.)

It should NEVER matter what a person looks like – because in the end we all have the same organs and we all bleed red.  It’s not okay to judge ALL people based on 1 person. Like in any profession, there are bad cops, bad teachers and bad doctors. They do not define everyone. United we stand, divided we fall. 

REMINDER: Virtually every single American condemned the murder of #GeorgeFloyd and did so immediately. Every color and all sides of the political spectrum. American cities are burning over something we all agree with. Now marinate on that.

 

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52% Of Americans Already In Relationships Using Dating Apps While In Quarantine

Yes, you read that title correct.  And people wonder why having a meaningful relationship is so hard these days!  The pandemic has cut many couples off from one another as they are forced to follow the quarantine orders in their states. A new survey finds that singles are now turning to online dating to fill their needs, even if they already have a partner.

42 percent of both single and attached Americans had downloaded a dating app while in quarantine. The big difference however was that more people who already have a significant other are apparently taking their browsing even further.  The survey also found that a third of attached Americans said they’ve reached out to their ex while in isolation even though they already have a partner. While 37 percent of single Americans said they did the same thing.

6 out of 10 people say they are willing to lower their standards and talk to someone outside their “usual type” while in isolation. Two-thirds of people surveyed said  because of social distancing it was making them crave physical intimacy.  Researchers found that 41 percent of attached Americans say they’ve gone on a virtual date during the quarantine.  While Only 27 percent of single people had done the same.

Another interesting thing to note is that a lot of professional hockey players have been using social media a lot more and when interviewed they mention that they have a “girlfriend” when on their platforms such as Instagram, there are no “life signs” of this girlfriend that they speak of.  It also shows you that many folks are using social media such as Instagram and Twitter to “hook up” with others while in quarantine and try to hide their real lives by not posting certain people on their platforms.

 

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

**Sneak Peek**

Here is a quick sneak peek of the follow up to my best seller, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid 2nd Ed” which I am in the process of putting together now.

First the title:  I will release the name of the title on my IGTV series: Behind the Scenes: The Diary Of A Social Gal

Secondly The Content:  There will be 10 chapters in the book.  Most of them will be about dating apps and online dating.  There also will be a chapter or two about social media dating, which is trending up this year as a place where folks believe they can meet their “special someone” without having to deal with scams, cheaters and those who are looking for hook ups.

Thirdly: I will talk about women issues, give men some advice about pick up lines and how to actually pick a woman up the decent way, and update you on some of the stories I told in the previous book.

Fourth: I will talk about athletes, dating apps and……

It’s going to be an AWESOME book and I can’t wait to share it with all of you!

update

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Behind The Scenes- Continued

 

We are now almost done with competition season! So far my team finished 3rd in the first competition we competed in and this last time, we finished 2nd ( won a trophy!)

Did you know that you can follow along on my Youtube channel and see BOTH routines as well as my behind the scenes footage to practicing!

You can follow along on myInstagram as well as my IGTV channel.

One more week to go – and it’s the BIG ONE: Sectionals!

Then after that, I start planning for the next season.

Next blog post will be the behind the scenes of me meeting and talking to some athletes as well as writing my follow up book to “Hello Love Where’s Cupid? 2nd Ed”

 

 

 

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

The Diary Of A Social Gal ( Part 1)

(Photos Courtesy of Click Images Inc. )

What comes to mind when I think about building an empire?  First and foremost, hard freaking work! Being a #girlboss has it’s ups and downs. Seeing so many young girls thinking that it’s “so easy” to build a brand, build presence, and build your company, always makes me laugh and roll my eyes.

I started SassyGirlPR in 2008.  At first it wasn’t SassyGirlPR it was just me, Stephanie being a freelancer. I wrote for many blogs, many websites, and even did some ghost writing for celebrities and others.  Then of course I started to write my own stuff and have a voice.  My goal when I write, is not to have others know MY opinion, but to THINK about the other side of the story.  Then of course I wrote my first book, “A Bird’s Eye View”  which was a nonfiction book and talked about many topics.  Once I got my feet wet, I guess you can say the rest is history!  I got offered to write for many other sites, one being Blogher. Not only did I write for Blogher and have one of my pieces go viral,
“This Woman Does Not Support The Women’s March” but I was a third-party consultant for them and this is where I got my start with #SocialMediaMarketing –

I did campaigns for JcPenney, American Idol, AT&T, just to name a few.  And I instantly fell in love with the concept and the idea.

Now I started to learn and teach myself all about social media and how to use it to market businesses, books, blogs, etc.  And I have to say, I had very good success at it – I mean, my books and blogs were being read in other countries and it was just amazing on how I connected with so many people.  This by the way, is the purpose of social media: to connect with others on a positive note, not like it is used today to spread hate and misinformation.

In the meantime while all this was going on, I was teaching Preschool, Pre-K and writing toddler programs for schools.  I presented at the NAEYC in 2000 and loved teaching the little ones.  We’ll get into this at another time, but I built my business Sassy Productions Inc,  as a side job, and let me tell you, I tried to incorporate a lot of other businesses, but those failed.  Those failures are what helped me grow, helped me understand business, and helped me become who I am today.  I learned so much from the failed business attempts that is why I took eight years of building SassyGirlPR – now known as Sassy Productions.  I wanted it to work.  I wanted to be my own boss and play by my own rules.

Timing is everything in life, as is having patience.  Life is process for that matter. We learn as we progress.  So today, I not only run a social media marketing company, handle PR relations as well, write blogs, write books, and help other businesses, I did it all on my own terms.

2016 I became an Auntie.  That was the perfect time to step away from teaching and focus on myself and my nephew.  And things have just taken off from there.

So you see, life doesn’t always work out the way you think it will. There will be turns, stops, obstacles, at every corner, but with patience, perseverance and never stopping enthusiasm, you can start to build your own empire- one piece at a time.

Find The Diary of A Social Gal Parts 2 and 3 here:( Friday and Saturday)

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Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

The Time I Dated A Calvin Klein Model

So, back when I was 24 years old, I dated this guy who was a Calvin Klein model off and on for about a year.   At first I thought it was pretty neat. But as the year went on I knew that I made a huge mistake.  Oh yeah, sure he was what we would call, “hot,” but I learned very quickly that looks on the outside are not a mirror to how someone is on the inside.  That’s why every time I see guys on the internet or hear how much athletes want to date models, I cringe. (Then I roll my eyes)

Our society STILL focuses way too much on a person’s outside rather than on a person’s inner beauty.  Inner beauty, especially to me, is the most important thing I look for in a guy.  Yes,  that physical spark is needed,  but looks are so overrated.

That Calvin Klein model  may have been “arm candy” but inside he was colder than ice. (Is that even possible?)  He cared about money, cars, materialistic stuff and but he didn’t care about how I felt, what I wanted, he had zero compassion about others, and I was so worried that he wouldn’t “love me” based on who I was, that I had to pretend I was someone I wasn’t.   I can also point out that the other models were just as narcissistic, selfish, greedy, and flat out rude as he was.

It was from this that I learned never to base dating a guy on how he looked but rather than to base it on how he treated me and how he also treated others.  A person’s personality, their compassion for others, and how they aren’t afraid to be themselves as well as not making me feel as if I can’t be myself, are the ways I now measure men.  Of course, I would be lying if I didn’t say that sparks that are driven from physical looks are necessary, but it’s not how I make a decision anymore.

It’s also important to note that I want to date a man who accept me for who I am, support my dreams as I support his, and build me up to be a better person each and every day.  I just don’t want to date simply to date. Another reason why so many relationships fail is because so many people do this; they date to just date instead of dating for a relationship.

Closing, we need to stop judging others based on the outer shell of a person. The saying, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover,”  is so true. Why be so shallow?  Dating is challenging to begin with, adding extra pressure to yourself and another person is stupid. Beauty can be intoxicating, but it’s also very misleading. And in this Instagram world with so many damn filters, why are we so obsessed with fake and not being real?

Yes,  outer attraction matters but in today’s crazy world it shouldn’t matter that much. Don’t get caught up in the  Instagram perfection of physical beauty that will quickly fade back once the filters are gone. If you lead with your soul, you’re more likely to find yourself in a committed, lasting relationship.