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The Nice Girl/Guy Syndrome

The worst thing you can hear when someone tries to set you up with someone is, “He’s such a nice guy!,” or “She’s really a nice girl.”  The first thing that comes to mind is if he’s (she’s) such a nice guy (girl) why are they still single? The next thing that comes to mind is, “Will I be attracted to him (her)? Do we have anything in common besides being nice?”

Yes,  I have been set up with guys who were “nice” but being “nice” just doesn’t cut it as a reason why I should date someone or let alone meet someone.  I need to first be attracted to him and then I need to have some common interests; reasons for me to pursue a relationship. It’s a total waste of time to date or meet someone because they are described as, “nice.”  The weather is nice, my new shoes are nice, and even enjoying a lazy Sunday alone is nice.  People need to be more than just nice.  I hate when people say, ”He’s a nice person once you get to know him.” They might as well just say, ”He’s a dickhead but you’ll get used to it.”

Do you know how many times I hear guys say, ““I’m just a nice guy. Seems like women these days don’t appreciate that. They rather date assholes instead of giving a nice guy like me a shot.”  My response is usually, “Why do you need to be so whiny?”  Being nice doesn’t make you ultimately entitled to dating me or anyone else for that matter.   That behavior doesn’t make you earn the right to date me.  Everyone should be nice to each other. That’s a concept that society never has taken to heart.

Most of these so-called “nice guys” are angry SOB’s. They are angry because they have been rejected one too many times and have the perpetual inability to attract the women they’re interested in.  These “nice guys” have become less appealing to a potential partner. That’s not to say that women aren’t attracted to, “the bad boys,” which usually is the comparative to a “nice guy.”  This is the guilt trip that most “nice guys” try and play against you to get you to date them, because according to them, “Life isn’t fair and we always pass them over for the bad boy.”

Here’s the kicker: Nice guys lie, cheat and can treat you like crap just as bad boys can.  Being nice means nothing. Now, being respectful is a totally different subject. I hate to be a downer, but the “good guy” isn’t the magic bad-boyfriend remedy most women might think he is. Been there, done that! 

So when someone says to me, “You are such a nice girl, I can’t believe that you are still single.” After I roll my eyes, let me tell you why I still am single; because I choose to be. I have been labeled as the nice girl my entire life.  Sometimes that is a killer. Why? Because when it comes down to actually telling someone how I feel and I bluntly tell them, I am seen as someone who  probably just “snapped,” or I am “overwhelmed.” How can a nice person be so sassy and sarcastic?  Don’t get me wrong, I am kind to others, respectful to others, but in the dating world, I hate being seen as just a “nice girl.”

But as I have grown up and really, “grown” these past few years I realize that I am a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need to rely on a man for anything. I can make my own money, make my own choices and also make my world the best world it can be. I am not desperate for attention, desperate for love and not desperate to be a plus one that I know not to settle for less than I want and I deserve.

It sucks being seen as the “nice one,”  but it’s better to be nice to yourself first and foremost.  At the end of the day, I am the one who lives with how my life has played out. Why would I want to change that simply to just change it?  “I’m single as a dollar and I’m not looking for change.”

 

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5 Things Feminism Isn’t.

Back in the day women were told how to catch and keep a man, how to breastfeed, how to raise a family, etc. These women were told how to be a housewife because that was all they were “supposedly” capable of doing. When women in the 1950’s found out that this was the way men actually, truly thought, they just weren’t outraged; they did something about it: and that is how the true feminism movement started. When women got together to talk, the words, “career” or “inferior to men” never were part of the discussion simply because they found themselves embarrassed to even mention it. The question then beckons, “Were feminists back in the 50’s and 60’s really the true definition of a rebel or were they just seen as troublemakers?”

Feminism is NOT the journey to find your true self. Even though there are writers, feminists, and even professors who will try and make you believe this but trust me, this concept is nothing but hogwash.

Feminist is just a word. It’s a word that conjures up hate, resentment, and setbacks. And Feminism does NOT make all our lives better as some will argue. You can demand the world take you seriously without it.

The truth is, only when people make extreme and take extreme measures, so movements get the attention they deserve. And with social media today, it’s a lot easier than you can imagine.

There is ample evidence that the more mainstream media girls consume, the more importance they place on being pretty and sexy. A 2006 survey of 2,000 girls showed that they repeatedly described the pressures of being perfect- thin, please everyone, and dress correctly. So instead of feeling that they have a choice in how to be a woman they want to be, they feel that they must not only have it all but be it all. ( Be smart and stunning and wear a tiara and a cape)

Here’s the lowdown:
1- Feminism will not help you find the right partner.

2- Feminism will do nothing for your sex life. The only thing it can be counted for is the fact that women now have the right to use birth control. But it doesn’t make your sex life better or worse.

3- Shaving or waxing your privates will not make you more feminine and it has nothing to do with feminism.

4-Those women who have plastic surgery to make themselves look better, due so because feminism beckons that they look perfect. Get a nose job so you can function, not so you can look perfect.

5- Feminists argue that dieting isn’t about being skinny, but that is it about having power.

It’s the way a women competes with a man in a “man’s world,” is nothing but hogwash. Dieting should be about health, not about competing against a man or for a man.

Equality.

If we keep saying that one sex is better than the other, how can we actually be equal?

Everyone, male or female deserve to be treated with respect. Everyone deserves love and everyone deserves a chance to be who they want to be.  That was the initial goal of feminism back in the day until the man-bashing women took over the movement. Just like I have learned that not all men are the same, the same can be said about women. All women aren’t into this man-bashing thing. Some of us are goodhearted, sweet, kind and understanding. So to all those men who have given up on finding someone who wants to give you the world, don’t. She is out there, I swear.

Everyone deserves true, real love that is given from the heart. Don’t ever doubt that you deserve it.

Life can be hectic, confusing, painful, unpredictable and who knows what may be around the next corner. But eventually you learn that the human spirit prevails, hearts open and love surprises-–often when we least expect it. And we don’t need “feminism” in order to know that.

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The Release of “Diary Of A Drama Queen”

I’m so excited to announce that February 28th, my upcoming book, “Diary of A Drama Queen,” will be released on Amazon as an eBook.  The paperback will be available on Barnes and Noble dot com in the coming weeks, so you can get the paperback exclusively through me or on my author page on lulu dot com.

I have Meet the Author events coming up- in person and online.  I also will be holding contests and giveaways! It will be a fun next few months.

SO if you don’t follow me on Facebook , Instagram, or GoodReads, you will miss out on the FUN!

 

drama of a diary queen

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

I Still Don’t Support The Women’s March

Last year I laid out as to why I did not support the Women’s March and this year my position still has not changed. ( Click here for last year’s article)

A march of angry women in every city won’t change anything.

The Women’s March a year ago aimed to start a movement of women who would continue their activism long after they had packed up their silly little hats and went home.
The #WomensMarch took place in January 2017, but the #MeToo started in October 2017.
For all women who will claim it’s a part of the March, it’s not.
If those “brave” women came out the night of the March, it would have made it dynamic. But they failed to correlate one and the other.

The March last year were all women who were reeling from Hillary Clinton’s loss to President Trump in the 2016 presidential election. Some black women felt betrayed that 53% of white women voted for Trump, while 94% of black women voted for Clinton, yet some underrepresented women felt their issues such as racism, discrimination, police brutality, LGBTQ inclusion, and immigration, were relegated in favor of issues that matter most to straight, white, middle-class women. (Source: The New York Times.)

Many groups felt that they were not welcomed in the March. One of women groups who felt silenced in the march were those who are anti-abortion. The Women’s March partnered with groups like Planned Parenthood, and refused to partner with anti-abortion organizations.
The head of the Women’s March was quoted as saying, “We’re not looking for folks to fall in line with the Women’s March agenda,” she said. “We understand that every organization and every individual will approach their strategy for how they engage in the movement in their own way. “

The Women’s March is “an attempt” at unity, but it failed last year and has again this year. All these protests do is separate us even more, they don’t bond us together.
The Constitution recognizes a number of inalienable human rights, including freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, freedom of religion, the right to keep and bear arms, freedom from cruel and unusual punishment, and the right to a fair trial by jury. Next year why don’t they all buy airline tickets to Egypt, Turkey, Afghanistan, Iran, and any other Muslim country to fight for their sisters rights over there?

FACT: If it hadn’t been for the Republican Congress of 1920 that voted for it. The Democrats would’ve taken longer for you to have that right! The 19th Amendment to the Constitution, of course, gave women the right to vote. It was passed by Congress on June 4, 1919, and ratified on Aug. 18, 1920. Go and tell that to all your liberal friends, I dare you.

My self-worth is not tied to what society says I should wear, how I should speak, who I can date, and what I do for a living. I’m a strong, independent adult, capable of taking care of myself. As a woman living in 2018, I am not oppressed, neither is any other woman today living in the USA. What right has President Trump taken from women? The answer: none

In the age where actual action is the only way to make change, every person that has held a picket sign in 2017 and now, still hasn’t caught on to that. Picketing and protesting is the old way things were done. By actually standing up and being the one to make a change is the only way in 2018 anything can change.

Instead of taking that job that dictates how much money you will earn based on gender, stand up and demand equality.

Instead of feeling the need to sleep with the boss to make it to the top, work hard to earn it.

Instead of “crying wolf” and looking for pity, stand up and be that example.

That is how change occurs.  Not by posting quotes on social media, marching or putting on a self-pity show.

Change is never easy. Adults have a hard time with it- kids are easier to adapt at it. But if you want to evolve, you need to actually take that step towards it, not backwards steps.

Celebrities can be put on their pedestals to give the most profound speeches. But again, that does nothing because they aren’t taking action, physical step by step action. They are just listening to hear themselves talk. It looks good for their publicity.

The bottom line is this: You can talk the talk all you want. But when you don’t walk the talk all it is in the end is just a lot of noise.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Sex, Lies, and Abuse: How the #MeToo Won’t Change Anything

If you ever read my review on “Fifty Shades of Grey,” then you know where I will be going with this article. If you never did read it, let me paraphrase it here for you: “Christian Grey has sadistic sex that leaves Anastasia sometimes bleeding and too bruised to move. The fact that Fifty Shades has taken eroticism violence against women and re-branded it as romance, is something of complete irony. Love is not abuse, and abuse is not love. Just because our society today have erased the shame of hooking up and joke openly about adult entertainment, doesn’t mean that we should fall for what Christian Grey truly is: an abuser. What the movie “Fifty Shades” wants women to believe is that women can fix violent, controlling men by being obedient and loving. That in a nutshell is false. It’s not okay for a man to use sex to control, manipulate and introduce pain to a woman. Christian Grey believes the physical pain a man would inflict on a woman is not as bad as the pain of losing him. Not cool. Not cool at all.”

I can tell you that Fifty Shades of Grey grossed $166.2 million in North America and $404.8 million in other territories for a worldwide total of $571 million, against a budget of $40 million! And most of the women who went to see this movie, bought merchandise and the book, NEVER complained about sexual harassment, sexual abuse or sexual assault. They were also part of this #MeToo movement, which is hypocrisy at it’s finest.

The #MeToo movement has gone from bad to worse. It doesn’t help women at all. Instead it takes the core part of what true feminism is; equality in the workplace, and make it even harder for women. What man in his right mind is going to now want to hire a woman, let alone be left alone with a woman in his office? And what is worse is the fact that some women are taking advantage of the situation by using their sexual relationships they have had in the past with men they worked with, relationships that were consented. Not to mention that sleeping with a boss or co-worker, didn’t get them to where they wanted in the workplace or that the relationship ended badly, they now turn around and say that they were sexually assaulted. Some have also been proven to have falsified evidence to say that they were abused forty years ago.

That’s another thing. If you are abused, you don’t wait forty years and then turn around and say, “Oh, I was afraid for my career at the time, or that I didn’t think people would believe me.” And I am supposed to believe you now? The woman’s health and mental state should ALWAYS come before career. And in that forty years that you wait, you let the guy develop a pattern of behavior. Besides the fact that people do change over that amount of time as well. I can personally tell you that I am not the same woman I was twenty years ago. I can only imagine how these men must feel who are being accused of this, forty years later. I don’t care if it was five years ago, either. Time to come out and say something is the moment it happens, not when the “best opportunity” for the woman to come forward.

That is wrong on so many levels.

Also, has it ever occurred to some people, that willingly sleeping with a boss or co-worker is not assault? The only time it is assault is if you are blackmailed to do so. Then it’s classified as rape. When it is not consented sex, and the man continues to do so, that is considered rape. Rape is, never okay. I repeat, rape is never okay. Now we as society are still dealing with rape, as being one of the highest percentage of crimes year after year, but the media doesn’t talk about it. You hear stories on the news, but there is never a discussion on any talk show of how to curb this crime. Rape kits are also to blame for why most guys “get away with it”

Last week in my of my hockey groups, this guy posted a picture of a woman in the front row behind the bench, wearing a low cut white shirt, along with her coat, opened, and a hat on. You can bet that there were sexist comments, as you would think there would be, on a post like that. The bottom line of why I bring it up is simply this:

This girl wore that shirt on purpose. It’s obvious. But the funny thing is, she’ll wear that shirt, be noticed for all the wrong reasons, and then turn around and sue guys for sexual harassment. (I’m making a point, not saying that this girl in the photo will do that.) That’s what’s wrong with it. Not the fact that she set guys up to even look at her. She totally knew the deal. The sad part is she used her body for that attention instead of her mind. When women stop falling for the “Let’s dress a certain way to be noticed,” crap, then maybe a woman can be appreciated for her brains, not her boobs.

On WFAN’s Facebook page, which is totally being bombarded with negative posts about it’s new afternoon show. I saw a few very sexists comments that talked about how women do’t know how to talk about sports. That women have no place in that category. See; double standard is still alive. Men think they know “everything” and that women are “dumb, stupid, out of touch, or belong elsewhere.”  Maybe when men’s perceptions of women change, women will change. After all, both sexes tend to do things to please the other instead of doing things that please themselves.  We try so hard to make everyone else around us happy, that we forget that the most important person’s happiness is our own.

If that is the one lesson that we all can learn from #MeToo, then I hope most learn it. Remember, respect is earned, not a given.  You need to respect yourself first and foremost if you ever want someone else to reciprocate that respect.  I hope in 2018, the media makes a woman famous for expanding her mind, not her breasts.

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The NFL and Hollywood: The definition of hypocrites

“….a women’s responsibility not to “provoke” domestic violence.” Those were Stephen A. Smith’s actual words on ESPN in 2014, in reference to Ray Rice’s two game suspension from the NFL for knocking out his wife, Janay, in an Atlantic City resort elevator. (Meanwhile, for those who don’t follow the NFL, Robert Mathis, another football player, was suspended for four games for taking Clomid, to help him & his wife have a third child in 2014.)

To say that a woman is “responsible” for a man’s actions is not only absurd, it is sexist. Let me enlighten ALL men that, a women doesn’t “ask” to get beaten and in the same breath, she doesn’t “ask” or “invite” any man to rape her either. The only actions a woman is responsible for are her own. Period.

Not the cold hard facts on domestic violence: The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports that 1 in 4 women will be victims of domestic violence at some point in their lives, 1.3 million women are assaulted by their partner every year, 85% of domestic violence reported is against women. It is estimated that 960,000 incidents of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend to 3 million women are physically abused by their husband or boyfriend per year. Women ages 20-24 are at the greatest risk of nonfatal intimate partner violence. Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. Domestic violence victims lose nearly 8 million days of paid work per year in the US alone—the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs.

Domestic Abuse starts off small. #1 FACT: Most domestic violence incidents are never reported. Domestic violence isn’t just an argument every once in a while. Domestic violence is an ongoing pattern of abusive behavior when one person chooses to control the relationship through force or intimidation. Fear and embarrassment are the reasons that many women do not wish to report the abuse or do anything to stop it. This is the reason most abused women stay in those relationships and blame themselves for the abuse.

And in the case of millions of actors and actresses not coming forward about being sexual harassed, or raped, until years later, the reason highlights itself. They were afraid of being blackballed in Hollywood.  How much further will this topic go? Will we just forget about sexual abuse, sexual harassment,  and sexism when this Weinstein story blows over? Because that is usually what happens. We never “fix” problems, or come up with solutions. All we do is talk things to death and then move on.

Same could be said about the NFL now. They are worst hypocrites. They make all their players wear pink for “Breast Cancer Awareness” and then they allow players to get second chance after second chance when they commit a crime against a woman.  They are afraid to lay down rules as we see with the National Anthem, as we are witnessing. Can you imagine the powerhouse the NFL could really be if they had strict rules that were enforced, educated the players on domestic violence, and then turned around and educated the public?  Can you imagine what true role models those in Hollywood would be in they stood up against sexual crimes, in spite of their own careers?

We can all help eliminate domestic violence and sexual crimes. Can we stop it? Probably not 100% but we can educate others after we educate ourselves first.  We should do this because every child, woman and man deserves that, no questions asked.

.

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Just The Dirt: My Story

I am an author, blogger and private consultant in Digital Marketing and Social Media Marketing. She is the Founder and CEO of Sassy Productions, Inc. a Rockland County Online Social Media, Book writing/publishing and Blogging agency, since 2006. My book, “Hello Love, Where’s Cupid? 2nd Edition was a nominee for Book of the Year, for Writer’s Digest and for The Library Association of Rockland. The book discusses online dating ( the first social media sites) and the downfalls social media has brought to relationships.

I have over 8 years client Digital Marketing and Blogging experience in helping corporations such as JcPenney, American Idol, and AT&T, and countless others use the web to drive online visibility and generate leads that have resulted in new business online. I manage the Social Media Repuation and Digital Marketing Strategy for top clientele of Rockland County businesses. I also have blogged for numerous webistes. I am part of SheKnows Media and part of BNI.

As a Digital Marketing Expert, I have developed and delivered workshops  in the areas of Social Media Marketing through use of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram , Pinterest, and Youtube. I also have given bloggers tips of the trade and has worked with bloggers overseas.

With that inside information as to who I am, I am running a Kickstarter to get backers and supportive pledges to back my brand so I can expand it.

In 2008, my brand, which was named back then, SassygirlPR, was formed. I worked on developing it and molding it for the past nine years.

Today my brand is called, Sassy Productions Inc., and it has expanded and has grown 500%. That’s due to my hard work, perseverance, determination and my ability to grasp creative ideas to turn them into actual products.

This project is a two-fold and it’s one of my best ones to date. To develop a talk show/podcast, where I can take my blogging to a higher level, and also use it to promote other businesses, besides mine, is the ultimate challenge. The second part, besides being able to not only produce another book and be able to have a book tour with the book, tie it in the show, is as awesome as it can get.

To use the rewards I have listed here as a demo as to how my brand can expand is also an additional bonus.

By having you support this project, you support my brand. By you supporting my brand, you help me expand it and have a dream fulfilled. How can it get better than that?

You are the bread and butter of my brand, and that from my very core, I thank you.

You can check out the kickstarter and pledge here: Just The Dirt

 

 

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The Only Period I Talk About Online Is A Punctuation Mark

According to PlanInternational UK on Twitter, they think it’s time we had a #PeriodEmoji. Um, what? My answer to this simply this: Of all that is holy, no! Hell no! Saying in a tweet that we don’t talk about periods enough…. blah, blah, blah. Um, has it ever occurred to people that not everything needs to be on social media? Has it ever occurred to PlanInternationalUK, that as a woman, we talk about periods enough and we talk about them in private with our closest friends? Has it ever occurred to people that don’t need #emojis for everything we do in life?

Yes, having your period is normal if you are a woman. But what one woman said to me in response to this crazy post was that it’s about “reproduction.” My answer to that is no, it’s not. Not every woman can reproduce. The fact that a woman is menstruating doesn’t necessarily mean that she can conceive and carry a baby to term. Some women continue to have periods but don’t ovulate at all. This medical condition is known as anovulation. You’re born with a fixed number of eggs but the number and health of your eggs declines as you get older. Infertility affects approximately 6.7 million women in the United States. Maybe that is something we should be talking about. Maybe we should be talking about adoption and making the process a lot easier than it is for those women who wish to be moms. But to adopt these days, you need to be a celebrity and have an abundance of money. There are probably a lot of children who don’t have a home that would have one if it wasn’t for this ridiculously insane high cost. But I will say that it is possible to find ways to arrange a private newborn adoption for $6,000 to $8,000; and not the $30,000 price tag of some adoptions. A lot of the price depends on two major factors, the lawyer fees and if the adoptive family is helping pay for medical expenses. And as I am in the process of writing my book, “The Road To Adoption,” there are many hurdles for couples and single moms/dads, especially if you try to adopt using the foster care system.

Again, as a social media expert I am telling everyone out there that not everything we do in life or experience in life needs to be on social media. It’s called social media for us to be social, it’s not a place where we should, let alone, need to share private things that happen in our lives. And seeing how some people are using personal Facebook pages as a business tool, which is a no-no for so many reasons, you will eventually kill your own brand by oversharing information with the public.

It’s normal to have our periods but tell me why on Earth we need to let everyone online know it? That’s ridiculous! What’s next? Are we going to have emjolis to let everyone know we are having wet dreams, having sex, or that we have sexual diseases?

Enough is enough. The topics we should be discussing we ignore and the things we don’t need to discuss we do. The social media generation needs to learn how to distinguish between what should be public and what should be private. Remember, once you push the send button that’s all it takes for your posts to stay online forever. Be wary and careful as to what you put online- it can bite you later on.

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Why A Day Without A Woman Is A Joke

The first official National Woman’s Day, held in New York City was on February 28, 1909. (The organizers, members of the Socialist Party of America, wanted it to be on a Sunday so that working women could participate.) Thousands of people showed up to various events uniting the suffragist and socialist causes, whose goals had often been at odds. Women were demanding voting rights, better pay and shorter working hours. Labor organizer Leonora O’Reilly and others addressed the crowd at the main meeting in the Murray Hill Lyceum, at 34th Street and Third Avenue. In Brooklyn, writer Charlotte Perkins Gilman (of “The Yellow Wall-paper” fame) told the congregation of the Parkside Church: “It is true that a woman’s duty is centered in her home and motherhood…[but] home should mean the whole country, and not be confined to three or four rooms or a city or a state.”

On March 19, 1911 (the 40th anniversary of the Paris Commune, a radical socialist government that briefly ruled France in 1871), the first International Woman’s Day was held, drawing more than 1 million people to rallies worldwide. With the outbreak of World War I in 1914, most attempts at social reform ground to a halt, but women continued to march and demonstrate on International Woman’s Day.

Most dramatically, a massive demonstration led by Russian feminist Alexandra Kollontai that began on February 23, 1917 (according to Russia’s Gregorian calendar; it was March 8 in the West) proved to be a link in the chain of events that led to the abdication of Czar Nicholas II and the Russian Revolution. After the czar’s abdication, the provisional government formed until a constituent assembly could be elected became the first government of a major power to grant women the right to vote.

In 1975, recognized as International Women’s Year, the United Nations General Assembly began celebrating March 8th as International Women’s Day.

(Courtesy of The History Channel)

In 2017, the official theme for International Women’s Day is #BeBoldforChange, a campaign that calls on its supporters “to help forge a better working world—a more gender inclusive world.”

the organizers of the Woman’s March and the planned International Women’s Strike are asking women to go even further: take the day off from paid and unpaid labor, refrain from shopping and wear red in solidarity.

Just once I would like to see the women in the United States of America march/protest for the women in countries where the women don’t have any rights, let alone, don’t have the same freedoms that they do. But they won’t. I can guarantee that some of these liberal women will be marching/protesting against Trump like the sheep that they are.

“A day without a woman” sounds silly to me. Yes, women do a lot to make the world go around. Hell, we are the ones who carry the children and give birth. Some women are the bread and butter of their families. And some women are single moms and do it all. How come we can’t just celebrate womanhood? Can women actually march/protest seriously? What do I mean by seriously? I mean, can women actually march/protest without wearing pussy hats or V-jay hats, ( what ever you wish to call them), costumes of private parts, carry signs that are pointless and screaming vulgar things?

Ironically, women want to be taken seriously but then look like children having a tantrum doing marches/protests as this. None of this marching and protesting is helping to do anything but further divide an already seriously divided country. (And these women are blind to this since they think this stuff actually helps)

What ever happened to actually being proactive? Now we march, protest and look like fools for everything. International Women’s Day has now lost it’s value. How about having luncheons, ladies night out, donating to women charities, or helping out women-based businesses? You want to be proactive, I just gave you four suggestions.

You want equal pay? Taking a day off doesn’t help your case, actually it hurts it. And remember, a paycheck doesn’t show appreciation, which is what we should be celebrating today; appreciation for women. Yes, equal pay is important, but once again, women are going about that the wrong way.

I’m proud to be a woman and I don’t need a pussy hat, wear red, hold a protest sign, shout obscenities or some stupid chant that all the sheep are screaming to be a proud woman. I look back and see just how far we have come and I am proud of that. I instead decide to out work ’em, out read ’em, out last’em, Show up. Something today’s woman could and should take note. When you focus on problems, you will have more problems. When you focus on possibilities, you will have more opportunities. Life is all about – Choices. Options. Opportunities. And today’s woman in the USA can make many of her own choices, has many different options presented to her and is given many opportunities to shine.

So to all the women who feel that they are oppressed because of our government, name me one of your rights that was taken away, that you no longer have since January 19th. Don’t worry, I’ll wait, while you try to come up with one.

 

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Don’t trade respect for attention

waiting

If you watch my Periscope video casts, you know how much I enjoy reading dating groups on Facebook. Today, I posted the above on a the dating groups and then sadly the desperate and  pathetic “girls” ( not women) showed themselves and posted the following comments under the picture:

“Yes I have naked pics for you at my Facebook profile.”

“I am looking for a date for the weekend. Check out my profile and drop me a message, if you like what you see.”

“Sent me a friend request and you can see my naked pics.
Who wants to chat with me?”

“I´m hot and Single *smile*. Please sent me a friend request, if you are single.”

Why are women today acting like complete and utter dumb asses on these dating groups? They trade respect for attention.  But sadly the only attention they are going to gain are those guys who are losers, guys who could be sexual predators, and guys who won’t, under any circumstances respect them.

This is what people don’t get, still to this day.  Respect given to you is a reflection on how you respect yourself. If you don’t respect yourself, others will walk all over you. People will treat you however you let them.  By all means, I want women to value themselves, their voice, body and their dreams. But that doesn’t mean parading around wearing a “pussyhat” screaming vulgar things either- that only lowers people’s respect for you. If you are demanding respect, you need to remember that it is better to be respected than to be popular. It’s always better to stand out, not to be a sheep in the crowd “just because.”

The moment you settle for less than you deserve is the moment you get even less than what you settled for. Too bad most people who use that dating group on Facebook seem to forget the following: Never spend your life seeking to be accepted.  Instead seek inside yourself and learn to accept who you are. If you have to gain a guy’s attention by saying that you have “naked pics” all you are inviting is trouble and heartbreak. Insecurity breeds insecurity.