2025: Unrealistic Body Image Finally Enters The Chat

We live in a culture that praises weight loss. The message we’re sending is that you only look good because you lost weight.
Fat phobia- because of our intent, we perpetuate diet culture, and fat phobia when we compliment someone on their smaller body. Our society praises weight loss as if it’s the best thing a person could ever do. Not only that, but we comment on people’s bodies without having any idea what is going on in their lives.

Last week Jennifer Love Hewitt made more women in their 40s so happy that someone in Hollywood actually looks like them. She didn’t run off to use ozempic and she didn’t go ahead and do a crazy-ass diet. She is what women are SUPPOSED to look like and she was so proud of her body!

We “assume” that their weight loss is “positive”, when it could be due to a chronic illness or an eating disorder. All unsolicited comments about someone’s body are bad and shouldn’t be praised because no one asked for them. Even if someone asks, we shouldn’t even give them one when actually we should take it a step further and tell people that they don’t want to receive those comments.

We should be telling people to focus on who that person is not by what that person looks like. If only people did this on social media.

Social media is the perfect environment, unfortunately, where the diet culture flourishes. It thrives on comments from men who think they know that certain bodies are “better and hotter” than others. Yes, guys who are losing their hair, have beer bellies, droopy chests and butts, are telling women that they all need to look like a goddamn Barbie doll, when they themselves are so far away from representing Ken.

Women who already have suffered from a body image disorder, get triggered by those comments and now are drawn back into the diet culture. And for what? To please all the men who you don’t know on social media, who basically have their own insecurities about their own looks and projected on women?

The sad reality is, if you look on social media and even dating apps, all men want this fantasy woman who is 5 feet tall 5 inches, 130 pounds, size 2, blonde hair, and blue eyes, who accepts bare minimum, and who could pass for either a Victoria’s Secret model or a Barbie doll. What they don’t realize is that a woman’s looks is never going to raise their children. Her mindset will.

Men never focus on who a woman really is, speaking in terms of her personality, mentality, and character. But they only focus on how hot she looks so his teammates, and friends can be extremely jealous of his arm candy.

Oh, once you hit 35 and you’re a woman you’re old and decrepit according to social media.

If only men could stop being, “so full of themselves,” and stop trying to “fit in” focusing on loving a woman for who they truly are. But instead, they don’t want to embrace that main character energy. They wanna focus on what isn’t instead of what is.

I guess the question really is this : do we really want to spend our lives agonizing over trying to make others happy instead of making each day we live the best days we’ve ever had? When are we going to realize that nobody at your funeral is going to say the following: “ I remember so-and-so, she was a size 4 all her life, she was always so skinny, she was always looking hot and beautiful, etc”

They are going to remember how you made others feel, how you lived life and the kindness you showed others . That’s a life worth remembering.

Big Boy Season In Full Effect

These guys have had it going on all season long, but the one pet peeve, the no-no in fashion is the fact that they are wearing dress shoes without socks… and they don’t look like they are wearing no-show socks either.
You should not wear dress shoes without socks- here are the reasons:

1) Your feet contain more sweat glands than any other part of your body, causing your feet to produce a great deal of sweat. When wearing no socks with dress shoes, this moisture will accumulate and cause your dress shoes to become a breeding ground for bacteria. Warm, damp, and dark environments like this allow for the growth of bacteria that causes fungal infections such as athlete’s foot. Wearing a quality pair of socks with dress shoes will allow your feet to stay comfortable, dry and healthy.

2) The development of bacteria in your dress shoes will also cause them to smell. This stench is unpleasant and extremely hard to remove from your shoes once it has developed.

3) Without wearing socks, excessive moisture in your dress shoes will cause the leather to prematurely wear. Given that your dress shoes are likely the most expensive shoes in your closet, be sure to always wear socks with them. Or try the no-show sock look.

Abortion and the right to it.

So, unless you are under a rock, today the US Supreme Court overturned Roe vs Wade, which in my opinion, they messed up way back in 1973.

First off, it NEVER was a constitutional right.

I don’t know what school some of you went to, but in history class or social studies as we called it, abortion was never part of the constitution. It’s not part of the 14th amendment it’s not part of the first/ second amendment it is not part of the constitution at all. Second of all row vs wade should’ve been thrown out, as each state makes its own rules and laws. Some state laws that differ from state to state gun control laws, custody laws, divorce laws, motor vehicle laws, business laws, but each are run separately.

Each state in the United States has a legislator as part of its form of government and most of the fundamental details of the legislator are specific in the state Constitution. State legislators are like miniature congresses no two are exactly alike. You have state legislators ,you have state assemblies, each state writes their own bills ,has their own budgets, etc. Obviously then we have the federal laws which all states are to abide by, but abortion should not be one of them.

Now of course what I’m going to say is going to trigger some of you, but I’m going to say it anyway. Abortion is not birth control! Let me say it again for those in the back, abortion is not birth control! Abortion is only needed for three reasons 1) incest 2) rape and 3) the mother‘s life is in danger and the only way to save her is to unfortunately abort the baby. It is not birth control where are you can have sex with as many partners as you want, get pregnant and have an abortion. If you would like to do that, then that’s what condoms are for, that’s what birth control is for. And speaking of condoms, everyone should be using them when you are having sex with multiple partners. There are things out there in the world called STDs, AIDS, being one of them and we stop the spread of those by having safe sex! So please, if you’re going to have sex use common sense.

Also for the men out there abortion is not so you don’t then have to pay child support for you being irresponsible by having sex without a condom.
I will also add that is why folks then put babies up for adoption. There are MANY couples and WOMEN who want children, but or some reason can not have them. Adoption is the ONLY way for some to go.

Remember every US state is also SOVEREIGN entity in its own right and it’s granted the power to create laws and regulate them according to their needs. Therefore abortion should be one of them whether you like it or not. 

A new year brings hope

See how you can experience joy and gratitude in the coming year. In times of crisis it is hard to be hopeful.. But it’s not impossible—and may be the key to mentally surviving a crisis like this. Despite the burdens of the recent past you can look to the future with the likelihood of positive change. You can turn turmoil and crisis into opportunity.

Discover your primary inner strength that will bring you through the problems that life gives you?

This is a 30 day New Year New You campaign which is all about empowering ourselves to overcome the challenges of 2020 and starting fresh in 2021.

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Words Matter: Be Ashamed If You Body Shame Others Online

Yesterday was my cousin’s wedding ceremony.  Due to Covid19, the wedding has been postponed twice, so they decided to have a legal ceremony on the day that they had their first date.  That’s not what this post is about, but it’s the partly the reason I am writing it.  Yesterday I wore this little black dress that I recently bought.  It was a dress that was not loose fitting, but a little snug in the midsection.  Every time I ever need to dress up to go to a function, I spend hours in the mirror criticizing myself about how I “think” people are going to perceive me. ( Of course I am wrong, but my brain doesn’t think so at the time.)  I put this dress on and spun around looking at myself in the mirror, looking to see just how much of midsection was “noticeable.”   I hate to go out and not look “skinny,” in whatever I am wearing.  I say to myself that If I don’t feel comfortable that I will have a lousy time.

Yesterday was very different.

I usually end up talking myself out of wearing something and put on something else, but yesterday I didn’t. I kept that little black dress on and went to the wedding and enjoyed myself.  Now, I am not fat. I am not obese. I am not heavy or big-boned. I am of a normal weight for a short girl.  I don’t wear a size 0 or size 4 or even a size 6.  Depending on the brand, I am any where from a size 8 to a size 12.  Seriously, the way that clothes are made today is unreal.  I should be the same size no matter what brand I buy, but I am not.

This got me thinking yesterday of all the body shaming going down on social media lately. I see young girls on TikTok posting videos of,  “How to get skinny.”   I see young women posting videos of them telling others that they have to get back to being skinny and so forth.  I also see guys, body shaming women.  Some of the comments are so over the top nasty.

1) ” I don’t know what you are doing but you look so much better now! Look at all the weight you lost!”

2) “If you lose weight someone will love you.”

3) “Look at that fat body. What a waste of a pretty face.”

4) “You don’t have the right body to be doing that.”

5) “Why are you posting a picture of you in a bikini when you are no where near being a bikini model!”

6) Now that Pat Mahomes got his big contract he can now dump that disgusting girlfriend.”  ( yesterday, he got the biggest contract in NFL history)

Now body shaming isn’t just about saying rude and obnoxious things, but it’s also when a guy ONLY pays a woman a compliment on HOW she looks.  ( Beautiful, gorgeous, hot, sizzling, etc,”  Why can’t guys ever just compliment  a girl/woman without using her looks as part of the compliment?

Now we all can do one day with a bad hair day, or wish that parts of our bodies were different, but sometimes it is overwhelming which stops us from doing all kinds of things.  We start to develop anxiety about our bodies. We start to question why someone would even want to love us or even be with us in a romantic situation.

This is why body shaming has to stop.

We then become ashamed of our muffin tops, love handles, or flat bums. We then pick apart other parts of our body like our noses, thighs, arms,  and legs. And for what? To be accepted by a bunch of immature, self-conceited , superficial guys who don’t look like the Ken doll that they should be as they want to be with ever girl that resembles Barbie!

Give me a break!

Looks don’t make the man or the woman.  What should matter most is the person they are on inside; their personality.  Would you rather be with someone so vain or be with someone who was caring, compassionate, funny, and who supported your vision for the future?

Looks fade, who that person is from the inside out stays forever.

The next time you see someone body shaming someone else on social media tell them this; ““I do not give a &$#! about what men think about my body. I don’t care about what women think about my body. My body is not for other people, and the only person whose opinion matters about how I look is mine.

 

Corona Virus 101: What The Media Isn’t Telling You

( ALL RESEARCHED!!)

Human coronavirus is a common, enveloped, positive-sense RNA virus, with most people contracting it during their lifetime. Coronaviruses cause mild to moderate upper-respiratory tract illnesses. There are six currently known strains of coronaviruses that infect humans. The most common infection globally is from human coronaviruses 229E, NL63, OC43, and HKU1. The much publicized human coronavirus, SARS-CoV, which causes severe acute respiratory syndrome, or SARS, has a unique pathogenesis because it causes both upper and lower respiratory tract infections and can also cause gastroenteritis. The six human coronaviruses are: alpha coronaviruses 229E and NL63, and beta coronaviruses OC43, HKU1, SARS-CoV (SARS), and MERS-CoV (the coronavirus that causes Middle East Respiratory Syndrome or MERS).

Human coronaviruses were first identified in the mid-1960s. The seven coronaviruses that can infect people are:

229E (alpha coronavirus)
NL63 (alpha coronavirus)
OC43 (beta coronavirus)
HKU1 (beta coronavirus)

MERS-CoV (the beta coronavirus that causes Middle East Respiratory Syndrome, or MERS)
SARS-CoV (the beta coronavirus that causes severe acute respiratory syndrome, or SARS)
SARS-CoV-2 (the novel coronavirus that causes coronavirus disease 2019, or COVID-19)

People around the world commonly get infected with human coronaviruses 229E, NL63, OC43, and HKU1.

Sometimes coronaviruses that infect animals can evolve and make people sick and become a new human coronavirus. Three recent examples of this are 2019-nCoV, SARS-CoV, and MERS-CoV.

Coronaviruses are a large group of viruses that cause diseases in animals and humans. They often circulate among camels, cats, and bats, and can sometimes evolve and infect people.

In animals, coronaviruses can cause diarrhea in cows and pigs, and upper respiratory disease in chickens. In humans, the viruses can cause mild respiratory infections, like the common cold, but can lead to serious illnesses, like pneumonia.

Middle East Respiratory Syndrome (MERS) was first reported in 2012 in Saudi Arabia and spread to more than 25 other countries. MERS originated in camels and emerged to infect people. Symptoms usually include fever, cough, and shortness of breath, and often progress to pneumonia. About 3 or 4 out of every 10 patients reported with MERS have died. MERS cases continue to occur, primarily in the Arabian Peninsula; however, as of 2019, there have been only two confirmed cases of MERS in the US, both in 2014.

Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) originated in small mammal and emerged to infect people. SARS was first reported in Southern China in 2002 and the illness spread to more than two dozen countries in North America, South America, Europe, and Asia. Symptoms include fever, chills, and body aches, and may progress to pneumonia. Infection with the SARS virus causes acute respiratory distress (severe breathing difficulty), with a mortality rate of about 10 percent. No human cases of SARS have been reported anywhere in the world since 2004.

Both seasonal flu viruses (which include influenza A and influenza B viruses) and COVID-19 are contagious viruses that cause respiratory illness. Typical flu symptoms include fever, cough, sore throat, muscle aches, headaches, runny or stuffy nose, fatigue and, sometimes, vomiting and diarrhea, according to the CDC. Flu symptoms often come on suddenly. Most people who get the flu will recover in less than two weeks. But in some people, the flu causes complications, including pneumonia.
In general, studies of hospitalized patients have found that about 83% to 98% of patients develop a fever, 76% to 82% develop a dry cough and 11% to 44% develop fatigue or muscle aches, according to a review study on COVID-19 published Feb. 28 in the journal JAMA. Other symptoms, including headache, sore throat, abdominal pain, and diarrhea, have been reported, but are less common. Critical cases are those who have underlying health conditions. #Flu #Corona

So  now doctor’s offices are asking parents not to bring in their sick kid into the doctor’s office. I get it IF they traveled to the affected areas BUT if a kid has a cough and fever but didn’t travel, then the doctor will see them in the office? What about before this coronavirus – they saw kids with coughs and fevers- and they never got this upset over it before!
This virus isn’t new- Corona has many other strains- the flu kills more and that sadly includes kids. They had patients in waiting rooms with the flu!

This whole thing is blown out of proportion 🤦‍♀️ ( BTW: over 500,000 in Europe and Asia)  are now better from the virus. You just don’t hear that from the media at all!

Now the NHL, MLB, NBA are not granting beat writers locker room access.  Heaven Forbid you want to high five or fist bump a player- oh no, you can’t now because of the damn corona! But you can take a picture with them and sit or stand really, really, close to them instead! #Sarcasm

They are thinking of having games with fans.   People are not taking trips, don’t want to be at events or even BNI, because This entire thing is out of proportion and by everyone doing these things – adds to the PANIC that is it causing. This IS NOT using common sense. Especially since the death toll in the States is only at 26. The Death toll to date on the flu in the US: 14,000 and that included 100 kids.

The chance of catching Corona is almost zero. Whereas you have a 5% to 20% of catching the flu.  Stop posting places to buy toilet paper, wipes, sanitizer, disinfectant spray, hand soap, etc.  Stop adding to the freaking panic!
Wash your hands.
Wipe down devices.
Wipe down doorknobs.
Cough and Sneeze in your elbow.
Throw out used tissues.
Stay home if you are sick.
All these things that you can to do by using common sense. That’s what we should be preaching- not preaching panic!