My hot mess Summer began June 23rd… but officially started July 1st. Yesterday I got the keycard to my office space for my company in NYC on 5th freaking avenue!!
So..What’s a hot mess summer you ask?
Well, it’s me being my real self, no photoshop, going out and living my best summer’s life! Usually you see girls talk about a hot girl summer, but I say fuck that shit! Seriously, we should love who we are and not try to be this fake person just to be accepted by society. All the girls who have hot girl summers do the same shit: generally characterized by an emphasis on promiscuity, immodesty, and partying. Having a “hot girl summer” means not being tied down by a boyfriend, dressing “hot”, and living wild. I hate to burst everyone’s bubble on that, but having a hot mess summer is all about being confident, having fun and not caring what others think. It’s going out there and living your best life.
June 23rd it started at LBI … my family has a house there and I spent some time relaxing and spending time with my parents, brother, sister in law, niece and nephew. We had a good time. We went to the arcade and I actually won a stuffed animal from those claw games! My nephew won his lava lamp while my niece won her pink pillow friend. It was a blast.
July 4th was about my neighborhood and watching these really cool fireworks they let off. Also went shopping , spent time watching Christmas movies ( Christmas in July) and also I do love to read in the summer. I also started painting my seashells. I paint the inside of the shell ( I will have to post a photo on Twitter)
July 7th – Yesterday – I went to NYC to get my keycard for my office space I will be using for a slew of projects. It’s on 5th Ave and it is so freaking awesome! I posted some photos on Twitter, IG and Threads. I have ALWAYS been a city girl ever since I was 14. I worked back in the city in my early 20s and since then I have been in love with NYC. It’s where I belong and I am doing everything that my soul finds joy in. And the best part is the office building has summer networking events and stuff, so I get to meet new people which I love to do!
I have started asking Jacob Trouba, Ryan Lindgren and Vincent Trocheck from the NY Rangers to do a FUN segment with me for yes my podcast and this blog called Coffee With The Captain and Teammates… but of course, it’s going to be a cruel summer with them. Oh, I also asked Jack Hughes, Dawson Mercer and Nico Hischier of the NJ Devils too, ( the 3 cutest on the NJD- the guys on the NYR are hot but a competition is always good. And oh, yeah, I got options.)
I am a cheerleader, cheerleading coach/choreographer so like duh.. this segment is going to be the most gimme a F-U-N these guys will EVER have.. that is a guarantee. Heck, if they want I will bring my poms and do a cheer for them. If these dudes want to break Twitter and IG… they will if they are smart enough to say yes to me.
I also started writing the follow up to my book, “The Diary of a Drama Queen” where one of my old haters decided to leave me a bad review on my book. Seriously, I get a kick out that. I have a couple of those that seem to “follow” my every move. If you can believe it, from the Twitter War of 2010 -2011 this girl STILL is obsessed with me and tried to follow my youtube channel and IG account. Like my god… SO, yeah I have fans and a haters club. (I say this as sassy as I can… lucky me)
I also am on Cameo… here’s my link if you want to hire me to send a cheer to anyone… or if you need that comeback for your social media troll. CLICK HERE
I introduce the following video for you to 1) Get to know a little bit more of me 2) I have been asking Jacob Trouba, Vincent Trocheck and Ryan Lindgren to do a segment with me called Coffee With The Captain and Teammates… ( I want to add Lexi but he is still a RFA) So I created this video for them to get to know me and be more comfortable to get to know me….
BTW.. You can follow me on Twitter too! The link below is the video I posted there PLUS give me a follow!
These guys have had it going on all season long, but the one pet peeve, the no-no in fashion is the fact that they are wearing dress shoes without socks… and they don’t look like they are wearing no-show socks either. You should not wear dress shoes without socks- here are the reasons:
1) Your feet contain more sweat glands than any other part of your body, causing your feet to produce a great deal of sweat. When wearing no socks with dress shoes, this moisture will accumulate and cause your dress shoes to become a breeding ground for bacteria. Warm, damp, and dark environments like this allow for the growth of bacteria that causes fungal infections such as athlete’s foot. Wearing a quality pair of socks with dress shoes will allow your feet to stay comfortable, dry and healthy.
2) The development of bacteria in your dress shoes will also cause them to smell. This stench is unpleasant and extremely hard to remove from your shoes once it has developed.
3) Without wearing socks, excessive moisture in your dress shoes will cause the leather to prematurely wear. Given that your dress shoes are likely the most expensive shoes in your closet, be sure to always wear socks with them. Or try the no-show sock look.
If you follow this blog religiously ( and seriously, who doesn’t シ) You know that my company does a variety of things, mostly content creation and social media, but we also go back to the main start of my blog about 15 years ago, and talk about dating/relationships and I have written best selling books on the subject.
This year we started to wet our feet once again in the fashion world and also expanding our knowledge in the cheer industry as well as my creating different segments of my podcast.
We dipped our feet into some other areas too, that for the moment didn’t pan out, but that we may get back to at a later time as well.
I sat thinking the past 2 weeks, especially during my birthday week when I was taking some time off for myself and wanted to figure out what it is that I really want my brand to represent. You want to always innovate but you don’t want to do too many things that cause you to lose your identity.
So here’s what you can expect from me from here on out:
1) Fashion on Poshmark ( yes, including panties シ) LINK CLICK HERE
I will be doing more fashion stuff- even men’s fashion using this link. I will tie together my fashion videos with the site as well. And yes, sell some great fashion at reasonable prices including MY OWN DESIGNS!
2) Podcast
Of course my award winning podcast will keep going! I have changed it up significantly since I started back in 2017. But I will now add EXCLUSIVE CONTENT that you will have to pay for. The price will be $2.99 a month and I will have exclusive contests that I then will use Twitter to find the winner. I also will use the exclusive content as a way to continue conversations from the podcast itself, have guests, and maybe even thrown in a little more racy stuff… ★♫
Follow the podcast here —> CLICK Follow my twitter feed —> CLICK
3) Books
I have written some great books which I take so much pride in simply because writing a book is much more than “just writing” it. It’s the cover art, editing, getting an audience excited about it way before it’s published, etc. Yes, I have written 2 dating/relationship books which simply show you how I have grown in my opinions as well as give you updated information where dating apps are. BUT .. did you know that I have written some Young Adult novels as well?
“The Diary of A Drama Queen” is a book I am mostly proud of as it took me over 7 years to finish. And now I am back in wanting to provide some more great books that show my creativity so I am starting to write the sequel called, “Drama in the City” which I hope will be released next year. BUT I plan to share with you updates on the progress, how I write, how I go about creating the book, etc through my Youtube Channel ( besides posting some fun other content too!)
If you don’t know, I have been in the cheer industry for a long time! I started back in the day when I was 7, with dance, and then when I got older did cheerleading, fell in love with it, and haven’t looked back! So, not only do I choreograph cheer routines, and will be posting A LOT more of them and new cheers that teams can use, but I will be focusing on FITNESS. Cheerleaders need to be physically and mentally fit. So I will be introducing a fitness calendar, 4 monthly new workouts for a reasonable price that not just for cheerleaders but for ANYONE who wants to stay in shape or get in shape. I also will have free workouts too.
Now the above link will also host the following as well… ( I will tie both together as a place to be elite on the mat but also elite with social media.)
5) Content Creation/Courses/Templates
I will post some really awesome photos that you can buy directly from me at a reasonable price and use Anywhere you want too. I will have Templates that you can use as posts for your personal and professional needs and I will be offering 3 courses: a) LinkedIn b) Youtube and c) How to take better selfies and photos – all come with LIVE teaching as well not just recorded video, unless you need a recorded version!
So, stay tuned… A lot of exciting things are happening and I look forward to sharing them with y’all!
These guys know sensuality begets aesthetics – first thing is first. Here’s the latest fashion segment presented by the NY Rangers- kings of Fashion Ave. Here are some observations to take note of:
The tie peering out of the buttoned jacket looks chic
Just wearing a regular T-shirt with a suit jacket looks SO HOT
The Black men’s shirt without a tie and a grey suit is simply sexy.
A cobalt blue suit with a black shirt and black tie – looks INCREDIBLY HOT
The light blue suit with a light purple shirt and dark purple tie is posh and sexy.
The beanie with suit just makes a guy look incredibly rebellious
An open suit jacket shows a guy’s swagger ( I like this look better when it is just a regular suit)
The Pinstriped suit… OH MY GOD!
If you want to stand out, where a different color suit jacket. The color will make the entire outfit stand out.
The Long jacket looks very businesslike
Dating segment of blog
SO if you didn’t listen to my podcast last week, here is it CLICK HERE
I will though finish this conversation this week as it has SPARKED a little controversy with what I said, of course from the men. On Tiktok some guys posted videos of telling us girls that we shouldn’t play games with trying to get you. Hey, I agree that NO ONE should play games when it comes to dating. But here is the kicker: When it’s all you guys fault! You play games and you want a girl to chase you, if you stop playing games then we’ll stop playing them too. It’s pretty much that simple. THEN on Twitter a guy actually told me that WOMEN don’t know what it’s like to be REJECTED! Is this guy serious? Women are rejected EVERY DAMN DAY! We are rejected from making the SAME amount of money a man is doing the SAME job. A woman is rejected from getting a job that is along the lines of CEO type jobs because how can a man work for a woman? A woman is rejected when it comes to relationships as well- she’s too big, too skinny, her boobs aren’t big enough, her booty is too small, she has cellulite, she makes her own money, she doesn’t need a man anyways. Guys tell us they want us to ask them out, that they find that to be a turn on, so when we do; they reject that idea because then she’s being too aggressive, assertive, and looks desperate. See you guys have this stupid vision of what you think the ideal woman should be like and when real, wonderful, down to earth women fall short because of whatever stupid flaw, you reject them. Completely forgetting that EVERYONE comes with their own flaws, no one is perfect, unless they are on Instagram using filters.
So, I have been pretty straightforward about the ONLY guy I want to date. Some guys are upset that literally put this out there. So let me apologize for not wanting to waste my time and energy on a guy that I have simply NO INTEREST in dating. (Insert my sassy/sarcastic face) Why am I going to want to have low-valued experiences, which I have had in the past, when I know I what I want? If you want to know why I want a hockey player… well, watch the video. Ya know, I have said time and time again cheerleaders belong with athletes. We get them. We understand them. And we support them unlike any other girl would ever do! 1) I may not be a supermodel but at least you know I’m showing up to support you and be your personal cheerleader in every single game you play! 2) I may not be the prettiest girl, but at least you never have to explain to be what penalties are and what’s the difference between a foreword and a defenseman. 3) I may not be smart when it comes to math but at least you’ll never have to explain what a PP, offside or icing is. 4) I may not post naked like all those girls do on their IGs, but at least you’ll never have to explain what FOs, SOG, TOI, or PTS means.
And if a guy I want doesn’t want to take the chance of a lifetime for the prize I am, that’s okay. I’m sure that I will find a hockey player that does. Boom Mic Drop.
Cheap products are always in demand. That’s why only those who can afford the Lamborghini get the prize. You would think the hockey players would know the difference between cheap and expensive. But like I have said some just settle for bare minimum and basic girls, when they deserve much more.
I am sure we will continue this conversation on Friday. Oh, and this girl on Tiktok posted this video explaining what 12 inches looks like. OMG. It was so accurate. I will explain to all the men out there on Friday what exactly women want. Trust me, you don’t want to miss the podcast Friday. See you Friday!!
If you listen to my podcast, you have heard me talk about how cheerleaders belong with athletes, and not just any athletes, but hockey players. And let me add, not necessarily a NHL player, but ANY player ( EHL, AHL, OHL, KHL, etc) This guy on Tiktok helped me out tremendously by putting these together. A shout out to nackarockers for taking the words right out of my mouth. Just in case there was any doubt!
I will have A LOT of to say on Friday on the podcast. A LOT to say. As I think about this…
I smirk. I smile. I laugh literally out loud. The entire thing is crazy to me.
Question: why do people prefer people to be fake, secretive, and almost cunning, instead of being open and not afraid to be vulnerable? Why is it when you don’t have any outside motives that people still think you do? And so forth.
To Be Continued…. Oh, plus more on the Metro Division, playoffs, Cap/Escrow, CBA, the NY Rangers of course, and some other stuff… ( Fashion takes and question to guys on facial hair, spitting, and smelling salts, and crazy things I need to know!)
As always you get the sassy, sarcastic, up front version with no filter Friday. Yipee.
For the last 3 months or so, guys have been brave and sliding into my DMs … but of course… either looking desperate, trying pick up lines, or showing their jealously as to the “age range” that I have made clear as to whom I will date. The video below pretty much speaks for itself… then let me continue…
I had no idea that so many guys over the age of 35 would be attacking me over my choice to date younger guys… and oh, hockey players. When I mentioned this it’s like all these guys older than 35 came out of the wood-works and had to ask me directly … and then some of them even were brave enough to shot their shot ( that I will give credit too!) Now, I don’t have to validate my reasons for what I want and I don’t have to ask permission either. But what I will do is spell it out as clearly as I can. 1) Yes, I date guys who are 23-32 BUT I have dated guys that are 21 and 22… there are always exceptions to what I feel I want to do but with that said, don’t get your hopes up if you’re older than 35…(or 34) that rule of mine is staying put.
2) Cheerleaders belong with athletes. Period. We go together like peanut butter and jelly, cookies and milk, bread and butter… hello?! Yes, I know all about the stereotypical ideas put out there into the world about cheerleaders: ( They are dumb, they sleep around, they lack talent, blah blah blah) so trust me when folks hear that I used to be one and still in the industry men think they can easily “land me” but that’s not true at all. If anything, I am hard to “land” since I have high standards and will not go against those. I will gladly give an athlete a chance, but if he only thinks I deserve bare minimum, he’s got another thing coming! Yes, I don’t need to be nor want to be their 1st priority. Their 1st priority should be to their career/ team, but seriously there needs to be a BALANCE . So trust me right now when I say, that if I like you, take that seriously as a compliment. I don’t need anyone to complete me, I WANT someone in my life to grow and build with… that’s the difference.
When guys say to me in DMs that the “only” reason I want to be a hockey player is because of how they “look physically” I giggle and roll my eyes. I don’t give a shit about a man’s hairline, if he has 6-pack abs, buns of steel, muscles, etc. .. that to me is a bonus, not a reason to want to date anyone. The mindset, attitude , character and personality of a hockey player is the main reason why I am attracted to them. Being that I am an ex-athlete and a current coach, I have the exact same mindset as they do… plus I understand the demands of their job, support them 125% and am as loyal as fuck (I have people who back me up on that BTW)
I have you all know that I ALWAYS NEVER dated: doctors, male nurses, lawyers, cops, firefighters, or guys in the military. Why? Well, doctors/nurses/lawyers hours are NUTS. They are NEVER around when you need them. Their jobs are demanding and oh, forget about kids… if I had kids with a guy who did one of those things for a living I would NEVER see him- neither would the kid. Vice Versa if a guy marries a female who does those things… a nanny mostly would be raising those kids! As for Cops, Firefighters and military dudes…their jobs are just way too dangerous and I would be a wreck worrying about them – that is not something I want to do.
Now, going back to the hockey player point being, as too what I am talking about in regards to personality, attitude and character; look at this story on a hockey player and what he did for a fan: Click here to read the story But to phrase this tweet: A couple weeks ago after a Columbus Blue Jackets victory, a guy witnessed a young girl bawling her eyes out while talking to a mutual friend in the concourse. He asked her what was wrong. She explained she was near glass waiting to get Korpi’s autographed stick. After he was announced as the first star, Korpi took a victory lap and pointed right at her, tossed the souvenir stick up over the glass. It landed in this little girl’s hands for a split second until someone behind her snatched it from her grip. She was inconsolable…. you can guess what the rest of the story is, right? This hockey player made it right. You hardly see that with other athletes unless it’s being recorded for their social media to show that “they care” This was NOT recorded. This happened and a guy told everyone on Twitter what an awesome dude Korpi was!
3) As asked in my DMs: “So, you’re just going to say no to other dudes who aren’t hockey players? Aren’t your standards to high?” My answer in a tweet: “You’re standards are too high” Well those standards protect me from low quality experiences. So I’m not afraid to say no! See, I know what I bring to the table. I am the prize. I am a rare breed. This is just another reason why folks should get off those dating apps… if you see what options are left, then you would understand NOT to settle just to settle. And remember what I have said previously, men marry the woman in front of them not necessarily the woman they are meant to be with because they settled when they should have said no. Here is that blog post
4) It’s always the most laid-back women made out to look complicated and crazy by a men who didn’t even try providing her with the basics of what she deserves. See, I don’t settle for bare minimum and NO ONE should settle for that- ever! I ALWAYS tell folks that if you think I am too much, go find less. ( BTW that is what you will find on a dating app) Date someone who’s interested in you. And I don’t mean someone who finds you funny & cute. I mean someone who genuinely wants to get to know you. Find the person who wants to get to know every aspect of who you are because that is a keeper.
5) “So, you only want to then date guys from your favorite team, right?” Another fabulous DM I received the other day! And to answer it: Well, maybe. The guys who shoot their shot GET a shot! And who’s to say that guys from other hockey teams are not in my DMs now? Um, hello! I don’t tweet out or post out WHO I am talking too… EVER. That’s a major rule of mine. Trustworthiness is something I take seriously and I don’t screenshot conversations either. Like I said previously, it doesn’t matter how much I like a guy, if he ain’t up to task of at least getting to know me, I don’t chase, I replace.
6) “So, why young guys and not guys that are older?” Simply put: young guys want to grow, they want to build something, they want adventures and they are not afraid to leave their comfort zone as are older guys. Older men LIVE in their comfort zone. Older men try to “tame” me where younger guys enjoy my carefree spirit and the way I carry myself. I never have been with a younger guy (athletes) who cared so much about how smart I was, especially as a blonde, cared about me having my own company, or cared about how spontaneous I am at times. Older guys… ha!
7) Closing, if you follow me on Twitter you know that I love having conversation and my vibe I bring is very magnetic. (Hey, all these years doing cheerleading and dance brought that out in me.) I am ALWAYS open to meeting new people, no matter anyone’s age, and if you’re a guy and know that there is no chance in hell of ever dating me, but you enjoy having conversation on numerous topics, hit me up. I make a great platonic friend in that , I will always have your back. If anyone ever feels that they need someone to listen to them or needs advice, my DMs are always open. I want to be the light for someone who feels that they don’t have that. Life is better when you are caring, compassionate and kind.
And you don’t need to date me in order for me to do that.
Now that the fake holiday called “Valentine’s Day” has come and gone… here’s a little observation on it that is two-fold. 1) From someone who knows dating and 2) From someone who knows social media.
Let’s talk about athletes and social media, once again and add in Valentine’s Day. If you read this blog religiously, and seriously you should be! (#Sarcasm) You know how I have mentioned time and time again about how athletes misuse use IG and social in general; especially when they are married and/or dating. So, if you are new to this blog I will mention it again. (But this is okay to repeat.)
When an athlete is seriously in love with a woman, and I mean seriously, he will POST her NOT just STORY her. He is tagging you in photos or posts because he wants to SHOW you off and is PROUD that you are his woman. He wants people to know that you’re his and he’s yours. There are no other females that he is entertaining nor want to entertain. If he ONLY putting you in a STORY, then he is protecting his options and he wants to LOOK single and not taken. And don’t fall for that, “I’m not big into social media,” or, “I like to keep my life private.” Those lines are just covers to keep his options open.
The thing though that these athletes forget is that if a woman really, really, really wants him, she is already know his entire history in like 6 minutes. So, when you aren’t posting the girl you are with that leaves A LOT of questions.
Throw in Valentine’s day to the mix.
I can’t even BEGIN to tell you just HOW many athletes from the NFL, NHL, NBA and MLB did NOT post up about their significant others. There were some that threw a story together… cool… but it was not posted. So I start to question about their relationships. Some even put their kids into the story as well and then, there were also some girlfriends from a specific NHL team that had a party and they had Miley Cyrus’s song, “Flowers” in the picture. Um, what? Why on Earth are you telling everyone that you can buy your own flowers when aren’t you still taken by an athlete that plays in the NHL? That was very, very strange. Another quick observation was that 1 particular player I guess sent his girl jewelry and a love note and she took a photo of it next to a very strange photo of them in bed. Um… why? So I guess all these girls and athletes want the world to think they are available and that they have options. And speaking of options…
When I really like a guy. I mean, really like him and I tell him that we should go out, give him my number, spoil him, etc and the guy just sits there and is undecided about being with me or not, I hate to break it to him but I’m not required to sit around and wait for him to decide if he is ready to date me, wants to date me or even just wants to be friends. This girl has options. So if another guy comes at me with this tool belt ready to work, don’t be surprised when your position is filled and you lose out on the best thing that could have happened to you. I’ll love on no matter how deep my feelings are for someone. And I may move on with someone you know.. (now, that’s the sassy bitch that I am at times, not all the time. Gotta remember I know how to play the game, and I play it better than most.) And while we are on this subject… why do guys wait until they are ready? I hate to break to ya, but you’re never going to be fully ready and life is so damn short, why the hell wait and watch some other dude with the girl that you really like and who really likes you. That is so stupid!
PODCAST
If I’m gonna be a mess, I might just be a hot mess. I think that is the title of the latest podcast. You can listen HERE – I talk about the above as well as the latest spicy shit going on in the NY Rangers world, Twitter world, Dating world… with a couple juicy details and stories.
FASHION
The NY Rangers ARE Fashion Avenue! They all really can pull off ANY style. Here are some fashion tips for men: 1) Always pick a different color tie to let your suit stand out. The tie almost ALWAYS brings the entire suit together. 2) If you are going to wear one color, Blue is a great color to wear simply because there are many shades of it and you can mix and match your suit, the shirt and tie with different combos. 3) Wearing the Beanie and Suit is just fire! And while we are talking NY Rangers and Fashion can I just note that Jacob Trouba looking so freaking hot with the rough on his face? I mean seriously, he looks incredible! Also Ryan Lindgren is growing his facial hair again- anything that man does it ridiculously awesome! Panarin is even growing facial hair! So I guess there is a “contest” happening over which dude on the team is going to look the best with a little rough on their face. I have also said this: having a little rough on a man’s face, gives him a edge. It is so sexy and it is a complete turn on.
Do that with what you will.
Last podcast I showed a little clip of this… and people asked to see it. So here ya go. Jacob… you have moves!!! And that is compliment coming from a cheer coach/choreographer! I love this!! Seeing this makes Jacob not just seen as a star hockey player, but as a person. Which most seem to forget that he is a person, not a robot playing a sport.
First and Foremost, the new podcast is up and it’s for your ears only.CLICK HERE to listen.
Sorry, folks, no video podcast this week, maybe next week…
Fashion Segment
Now, some words may be centered off… that is because it’s Youtube Shorts. But the point being is that Hockey Boys Got It Going On! #FashionAve though, belongs to the NY Rangers. But the best dressed athlete is a NHL player. IF you haven’t seen the last 4 videos …. Here they are! They also are on my twitter feed.
Dating Segment ( a quickie – pun intended)
You can tell a lot about an athlete and his character, what he values, etc by who he follows on IG. Guys who are superficial, narcissistic and materialistic will ALWAYS follow the girls on IF we are half naked in their profile pics AND they will NEVER post about the girl who they are with ONLY story her so others can slide into their DMS and they can slide into theirs. Also athletes who have private IG accounts I would be worried about- that shows 1) they hide shit 2) they can’t handle the social media trolls. Also if a girl goes out with you for coffee, pizza, shopping at Target, the girl is into you and only cares about spending time with you- she’s not into you for what you can give her- she’s into you for YOU! I talk more about this on the podcast – LINK On top of this post!
If you saw the racy video of the panties on Twitter…. I talk about it in the podcast. (give you guys a creative hint for Valentine’s Day!)
As always I have my fashion brand where you can purchase sweatshirts/T-shirts I created. CLICK This wonderful link to go to that site.
I believe women should always find the classiest way to empower their sexuality – The devilish girl coming out to play… so if you can’t handle it, then don’t click the link. PS: you’ll have to subscribe for the content but I give you a little tease if you will (The video from twitter is here but I put it on youtube for this blog) CLICK THIS
I started writing about dating back in 2008, back when online dating started. I said back then that it was a crazy idea that was going to get folks into trouble, and in 2022, I am still correct. Dating via looking at a dating app is such a superficial and careless way to date. Period. You are trusting some dude on the other end of the app with your heart, your body, your emotions, and your wallet. When more than half the time that dude is either a two timer, rapist, ex-criminal, scam artist, sex offender, or just a plain douche bag looking to hook up. Dating shouldn’t be casual, either. I never quite understood how someone could just “casually” date someone while doing all the things that a couple does while dating. If you don’t have the time to devote to building something meaningful, then there is no point to dating. Period. Dating is more than just having fun in the sheets too. I mean, yes, sex is part of dating as it should be, but if you develop feelings for the other person and they don’t feel the same, you can end up getting hurt. Not to mention that you just wasted precious time with someone who didn’t care about having a relationship with you, they just wanted to have sex with you as in “Friends with benefits” and “casually” hang out with you when they have “time.”
Recently on Twitter some dude reached out to me via DM since he listens to my podcast all the time, and asked me, “What is it really like to date you?” That question is not an easy question to answer, seriously. Sure, I am fun, adventurous, spontaneous, have high energy, and am seriously easy going until you cross me, but how do you really answer that question? So in my sassy and sarcastic way, I answered it this way:
The pros and cons of dating me are ironically my mouth.
There I said it. #sarcasm but really the truth.
I’m not going to be known as a woman who was afraid to open her mouth and speak up against hate, and I know what I bring to the table and I am proud of being that rare breed in today’s society where you need to be a woman who is “submissive and flaky” to get a guy. At the same time, when I mention this, guys automatically think “slutty” and like I have said before, the fact that guys want girls to act this way and girls think they need to act slutty to get noticed by that athlete or by that guy they have their eyes on, is just completely trash. You can be sassy, sweet, seductive and sensual while at the same time being classy. That is the woman a real man will want anyway. Boys wants slutty. I don’t want a boy, I want a man. Period. You want to be treated like the classy bitch you are- not a doormat.
As I talk about trash, I also think about all the porn I have seen on Twitter in the last few months and I have to say it is the most distasteful thing to ever post on a social media site. Porn is a billion dollar industry and still is, but to post that on a social media site where kids are, and where folks go to have a conversation is so uncalled for. Now I am certainly no prude, as I talk about sex and if you read my best seller, “Hello Love Where’s Cupid 2nd Ed” I told readers of the most interesting positions to try. Yes, Back in the day as a full time blogger, I wrote for many online sites that talked about sex and people would message me and ask me for new things to try in the bedroom. I wrote for a site like Cosmo, called Rant Dating, for those who are interested to know. It doesn’t exist anymore but it was fun to work on, especially when I interviewed a condom company and did an “influencer” post for them before we even knew what a social media influencer was!
Also I have mentioned of course how the TV show, “Sex and the City” changed how women viewed sex, as it has always been a touchy subject when it came to the topic. But there are places to put it and places not to. And if that’s what you’re into, great. I have no problem with it. The problem I have is the fact that people are dumb enough to not only post it on Twitter, but then retweet it. Here is the social media tip that some need: When you Retweet something EVERY ONE of YOUR FOLLOWERS get to see that on their feed. This is NOT what your followers want to see. Now, if you want to create a DM group conversation on the porn you love to watch, go for it.
Stephanie 's Corner 