I Remember 9/11

I will always remember where I was on that day and how it impacted everyone’s lives.

I remember working at a school that day and having a co-worker tell me her dad worked in the North Tower and in 50 years he NEVER missed a day of work until that day.
I remember having to comfort a parent who thought his wife was on 1 of those planes. Luckily she wasn’t.
I remember driving home that night and seeing State Troopers parked at every exit on the Thruway.
I remember learning that my neighbor lost his dad that day trying to rescue others. He was a firefighter.
I remember hearing about friends who lost siblings in the buildings.

I also remember how this Country BANNED TOGETHER and NEVER let Politics stand between each other – how we were kind and caring of one another. We need to REMEMBER that because we as a Country have lost sight of what TRULY is important. If you don’t want to do it for yourself and your neighbors do it for the 3,000 lives that were lost that day.

Don’t let hate win but rather let love reign.

💙
♥️

You Can Learn A lot From People Not Your Age ( Hello, Adam Fox)

For all those non-hockey fans, yesterday the NY Rangers named Jacob Trouba their team captain ( the team hasn’t had one in 4+ years) and one of the players on the team, Adam Fox, had an interesting quote:

So that got me thinking: Why are so many people afraid to associate themselves with people OUTSIDE their age bracket? Being that I was a Pre-K teacher since I was 20 and taught for 15 years, my job was simple: to get kids excited about learning. Not only was it to help them grow, but it was to make them understand that everyday they are are going to learn something new about the world, about themselves and about each other. It was the most fun I had, other than coaching cheerleading which I still do.

One thing is certain and it is the thing in the quote by Adam Fox that he misses the boat on: One can learn from anyone, age is only a number of how long you have been on Earth. People should have is an open mind.

I learn from people who are the most open minded and most knowledgeable. I’ve seen older people who act immature and claim they know everything and I’ve seen young people who are calm and willing to give their two cents. I have been around teenagers, college students, guys/girls in their 20s and 30s. I also associate with folks in their 40s and 50s as well. I am full-rounded.

One of my favorite memories is listening to stories from my grandma who lived 99 years and my great-aunt who is still alive at 106 ( she will be 107 in a month) The stories taught me life lessons that I was able to put to use in my life. An example was when my grandma told me to always be the bigger person, arguing with fools make you look like a fool. It’s never worth standing around and arguing if you aren’t going to find a solution to the problem.

If you read my previous blogs, you know that I am a big supporter of younger guys dating older women and older men dating younger women. The reasons were simply:

Older people have a lot of life experience. They can teach you a lot about the reality of life. On the flip side, young folks can teach you what you forget growing up. They are so full of life and ideas. They can’t wait to go out in the world and leave their mark. Its sometimes necessary to not be worried about a single thing and go do what you want to do. Older folks and younger folks can mingle, have adventures together and not have to deal with so much drama as you do when you only are interested in your age category.

I believe that someone has something that I can learn. I never let age, gender or sexuality, be a factor as to whether I should learn from them or not. To do so would be idiocy. Too bad Adam Fox only thinks he can learn from people close to his age or his age. I mean, I understand that sometimes we get comfortable, but you never grow in your comfort zone. It’s only when you embrace the unknown and take a risk that you learn a lot about life and the world you live in. Some risks are always worth taking like love, doing what you are passionate about and standing up for yourself.

Wisdom should always be shared. Every day I learn something in the industry I am in: social media. Some of those in this industry are younger than me, and they learn from me as well. Also, I have coached cheer for a very, very long time, and have learned things from those older than me and younger than me in this industry.

Imagine being a hockey player and only thinking that you are going to learn from those closest to your age? That is ridiculous! You learn from those who played the game before you as well as you learn from those young kids who are just starting out. You learn from coaches who are probably old enough to be the players dads or uncles.

The point is, you learn from people, not from their age. Age does not guarantee knowledge and knowledge can be compounded and complex at any age.

Here are a few other things that people have taught me in life to date:

1- If you worry about how people will judge you, you’ll never achieve anything.

2-There won’t be “plenty of time later” to enjoy life. Life is short and you have NO IDEA how long you have here. Why wait to do what it is that you want to do? Don’t put off your career change, relationship, or any other life desire until you reach some mythical point of readiness; it doesn’t exist.

3- It’s vital to cultivate friendships with people older and younger than you. Younger friends steep you in optimism and possibility, while older friends will ground you in wisdom. You need the perspectives of both.

4- There’s no quicker path to misery than conditional happiness.

If I get that promotion, I will feel happy.
If I buy that luxury car, I will feel content.
If I find a girlfriend/boyfriend, I will feel joy.

If you can’t find happiness during the pursuit, it won’t last long when you reach the finish line. Find joy in the journey- that is what life is- a journey and so far I am having fun on mine.

The Truth About Self-Worth

No matter what our friends say about us, why is it that we can never see ourselves clearly? Why it is so hard to see the good in ourselves?

I think it’s hard for many of us to see the good in ourselves when we are so constantly reminded of what is wrong. We hear that we will never measure up others from our parents, spouses, boyfriends/girlfriends, our bosses and co-workers, on social media and celebrities. But what is worse is when we hear it most from a voice within ourselves. These past two weeks I have spent time doing self-care and focusing on letting go of people, situations, and feelings that no longer serve me for the higher good. It’s awesome to be able to free yourself from the negative so you can focus on all the positive around you and also be able to now allow all the good things to find their way to you.

I find that most tend to look at their faults more than their good qualities. People today have become obsessed with being a perfectionist. SO my suggestion is that you sit down and write down all good things you did in your life that you did, all the things that you are grateful for, you will see all the good in you and all you have to be thankful for. A great self awareness and purposeful driven life can see a good in himself/herself. Sometimes, when we know who we are, what we have , where we are going and our responsibilities–we stand a better chance to clearly appreciate the good in ourselves.
Everyone has SELF-WORTH. EVERYONE has to know that they are VALUED. And Everyone needs to understand that you will NEVER be perfect, so embrace your flaws, focus on the good, and learn to take it one day at a time. Because frankly, that’s all we can do.

Friends, Benefits, Lovers: The Vicious Cycle

Why does it seem that women use sex as a tool/reward/weapon in relationships to get what they want, in order to get their way while men do just the opposite?

(Some) men use love as bait to get sex from women, while (some) women use sex as bait to get love from men. Go figure, right? And they somehow think that this is a “relationship.” Yes, I have heard the term, “Friends with Benefits,” but I can tell you that just because there is a term, it’s not actually what is happening.

Every “friends with benefits” relationship that I have heard about, has always ended on a sour note. Women process sex through emotions while men process it through the physical aspect. Mostly, they go “through the motions” especially when it’s with someone they are not emotionally connected too. This is where that whole game of giving the other person what he/she wants, never ends up turning into what we planned in the first place.

Look at how some women try to get attention these days and the poor saps that fall for it hook, line and sinker.

You have women who dress sexy to get attention and when you point it out they say something stupid like, “I do it because it makes me feel good about myself to look good,” but they are total hypocrites because they only dress that way when they are purposely trying to get a guy’s attention. Yes, confidence is important if you want to succeed in life. And its important to feel good about one self, but it is necessary to dress or limit what you wear just to get attention? They dress in revealing clothing, then get upset when their objective is met…men/women staring at them. Give me a break! And you see all the selfies on social media with women who are HALF-naked and all the men’s comments underneath it… please STOP.

It gets annoying because some of us actually don’t want to be looked at as a sex object. Some of us females wants to be able to dress nice or wear that mini skirt because its the style, we like the designer or we want to wear it just because.

There’s a BIG difference between classy and trashy that most females today forget.

Then there are the men and athletes who are insecure, hungry for attention, want their egos boosted every chance in hell they get, so they use something that is precious to a female, love, to bait them into giving them what they truly want: sex.

Some men actually think that it’s okay if they use a woman to gain whatever it is from them. So they “fake” the relationship up to the point where you give in to their sexual advances and of a sudden that guy is “history.” GUYS: Save your games for family fun nights…..NOT Relationships!

It’s important for me to note that NOT ALL men and women are this way. But you will always have a case of a girl who is an attention-whore and in that case the guy who falls for her crap. Now, I have used the term “gold-digger” before and I will tell you athletes this: If a woman/girl is dressing in a certain way to get your attention and that is how she gets your attention, that is a red flag. A woman who enjoys your company, who makes you a better person, wants you to be successful, and makes you feel like you are on top of the world, and does not expect you to buy her expensive shit; that woman, is not a gold digger and I bet you met her when she was “clothed” – that’s the difference.

I don’t think its right for anyone, male or female, to lure a person into believing that they like them to the point where they feel there are having a relationship, when in reality they are just using them. Relationships take time and they are hard to find in this world. Where as today, so many people treat others like they’re as disposable as diapers.

So how can you tell when a guy or girl is actually interested in you- for you and not just as part of a conquering list? (Remember how in my last blog post, I told you that NFL players think it’s a flex to be with many girls?)

The easiest answer to that question is this; Every once in awhile, someone comes along that makes you realize-it is worth it. The best relationships happen unexpectedly. We never realize the power of a single human being until one comes along and conquers our heart. When you force yourself to fall in love or be with someone you are setting up yourself to fall and to fall short of the relationship you deserve. A “Friends with benefits’ relationship is telling you that you’re good enough to sleep with, but not good enough to invest feelings in. Real love is knowing someone’s weaknesses and not taking advantage of them. A true relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. No secrets and no lies.

Remember, a good relationship is worth the wait.

Relationship Impossible available now as a paperback and ebook on Amazon.

Stay Sassy

This is an unusual blog post of Stephanie’s Sassy Corner…

I’m not going to be giving you advice on dating, on social media or even give you my 2 cents about football, or whatever else I throw into the fire. You see I have spent the past fifteen years becoming a expert in helping you understand how dating apps are only good at creating nightmares in your life, how social media has transformed business and of course you have my view on just about everything sports related ( mostly football)… I wanted to give you something that was different and out of the box. But now I see that as a broadcaster (that is what a content creator/podcaster is on social media) that we shouldn’t always be doing things that are trending but to do things that are valuable and post content that is REAL, RELEVANT and RELATABLE!
I have always been my real, sassy, blunt self on each and every podcast and blog piece that I have written, but now with that said, I am rebranding and refocusing my content so it stands for something that has clarity around my identity, narrative and purpose. Not only will I also stay real, relevant and relatable, but I will do it in a much different way.

I realize that even though I enjoy my podcasts, writing my blogs and social media posts, there was nothing from that they brought me instant joy. From now on, I want to live and enjoy every moment when I do my shows and write my blog posts and even do social media. I don’t want to waste time just doing it for the sake of doing it. So I will still talk about dating, dating apps, social media and of course NFL Football, it will be done in much different way!

Sassy Nation will still be the same day, Tuesdays and it will still be an audio only podcast.
The Sassy Show which is presented my Rockland World Radio which I have done live streamed on Facebook, will be moving to Youtube every other week on a Thursday.
The Recordings of A Fangirl #Sarcasm will now be an online entertainment show WITH video each week on Fridays. I will have some audio after show comments that will be just for subscribers.

And the Playing with the Boys podcast, will be a Twitter Space on Wednesday Afternoons.

I hope you will join me on my platforms and the way I do them change this week.
I no longer will be on Instagram – you can follow me on the following:

Twitter
Tiktok
Pinterest
Nextdoor ( which is the local page only )
LinkedIn
Youtube

Get To Know Me (stop stalking my social media)

Yes, there are “those people” who think they can “get to know” someone by what they post, but that is the wrong idea to have! Mostly people post things to social media that they either LOVE or INTERESTS them. People also post things, at least I know I do, to motivate, inspire, or to be sassy/witty. How could you really know, truly know someone by their posts?

So here are 10 questions and 10 answers for you to “Get To Know” me. HINT: if you really want to get to know me the best way to ASK me!

Question 1: If I had to eat the same foods over and over, what might those be?

Answer: I could literally eat pizza, pasta, peanut butter and French Fries every day if needed.

Question 2: What is the dumbest way you’ve been hurt?

Answer: Luckily for me, it’s the ONLY time I broke a bone. 6th grade on my best friend’s driveway on Valentine’s Day, I slipped on the ice and broke my wrist.

Question 3: Who is your all-time favorite Disney character?

Answer: It’s Cinderella. Classic.

Question 4: What am I afraid of?

Answer: Bees, Spiders, Snakes ( I stepped on 2 of them growing up!) I don’t like the dark but I’m not afraid of it- I rather not be in the dark if that makes sense!

Question 5: Favorite Flower / favorite bug / Favorite color:

Answer: Daisies / Ladybugs / Pink

Question 6: Favorite Vacation Spots

Answer: ANYWHERE there is a Beach and Lake George, NY – I love that town so much! It’s quint, relaxing, and fun. Also there people there are so nice!

Question 7: What talents do you have that nobody knows:

Answer: I played the flute and violin growing up. I also wrote a song that was played on Z100 . Also, I am good at finding missing objects. Anytime any one has something missing, they call me.

Question 8: What did I study in college?

Answer: I started with journalism as I wanted to be a hockey writer or a football writer, but I switched my major to teaching because I fell in love with the kids I was teaching in the summer one year as an assistant and never looked back. So I majored in Education with a minor in English. This was I could always come back to writing later on. Everything does come full circle and I have written over 9 books. And millions of blogs. (either as a ghostwriter, blogger for other sites or my own material.)

Question 9: If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

Answer: Sometimes the best adventures are the ones not planned. I would simply just go on an adventure, whether it was driving some place, shopping, finding a new fun thing to try, ( I have never yet gone to a golf range before) going on a nature walk in a new place, or just spending time with my nephew and niece – those are unplanned adventures for sure!!

Question 10: What are your favorite holidays?

Answer: My Birthday ( yes, it’s a freaking holiday! I celebrate all month long (April BTW) And Christmas! I love baking my Christmas cookies and buying and making gifts for others. It’s my favorite time of the year!

A Look Back At 2020 And A Look Ahead at 2021

2020, may be coming to end, but the challenges we faced this year continue as we go into 2021. Yet in 2020 we saw people around the world come together to help others facing the unknown, as allies and advocates for not only their friends and community members, but for people they may never meet — providing financial support, emotional support or even inspiring others to lend a hand in any way they can. 2020 is the year that forever changed us all. It forced us to slow down, give up things (whether we wanted to or not), but it forced us to grow in ways we might not have grown without Covid.

I used to think that being busy all the time showed people that I was one of the best go get’em and knock them dead entrepreneurs.. That if I wasn’t doing anything productive or knocking off all the items on my to-do lists that I was just a complete failure. 2020 taught me that it’s okay to slow down. It’s okay to take time off from my “busy life” and just live in the moments that I am given.

Another thing that 2020 has taught me is that it’s okay to ask for help. Some people are so afraid to ask for help because then it means that they aren’t the superman or superwoman most thought they were. We all can’t do everything alone, sometimes we need to put our egos aside and reach out.

As someone who loves social media, 2020 has taught us that your mind can’t handle the constant negativity, fighting, and toxicity that you see, and hopefully you learned to really limit your consumption of it all. I did this prior to 2020, but I do this even better because of crazy-ass year we have had.

Finally, instead of worrying about all the things yet to come and all the things I wish we had, this year I found myself learning to be completely content with what surrounded me. Yes, I had the worst birthday, with not being able to go out, and yes, I wanted to have new adventures this year, but what 2020 made me realize is that the most important thing in the world is love and being surrounded by it.

2020 taught me that sometimes you have to risk opening up and putting everything on the table because if you don’t, then you lose the chance of not getting to know people. We’ve all been hurt and we’ve all had heartbreak but if you’re not willing to take a risk then you miss out on the relationships that could be amazing. Life is short. Don’t sit there and ponder, “What if.” No man is an island. Reach out, and it may be the beginning of something beautiful. 

We all faced many challenges this year, but I was blessed to have some amazing people who stood by my side the entire time. They know who they are. All I can say is thank you from the bottom of my heart. And to all those strangers out there on social media that have become some of the best people that I have light conversations with, thank you for becoming a part of life.

Happy New Year!

Bend ( A song)

One of the things I love to write are songs.

I have written many songs – I have been trying to put them on Youtube as best I can.

Here is the latest song that I have placed on Youtube – it’s called Bend. The Lyrics are included on this link for the song. It’s not the best listening quality – but …. it’s good.

LINK <——-

I also will throw out another link for another song I wrote called “Let It Go” Click on the title to be taken to the song.

Song writing is so much fun and it also can get personal. But I especially love writing songs when I need a little creative juice flowing.

**** Working on my follow up book, to my best seller, ” Hello Love, Where’s Cupid 2nd Ed” called, “Relationship Impossible” which should be out in 2021

Paperback is also available for those who still love to hold them

Your Tip For Tuesday

The recipe for happiness is trying to stop controlling everyone else. Worry about YOU!


1. Stop trying to tell people to wear the masks- your posts aren’t changing minds instead they are working against you.
2. Stop trying to tell people who to vote for- your posts aren’t changing minds, mostly everyone knows who they are voting for already.
3. Stop judging people- you only walked in on the chapter that they LET you walk in on, social media posts don’t tell you anything about what people go through, who people are and the battles they are fighting in silence.
4. Again, your nose belongs on your face and NOT in other people’s business- control YOUR emotions- control YOUR reactions and then maybe you’ll be happier.   hearts

Words Matter: Be Ashamed If You Body Shame Others Online

Yesterday was my cousin’s wedding ceremony.  Due to Covid19, the wedding has been postponed twice, so they decided to have a legal ceremony on the day that they had their first date.  That’s not what this post is about, but it’s the partly the reason I am writing it.  Yesterday I wore this little black dress that I recently bought.  It was a dress that was not loose fitting, but a little snug in the midsection.  Every time I ever need to dress up to go to a function, I spend hours in the mirror criticizing myself about how I “think” people are going to perceive me. ( Of course I am wrong, but my brain doesn’t think so at the time.)  I put this dress on and spun around looking at myself in the mirror, looking to see just how much of midsection was “noticeable.”   I hate to go out and not look “skinny,” in whatever I am wearing.  I say to myself that If I don’t feel comfortable that I will have a lousy time.

Yesterday was very different.

I usually end up talking myself out of wearing something and put on something else, but yesterday I didn’t. I kept that little black dress on and went to the wedding and enjoyed myself.  Now, I am not fat. I am not obese. I am not heavy or big-boned. I am of a normal weight for a short girl.  I don’t wear a size 0 or size 4 or even a size 6.  Depending on the brand, I am any where from a size 8 to a size 12.  Seriously, the way that clothes are made today is unreal.  I should be the same size no matter what brand I buy, but I am not.

This got me thinking yesterday of all the body shaming going down on social media lately. I see young girls on TikTok posting videos of,  “How to get skinny.”   I see young women posting videos of them telling others that they have to get back to being skinny and so forth.  I also see guys, body shaming women.  Some of the comments are so over the top nasty.

1) ” I don’t know what you are doing but you look so much better now! Look at all the weight you lost!”

2) “If you lose weight someone will love you.”

3) “Look at that fat body. What a waste of a pretty face.”

4) “You don’t have the right body to be doing that.”

5) “Why are you posting a picture of you in a bikini when you are no where near being a bikini model!”

6) Now that Pat Mahomes got his big contract he can now dump that disgusting girlfriend.”  ( yesterday, he got the biggest contract in NFL history)

Now body shaming isn’t just about saying rude and obnoxious things, but it’s also when a guy ONLY pays a woman a compliment on HOW she looks.  ( Beautiful, gorgeous, hot, sizzling, etc,”  Why can’t guys ever just compliment  a girl/woman without using her looks as part of the compliment?

Now we all can do one day with a bad hair day, or wish that parts of our bodies were different, but sometimes it is overwhelming which stops us from doing all kinds of things.  We start to develop anxiety about our bodies. We start to question why someone would even want to love us or even be with us in a romantic situation.

This is why body shaming has to stop.

We then become ashamed of our muffin tops, love handles, or flat bums. We then pick apart other parts of our body like our noses, thighs, arms,  and legs. And for what? To be accepted by a bunch of immature, self-conceited , superficial guys who don’t look like the Ken doll that they should be as they want to be with ever girl that resembles Barbie!

Give me a break!

Looks don’t make the man or the woman.  What should matter most is the person they are on inside; their personality.  Would you rather be with someone so vain or be with someone who was caring, compassionate, funny, and who supported your vision for the future?

Looks fade, who that person is from the inside out stays forever.

The next time you see someone body shaming someone else on social media tell them this; ““I do not give a &$#! about what men think about my body. I don’t care about what women think about my body. My body is not for other people, and the only person whose opinion matters about how I look is mine.