Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Is Every Body Really Beautiful?

Having a healthy body image means that a person accepts the way they look without trying to change their body to fit what they think they should look like since society portrays “what we should look like and be” in order to be accepted. This attitude is very dangerous because the greater our discontent with how we measure up when compared to what society tells us we “should” look like, the more negative our body image, and the greater the risk for extreme behaviors.

When you are talking about weight and women, you cannot wage war on obesity without waging war on the people who live in those “obese” bodies. No one should be bullied for their weight or food choices, but ‘fat pride’ promotes dangerous weight levels. And while shopping at Target, yet once again, I came across a T-shirt that said, “Every Body Is Beautiful” – and I found myself saying, “No,” out loud. Empowering women of non-Barbie proportions to feel good about themselves, is one thing. But suggesting that being a size 30 is just as healthy as being a size 12 isn’t a body-positive message either – it’s an irresponsible lie. And what is worse is the fact that these women are being used in the industry to sell products, clothes, and food designed to “celebrate” their non-skinny bodies.

Think about this for a second: smoking is an addiction that many struggle to control, as is weight, but we don’t celebrate it with social media campaigns about smoking pride the same as they do with “fat pride.” While what you do with your own body is your own business, actively encouraging unhealthy lifestyle choices and denying health risks with being obese on social media isn’t promoting body positivity, it’s the stepping stones to having an eating disorder. This idea that you are “fat but fit” is just a social media campaign that promotes being unhealthy all for a good buck.

Now, as I don’t agree that every woman needs to be a size 2 to be accepted, I think the main focus of society shouldn’t be the outer shell we are in, but rather who we are as people. The saying is true, “Looks fade, but personality and who you are is forever.”

When it comes to weight and women, it really is a catch 22: damned if you are skinny, and damned if you overweight and then talk about it all. Why can’t we just be allowed to celebrate WHO we are, not WHAT we look like? Remember, we create a legacy for ourselves. Do you want to be remembered on how you looked, or on your character?

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Woman Gets Duped On A Dating App

Am I supposed to be shocked at this headline? It’s 2022 and women STILL haven’t learned how toxic, full of scams, and sexually-hungry dating apps are?

The story goes like this: A young woman thought she had met someone so incredibly special and talked online for many months and have fallen in love with him. So the next step is naturally to meet in person. She packed up her life and moved to Singapore to be with him and when she got there; she got the shock of her life: He was married! I though, am not shocked. This type of story happens A LOT!
Studies suggest that dating apps can make people feel more insecure about their appearance and bodies – and even become depressed. Studies have shown that the same areas of the brain that become activated when we experience physical pain are also activated when we experience rejection. Dating apps have turned dating into an “addictive game.” It’s now considered shopping for humans with the swipe of a thumb.

We bench (put a potential partner on hold in case we find someone better), breadcrumb (lead someone on), and ghost (use a fake profile to spy on their Instagram stories) which can seriously make someone want to vomit at the thought of dating. People have start realizing that dating apps are not for real connections, but for quickie ones. Dating apps are the drug that helps the boost the ego quickly and there we have created another narcissistic human thinking that as long as we get “high” on love we’re good.

Is it finally time to go back to finding love the old-fashioned way or can we still use technology as a way to build those connections we so badly want to build?

We’ve spent the best part of two years stuck behind screens which were steered by algorithms, so taking matters into our own hands feels exciting. That does not mean that we need to disembark technology all together. Social media is a great place to meet people of all backgrounds, yet is is still misused and most don’t understand how to use it in a positive way. When you have more conversation with the same person over and over again you start to build trust. Trust then build a relationship. You never know what you can learn about someone through conversation. I’m not saying that you should look at social media as a “dating pool” but in terms of finding people in which you have similar likes and views, it’s a great start if you still want to use technology to get to know people you otherwise probably wouldn’t meet in the real world. I still believe that meeting people and talking to people is the best way to know if that person is “the one” for you. The old saying is 100% true’ “Never judge a book by its cover.” And on social media and dating apps, you have to always remember, sometimes people cover up who they truly are, that’s why it’s best to get to know someone, meet them, talk with them; and let your gut intuition tell you if they are for real or not. You can’t tell that over text. You can’t tell that on a post or an app. At the end of the day, a relationship will not last if the couple doesn’t share a mutual bond on every level, including as individuals. Feeling your partner was committed to the relationship for the long haul and how appreciative you are of your mate were the largest predictors of relationship satisfaction.

And remember, it’s never a good idea to settle for someone who doesn’t provide the level of affection and passion that you want – no matter what that is. Relationships are not about playing games. They’re about mature and honest communication; don’t be afraid to have one.

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Mistakes NFL Teams Make When Drafting A QB

With the NFL Draft about 43 days away, you can bet that there will be some quarterbacks that will be drafted on day one. It’s definitely exciting when a team drafts a QB – simply because it is a brand new start for your team/ organization. Looking back as to some quarterbacks that have been drafted in year’s past; it is definitely smart to say that teams make mistakes when they draft a quarterback.

1- If I was an offensive coordinator in the NFL and I drafted a QB, I am making sure that I pay a visit to his college head coach to learn his playbook and the schemes that I can then use in the NFL to have my new QB ready as a rookie. So many teams ignore the college playbook and have the quarterback start from scratch with a completely new offense his first year.

2- Some NFL teams appear to be making an obvious mistake by taking quarterbacks who have good physical traits — like size, speed, and arm strength — but who struggle with the mental and mechanical skills — like accuracy, reading defenses, and making sound decisions when it comes to throwing the football.

3- Scouting is an inexact science; which means that experts disagree on the seemingly simple question of whether or not a quarterback is accurate. The decision to draft any player begins with the decision to have a scout evaluate that player in college. But the methods used for quarterbacks haven’t changed much in the past thirty to forty years, even as the NFL has changed drastically. This means that when a scout is sent to evaluate a quarterback, they mostly emphasize height, weight, and speed. Teams assume they can fix any mental problems and throwing mechanics to a greater extent than is possible.

4- There is a HUGE drop off in stats from college to the pros. Fans mostly see how a QB played in college and think those stats will occur in the NFL. The factors that are never considered as to how a QB coming out of college will play in the NFL are the offensive line play, production of receivers, opposing defenses, or coaches. People tend to forget that a quarterback needs to be developed in the NFL. College and the Pros are two different beasts and each player has their ow timeline as to when they will be “fully developed.” It’s also important to note, that the above, ( Offensive line play, talent of the receivers, and coaching play a big part in how well the drafted quarterback will play in the NFL.)

Coming on Friday, I will start the blog / podcast part of “Playing With The Boys” and breakdown Zach Wilson. ( There will be a video posted too)

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Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Why are women choosing to be single?

The number of women who are choosing this lifestyle has been growing long before we had to deal the pandemic. And long before we had to endure the last two and half years, single women had to deal with two labels: spinster and old maid.

There are many reasons we no longer use these terms: For starters its misogynist undertones and double standards can’t be ignored no matter how hard you try. A man, who choose the single life is called “A Bachelor” and they ever have a stupid show that celebrates that with it scripted of him having to make out with twenty five women in order to find “the one.”
The thing that I learned over the past two and half years is that, never marrying or taking a long-term partner is a valid choice but it is still sneered at as a woman who can’t “get a man,” when that couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s not that a woman “can’t get a man,” trust me, it’s that hard to do that. But she’s single because she is STILL waiting for a REAL man to SHOW up! There’s no point in dating and wasting your time and energy on a guy, “just to prove to others that you are desirable.” Why so many women think that they need to prove to co-workers, friends and family that they can date and will date is the stupidest shit ever!

Most women need to learn HOW to be SINGLE first, before they can enter the dating world and they don’t like to hear that. I know so many ladies out there that have this “need” to date and can’t see themselves as single. It’s like a curse – and then they go ahead and date the jerk just to say they are dating but then complain that he is a jerk!

And with dating apps and folks in such a hurry to get into ANY relationship in 2022, it’s sad to see women thinking that they aren’t strong enough to WAIT for the REAL DEAL to make an entrance- not the prince in shining armor, that ship sailed years ago. Why can’t women realize a) how strong they are and b) worth it to wait for that guy who sees what they bring to the table?
Women not only have to deal with PMS, periods and then menopause. They have to deal with still not making the same about of money as a man, but yet doing the same amount of work as a man. Women still have to deal with hearing their friends who are married and have kids ask them, “Don’t you want a family of your own?” Or worse- having to deal with family members who say things like, “I always saw you with having kids, isn’t that still something you want?” Men NEVER get asked those questions… EVER! yeah sure a man when he reaches forty and unwed may have to deal with his mom telling him to “grow up and settle down,” but if that guy has siblings and they have already given that mom grand-kids, he really is in the clear.

Being single myself, I am DONE with dating JUST to date. ( All the hook ups, one nighters) I rather focus on myself and accomplishing career goals while I wait for an actual REAL man to come my way. I find that younger guys are more in tuned with wanting to build something and aren’t afraid to be with a successful woman, whereas a man over the age of thirty-five is more threatened by a strong and successful woman. (My age range is from 23 (and yes, if you are a guy turning 23… ) -30 for all those who are interested to know and have asked me. If you want to know what else I am looking for a man, DM me on Twitter or Instagram, and I will tell you. ) Guys who are older than thirty-five are pretty much established in their work and in their lives – they are uninteresting, and have premeditated views on women that are not so pretty. Whereas the guys 23-30, are not established, have so much zest, zeal for life and are open to possibilities. There’s a lot I can bring to the table in a relationship with a younger guy. For starters, if we’re dating, I want to be your second priority. I want your first priority to be you, your ambitions, your life and your future, because seeing you happy makes me happy. Seeing you succeed pushes me to succeed. Finding happiness and security alone, are crucial to finding it together.
Your time and energy is better spent with people who make the effort to pay it back or forward. We laugh at people who still use Windows 95, but we cling to opinions we formed in 1995. It’s 2022, it’s time to be more open to women who are strong, independent, not afraid to speak her mind, and are open to sharing new possibilities with a man who sees what an older woman brings to table is undeniably something that can’t be found with girls in their twenties.

Some people are settling, some people are settling down, and some people refuse to settle for anything less than the real deal.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Is He or Isn’t He?

There are things that guys do on Instagram that show you up front that they are players and not legit meaning the guys you need to STAY AWAY from. ( Sadly, most of them NOT all of them are athletes, ya know, because they think they are superior to everyone else. )

  1. He won’t follow you on Instagram – This is a classic sign by the way. And the reason being is pretty much simply that he’s hiding a relationship, and wants women to think he is available when he is not. It’s classic because guys who are proud of the woman they have will show her off to their followers. Guys who want to let other guys know – she’s mine; she’s taken. If a guy doesn’t want you to be be his follower on IG, then he is simply hiding something he doesn’t want to see… and to top that off, ANYONE that still has a private account is surely hiding shit.
  2. He is a bikini account troll – He follows EVERY girl that his posing in her bikini, it doesn’t matter if she is a supermodel, an influencer, or the girl that leaves next door to him. He doesn’t want you to see that, hence why he hasn’t followed you nor wants you to follow you. By the way, most quarterbacks/athletes in the NFL do this and when they do it’s a sign that they are the most superficial guys on the planet. Any guy that ONLY focuses on a woman’s looks and that’s it, isn’t a guy you want to date let alone stand next too.
  3. Now, let’s change gears and let me tell guys how to understand if a woman is interested in you and also a word of wise to the ladies out here too! First, to the ladies: if you are interested in a guy it’s OKAY to pay attention to them, it’s OKAY to treat them like you feel a special connection to them because out brains are more psychologically primed to like people who like us. Don’t though only focus on him and him only. The reason being is that when you focus on more than one guy, the guy that is truly attracted to you, will lock you up and not want you to pay so much attention to other guys, Yes, jealously here is what makes guys realize that he wants you and therefore he will invite you to follow him on IG, he will post about you so every guy knows hands off, she’s mine. So guys, if a woman is paying attention to you it’s because she sees the best in you and wants you to connect with you. Again the brain does unconsciously attract others who share similar interests in. Instead of ignoring her and playing the stupid mind games, reciprocate back, have conversations, after all, conversation is the heart and soul of Instagram and social media in general. It’s okay to talk to folks who aren’t in your circle ( circles don’t have corners) – it also widens your horizons when it comes to learning and growing as a person. You never know what you can learn about someone when you take the time to have a conversation with them.
Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Playing With The Boys

As a girl who loves football, I hear guys say it all the time:

“I have no idea what I’m talking about”
“Football is for the boys”
“Girls have no idea about what it takes to be a quarterback or play period”
“You’re just a fan girl…”

With that said here’s what I know:

There isn’t a position that comes with more pressure, demand or expectations than the guy playing under center each week.

Accuracy, anticipation, footwork, pocket presence, athleticism, decision making, mental toughness are seven traits that are must-haves; which makes a quarterback very intriguing to watch.

There’s offense plays I like, and there’s offense plays I don’t.

We’ll start to unwrap it in the Spring of 2022 with a podcast, book and a blog.

Here’s the podcast to listen to what is coming —> CLICK

TO watch the video announcement — > CLICK

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

A Coach’s Life Documentary

Being a cheerleading coach / choreographer is not as glamorous or easy as people think. First off, it’s very time consuming. I work on my coaching/choreography/team over 25 hours a week. Not to mention if we have football or basketball games, then I have to dedicate that time to the game we are cheering at, besides practicing with that team.
Yes, there are 2 teams that I coach at the same time: The Competition Team and the Football or Basketball Cheer Team (depending on the season)

I decided to put this to video and show everyone what is really is like being a coach- also it’s a sneak peek as to what it’s like inside competitive high school cheerleading.

Here is the video / reel on my Instagram page: Click here

NOTE:
I will be producing a few documentaries in 2022 – here are the social media channels to watch them:

Youtube

Twitter

Instagram – two profiles: Sassy One and the Cheer One

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

With Love All Is Possible

This is the time of year that most believe in miracles and believe in love. This is also the time of year that sadly, most don’t. They don’t believe in reason for the season. They don’t believe that we all have a purpose and they don’t believe in others either.

Recently I saw an Instagram story from an athlete that basically said, “Don’t trust nobody!” And I thought to myself, how sad is that? But if this athlete is going to preach about God, does that mean he doesn’t trust God, his wife, his teammates, his kids?
Sometimes God is disguised as people on Earth and he speaks through people. If you’re telling others not to trust anybody that that means that you don’t trust God either.

Usually people who have had a traumatic past experience are the ones who stop trusting other people. Trust issues can be associated with depression, anxiety, fear of abandonment and attachment issues. They can stem from abuse, social rejection or just having low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem are less likely to trust others. Which is ironic that this particular athlete always preaches about believing in yourself. Sometimes, though on social media people post things subconsciously to try and pick themselves up and not others. Even though their posts inspire other people the point of the post was to help make themselves believe what they are putting out there and were never intended to inspire others.

Some people have unrealistic expectations. The higher the expectations the more likely it is they won’t be met. Trust usually isn’t something people openly talk about or address in relationships until it’s been broken, and by then it’s often too late to salvage the relationship or the breach of trust seems too big to overcome. Trust is the foundation for your relationship and the key to love. When you trust your partner, then you feel secure that they won’t leave in difficult times. Trust and love go together as does loyalty. Without trust there is no love, and without loyalty there is no trust. Because love and trust so often go together, navigating relationships with people that we still love but no longer trust can be very difficult.

I don’t want to live with a bitter heart or a closed heart. I want to live with an open heart. And yes, will I get hurt? Sure. But that risk is worth it because love is worth it. All kinds of love require trust which is a quality found in people and not necessarily in relationships. People you can trust have integrity and do what they say they will do. A trustworthy person does not lie, manipulate, or deceive and this makes love possible.

I believe that you can fall for anyone, even without knowing them completely. You should first spend some time knowing the person, understanding them and deciding whether you can trust that person or not. Listen to your heart because your heart will never lie to you while your mind will play games. Trust to me is knowing I am totally responsible for and can be counted on me at all times. If I am trustworthy, I will trust others. Trust is the foundation of loving another human being.

How do you know when someone really loves you?

If you find they want to spend almost every minute of free time with you. If they always compliment you, no matter what. They care about the little things that make your day better. When somebody truly cares about somebody else, love evolves into something physical and mental that needs to be shared with the one person who takes up nearly all their thoughts and time.

As humans we are programmed to need relationships; they’re essential for our survival emotionally and physically. Relationships keep us grounded which in turn helps us stay sane in this chaotic world. But not all of us are lucky enough to find someone who loves us unconditionally. Some people don’t even know what love truly means. Love is not the materialistic things, as some would think, it’s the moments we share with that particular person that makes us feel together and whole. You value their personality and want their friendship. Love does make us do crazy things at time, but it’s that deep affection and admiration that we feel towards another person that makes us know that we found our “soulmate” There is a warmth in your heart, an inner peace you can feel. No words need to be spoken. It is not just unconditional love, but unconditional acceptance.

So as we march on in this Christmas season, remember this, loving someone, is about giving them the space to be themselves. If you are perfectly happy with their flaws and love them for who they are, then you have found a soulmate. Soulmates actually come into our lives to challenge us and help us grow in a way that serves us and moves us forward. We can often miss out on the opportunities to be challenged by someone else the universe has sent because that person wasn’t sent to us as we hoped or the way we thought they would be sent to us.

Again, love, trust, loyalty. Without one, we don’t have the other. The three in this day in age are rare. And if you are lucky enough to find all three, count your blessings.

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Get To Know Me (stop stalking my social media)

Yes, there are “those people” who think they can “get to know” someone by what they post, but that is the wrong idea to have! Mostly people post things to social media that they either LOVE or INTERESTS them. People also post things, at least I know I do, to motivate, inspire, or to be sassy/witty. How could you really know, truly know someone by their posts?

So here are 10 questions and 10 answers for you to “Get To Know” me. HINT: if you really want to get to know me the best way to ASK me!

Question 1: If I had to eat the same foods over and over, what might those be?

Answer: I could literally eat pizza, pasta, peanut butter and French Fries every day if needed.

Question 2: What is the dumbest way you’ve been hurt?

Answer: Luckily for me, it’s the ONLY time I broke a bone. 6th grade on my best friend’s driveway on Valentine’s Day, I slipped on the ice and broke my wrist.

Question 3: Who is your all-time favorite Disney character?

Answer: It’s Cinderella. Classic.

Question 4: What am I afraid of?

Answer: Bees, Spiders, Snakes ( I stepped on 2 of them growing up!) I don’t like the dark but I’m not afraid of it- I rather not be in the dark if that makes sense!

Question 5: Favorite Flower / favorite bug / Favorite color:

Answer: Daisies / Ladybugs / Pink

Question 6: Favorite Vacation Spots

Answer: ANYWHERE there is a Beach and Lake George, NY – I love that town so much! It’s quint, relaxing, and fun. Also there people there are so nice!

Question 7: What talents do you have that nobody knows:

Answer: I played the flute and violin growing up. I also wrote a song that was played on Z100 . Also, I am good at finding missing objects. Anytime any one has something missing, they call me.

Question 8: What did I study in college?

Answer: I started with journalism as I wanted to be a hockey writer or a football writer, but I switched my major to teaching because I fell in love with the kids I was teaching in the summer one year as an assistant and never looked back. So I majored in Education with a minor in English. This was I could always come back to writing later on. Everything does come full circle and I have written over 9 books. And millions of blogs. (either as a ghostwriter, blogger for other sites or my own material.)

Question 9: If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

Answer: Sometimes the best adventures are the ones not planned. I would simply just go on an adventure, whether it was driving some place, shopping, finding a new fun thing to try, ( I have never yet gone to a golf range before) going on a nature walk in a new place, or just spending time with my nephew and niece – those are unplanned adventures for sure!!

Question 10: What are your favorite holidays?

Answer: My Birthday ( yes, it’s a freaking holiday! I celebrate all month long (April BTW) And Christmas! I love baking my Christmas cookies and buying and making gifts for others. It’s my favorite time of the year!

Posted on by Stephanie's Corner

Remembering 9/11

9/11/01

I will always remember where I was on that day and how it impacted everyone’s lives. I remember working at a school that day and having a co-worker tell me her dad worked in the North Tower and in 50 years he NEVER missed a day of work until that day.

I remember having to comfort a parent who thought his wife was on 1 of those planes. Luckily she wasn’t.

I remember driving home that night and seeing State Troopers parked at every exit on the NY State Thruway

.I remember learning that my neighbor lost his dad that day trying to rescue others. He was a firefighter.

I remember hearing about friends who lost siblings in the buildings.

I also remember how this Country BANNED TOGETHER and NEVER let Politics stand between each other – how we were kind and caring of one another. We need to REMEMBER that because we as a Country have lost sight of what TRULY is important.

If you don’t want to do it for yourself and your neighbors do it for the 3,000 lives that were lost that day. Don’t let hate win but rather let love reign.

💙
♥️

#september11#remembering911#twintowers