The number of women who are choosing this lifestyle has been growing long before we had to deal the pandemic. And long before we had to endure the last two and half years, single women had to deal with two labels: spinster and old maid.
There are many reasons we no longer use these terms: For starters its misogynist undertones and double standards can’t be ignored no matter how hard you try. A man, who choose the single life is called “A Bachelor” and they ever have a stupid show that celebrates that with it scripted of him having to make out with twenty five women in order to find “the one.”
The thing that I learned over the past two and half years is that, never marrying or taking a long-term partner is a valid choice but it is still sneered at as a woman who can’t “get a man,” when that couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s not that a woman “can’t get a man,” trust me, it’s that hard to do that. But she’s single because she is STILL waiting for a REAL man to SHOW up! There’s no point in dating and wasting your time and energy on a guy, “just to prove to others that you are desirable.” Why so many women think that they need to prove to co-workers, friends and family that they can date and will date is the stupidest shit ever!
Most women need to learn HOW to be SINGLE first, before they can enter the dating world and they don’t like to hear that. I know so many ladies out there that have this “need” to date and can’t see themselves as single. It’s like a curse – and then they go ahead and date the jerk just to say they are dating but then complain that he is a jerk!
And with dating apps and folks in such a hurry to get into ANY relationship in 2022, it’s sad to see women thinking that they aren’t strong enough to WAIT for the REAL DEAL to make an entrance- not the prince in shining armor, that ship sailed years ago. Why can’t women realize a) how strong they are and b) worth it to wait for that guy who sees what they bring to the table?
Women not only have to deal with PMS, periods and then menopause. They have to deal with still not making the same about of money as a man, but yet doing the same amount of work as a man. Women still have to deal with hearing their friends who are married and have kids ask them, “Don’t you want a family of your own?” Or worse- having to deal with family members who say things like, “I always saw you with having kids, isn’t that still something you want?” Men NEVER get asked those questions… EVER! yeah sure a man when he reaches forty and unwed may have to deal with his mom telling him to “grow up and settle down,” but if that guy has siblings and they have already given that mom grand-kids, he really is in the clear.
Being single myself, I am DONE with dating JUST to date. ( All the hook ups, one nighters) I rather focus on myself and accomplishing career goals while I wait for an actual REAL man to come my way. I find that younger guys are more in tuned with wanting to build something and aren’t afraid to be with a successful woman, whereas a man over the age of thirty-five is more threatened by a strong and successful woman. (My age range is from 23 (and yes, if you are a guy turning 23… ) -30 for all those who are interested to know and have asked me. If you want to know what else I am looking for a man, DM me on Twitter or Instagram, and I will tell you. ) Guys who are older than thirty-five are pretty much established in their work and in their lives – they are uninteresting, and have premeditated views on women that are not so pretty. Whereas the guys 23-30, are not established, have so much zest, zeal for life and are open to possibilities. There’s a lot I can bring to the table in a relationship with a younger guy. For starters, if we’re dating, I want to be your second priority. I want your first priority to be you, your ambitions, your life and your future, because seeing you happy makes me happy. Seeing you succeed pushes me to succeed. Finding happiness and security alone, are crucial to finding it together.
Your time and energy is better spent with people who make the effort to pay it back or forward. We laugh at people who still use Windows 95, but we cling to opinions we formed in 1995. It’s 2022, it’s time to be more open to women who are strong, independent, not afraid to speak her mind, and are open to sharing new possibilities with a man who sees what an older woman brings to table is undeniably something that can’t be found with girls in their twenties.
Some people are settling, some people are settling down, and some people refuse to settle for anything less than the real deal.