5 Ways To Love Yourself Everyday

Sleep, wake up, work. And repeat. That’s a daily grind that we all seem to go through daily as we dread the next time the alarm goes off. There’s more to life than work. What is one thing you can do every day to take care of yourself, to gain some important, “me time?”

Start your day off with meditation and exercise.

Sit and focus on how you breathe for at least 1 to 5 minutes or preferably 15 to 20 min. Connect with nature by taking your workouts outside (also great for getting your daily dose of Vitamin D), do some yoga, or simply stretch. Endorphins will surface and lift your spirit and immune system higher. I love going for 2 mile walks.

Read.

Pick a few articles from blogs and websites that you find inspiring and read them throughout the day. Most people don’t’ have time to simply read a book, but if you choose to read a book, make it fictional. The reason is so you can find an escape for at least 15-20 minutes a day reading something that enraptures your imagination.

Put yourself on a schedule so that you make time for play.

Use your vacation days or use a personal day. Even a single mental health day or a short trip out of town is a great mental booster! Get out of your normal routine and do something out of the ordinary. Too often we get use to our comfort zone, that we fall into a rut or we burn out, so use your vacation days before they roll over. Also take time to enjoy the weekends. Weekends with no play are no fun.

Have A Hobby

Letting your creative juices flow with stop you from getting caught up in the monotony of daily life. You also can find it fun and interesting to learn a new skill, or polish up on one that you already have. You could also meet new people as a result of your hobby and join a group or go to a workshop/class on it. Cooking, sewing, woodwork, painting, the ideas are endless and up to you!

Unplug from technology.

What is the first thing people tend to do when they first wake up? They grab their phones, tablets, or laptops and start plugging away. Leave the electronics alone until you’ve given yourself time to get ready for the day ahead. Make time for breakfast, which usually gets ignored or forgotten about and save the email, Facebook, and other social media platforms for the end of your morning ritual.

Have a great Valentine’s Day- Remember to LOVE yourself FIRST.  If you don’t, you can’t expect anyone else too.

hearts

Do You Believe In Magic?

First off, I want to wish a Merry Christmas to all my readers and fans.

When we are little, Christmas is all about the anticipation of the “big day!” We all write letters to Santa Claus, we decorate the tree, make Christmas cookies and also make our parents a homemade gift.

As we get older we tend to move away from these traditions and sometimes that special magic of the season fades. It’s so easy to get consumed by the commercial side of the season, which can take away some of the joy and magic. Not only that, but as an adult we also get stressed at this time of year. We have to deal with our adult lives, (work, paying bills, taking care of our family, etc) and also getting ready for the holiday. This is when we just try and “get through” another holiday.

Why do some adults lose that love, that magic of Christmas?

As I explained this to some folks this past week. Christmas isn’t just about finding out that Santa isn’t the one who buys you those gifts your find under the tree. The truth is that I still believe in Santa. I believe in the magic of the holiday, that miracles can happen, that the unexpected can take place, and that happiness surrounds us if we just take the time to look and feel it. Santa doesn’t necessarily have to be a person. Santa can be a feeling. He’s the hope we hold in our hearts that good things are possible if we only believe.

The magic of the season is all about giving of yourself to make someone else’s life a little better, a little happier, and a little sweeter. See, Christmas in itself is real magic. It’s not the magic of wizards and wands you read in books. The Christmas spirit is ageless, timeless and giving. Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. It is meant to bring a message of peace and hope in times when we think that peace is never a possibility. Christ was born with a pure heart and humbled himself by lying in a manger. Poor or rich it doesn’t matter, what matters is what comes from within.

Christmas is so much more than getting presents. It is truly the holiday of giving and love. The greatest gifts are not those wrapped under the tree or dressed in colorful bows. They are those given with an open heart, one wrapped in the ribbons of faith, hope, and love.

25 Random Things About Me

So, I was thinking…. maybe it would be cool for readers to get to know who I am and not just “read” my blog posts.  Then it hit me…. how about a list of 25 Random Things About Me? Well… here it is in really no order.

  1. Coffee runs through my veins
  2. I enjoy crafting, sewing,and art projects
  3. Baking is a passion
  4. I still love reading an actual paperback
  5. I love my sports teams ( Jets, Rangers, Yankees, and Knicks- NY teams)
  6. Daisies are my favorite flower
  7. My favorite holidays are my birthday, Halloween and Christmas
  8. I started dancing at age 7, was a cheerleader, coached cheerleading and was a choreographer.
  9. My love for writing started in 5th grade
  10. I coached basketball including an AAU team
  11. I won the school spirit award in High School
  12. I hate scary movies
  13. I love all kinds of music but I am not too fond of heavy metal
  14. I was in my local newspaper twice- once when I was 3 and interviewed once when the Knicks fired their head coach
  15. I was also interviewed my the Wall Street Journal
  16. I feed the birds, squirrels, and chipmunks in my backyard every morning. If I don’t they knock on my door. ( Not kidding!)
  17. I still wish on the stars at night
  18. I believe in the magic of Christmas and miracles
  19. Never ask me for directions, you’ll get lost.
  20. I collect tea cups and elephant statues
  21. I was not made for winter
  22. The only insects I like are butterflies and lady bugs
  23. I love giving things and sending cards to people for particular no reason than to make them smile or inspire them
  24. I have written toddler programs for schools
  25. I started my social media career in 2008

Now, I was thinking… I’m tired of all the hate and politics on social media. How about we take social media back for the fun it should be about and the positivity?

Take the #Random25Challenge and post 25 Random things about you. Use the hashtag when posting.

PS: So, there ya go. Now you know a little bitty more about me. Who are you?

 

20 Signs That You’re In The Right Relationship

You Are In The Right Relationship If…

20) You spend time together doing things you both enjoy

19) You spend time apart doing things you each enjoy

18) When you fight, you fight with a purpose, not just to fight

17) You each have your own friends

16) You maintain your own identity

15) Your family and even your friends like seeing you as a couple

14) The respect you have for each other is mutual

13) You bring out the best in each other

12) You both share future goals

11) You are attracted to your partner mentally, emotionally and physically.

10) You keep each other’s secrets

9) You make a great team and people comment on that.

8) You are sexually compatible

7) You enjoy even doing boring tasks together

6) You both share the same financial goals

5) You both feel that you can be open about your feelings without being judged

4) You give each other the right amount of love and the right amount of space

3) You trust each other- you are always honest with each other

2)You are there for your partner’s successes but also their failures

1) You have accepted each other’s pasts and flaws

Always, always, always, go with your gut! Your intuition will never let you down when it comes to emotions and feelings. With the right partner, you will find fulfillment, peace, and love. A person who can be excited about your success and goals in life is someone who won’t hold you back for one reason or another. Most unhealthy relationships include some form of sabotaging of one partner. If your partner wants to change you in any way, and they aren’t accepting you for who you are, that is a sign of a controlling person and they will never treat you properly. In other words, RUN! Another good sign that someone is right for you is if that person can fit in to other parts of your life and you’re not just living the “relationship bubble.” Your friends and family get along with this person, they have met this person and your relationship is NOT a secret! Secret romances NEVER turn out good- ever!

Finally, every good relationship has boundaries. Boundaries are important because it means someone isn’t a pushover, and they can communicate when they are unhappy. Growth is very important in relationships, particularly in the same direction, so you need to be able to have arguments, and conflicts and points of disagreements without wanting to kill each other.

*** The follow up to Hello Love, Where’s Cupid?, “Ax The Ex,” will be coming in 2019.***

The top 5 online dating safety tips for women

The dating scene these days just isn’t what it’s cracked up to be!  People today have for some reason, given up on meeting people in person, which is the best bet for a long, lasting relationship, and have head to online dating sites and apps instead. Now, when it was first created, online dating was a fun new avenue for a woman on the prowl.  But, now it’s a dangerous place filled with cheaters, scammers, criminals, and guys that just want to hook up.  It’s not easy to find a lasting relationship when you are searching through thousands of profiles.  Even though you are sitting at home in your PJ’s hiding behind a keyboard, you need to still be careful of whom and who you eventually decide to meet. Here are some straightforward tips to do just that!

1. Only arrange a meeting with someone you have been getting to know for a while now. If you feel that you are at the point where you want to meet someone, always meet them in a public place, away from your home and be sure to tell someone where you are going.
2. Do not tell him where you live. Never give out your address, until you feel safe to do so. This should be after a few dates. Once they know where you live, there is no going back.
3. Do not accept a ride on the first date. Use your own method of transportation. Even if they seem like a great guy, you should not get in a car with them. Especially if you are alone with them and not out on a group date.
4.  Do not go to any secluded areas. Even if you want to be alone, remember that you are on a date with someone you have no idea about. Yeah he tells you what he does for a living and blah.. blah… blah.. , but how do you really know? Give yourself a chance to really get to know  him out before you take his word for everything and before he takes you to his parents house on the beach.
5. Pay attention to your gut feeling. You don’t want to be kicking yourself later on if you didn’t listen to it when it told you that this guy was no good, and now you are stuck in a big complete mess.  This is hard to do because people tend to fall in love with a profile, not a person online and your intuition may be foggy because of it.

the bottom line for being safe on any online dating site or app is this:

Let someone know you’re going out with someone new, tell them where you’re going, and set a time for them to check in on you and make sure you’re okay.  You should never feel bad for putting your safety first, even if it means you have to do something that feels rude.

Traditional Dating vs Online Dating

Traditional dating is quite simple; it is going out to a social event, (Bar, community gathering, library, coffee shop, sporting event, etc,) and meeting people. While you are out, your eye catches someone who tickles your fancy and you make your way over there to start a conversation. While conversing, you decide to give this person your phone number. You both start talking and then one day decide to go out on a date. That is what traditional dating is all about. Make no mistake, meeting people offline is better than meeting them online. Today, people have given up on traditional dating. It’s work. It’s effort. People want that quick relationship and that quick date. And if they get into a situation, they just are a click away from replacing them instead of working things out.

The first thing you see online is someone’s profile picture and dating profile. Not only can they post fake pictures, there have been people who post pictures of what they looked like five years ago! They also can tell you they love life when in fact they complain about just about everything. When you meet someone in person, they can’t pretend they don’t really look like that. There’s no fake picture or who they truly are. You can’t read body language through the computer.

Any site that “claims” to be able to match you to your perfect mate if you fill out all 60 questions, is a hoax. There is NO scientific evidence that backs up these algorithms. If they claim that their scientific algorithms work, why do you need to spend 9 -12 months to find someone with whom you should totally click with right away?

When it comes to love it seems we are at the mercy of our biochemistry. First there is a lust, then an attraction, then love. If we get down to the science, attraction happens in the first 30 seconds. You can’t do that online. Dating online is totally different. Two Words: Choice Overload. Not only are there way too many people on these sites, but you would have to have gone out on 100 dates before you actually have chosen your “perfect match.” Now seriously who has time to not only read through all those profiles, but who has actually gone out with 100 people they have met online?

When you go on a search for love, you are looking to settle. But when you let love find you and unexpectedly, you find the person who is meant for you. Online dating is good for one thing, banging and the quick fix while going out and meeting people the traditional way is for those who want the real thing and refuse to settle. You have to show people you are emotionally available to connect and online you can’t feel or see that connection at all. Not only do you connect emotionally faster in person, but pheromones are known to be involved in sexual attraction and during the most fertile time in her menstrual cycle, a woman gives off a different scent which may make her more attractive to potential male suitors. How can you do that online?

We use Yelp to check which restaurant to go to. Pick movies using another app. We are so anxious to control the outcomes that we are unable to take any real risks. We don’t see Andrew or Andrea as people on dating sites, we see Andrew or Andrea, the 70% perfect match. We don’t see them as people, we see them as objects.

A 2015 study found that positive personality traits actually increase perceived facial attractiveness. So if you are just basing your choice on looks, you maybe choosing in correctly. When you find someone to date traditionally, you already can see or get a glimpse of that person’s personality while online you are only going by what they are telling you.

When you meet people traditionally, you typically see them in a social context, such as how they interact with workmates, friends and family members. Online is made of words and images.

Researchers estimate that 25% of rapists found people to assault through online dating services and being scammed in person is less likely than online. Online dating is great if you want a casual fling, but not for anything longer lasting because there are so many dishonest people seeking cheap thrills. If a situation arises, you can split fast and a click here or there, you have your next fling. Marriage is down 50% because everyone is falling for the, “Your perfect match can be found on this website,” crap.

Traditional dating allows you to learn about your partner slowly over time, preserving an element of mystery and making future discoveries more meaningful. You don’t have to physically meet the individual until you are completely comfortable and secure in your interactions, which can go on for months or even years. All that time you “try” and get to know someone online, you could be actually physically getting to know someone you met in person.

One downside to Internet dating has to do with one of its defining characteristics: the profile. In the real world, it takes days or even weeks for the mating dance to unfold, as people learn each others likes and dislikes and stumble through the awkward but often rewarding process of finding common ground.
Online, that process is telescoped and front-loaded, packaged into a neat little digital profile, usually with an equally artificial video attached.
This means that people may unknowingly skip over potential mates for the wrong reasons. The person you see on paper doesn’t translate neatly to a real, live human being, and there’s no predicting or accounting for the chemistry you might feel with a person whose online profile was the opposite of what you thought you wanted. Offline, that kind of attraction would spark organically.  Also, traditional dating has something so important that online dating doesn’t: The use of one’s intuition.

When you meet a creep or a jerk, your intuition goes off and let’s you know- there’s body language that you are reading and your intuition let’s you know. Whereas online, while we are talking to someone using these sites, we create this image of who we believe these people are like, creating a false pretense and not being able to “weed out” the creeps, jerks, and losers we would have not even given the time of day in person.   So, when you finally meet the online person in person, you false image you created deludes your intuition from working at all- meaning we trust these people when we really shouldn’t.

 

Complicated Love – Now Released

complicated love cover

For Immediate Release:

June 15, 2018

Nyack, NY: Author Stephanie Dolce surprised her fans yesterday by releasing a special 3 book preview book called “Complicated Love.”

Complicated Love is a special book of 3 previews of books Author Stephanie Dolce has written, with the exception of the last one, which is a writing in progress. Diary of a Drama Queen is already published and you can find it on Amazon, Lulu and Barnes and Noble. My Tiara Is Giving Me A Headache was a mini-series exclusively on Amazon, which was turned into the novel, “Untouched,” which can be found on Amazon, Lulu, and Barnes and Noble. My Perfect, Imperfect Life is a writing in progress, so in this preview book you get a raw look at the story before the edits, before the design, before the final product. ( It may be written in a script/book)

This book, “Complicated Love,” is an exclusive paperback that can be bought on Lulu.com ONLY.

http://www.stephaniedolce.com

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