When men attempt bold gestures it’s considered romantic and sweet. When a woman attempts them, it’s considered desperate and crazy. Watch any romantic movie and they will tell you the same old, boring, story: If you want to win the love of your life, an over-the-top romantic gesture is the way to go. But hold on, wait a minute, those bold gestures are for the man to do, not a woman.
When Maroon 5 sings, “Baby, I’m preying on you tonight/Maybe you think that you can hide/I can smell your scent for miles,” hardly anyone flinches at the creepy craziness of these lyrics. But when Taylor Swift writes a song, people accuse her of being spiteful, vengeful, and retreating to her crazy woman-den to write mean songs about men.
The vast majority of women may be totally “normal” in a relationship. But then you see one woman acting jealous, insecure, or worse, going after a guy they want and you think, “See!? Women are crazy!” See, when a woman does something “crazy,” like show a man a bold gesture, it’s because she is crazy. When a man does the exact same thing, it’s because men are romantic and strong.
The reasons are simple though: Women feel more emotions than men — it’s that they’re more likely to talk about it, therefore when men actually show emotions, it’s them as weak. But when they show a romantic gesture, it shows them as the hunters, the strong vital man who hunts down his prey in order to salvage his manhood. Back in the day the romantic gestures were; opening the door for her, giving her flowers, taking her out on romantic dinner, giving her kiss on her forehead, basically be a gentlemen. Today that chivalry is nonexistent. It’s all about how far you can get with a woman today. Guys today don’t realize just how much we women want the old fashioned chivalry to make a comeback.
Men don’t like women to be initiators. At least the majority doesn’t even though you see men do Tiktoks where they “claim” that they enjoy being pursued. Now, it is important for me to add, that there are men who don’t mind if a woman asks him out, but that percentage is about 15%. The other 85% still want to be the hunter, “so to speak.”
So to the other 85% of men who assume that when a woman asks you out or presents you wilth a bold gestures let me tell you a few things: 1- yes she is bold and forward to ask you because SHE LIKES YOU! 2- NO, she is not pushy, demanding or controlling. 3- This idea that cannot be her protector because she is the one who asked you out is absurd! EVERY woman wants to be loved and feel protected no matter if you ask her or she asks you! 4- She will not make you submit to her will! Please! Now, if you date a woman who knows what she wants, doesn’t that make it easier for you? and finally 5, She will value my achievements and your dreams. Just because she approached you doesn’t mean that she doesn’t value what you bring to the table or what your goals in life are- that idea is so ridiculous!
If a woman asks you out, that is a compliment to you. She sees something in you that she wants, and she wants to get to know you. Embrace it, enjoy it and stop with the gender double standards. Healthy relationships involve honesty, trust, respect and open communication between partners and they take effort and compromise from both people. It shouldn’t matter at the end of the day, who asked who out, but the relationship that the two of you share.