When I check social media every day, it’s amazing how these 20 -something girls think that are such “hot stuff.” I really don’t make that much about it until they start messing with me – then I have to put them in their place. First off, this whole thing that women are “supposed” to support other women “just because” we’re women is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of- you don’t see men supporting other men “Just because” you see men competing against other men and rightfully so.

So what does a 40 year old woman have that a 20 year old girl doesn’t? Well for starters, experience thank you.

1- Girls in their twenties don’t know how to fully love themselves- every inch of their bodies. I would have avoided many of the decisions that I made in my life if I truly just accepted who I was when I was twenty. Most girls want that “perfect” body. There is NO such thing as to having the perfect body, no matter what Victoria’s Secret or Vogue may tell you. You should embrace who you are inside and out.

2- Girls in their twenties are far from being authentic. It’s all about fitting in, instead of standing out. Stop comparing your life to someone’s else life you see on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter… etc. Be real. Be you. You are worth it – just like everyone else you see. Don’t let what others are doing online, bring you down or your self-worth. No one gets to tell you what your value is- You know your worth when you stop giving discounts.

3- Sex. Sorry girls, but forty year old women have been “around the block” so to say. First all of, older women don’t just “hook up” with guys like girls in their twenties who are hooking up left and right these days. When we do “hook up” we do that because we feel close to the guy we are with. 40 year old women can completely let them self go physically- we don’t care about anything else and are more prone to trying new things since we are already secure with our bodies and not insecure like 20 year old girls are. We also know what we like, how to orgasm, and how to satisfy our partners, where as a twenty year old has no clue. ( https://amzn.to/2I6xN8c) – Chapter 13 FYI

4- Learn to live in the moment. If you master this when you are young, you will appreciate life much more through every single stage of it. Also, It’s not your job to make everyone else happy. And even if you do so, that doesn’t mean you’ll be happy. Life is short. Women in their forties know this. We don’t give a flying F- if you aren’t happy with our choices. We do what we know is going to make us happy- not others.

5-Life is not like football. Stop trying to “score points” with every opportunity. To win in life is to overcome every obstacle that life throws at you. No one dies counting how many “touchdowns” they scored and compares that to someone else’s “score total” – In the end that doesn’t matter.

6- Life is not like baseball. Don’t give people 3 times to hurt you, they lie to you once, that should be it. They are showing you who they are, and that is a person who doesn’t respect you enough to tell you the truth. Twenty-somethings give people way too many chances.

7- You don’t DESERVE things you EARN things. Stop thinking that everyone “owes” you something! Excuse me girl, but no one owes you a damn thing! You want that guy- go get him. You want that job- work for it. You want that car- buy it…. And so forth. Skip half the parties you go to, if you work, at something, you will become better at it.

8- Stick to the original plan. Don’t let anyone talk you out of it. What ever you choose to be; be. Just because someone else has an “idea” of what you should do with your life, doesn’t mean you have to follow “their” plan. It’s your life, so live it and to the best of your ability. Stop blaming everyone else for your problems and giving excuses as to why you can’t do something or why something didn’t work out. Stop asking for permission. Forty year old women KNOW this.

9- Twenty year old girls don’t know how to have an ACTUAL conversation! Put down your damn phone! Forty year old women have such better social skills than you simply because we weren’t born with cell phones, social media and that has taken the skill of communication to an entire new level. Learn how to talk to others in person. Get off dating apps, social media apps, and get into the real world and start talking to others. Not only are you going to find out more about others, you will also find out more about yourself. And in the business world, you are going to have to talk to others face to face. A screen isn’t going to do.

10- Finally, alcohol is like cancer for your body. Twenty-somethings always feel the need to “get drunk” or “get high” at parties, when things are tough, etc. Forty year old women know that if we need to get high – we get high on life. Yes, we have an occasional drink from time to time, but we don’t rely on alcohol, basically because we don’t have time to stay in bed with a hangover or frankly want one. (Let the beer vs wine debate begin)

Age will happen whether you’re afraid of it or not, so get living! I don’t believe in age, I believe in energy. Stop telling older women that they are “too old” – remember, one day, the roles will reverse. Karma has a way of sneaking up on you.